What Is A Burpee?……Asked and Answered!

What Is A Burpee?……Asked and Answered!

Prophetic question that was asked by FNG Joe Whalen at this mornings downPAINment known as Stonehenge. We had 11 pax come out to get their Saturday started off right. In the preblast the pax were warned to leave their rucks at home and that this workout would likely “leave a mark”. All warnings were heeded and while I can’t speak for everyone, YHC certainly has multiple “marks”. Here’s how it went down.

The Thang

Little baby jog to Stonehenge intersection crossing Johnston Road.

SSH x 50
Merkin x 20

Moderate jog toward parking deck.
5 burpees at first intersection
Lunge walk at second intersection, backward lunge walk at half way mark
Partner up at front of parking deck

Burpee Sprints
P1: Sprint to stop sign round corner and back (@150 yards)
P2: Burpees while you wait

Run to soccer field

Set of Sevens + bonus
1 merkin. Run to other goal, 6 jump squats
Continue 2/5, 3/4, 4/3, 5/2, 6/1
Bonus: 7 mountain climbers halfway through run
– coming and going – total of 84 mountain climbers

Full Deck Workout
Return to previous partner from Burpee Sprint
Run to top of parking deck – 5 levels
At each level, partners alternate 5 burpees, 10 LBC
People’s Chair x 30 sec
Quick 10 count to recover

What goes up…must come down
Run back down deck – 5 levels
Each level partners alternate 5 inverted mountain climber, 10 SSH

Run with pain back towards launch spot
Stop at every other tree. 10 merkins, then 15, 20, 25, 30
Cross Johnston and run to adjacent lot

All out sprint down and back – about 500 yards total

Back to launch lot
10 burpees
Rinse and Repeat


– Welcome to FNG Joe Whalen (F3 name Jennings) who came out this week. Nice EH by Puppy Love who was an FNG himself last week. Jennings is 53 years young and really brought today. As did all the pax. Solid work brothers.
– This was a tough workout and we never stopped or even so much as moseyed. Good thing Mary slept in this AM – we didn’t have time for her anyway.
– At our first Burpee stop, Jennings asked “What’s a Burpee?”…suffice it to say he got his answer.
– Angry Dolphin? – being awakened by the police beating on your door at 1 AM for a call where they had the wrong house does wonders for my attitude. So yes, I had some frustrations to take out. Good thing the pax were there for the receiving end.
– Wanted to incorporate some sprints and bonus burps at the end to make sure all the pax (especially Bratwurst) got their fill. Hope everyone got what they came for…and more.
– Bratwurst and Header are faaaaast! Both led on most of the sprints and runs even at the end when everyone was smoked. Solid work brothers and way to set an aggressive pace for all of us to wish we could follow.
– Harley was his usual quiet warrior self, staying at the front without even a grimace throughout the workout. May need to test for PEDs…..

– Lots of hard commit deadlines approaching. Check website for Mud Run transportation payment, BRR committal and to order the 2013 F3 racing jersey
– Continue to lift up Short Sale with his broken wrist. No F3 for him and he must be going crazy. Heal fast brother!
– Pray for a SCLT pax who lost his mother. Private dude so no names but still pray for him. Also, O’Tannebaum’s mom broke her hip. Lift ’em up.

That’s it. Aye!

Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

“It is nought good a slepyng hound to wake” is attributed to Geoffrey Chaucer, in 1374.  The Olde Englishe will sound foreign to the modern ear.  It’s where we get the phrase, “Bulldog [sic] is in the Fartsack.”  And so it was at 0530 and 17 strong went forth into the gloom wondering who would post first:  Matlock or Bulldog [sic].



