Jingle Bell Rock

Jingle Bell Rock

Good morning Imperials and Rebel Alliance, Admiral Ackbar here.  So FuseBox kindly asked me if I would Q Chiseled today. Well, I’ve never Q’ed Chiseled, or even been to Chiseled before. Of course I had to be out of town on vacay the Wednesday before. So after reading way too many backblasts and constantly asking FuseBox questions (is there actually a Mt. Chiseled, is there gear available, etc), and after digging out a cinderblock half buried in the backyard, here we go. Hopefully this is “Chiseled” enough. PS, it was very very cold. Not Hoth cold which kills tauntans (and things get messy), but pretty darn cold.

Warm Up

  • Mosey to Mt Chiseled
  • 30 LBSs
  • 20 Mt Climbers
  • 20 Merkins
  • 15 Imperial Walkers
  • Calf Stretch (received much positive feedback here)
  • Downward & Upper Dog

The Thang

Phase 1:

  • 1 Overhead Curl & Press, 5 Squats with block
  • Run to the Mt. and back
  • 2 Overhead, 4 Squats
  • Run to the Mt. and back
  • 3 Overhead, 3 Squats
  • Run to Mt. and back
  • 4 Overhead, 2 Squats
  • Run to Mt. and back
  • 5 Overhead, 1 Squat 
  • Run to Mt. (as usual, I had a hard time explaining it, but it worked out).

Phase 2:

  • Bearcrawl Over Mt. (kinda steep the other side, wasn’t expecting that)
  • 20 Big Boy Situps
  • Bearcrawl Back
  • 20 Big Boy Situps 
  • Plank it up
  • Return to Cinderblock forest (so dubbed by Mad Dog)

Phase 3: JINGLE BELL ROCK (the coup de grace)

  • First, 20 Kettle Bell Swings
  • So I had been saving a version of this for Impromptu. I brought my handy Bluetooth speaker, paid up for Spotify, and now I can play Jingle Bell Rock by Bobby Helms over and over. Bicep Curls with the Blocks every time you hear the word Jingle! Yeah, it says Jingle a lot. The catch, whenever at rest waiting for a new “Jingle,” hold the block at 90 degrees. It’s a long wait at the bridge. By the way, the word Jingle is used 28 times (just counted afterward). So Jingle Bell Bicep Curls!
  • Mosey to Mt Chiseled. 30 Bobby Hurleys. Return to Cinderblock Forest
  • Jingle Bell Rock again with Blocks. This time on your back, holding the block above you, go down and push up on the word Jingle. DO NOT LOCK YOUR ELBOWS. And on the bridge take the block behind you on my command, work those triceps. Equally fun.
  • Mosey to Mt Chiseled. 20 Heels to Heaven. Return to Cinderblock Forest.
  • 20 Kettle Bell Swings
  • Jingle Bell Rock Bicep Curls. (The Christmas spirit felt dimmer this time).
  • Mosey to Mt Chiseled. 15 Mike Tysons. Return to Cinderblock Forest.
  • 20 Kettle Bell Swings.
  • Jingle Bell Rock Presses on your Back with called Tricep Curls (2 this time).
  • Mosey to Mt Chiseled. 10 Burpees (because I have a reputation to maintain, how dare I not do burpees).
  • Returned at 6:15 on the dot!


  • For my first Chiseled, it was fun! I hope it Chiseled appropriately. It’s hard to type right now if that’s any comfort.
  • Props to Schneider on the planks (while waiting for the 6th) to keep those butts down, especially on elbows. (I was one of those…but fortunately he was looking the other way. Whew!)
  • Every time in Jingle Bell Rock when Bobby Helms sang the lyrics, “Giddy-up!,” that was mistaken for a “Jingle.” Every time! It tickled me!
  • Big thanks to FuseBox for his Yoda-like advice as I prepped today’s workout. Bless you sir!
  • The 6th man today was Golden Plates. Golden Plates shared about his name (Golden Plates are the source of the Mormon Bible as he grew up Mormon, apologized to any Mormons for the quick description [as a religious-clergy dude it sounded okay to me!]), how he’s been working out for a few months now, and appreciated the fellowship. “A great bunch of guys.” I spotted Golden Plates busting it hard today, especially with those evil elbow planks. Well done sir and thank you!


  • Q School this Saturday, Nov 21st, 7-9am at Calvary Church (5801 Pineville-Matthews Rd, Charlotte NC 28226). Sign up is on GroupMe.
  • Union UMC says thank you to everyone who has donated to our Children’s Food Drive, to make “Kids Bags” to the children who come with their parents and grandparents to the Thursday Food Drive. We will continue to collect through the month. Look for the Green Poster Boards to find the donation plastic tub (under the bell tower in front of the round building/sanctuary.
  • Union UMC is also sponsoring a family for Christmas. This family is a grandmother raising her 5 grandchildren, ages 2-9. She is a bus driver for UCPS (and many of you know how much I care about our bus drivers, #fedupfather). We have set up a Amazon Wish List, and all purchases will go to our team leader who will wrap and deliver the presents before Christmas (some are necessities, some are gifts). Any help is appreciated. I’ll put a link here and also in GroupMe.
  • https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/3U6OTFMOXME2O?type=wishlist

May the Force be with you, and that’s the Jingle Bell Rock!


About the author

Ackbar author

Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x