Armpit of the Nation

Armpit of the Nation

I’ve heard it said that you shouldn’t discipline your kids when you’re angry.  Perhaps that a bit of what I had going on this morning.  Living less than a minute away from New Town Elementary, I was highly annoyed to find out that 1) there was a major construction project starting and 2) they were moving Watchtower to another location that makes me take the bypass around said construction project and 3) just kidding the project hasn’t started yet but we’re going to move Watchtower regardless.  So I decided I was going to make everyone else miserable with me.

Despite the new (old) location, 24 PAX showed up for a bootcamp beatdown/MASH workout/2 random guys running through the woods.  DICCS were poorly attempted by YHC and we were off.


Mosey around for a while


Slow Mountain Climbers

Downward Dog

Calf Stretches

The Thang:

We started with the 4 legged starfish.  20 reps of Derkins, Big Bois, Mike Tysons, Bomb Jacks.  5 Burpees in the middle, 2 rounds of everything.  I made the comment early on that I was hating my own workout, which I take to be a generally good sign.  We did some one-legged bridges in the middle which look a bit sensual but really work those hamstrings.  I kind of waited for the six (sorry Zinfandel!), then moseyed around the long way to the Elementary school lot.

The next set was a real crowd-pleaser.  We grabbed a “walking rock”, and then did 3 sets of 3 legs – lunge walk across the parking lot army carrying your rock, bear crawls back across the lot, and then sprinting back to your rock.  Sprints were looking a bit like a trot at this point, and banter was turning into griping.  Chastain definitely had the best form out there and was getting out the energy he’d been storing up for the past week.  We finished with a few of Thor’s Hammers (American Hammers with rocks). Mosey to the front of the school.

Partner exercises here.  Partner 1 ran the smallish loop, while Partner 2 did exercises.  Total of 100 hand-release Merkins and 150 Knee Slappers.  Shoulders and chest were feeling great at this point…

Finished by moseying to the lot of COT, jailbreaking home, and Have A Nice Day for a solid 90 seconds.  It would have been peaceful if Schneider could have used his inside voice, but oh well!


The main banter this morning was just a continuation of the Playhouse chest-thumping about the almighty status of New Jersey.  Apparently those from there haven’t heard that it’s the armpit of the nation.  We’ve got a few good PAX from there, I’m just not sure how they haven’t figured out how much better the Carolinas are.  Of course, they did move from there voluntarily, so perhaps they realize it but just can’t bring themselves to admit it yet.

Posse and Honeycomb heard that it was going to be a doozy and decided before we started to do their own workout in the woods.

Fusebox threatened me with a tire iron I believe.  I learned early on that if I wanted to get out of a task like laundry or ironing, just do it bad enough and you won’t be asked to do it again.  We’ll see how that works out for me.

O69 has really impressed me lately.  His pace has gotten faster and faster, and it’s been fun to watch.


  • Mad Dog is getting ready to join the Respect crowd, so congrats on the early birthday!
  • Some idiot mom’s have been chewing out Mayhem’s daughters who are lifeguarding at Walnut Creek.  Prayers for wisdom on how to handle it.  Several PAX volunteered to throw their own pool party over there and give them a taste of their own medicine.
  • Convergence on Memorial Day at 6:30 – lots of workout options available.
  • F3 Dad Camp – Radar could use a few more volunteers, it sounds like an awesome weekend and my kids are begging me for it after hearing about it at Clyent Dinner.
  • Blood drive June 19th at Five Stones?



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