  •  Little baby jog to lower lot
  • SSH x 30
  • I-Walker x 31 (prepping mental Weinke…missed it)
  • Squats, Low and Slow x 30


  • Jacob’s Ladder x5 with 2, 4, 6, 8, 10 burpees at top
  • Planks by Sprague


  •  Lunge walk up hill
  • Karaoke lunge up hill L
  • Karaoke lunge up hill R
  • Backwards lunge up hill
  • Sprint up hill
  • Karaoke up hill L
  • Karaoke up hill R
  • Backwards sprint up hill


  • Perfect Planks x 60 sec or so(no arses in the air, no packages in the dirt; align the spine with the legs, quads tight, cheeks clenched, heels back, head up)
  • Six inches (just long enough for ribald quips from Donkey Kong)
  • Dolly x 20 (hold em)
  • Rosalita x 20 (hold em at 45 deg.)
  • Low flutter x 20 (hold em)
  • High slow flutter x 20 (hold em at 45)
  • LBC x 30 (feet above knees, legs uncrossed)
  • “Hello Wanker” x 1
  • Perfect planks x 60 sec (Pax count around COP until we reach 60…we seemed to get stuck at the same person every 18 “seconds” or so)
  • Perfect planks x “60” sec (Pax count down from 60)


  • Lunge walk Fire Lane in front of HS.
  • Extra credit: wrestler walk the 2nd half


  • Flip tire
  • Bunny hop through
  • 5 burpees
  • Back of the line
  • Rinse and repeat up field and back


  • Sprint: 2 x 50 yd (? maybe?)
  • Sprint: 4 x 50 yd
  • Sprint: 6 x 50 yd (max effort on last 50)




  • It happens:  You wake up at 4 am, look at your phone and think, “How I love thee, Fartsack,”  and return to your dreams of socialized medicine, Wham!, and the Bronte sisters, only to arise at 0542 in a panic, and rush out the door.  We’ve all been there.  Don’t kick yourself in the bollocks, chum.
  • Some of the relatively new guys feeling the pain on Mary.  The Core is the strong (or weak) link in the kinetic chain and F3 does a great job tightening it up.  Stay with it–you get stronger.  And for some reason it’s easier when you lead.  Step up.
  • Controversial discussion post-COT today.  Politics?  Religion? Tiffany v. Debbie Gibson?  None of the above.  Proper burpee form.  The 6-count Stop Animation Burpee was demonstrated, as was the Flying Squirrel Burpee (sans Jazz Hands).  Each burpee style has pros and cons and the Pax is encouraged to pick the flavor that suits his needs.  He who has an ear let him hear.
  • Another birther controversy brewing, this time in SCLT.  Some are questioning Donkey Kong’s perpetual War Baby status.  By his account, he’s been 26 since 8th grade.  Perhaps Geraldo will get to the bottom of that with some hard-hitting investigative journalism.
  • Side note:  It’s hard to tell in the gloom sometimes, but if you come to HDHH you’ll agree that DK is the spitting image of that guy from Flight of the Conchords: (LINK HERE).  #Doppelganger
  • Prayer for Skywalker (aka/fka? Short Sale).  Don’t let the gloomies get you down, brother.  Also O’Tannenbaum’s mom fell and broke her hip yesterday.



  • Order your new 2013 race jersey.  Order by Feb 16 and it will be here in time for the Spartan.  Info on website.  Talk to some vets about sizing.
  • Leatherneck Mud Run participants: pay up for bus and sundries.  Swamp’s Poo List is coming out next week.  Don’t be on it.
  • Blue Ridge Relay.  Run 200+ miles for 36 hours with a few of your close friends.  Sign ups are on the website.

Ruck Run

12 men showed up to explore the woods of the McAlpine Greenway and do some cardiovascular exercise.

The Thang:

Indian Run in formation with Flag, Team Weight up front. About a half mile.

Packs off. Indian Run – packs were passed back, when last man had 2 packs (one for each hand) he sprinted to the front. Flag up front, Team Weight passed back with all the packs. About a half mile.

Packs-on scramble. 10 seconds to get any pack on. I think only Strange Brew ended up with his own pack.

Indian Run. The line did lunges, the runner did the Karyoke. Quarter mile?

Team option: Creek or Rock pile. Everyone but Dolphin chose the Rock Pile.

Pick up rocks. One coupon per man.

Run (about a mile of this). Alternated between rocks overhead and Rocks held out in front of you – on top of man’s pack in front of you (tight formation required).

Coupon drop. Team penalty – no straps. 2 hands – one for pack, one for rock.

Ditch rocks, wear packs. Team sprint to the finish line – sub 4 minute goal for probably 3/8 of a mile. We did it in roughly 2+ minutes.


