Shocking Soccer Skills!
16 fine gents arose in the wee hours to take on a soccer (real football) style workout which turned out to be more intense than English Q had planned – you will see why later…
THE THANG
Jog to parking lot
SSH x 20
IW x 20
Squat x 15
Merkin x 10
Stagger merkin R x 5
(Enter Matlock)
Stagger merkin L x 5
Jacobs Ladder x 7 with additional Turkish get ups at base, midway merkin, burpee at top. Plank at bottom when finished.
Mosey to soccer field.
Partner up grab soccer ball and get in line with a tire.
Partner 1 – high knees with taps on soccer ball
Partner 2 – sprint to tires and tricep dips x 10 sprint and tag partner
Repeato
Partner 1 – stagger soccer ball push ups
Partner 2 – sprint to tires and dry docks x 10 and sprint tag partner
Repeato
Partner 1 – mason twists with soccer ball and feet up
Partner 2 – sprint to tires and tire squats with tire above head x 10
Repeato
Partner 1 – squeeze ball between feet and raise and lower legs
Partner 2 – sprint to tires and merkins around the tire and tag partner
Repeato
Partner 1 – spartan burpee on soccer ball
Partner 2 – sprint to tires inside grip merkins x 10 sprint and tag partner
Gather soccer balls at top of field. One player shoots at goal. If he makes it no punishment. If he misses he sprints to get ball and pax do five burpees. Reps of exercise build with each missed shot.
COT
MOLESKIN
Q thought a little taster of the “beautiful game” would be a good thing in the cold and wet conditions that reminded him of the homeland. As the pax warmed up their bodies in preparation for the pain some familiar headlights appeared up on the hill as Matlock made his appearance a little earlier than usual. With warm bodies (but for the 51 year old attorney) the extended Jacobs Ladder set the tone with Donkey Kong off to a flier. Like Geraldo a few weeks back the boy may have “blown his wad” a little too early but still finished strong. Bananas disputed some of the pax counting abilities as we planked ready for next event.
Tire exercise with the balls thrown in were tough going and partners worked hard and with little down time. Some sloshing in the tires sounded like the spilling of merlot (puking) but the lads sucked it up and kept it in. With a good 10 minutes left (according to Greenwich mean time) we gathered the soccer balls 40 yards from the small goal for our own Kevlar penalty shootout. If goal was scored move onto next guy. If shot missed 5 burpees for all pax and keep adding with each miss:
Turkey Leg – miss (5 burpees)
Cottontail – miss (6 burpees)
Good Hands not Good Feet- miss (7 burpees)
Brown – awful miss and nearly hit Matlocks car w dog in it (8 burpees)
Skywalker – made it (no burpees – thank The Lord)
Donkey Kong – shank ( 9 burpees)
Bananas – close but miss (10 burpees)
At this point audible Q call to do any rep of any exercise!
Sprague – post but miss (11 squats)
War Daddy – miss (12 military merkins)
Barracus – miss (13 split jumps)
If you are not listed we know you missed as only made one thanks to the one armed wonder! Ran out of time so not all pax got to shoot. Bananas called an audible for soccer shooting practice at the Rock tomorrow!
Thanks for coming out lads. Good sweat this morning. Have a great weekend.
Back to Basics — Feel The Burn!
33 Death Valley faithful posted around the VSF and got after their mid week downPAINment. After a day of slinging dumbbells around (shoulders, bi’s & tri’s) and playing Double Dutch jump rope with one another (I swear I even so a few of the PAX playing hopscotch yesterday), it was time to get back to our roots for some old fashioned cardio-burn!
the Thang:
Run down to the track for a quick circuit .
50x SSH
20x Imperial “WANKERS” in our best accents from across the pond
15x Merkins
20x LBCs – hold – 20x Dollies – hold – 20x Flutters – hold – 20x Rosalitas – hold
HOOPS work (a.k.a Basketball):
Mosey to Basketball Courts for 11s – Jump Squats and Merkins (run width of 2 courts between each set of exercises) – Plank
“Burpee Suicides” – 7x – Plank
Bear crawl length – Run back – 5 burpees
Rail Work:
Mosey down to the ball field(s) to the rails for “Supine Pull Up Ladder” – crowd pleaser
10x inboard – 8x inboard – 6x inboard – 4x inboard – 10x inboard
Field work:
Mosey to field for “Burpee Merkins”
Sprint to mid field and back (100 yards) – 5 merkins – Plank
Sprint full length of field and back (200 yards) – 5 merkins – Plank in the interest of time, we had to scratch this segment but wanted to ensure we got the full effect with the final 2.
