Extending the Second Death



Extending the Second Death

A few months back, I came across Fishwrap’s backblast out of Metro (http://f3metro.com/2019/07/03/killing-fishwrap/) and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. If you don’t want to click on the link (not going to be on the toilet that long?), he talks about the concept that there are 2 deaths. Your first death is your physical release from this mortal coil. Your second death is when your name or memory is no longer mentioned in this world. Barring you do something really (in)famous, everyone dies twice. At some point, no one on this planet will ever know you existed. The time between the two deaths may be a good indication of what kind of legacy you leave. If that’s given you the bad kind of tinglies, might I suggest hopping into the final quarter of Q Source, beginning this week? These final months will talk about the aspects of Leaving Right (Get Right → Live Right → Lead Right → Leave Right). Mondays after Asylum or Fridays after Cerberus.

Why the heavy words today, Posse?

My Dad, Dallas, died from cancer about 9 years ago, while my wife was pregnant with our second son. Today, my Dad would have been 94. So all the reps revolved around his birthday (10/9/25) or 94. In addition, I tried to do or create exercises to memorialize him. An active eulogy, if you will. The Pax didn’t know it until now, but they have helped me push my Dad’s second death a little further down the road. 

When I first came up with this workout idea, I was hesitant to follow through with it. Then, in the middle of the night last week, I was persuaded. My oldest son, also Dallas, was making some noise in his bathroom. Walking in on a teenager in those circumstances is always dangerous, but I was more angry than anything that he woke me up & was about to wake the rest of the house. I open the door, just about to whisper-yell, when I see he is sobbing. I don’t say a thing. “I was thinking about Pop Pop. With everything I’ve been doing, I just want him to be proud of me. The way that you and Mom have been comparing us, I love that I carry on his name; but sometimes I struggle to live up to that level.” 

“I feel the same way, son.”

Wow. A 14-year-old is able to crystallize what I’ve been feeling for decades about my Dad. Maybe you have similar sentiments. That’s when I committed to this Q. 

The Warmup

Stolen straight from The Fort’s Tesh when I was canvassing for the #Launch-vergence, this Highland Games-esqe activity lines up with the Scotch-Irish lineage on my Dad’s side.
Teams of 3 line up, picking a suitable kettlebell. Give it 5 swings and release it as far as you can. Then do 10 squats and 9 merkins. By the time you finish, it’s your turn again. Go to the end of the field. Planned on having a return trip, but the aim of these guys was already starting to worry me.
Bring the KB’s back to the start.

The Irish Walk – Teams of 3 by weight. Gotta get to Mount Chiseled, but one Pax cannot touch the ground. Everyone has to be in this no-ground position at least once. #PaxGear It is genuinely mentally uncomfortable to be carried when you feel you are perfectly capable of getting there yourself. Most men are fine carrying someone else but hate when they have to be carried. For these few seconds, reflect on what you’re thinking/feeling. Your level of discomfort is probably a good reflection of how willing you are to open up when you need help.
My Dad would have enjoyed being the carrier and being carried. He probably would have acted like a king when it would have been his turn to get carried. He always had an infectious, carefree attitude. I am a worrier and an over planner, but I’ve been getting better at tapping into that mindset.

Collapsing Bridges – On the backside of Mt. Chiseled, plank up elbow to elbow on the steep side of the hill. I start at the bottom sending sandbags under the bridge of humanity. If you’re not pulling sandbags, do shoulder taps. I’ve done the Tunnel of Love a couple of times, and certain non-Damascus Pax tend to get creeped out by it. The sandbag version seemed to accommodate the Personal Space Pax.
Once all the bags are at the top of the hill, flip on your back & flutter kick while they come down. Now face the opposite direction to use the other arm in dragging it up the hill. Repeat for the Bridge of Hate.
Back when my son, Little D, was around 4, we would play this game where one of us would be the bridge, and the other would be a bus going under the bridge. At some point, the bridge would collapse on the bus, to the delight of all. When I told Big D about this game, he said he wanted to play! So we have pictures of both D’s, at 83 & 4, playing the bridge game. My Dad never lost his playful spirit. There was always a fun way to look at any circumstance. In his final days, when I had to tell him that his cancer had returned and had it had spread throughout his major organs, he responded, “Well, I guess I’m walking the green mile…”
Subsequently, we made sure to put the fun in his funeral. Hate you missed it. You would have had a blast.

Head back to the start, but 2 Pax have to have a handle on each sandbag, lifting in cadence. If you don’t have any gear, sprint to the start and then back to the six. Take their gear.

The Thang

Station work with One Horse Open Slay or Broke Farmer Carry as the timer

Dips
American Hammer with KB
Lateral Raises
Lateral Ladder Squats
Abyss Merkins on Blocks
Snow Angels with Bricks

The 1HOS is a Christmas remembrance of my Dad starting a charity at our church. Here’s my favorite story about that.

In 1986, I was involved in a program called Salkehatchie.  Salkehatchie is like a Habitat for Humanity for mostly South Carolina Methodists.  He saw how I was so changed by that week in the summer that he thought those same people needed to be visited again around Christmas time.  So he called it CHRISTmas HANDS. He got the church to collect up donations of food and clothing to go back to those families in Columbia who were helped during that Salkehatchie week.  So here we are, a caravan of several cars filled with food & clothes. We were just about to leave the church parking lot for Columbia when a woman calls the church, asking Dallas if she could bring a kerosene heater for us to take down. Something like that was not on our list, but Dallas said: “Sure, we’ll wait for you.” When he hung up, he wasn’t too happy about having to wait or trying to figure out where he was going to put it.