Triple claps to Simba and Rapunzel for showing today. They didn’t know what they were getting into, and even had to have the GoRuck Challenge explained to them, but still hung tough with the team. Great job! YHC overheard more than one guy at the end volunteering their pack if either wanted to try one out on their own back.

Dolphin likes to be wet, but alas we skipped the creeky tunnel this morning. Truth-be-told, even if we went in the water, we were still going to be picking up those rocks.

There is so much fun to be had out there in the woods. We didn’t even make it up the big hill this morning. I’ve got lots left over for next week.

Next week we will have one more GoRuck style workout at the Devil’s Turn, then turn our attention to training for the Spartan and Mud Run Races. #speedwork

Remember, GoRuck brothers, No Morrow Mountain excursion this weekend. Look for a Ruck-friendly workout in your own neighborhood.

Death Valley

Posted by Callaway from Header….

The Thang:

Run to the end of the parking lot and circled up Side straddle hop X 25 Mountain climbers X 25 Merkin X 25 Squats X 25

Run to the football track and do 1 lap at 75% speed with 5 burpees at every corner

Jog to goal line and do (4) 50 yrd sprints (forward, karaoke, Karaoke,


Rinse and repeat

Run 1 lap around football track at 75% speed with 5 burpees at every corner

Jog to baseball fields and split up into 3 groups Group 1 – 50 merkins with feet up on railing Group 2 – 50 (25 each leg) 1 legged lunges on bleachers Group 3 – 50 LBC’s

Everyone rotates through each station

Rinse and repeat

Jog back to football field jumping up and doing “headers” every 20 yrds.

Run 1 lap around football track at 75% speed with 5 burpees at every corner

Line up on goal line of football field and split up into 3 groups Group 1 – Suicide sprints Group 2 – Russian twists Group 3 – LBC’s

Everyone rotates when suicide sprints are finished Rinse and repeat 2 more times

Run back to parking lot….

Naked Moleskin:

DV continues to grow. 41 pax today is the new high water mark. Welcome to the three FNG’s

Kudos to a few of the pax who are embracing the F3 spirit and getting after it hard – Strange Brew, Coal Miners Daughter and Thin Crust. Keep it up, boys!


Skunk in a Bag

The Skunk of Many Stripes added another today.  Diamondhead?  Stole it.  Combine?  Unrepentant ripoff.  CORE?  Skunkified it.  Today, we ripped a page from the WIB.  You want to know why Skunk Works is on a Tuesday?  Because so is the WIB.


  • SSH x30
  • Mountain Climbers x 30



Run ring road around church (approx. 0.6 mi.)

All Evolutions on your own (OYO), good form, modify as required


  • 10 burpees / 50 2-handed swings
  • 20 burpess / 40 2-handed swings
  • 30 burpees / 30 2-handed swings
  • 20 burpees / 40 2-handed swings
  • 10 burpees / 50 2-handed swings


  • 10 burpees / 20 goblet squats
  • 15 burpees / 15 goblet squats
  • 20 burpees / 10 goblet squats
  • 15 burpees / 15 goblet squats
  • 10 burpees / 20 goblet squats


  • 10 burpees / 20 Russian twists
  • 15 burpees / 15 Russian twists
  • 20 burpees / 10 Russian twists
  • 15 burpees / 15 Russian twists
  • 10 burpees / 20 Russian twists


  • 1-legged low flutter x 10
  • Other-legged low flutter
  • LBC x 20 (uncrossed feet, feet above knees)




  • Chatter index today registered at 0.0.  The only words from the gloom were, “You should have preblasted this.”   Aye, but no one would have come.
  • If you were so inclined today (and did the exercises as listed), you completed: 230 burpees, 210 2-handed swings, 80 goblet squats, and 80 Russian twists. Sadly we didn’t have time for the finishing lap back around the church, leaving the workout asymmetric.  #Bothersome.
  • Bananas is a head locking machine.  Only three or four weeks removed from his first post and he’s EHd 5 or 6 guys so far, maybe more.  He had so many in the #ClownCar today that one had to ride in the hatch.
  • A couple of words to the two FNGs today, Dickies and Geraldo:  It’s understandable if you never talk to Bananas again.  Find forgiveness in your heart; he didn’t know what he was subjecting you to.  The good news is (when you can move again) it will become easier as you get stronger.  #IceBath.  #Ibuprofen
  • T-Claps to Wanker [not drinking that Bulldog [sic] Kool-Aid anymore…deal with it].  One tough sum-beech and a burpee beast.  One of very few who made it all the way through unmodified.  Even had to give him an extra ration of burpees to keep him busy.  #shortguyburpeeadvantage
  • Hats off to everyone for sticking with it, modified or not.  The WIB-style format is a “you against you” test of mental and physical toughness.  T-Claps.