Sprint to mid field and back and full length and back (300 yards) – 5 merkins
Plankorama
Sprint full length and back 2x (400 yards) – 5 merkins – Plank
Mosey back to Bball Courts / Parking Lot for COT
Moleskin:
_Large showing today with a PAX of 33 arriving in the gloom – QIC thought about splitting up the PAX into 2 groups but was beat down with mutiny stating “We come as a group, we work out as a group and we leave as a group”. Nuff said!
_Great to see Skywalker making a strong comeback off the DL and bringing it strong…
_Strong showing by Donkey Kong once again, brother continues to just bring it day in and day out, ruck no ruck, rain no rain etc… Donkey Kong don’t care, he don’t give a ……!!!!!!! – great to have you out.
_Tclaps to Bulldog and Run Stopper playing the rabbits throughout the workout. #too fast for me – sorry TR but you only get an honorable mention this go round. Especially since you were caught vacationing during COP – Have to give respect to HOPs, Cheese Kurd and (Abacus, Smash, Lex Luthor, Hammer, Wolfman etc….), you boys were flying out there.
Dumbbell Tabata & Jump Rope Beatdown
23 pax went Old School this morning back to our early days of Skunk Works to make a downPAINment with a dumbbell tabata, leaving our kettle bells at home, and tapping our inner Rocky with the jump rope!
Warmup – SSH in cadence x 30
The Thang:
Dumbbell Tabata – 3 minutes total each exercise broken up by 30 seconds doing exercise then 30 second static hold x 3. In between each exercise we jumped rope for 1 minute straight.
Exercises / Static Hold:
1) Squat – Bicep Curl Combo / Sit in low squat with arms in 90 degree curl position
Jump Rope 1 Min.
2) Shoulder Press / Hold weights overhead w/ arms straight
Jump Rope 1 Min.
3) Tricep Extension – Tricep Kickback / Hold arms with weight overhead with arm in 90 degree tricep extension position
Jump Rope 1 Min.
4) Merkins / Plank
Jump Rope 1 Min.
5) Lunges alternating legs / Low squat hold with weights.
Jump Rope 1 Min.
6) Bicep Curls / Hold arms out in 90 degree Curl Position
Jump Rope 1 Min.
7) LBC / Hold in 45 degree angle
Jump Rope 1 Min.
8) Flutter 30 Sec / 6″ Hold / Dolly 30 Sec. / 6″ Hold / Rosalita 30 Sec. / 6 “Hold
Jump Rope 1 Min.
9) 20 Burpees on your own
Jump Rope 1 Min.
10) Regular Plank, Right Leg High, Left Leg High
Jump Rope 1 Min.
COT
Moleskin:
Great work by all the pax this morning, I know this one whipped YHC! I wanted to go Old School back to our early Skunk Work days of doing Tabatas with either dumbbells or center blocks, but wanted to kick it up a notch with the cardio by doing jump ropes between each exercise. Loved the comment by Chum when he asked what the h*ll us who Q do late at night while we are thinking up all these crazy exercises! We will definitely be seeing this one again!
YHC was looking for Haggis to show up with his trailer hitch to his Jeep or Jamboree with his bottles of bleach to work out with but where no shows. We did however have a pax show up with a square combo weight that looked like a car battery, just can’t recall who it was.
And don’t look now but Matlock only missed the 30 SSH to open up with! You’re almost on time now brother, making strides!
Red Eye – Soft Launch
Ten hearty souls, including 3 (!) FNGs, got after it for the soft launch of Area 51’s newest workout, The Red Eye. This one’s targeted for Pax who are tired of the same old same old. 0400 – 0500 on Mondays.
WARM UP
SSH x 250. In cadence. (Who’s your Daddy, Ice 9?)
THANG
Dog Sequence
- Up Dog
- Down Dog
- Bird Dog (point leg and opp hand, Lx20, Rx20)
- Dirty Dog (leg lifts, Lx20, Rx20)
- Bum Scratcher (sit on rear, legs in front, use arms to drag bum across pavement—just like your dog does on the carpet)
Rinse and Repeat
Partner Work
- Chest to Chest Partner carries x 50 yards. Flapjack
- Partner drag by feet x 50 yards. Flapjack
- Piggyback Partner Plank x 1 min. (Partner 1 in plank, partner 2 in piggyback on partner 1). Flapjack
- Partner Press/Merkins: Partner 1 on Back. Partner 2 in Merkin Position atop partner 1. Pax 1 bench presses Pax 2 while Pax 2 performs Merkins. Flapjack.