We get to Columbia, and as we were unloading items for one family, a man across the street came over and asked, “Hey, you wouldn’t happen to have a kerosene heater in there, would ya’? I have no heat in my house.”

Stunned by the request, my Dad reached into the back of the truck, pulled out the heater and handed it to him. He then reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a $20 bill that someone else had handed to him in the church parking lot (also at the last minute), and gave that to him so he could afford some kerosene.

My Dad must have told me that story 10 times in his last year, and we cried about it every time. When you think about how many people had to listen to God AND obey Him so that THAT man could have heat for the winter, it’s just overwhelming.  It was such a wonderful illustration of being a channel for God’s love and in the process, everyone gets wet.
I’ve been shown time and again that listening to those faint nudges is God’s way of lining me up with His work. And being immediately obedient to those nudges has helped me hear those subsequent nudges easier. Positive feedback loop.

Partner up by opposite ability
94 Tricep Extensions
94 Bench Press
94 Curls
Other partner karaokes/side straddles to island and back

Frisburpee – All plank except 4, who are throwing a frisbee to each other. If it’s a bad throw or no catch, the group does a burpee. If the pair does any kind of trick shot & makes it, they are exempt from the next time a burpee is called. 
Carb Load now has a standing invitation to come to my house to throw the frisbee. Gotta get you ready for CanJam season.

My Dad worked in a plastics factory for all my childhood. On his feet all day in a hot, cement warehouse. Smoking a couple packs of Camels every day. And yet, almost every day I asked (which was most days), he would throw the frisbee, football, baseball, whatever, with me after school. I was always amazed when my other friends said their dads didn’t play with them nearly the amount mine did. And most of their dads had office jobs. But I still didn’t fully appreciate that until I had kids. I vowed to play with my kids every chance I could. I know it’s had an impact on my oldest. By the time he got into 5th grade, he asked that we not throw anything in the front yard; that we should throw in the back yard. He said he was tired of his friends coming up and either asking him to go do something else or wanting to throw as well. Now that he’s in high school, our throws are getting less frequent, but I know he values them when we do. Not near as much as I do, though.
I’m not doing as well with the second child. But this new job is providing me with the afternoon time I needed to get the critical playtime we both crave. I encourage you to do the same. Taking them to a practice is not the same as playing with them. Coaching or critiquing every throw is not the same as playing with them. Talking about what’s on their minds as they throw IS playing.

I know it was not a brutal ending to a workout that you may have wanted. But I had so much fun in those last few minutes with you guys! I hope you can reflect on today’s workout not so much with sore muscles, but with a happy heart.

I took us out slightly differently than normal. Before the prayer, I asked everyone to think of 2 people who have had a major impact on their lives – one dead & one alive. They cannot be historical figures, but ones you knew personally.
For the dead one, I encouraged the Pax to memorialize that person TODAY, whether it was donating to their favorite charity, eat at their favorite restaurant, etc. For our family, we are going to McAllister’s tonight for a French dip, potato salad, & sweet tea. My Dad ordered that after church every Sunday for years.
For the living one, go tell that person TODAY what kind of impact they made in your life. Be specific. It’s a good bet they don’t even know.
Mine is going to the youth director who got our church involved in Salkehatchie. My worldview would be completely different (certainly less compassionate) without her coming along in my adolescence.

Our extended family is split between Methodists & Baptists. We would attend each other’s church, but my Dad would make sure to poke a stick as he went. The irony of having this workout at a Baptist church demands that I wrap up with his favorite Baptist joke:
How do you keep a Baptist from drinking all the liquor in your house?
Invite two of them.

Announcements:

Speed for Need needs runners for this Saturday, 10/12 at Let Them Soar in Matthews. https://letthemsoar5k.raceroster.com/ Three runners have dropped and an additional chariot rider has come forward. SFN can even cover your admission if cost is an issue. Contact Rubbermaid or Gypsy for more details & training. Rockwell did, and he’s expecting you to be there with him!

Fusebox became Soapbox for 22 seconds ala War on Christmas style. Ask him for more details, but something about patriotism & Christianity being censored in sports. So reject political correctness and be more open about your patriotism and Christianity.

Clothes folding fun at Christ Closet this Thursday 5:30 PM. Wives & kids welcome. Going to Clyent Dinner? Swing by afterward! Get with Carb Load, Dana, or Ackbar (HBD BTW) for more details. They need to be folded for…

11/9 CSAUP in West Charlotte. http://f3metro.com/2019/10/03/west-charlotte-csaup/ Shop Dawg is Q’ing the Christ Closet giveaway & needs your help. All 3 F’s, but heavier on the 2nd & 3rd F’s than the next announcement on the same day.

11/9 CSAUP in Area 51 / SOB. The Vagabond http://f3southcharlotte.com/2019/10/07/vagabond-2019-csaup-info-pre-blast-and-t-shirt-order/ 13-ish miles across 6 AO’s with 15-minute workouts at each stop. If you don’t want to do all 13 miles, the link gives arrival times at each AO so you can drop in/out for your too low choice of milage.

Q School & Site Q School 11/2 Saturday at Chick-fil-a in Blakeney. Sign up here: https://www.signupgenius.com/go/30e0d49afac2aa6fc1-qschool If you don’t know what this is, then you need to go. Talk to me or others who have attended. Do NOT talk to Rubbermaid or Tupperware about it!



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And I Got Downhearted, Every Time That I … – F3 South CharlottePosted on3:08 pm - Oct 12, 2019

[…] Chastain recommended reading Posse’s backblast about THE SECOND DEATH. Here it is >>> http://f3southcharlotte.com/2019/10/09/extending-the-second-death/ […]

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