  • Sign up for Spartan Sprint (website).
  • Pay for your bus ticket and sundries (website).
  • HDHH South at Dakotas tomorrow night:  1800-1930.

Superbowl Monday

17 men gathered this morning to work-off Sunday evening’s chicken wings, pizza, nachos and beer.

The Thang – Joker on Q

– Warm up lap

-Squats X40

-IW X40

-SSH X40

-Pull ups X10; dips X20… rinse repeat for three sets

-Starfish run, with 20 merkins, 20 CDD, 20 squats, 20 LBCs, and 10 burpees, respectively

-20 merkins; followed by 20 merkins; followed by 10 merkins

-Partner carry 40 yards; flapjack

The Thang – Smash on Q

-Run 40 yards; merkins

-Run 40 yards; mountain climbers

-Run 40 yards; jumping lunge

-Run 40 yards; LBC

-People’s Chair

-Wall merkins

-Mountain climbers

-Peter Parker

-Merkin with right foot near right hand; switch

-Parking lot sprint to finish



-Triple claps for Smash… taking the Q for the first time.

-Apparently Cottontail wasn’t sufficiently smoked after today’s workout, as I noticed him banging out a few extra reps post-COT.  This must be how he is training for his first Q experience this coming Saturday.

-Young Love and Coal Miner’s Daughter… impressive work guys… you’ve become regulars for sure. 

-Turkey Leg has taken the “suzy chapstick” moniker from YHC… as I’ve taken enough abuse from Tiger Rag on my headband that I’ve retired it [at least for now]. 

-YHC had a strange feeling today when I felt like I had forgotten how to count the right way.. kind of like the way that golfers sometimes mysteriously lose their swings.

Is This Skunk Works Or The Rock?


Badge of Honor – Orange Puddle, We were taught a great lesson by a very brave and strong young man today – Don’t drink Orange Juice before an F3 Workout!

25 Pax posted in the brisk, frosty gloom for a little WIB Circuit and Bug Eater’s virgo Q.  Common words as the pax exited their vehicles and saw the coupons YHC had brought was “Am I at Skunk Works or is this The Rock?”

The Thang:

Mall Cop Lead

Ask for volunteers to grab the 8 Kettle Bells and the 85 lb. heavy bag, grab the shovel flag, and head accross the parking lot to the soccer pitches for COP:

SSH x 30

Imperial Walkers x 20


Divide into 7 groups of 4 for a WIB (Workout In A Bag) Circuit for the next 28 minutes straight.

WIB Circuit:  Teams line up in a single file line, Pax 1 sprint 300 yds (to the fence and back), Pax 2 perform the Kettle Bell Exercise Called for that round, Pax 3 & 4 perform the exercises called. 

Round 1) Sprints / 2 Hand Kettle Bell Swings / Exercises: Merkins, Carolina DD, LBC, Squats

Round 2) Sprints / 1 Arm Kettle Bell Swings alternating arms as Pax 1 turns back at fence during sprint / Exercises: Peter Parker, Parker Peter, Merkins, Burpees

Round 3) Sprints /Goblet Squats / Exercises: Lost count about this point but believe it was Burpees, Burpees, Merkins, Squats

In addition: Team 1 started with the 85 lb Heavy Bag and each Pax took a turn throwing the bag over their shoulder for 10 squats, run up the Jaccobs Ladder Hill, 10 more squats, run down hill and pass to the next pax.


Bug Eater Lead:

 Run to Yellow man (haha)

Partner carry

15 count Carolina dry dock

80-Yard Partner sprint / side straddle hops

20 count Merkin

80-Yard Partner sprint relay

20 count merkin

Plankorama: Regular, Right Arm High, Left Arm High, Regular

40-yard bear crawl / 40 yard crab walk, Rinse and Repeato!