- People’s Merkins x 20: Partner 1 in People’s Chair on wall. Partner 2–merkins with hands on knees of Partner 1. Flapjack.
- Partner Plank Squats x 10: Partner 1 in plank. Partner 2 step up on Partner 1’s back for Squats. Flapjack.
- Partner Plank Step Ups x 10L/10R: Same as above. Flapjack.
- Partner Plank Jump Ups x 10: Same as above. #Crowdpleaser, Flapjack.
- Partner Plank Dips x20: Partner 1 in Plank (tuck chin to chest). Partner 2 back to partner 1 with hands on Partner 1 shoulders, dips). Flapjack.
- Partner Muscle Ups: Partner 1 in quarter squat. Partner 2 has to get to seated position on Partner 1’s shoulders (with no assistance from partner 1). Flapjack.
- Chest to Chest partner carries x 50 yards. 1x Squat every 20 steps. Flapjack
Feats of Strength
- Tree Humpers (Wrap arms and legs around tree, hold for 1 min)
- Rinse and repeat
COT
MOLESKIN
- Phenomenal start and great numbers for an invitation only, short-notice soft launch to F3/Red Eye. I was concerned a one hour workout at 0400 might scare some people away, but I should have known better. This one’s hear to stay. Hard launch date forthcoming.
- Strong work by the three FNGs. Runstopper’s younger brother just moved to town and joined us for his first F3 tilt. Turns out Runstopper is the tall one in his family….#Lilliput. Wanker is challenging Bananas for the A51 EH title, bringing out his neighbor, FNG Rod Johnson. It’s hard to find a derivative of Wanker that’s family friendly, but we managed with Vas Def. Sounds like a rapper. Finally, Hops’ brother-in-law was in town from Salt Lake City. Had to be O’Douls (especially since he wouldn’t let us name his 2.0 that at the Rock Saturday). TClaps, gents. It doesn’t get easier–you get stronger.
- Kotters to Camel Toes. Last time we saw CT was during the (only-slightly veiled) Full Monty at the Rock with the tights sans shorts. No tights needed today as the balmy temps officially brings a close to displaced Yankees complaining about 36 degree temperatures. Until October anyway.
- Good job by Walking Farts. Might have been a little too enthusiastic on the Piggy Back Partner Planks…..”Recover” means get off (and it appears you were trying….just sayin’).
- Didn’t have time for the Chicken Fights. Maybe next time.
- Wanker mentioned the #treehumpers when recounting the SnowRuck tales so we gave it a whirl this morning. A slight burning sensation in the frontal region, but otherwise a fantastic full-body exercise. #neosporin. #keeper
- Nice work by Wanker and Joker joining me for the #doubledown at The Matrix. #raceseason
Aye!
Monday Morning Fun
Run to track [ On 2nd lap, 5 burpees on each corner]
Circle Up
2. Side Straddle Hop
3. Imperial Walker
4. Merkins
5. Track run, 5 burpees on each corner.
6. Squat-apalooza
1. Slow squats x 20
2. Deep squat hold
3. Speed squat x 20 (5 sets)
Head to Wall
1. Wall sit. 1:30
2. Merkins x 20
3. Wall sit 1:00
4. mercins x 20
5. Wall sit 0:45
6. Balls to wall 0:30
Run to playground
1. Pull-Ups x 10
2. Bench Dips x 30
3. Pointer Dog Extensions x 10 (each side)
(Repeat for 2 sets)
Circle Up
1. Mason Twist x 20
2. Leg drop x 12
3. Dolly x 15
4. Rosalita x 15
5. LBC x 25
6. 10 Burpees
Donkey Kong vs The FNG Takeover
31 pax, including 9 FNGs (yes that is 9!) start the day off right at The Rock for a little leg work mixed in with a couple of burpees!
The Thang:
Mall Cop Lead:
Jog around the church parking lot and circle up for COP all in cadence:
SSH x 30
Imperial Wokkah x 25
Squat x 20
Slow Perkins (perfect Merkins) x 10
Lunge Walk 30 yds, then mosey to baseball outfield and partner up (size does matter) for:
Partner Piggy Back Squats x 10, Flap Jack
Partner Plank Decline Merkins x 10, Flap Jack
Repeato for both
Prarie Fire Mary – Partner Leg Throws x 30 Right, Left, Center
Lunge Walk, Backwards Run, Karaoke Left, Karaoke Right across parking lot to picnic table benches for:
4 Sets of Step-ups x 15, Squats x 15, LBCs x 15.
One more set of Squats x 40, then handoff to DK.