1/2 mile Indian run around church

5 North Face climbers / merkin ladder


Run it out back to home base for COT



T-Claps to Bug Eater for his Virgo Q and for posting for the 4:00 am GoRuck training at the Stonehenge site with Dolphin and then coming to dish out some pain and endure The Rock!


YHC must have heard about 23 times prior to launch today, “Is this Skunk Works or The Rock, what you got up your sleaves today Mall Cop?”  YHC thought I would mix it up today with a little WIB Circuit for the first 30 min, and with Bug Eaters relays, Indian Run, and climbing North Face 5 times many of us were pretty much spent.  Great work by all the pax today and T-Claps to Stone Cold, 49er, and Donkey Kong for sporting their Rucks and to Big League Chew for doning the new weight vest!


The picture at the top is a public service announcement to all by a very strong and brave Sand  Bar.  He was pushing and leading the pax on so many exercises that he pushed his OJ right out as well.  This is nothing to be ashamed about and is a Badge of Honor Sand Bar.  Thank you for coming out with your old man almost every week and showing us all how to put forth 100% effort.  You sir are an animal and if you keep this up you’ll be the biggest beast on the soccer pitch and the football field!


It was great to have an FNG from out of town Cosmo (Brad Bloom) who is the executive and editor of Faith and Fitness magazine.  You did great and look like you are already in a position to start up our next location of F3 up in Chesapeake, VA.   It was also great to have Malko come down for our weekly #downPAINment. 


Announcements -1)  The official registration for the Spartan Sprint is now up on the web site.  Please read through the artice and go ahead and officially register you and your EH’s from when we soft committed back in the fall.  YHC committed for several spots back in the fall so if you didn’t then or have started F3 over the last couple of months and would like to run the Spartan Sprint please send me a Twitter DM or talk to me at the next workout.

2) The new F3 Race Jersey design is up on the website and there is an area for a soft commit if you want to order one.  This is important so the Gear Team can know how many to request from the vendor.  Please select your style and size when you make your soft commit.

Until next time!  Aye!

Frozenhood – Man in Tights

If Robinhood were in the PAX he'd be wearing them too.

18 men gathered for the frozen fiesta this morning at Area 51.  Temps in the low 20’s but the sun was shining so it was time to steal from the rich and make some downPAINments to the PAX.

The Thang:

Crab Cake QIC

walking lunges the entire length of the parking lot (ouch)

walking lunges all the way back, (dagger!)

circle up,

SSH x21

IW x21

Merkin x21

LBC x 21

Rock Climber x 21

Mosey to tire wall

jump over tire and back x 20

jump over tire sise to side x 20

decline merkins x 20 AKA Derkins!

mosey to circle of benches in the woods & divide into 2 groups

group 1: dips on the benches as we realize the Tickler is wearing man tights without shorts – cardinal sin, more on that later

group 2: run to top of steps, frogger ladder with merkins from 5 down to 1, circle field and meet back with grouyp

SWITCH and repeato

next, same 2 groups

group 1: step ups on benches

group 2 froger lader, same as before then circle field and all meet up

mosey to wall for peoples chair

decline merkins on curb x 20

rinse and repeat

Far Side QIC

indian run around field finish at rock pile then grab your favorite boulder

4 man teams line up in the end zone.

1 man sprints to 50 while the other three excersize, when he returns, the next man runs (with boulder) and other 3 guys excerzise in this order:

squats, merkins, lunges, carolina dry docks.

circle up at thre 50 yd line for the ring of fire

1 man shouts out an excersize for the rest of the circle to do while he runs around the outside of the circle

when he returns the man to his right shouts out a different excersize and runs the circle, repeat until everyone goes

return boulder, liine up in end zone

50 yd sprint, 10 merkins, back run 50 yds, 15 merkins, 100 yd sprint 20 merkiins

200 yd sprint (end zone to end zone)

circle for mary

dolly x20

rosalita x20

flutter x20

bicyle x20


No doubt that the Tickler stole the show with his wife’s jazzercize tights.  These mantyhose would have been perectly acceptable had he been wearing shorts over them.  But he wasn’t. Tickler’s surgical gloves left the PAX with more questions but I think they felt some were better left unanswered.  Hats off Tickler!  Wardrobe well done.  Other notables: FNG Thomas Fennel (Jordache) worked out in a pair of vintage Jordache jeans and managed to keep them grass stain free, wouldn’t you?  Those things are  collector items.  Welcome, Jordache, hope to see you back soon brother!  Cotton Tail tortured the ring of fire with his high knees and butt kicks as he slow trotted around, Nicely done.  Overall, lots of chatter from the group, probably everyone trying to keep their faces from freezing.  Great job Crabcake on his second Q – the downPAINments were well received.