Donkey Kong Lead:
- Another great day at The Rock with 9 FNGs, 6 sons (2.0s) and 3 strong and brave men! Welcome brothers, today was what F3 is all about. Great 1st F workout, much 2nd F Fellowship with many guys cheering each other on, and a great prayer to close out the morning prior to coffeetiria. The men of The Rock are showing great leadership and setting a great example to our sons and families. What an awesome site to see our younger men embracing the workout and giving it their all. You boys did a great job and we look forward to seeing Sidecar, Dan-O, Barqs, Hot Shot, Crossbar, and Laser Beam out in the gloom again! A special welcome to our Adult FNGs Duff, Goon, and Moon River. We are glad you came out and look forward to you making many more downPAINments on the day with us on a regular basis!
- YHC (Your Humble Correspondent) talked with DK last night to make a plan for the workout. I wanted DK to lead whatever he wanted as this was going to be his morning. After hearing what he had planned YHC decided to go a little easier on the first half of the workout, however I just walked down my stairs prior to typing this out and think the leg work accomplished what it was supposed to! Can you say sore tomorrow! We’ve done 100 burpees in a workout before, but 110 in a 30 minute period mixed in with so many pain stations in between caused many Unsavory and FEBA calls today! Nice job Donkey Kong on a solid lead. We look forward to you leading many more workouts at The Rock!
- Namarama was once again classic with Chuck-E Cheese 2.0 being named Laser Beam! Sorry brother but you can’t rename yourself! And its always cool to see a nick name develop from a classic comedy like Fletch. I’m sure Moon River is a great Intern, but I’m not sure I would want to see him for my next checkup, #sausagefingers!
- Hope everyone has a Blessed Easter Weekend as we reflect on the love and grace that our Savior showed almost 2,000 years ago. The only perfect and righteous man to ever step foot on earth willingly gave his life so that sinners like you and me can be seen as righteous in the eyes of our Father, if we profess to believe!
Starting to grow
The Thang:
Jog to the East parking lot for warm up.
SSHs x25
Squats x20
Merkins x15
Mountain Climbers x20
Jog to the back door.
Wheel Barrows up the ramp, crab walk back.
10 Merkins
Rotate partners and do it again.
Jog to the front picnic tables
11s Step up and decline Merkins
Jog to the rear parking lot.
Sprint to each light pole, 5 Burpees at each pole.
10 Squats at the end, and return with 5 Burpees at each pole.
Hand off to Hops:
Jog to practice FB field, scale rock on the way.
2 lines in the end zone for 2 minutes of up-downs and side shuffles
Sprint 50 yds to end zone
2 lines in end zone again for 2 minutes of barrel rolls
High step 50 yds to end zone
Circle up for Plankfest for 5 minutes
Regular, Elbows, makhtar ndjiaye’s, Christian Laettners (hate), etc, etc, mumble chatter, etc
Jog to parking lot for 6 MoM, scaling rock on the way.
Dolly, Freddy Mercury, LBCs, Protractor, CCVs
Mole Skin:
-Great showing today, last few weeks I brought a pen and paper and did not need it. This week I did not bring them and definitely needed it. (forgive me, those of you I miss and please sound off below)
-Still no key to the stadium, it is not from lack of trying. I will stay on it.
-Thanks to Hops for the beat down today, let me know who wants to step up next.
-Have a great Easter everyone! Aye
Kevlar – Jack Webb with a 6 pack twist
21 pax including two FNG’s (Scott Willis – Lobstertail and Tyler Steven Voss – Aerosmith) arrived at CDS read for a good beatdown on Good Friday. The tires glistened in the morning frost and as appetizing as they looked they were not needed for today’s downpainment.
THE THANG
Jog to base of hill
SSH x 25
Speed skaters x 10 each leg (Stagecoach fell over twice)
Merkin x 15
Parker Peters x 15
Right arm high
Left arm high
Mission impossible
Recover
Partner up
1 partner sprints other does burpees and flap jack. 50 burpees needed between pair.
Repeato with Spartan burpees x 40.
Bearkins (bear crawl with merkin each 3 steps) up hill and sprint down, partner goes.
Sprint up, bearkins down (face down if feeling tough, feet down if not waiting to tear rotator cuff)
Mosey to pain stations and three groups)
1) 15 burpees (call switch when someone from group completes 15)
2) tricep dips on bench
3) two footed jumps on bench
Repeato
Sprint all out to top parking lot (not done yet)
Jack Webbs up to 11 with LBC’s instead of shoulder presses.
Mary’s.
MOLESKIN
A tough workout today for all 21 pax as we hopefully saw off Old Man Winter and the freezing temps. Speed skater warm ups were interesting challenge for some of our balance challenged men (Stagecoach) but once through warm ups the real fun began. Q asked pax to find someone of different fitness level so I fought off four lads to get Bananas! The 50 burpee call on the hills was a tough start but it was good seeing guys encouraging their partner. Saw a few sandbaggers taking their sorry time getting to bottom of hill to take over burpee count. Whoever got stuck with Brown knocked out around 47 of the 50. Good going.
Repeato got a few moans as Spartan burpees kicked in and I have to thank Dolphin for the bearkin idea up and down hill.
Pain stations kept us moving and Strikeout’s counting came into question on round one with the 15 burpees. I think he combined his whole groups burpees to then call the switch. After the sprint back to the school many thought the day was done but as we dropped to our knees Jack Webb came a knocking. The LBC’s meant that the spring break six packs should be in fine shape for next week.
Hats off to FNGs Scott Willis (Lobstertail) and Tyler Steven Voss (Aerosmith) for coming out and hanging strong. Great to have you guys join us. Awesome job by all.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Saturday workouts as scheduled with Stonehenge at 6am tomorrow and Area 51 and The Rock at 7am. Coffeteria afterwards at 8am at Starbucks Piper Glen.
Enjoy your Good Friday and Easter weekend. Give thanks for the ultimate downpainment of all.
Bulldog
Challenge accepted…see you at the finish line!
11 pax posted at Devil’s Turn this morning. Bratwurst, Dolphin, Purple Haze and YHC started at 0515 for the 6 mile course; while the remaining pax for the 4 mile course were still arriving. Since YHC typically runs the 4 miler and seeing that I would be starting a 6 mile run with an Ultra Marathoner and a Boston qualifier I immediately asked “what pace do you guys typically run…8 minutes??”
Dolphin’s answer…”there’s no way I can run an 8 minute pace today…”
Great.. then Purple Haze and YHC should be able to keep up. Purple Haze thought differently and disappear just before the 1 mile marker (nice effort brother!). Dolphin was right… 1st mile completed in 7.28 and we proceeded to average a 7.30 through 3.5 miles at which point Bratwurst says “I’m going to take a slightly longer route back through the trails and I will try beat you guys to the finish.”
Challenge accepted!
YHC enjoyed watching Bratwurst arrive at the finish line 2nd with Dolphin right on his heels. According to YHC’s watch mile 6 was completed in 6.59. Impressive guys and thanks Bratwurst for the motivation!
-The 4 mile group seemed pleased with their effort as well and t-claps to Chum for hanging in there till the end.
-Take away from today…If you are going to get up at 0445 then you had better give it all you got out there or else you are just wasting valuable sleep time. If anyone at Devil’s Turn today did not push themselves to the limit then why did you post!!
Happy Easter and safe journeys to those traveling on spring break.
49er
A hiking we will go…to Base Camp that is!
The Thang:
15x IC SSH
10x IC Imperial walker
10x IC Merkins
10x IC Prison Squats
10x IC Mountain Climbers
5 burpees oyo
10x IC jumping lunges
Hit the bleachers:
Partner up,
Partner 1: 20 dips on the bleachers
Partner 2: 10 incline merkins on the railing
Flapjack and repeato x2
Jog around the track:
Lap 1: 5 merkins in the turns
Lap 2: 10 prison squats in the turns
100 yard runs:
Down and back #1: 5 merkins
Down and back #2: 10 Imperial walkers
Down and back #3: 5 burpees
Hit the wall:
30 sec people’s chair
10 wall jumps (5 each arm), repeato on the wall jumps
5 mins of Mary:
10x IC flutter kicks
10x IC dollies
15x IC LBCs
10x IC bicycles
10x IC Russian twist
Plank
Moleskin:
Welcome to Brikette, good workout by all, thanks Smash for that downPAINment. Pax wondering when it will get warmer, then reminded by Calloway that 92F in the morning and the Pax will remember this day with fondness, who knows after all? Definite grunting by the Pax on the final russian twists (including YHC), strong by Smash to keep it going, he could do it so he Q’d it!