Bring your elbow pads 
Great turnout for the second helping of Kevlar at Covenenant Day School with over 30 pax in attendance and 3 FNG’s. The temperatures were almost tropical compared to last week’s Arctic blast.
Mosey over to church lot after a couple of extra laps waiting for stragglers:
SSH x 25
IW x 25
MC x 25
Mosey over to hill:
Lots of energy buzzing around CDS this morning as Kevlar saw a record attendance on a Friday F3 Area 51 workout. Some nerves were jingling as Bulldog laid enough cones to out to land a Boeing on the soccer field. The mosey to the church was interupted by Header and one other who must have hit snooze in the fartsack one too many times. Pax were made painfully aware that as tough as Tiger Rag appears to be by sporting short sleeves in cold weather his elbows are not as legendary. TR refused to choke it on the cement and remained in plank therefore will be rewarded with some Lubriderm and a set of elbow pads for next weeks endevours.
Great seeing the CMPD represented with FNG Brent Stanze nicknamed Wilbur taking some time away from fighting crime and keeping the peace within the pax.
Good work by all and have a great weekend!
ANNOUNCEMENTS: All Saturday workouts as planned with the Rock, Stonehenge, and Area 51 as scheduled. Keep the Shore in your prayers as well as Short Sale as we pray he bounces back quickly. Both lads are missed.


GoRuck Gear Test #2- Pepper Pots & A Bed Post

9 members of 1st F and 2 committed runners posted in the dark and muddy gloom for another taste of good livin.

The Thang:

-Ray Charles and The Drill posted at 0515 for their weekly 5 to 6 miler while 49er, Stone Cold and Far Side went for a 1.5 mile warm up run with rucks.

-The full GoRuck PAX launched at 0530 and immediately picked up the first 3 coupons for the day provided by the bridge overpass retaining wall.  Adult size boulders and one in particular was a nice and healthy beauty (DK sure can pick em!).

-The creek.. she was a rage’n thanks to last night’s down pour.   Water level was very high and white caps abundant.  So a creek crossing with bricks tied to our backs was unanimously ruled out.  No doubt there would have been an under water pain station had The Shore (praying for you brother) been Q. 

-Up hill trek in formation picking up another coupon, lop sided tree trunk (one end very heavy with spikes, the other much lighter) and a bed post (Woody).. I think someone must have needed it for their 3 legged bed at home.

-Pain stations at muddy field lead first by Donkey Kong: caterpillar push ups (crowd pleaser! ) and Dollys.  Then Strange Brew: partner pepper pots (Canadian for “he sees me’s”) and army crawl.

-Trek in formation back to parking lot delivering coupons back to their homes; with the exception of Woody. 3.5 miles covered.


-A lot more chatter this morning from the PAX; I am guessing due to the exhilaration of knowing that we would not be getting in the water.  Mother was that water cold last week!

-Pepper pots are much more enjoyable on a wet muddy field.  Far Side wins the award for the longest belly slide.

-Did I actually hear Brew say that he was in the very elite Canadian Army….or was that a raccoon growling in the woods???

-Shout out to Schedule C for making the long trip from north Charlotte for the 2nd week in a row at the crack of dawn.



-Dolphin is Q’ing an early morning GoRuck workout this Saturday.  Meet at the Greenway parking lot off of Johnston Rd near Ballantyne located at the bridge just down from the Red Robin.  This is NOT the entrance off of Hwy 51.  Meet at 0420; launch at 0430. This will be a good dress rehearsal for the challenge so dress and prepare accordingly.  COT will be at 0600 so you will have time to double up and make your usual Saturday workout after.

-Marrow Mountain GoRuck workout (4 hours)  this Sunday.  Meet at The Rock (Calvary Church) Sunday at 0600 if you want to carpool.