Author Archive Das Boot

PSA: Not all professions are the same

10 PAX meet at Timekeeper after Swift and Bagpipe to continue discussing the current read: Range by David Epstein. Not to be confused with Theo Epstein, Jeffrey Epstein or Juan Epstein.

Good read so far with good discussion each week — applications for your career, raising children, not burying yourself in one track and not getting down if you aren’t quite where you expected. This chapter contained good words on breakthrough glitter, GameBoy and the eroticism box. (Betcha wish you were there for that one, huh?)

But the most important thing learned this week is that as often as you can you should you should never refer to Tiger Rag as an architect. YHC used the term architecture and and that was to close — he’s an engineer. Apparently, there’s a difference? I’ve never seen him driving a train.  After the red in those eyes, though, YHC will consider returning to TK in a couple of months.

The mumblechatter was electric!

Five PAX headed to The Body Shop for a blessed break in the weather, doing some gloomy work before work.


Mosey up the main road

  • Imperial Walker
  • Moroccan Night Club
  • Floyd Mayweather
  • Mountain climber

Mosey to the back of the school and grab a rock for…


Ladder of exercises:

  • 10 curls, then run a little up the parking lot
  • Squats 5x, Run back to start, 10 curls
  • Run, 5x squats, run father for 5x Superman, back to start for curls
  • Repeat exercises, run farther to 5x heels to heaven, back to start for curls
  • Repeat, run farther and do 5x Mike Tysons, return to start

Repeat for 10x switching curls for tricep extensions, 15x with curls and then do one full set of 20x that begins with 20x triceps and 20x curls

Return to COT for American Hammers.


No Q-jack this week and YHC kept control of the garage, though there was pre-refusal at the idea of going up to 25x Mike Tysons. The Panthers play tonight but the closest the conversation came to that was the upcoming App State game — and not a single PAX in attendance has any ties to App.

At some point early on the conversation went to electric vehicles. It became evident that none of the PAX present are ASE-certified mechanics or skilled electrical engineers, but it was agreed by all that fast, powerful cars are fun. One has a new Tesla which he is enjoying — though apparently his father is trying to guilt him into letting him have it — and one is now on the (expectedly long) waiting list for a Rivian SUV.

Kudos to McGee for making it out after IPC Week 3 and The Wobble. It’s good to see J-Woww making the trip up north for the second week in a row and we’re all excited for the day he rolls up with fart sounds for a horn. Great actors can cry on cue, Noonan can sweat on cue. As in, two minutes into a workout. And One Star was busting through curls like an SEC lineman bowling over an Ivy League D-line. He might have experience on one side of that.


  • Commitment is closed this Saturday for the Christ Closet giveaway
  • Go to the Christ’s Closet event in Monroe or volunteer Friday — it will be awesome
  • Waxhaw cookout on Sunday, October 2 4-6:30 PM at Five Stones
  • SOB Blood drive on October 29 in Matthews

Playing footsie on my ball

YHC loves a good theme for a workout and with this being the first day of school for Union County and the CMS first day coming up this week, it was a great opportunity for a back-to-school themed workout.  But YHC wasn’t feeling inspired Sunday night, so the theme didn’t happen and 16 PAX at Firestarter had a regular ole workout and the closest thing to back to school was an inordinate amount of time spent in the Target parking lot.


  • Hillbillies
  • Goofballs
  • Squats
  • Sumo squats
  • Baryshnikov squats
  • Moroccan Night Clubs
  • About 9 burpees thrown in for added fun



Mosey to the Old Navy for a round of California Killers:

  • 10 calf raises
    • 10 hops
      • 10 jumps in place extending legs sideways
        • 10 SSH with arms going halfway up
          • 10 SSH
        • 10 halfway SSH
      • 10 jumps
    • 10 hops
  • 10 calf raises

Mosey to the Target parking lot and split into 4 groups of 4 PAX for an exercise followed by a run to the unlit section of the lot for 10x Mike Tysons

  • Station 1: 50x air jabs
    • Tysons
  • Station 2: feet on the giant Target ball and hand shuffle around in unison
    • Tysons
  • Station 3: 25x merkins
    • Tysons
  • Station 4: 20x Bombjacks
    • Tysons


Similar group work, but this time using the shopping cart returns

  • 10 wide-arm supines
  • 10 each leg Captain Morgans
  • 10 wide-arm supines
  • 10 each leg Captain Morgans
  • 20x Heels to Heaven


Head back to COT



Apparently some guys aren’t fans of the fun exercises from the depths of the exicon, such as Goof Balls.  That led to some OYO burpees because YHC thought the refusnik crowd might like those more.  Not so much.  Baryshnikov squats?  Also, not huge fans.  That eventually led to 80 Mike Tysons that were not originally on the weinke.

YHC’s M suggested the Killers, which was a warm-up exercise she learned in middle school in California.  This move had not been pre-tested so it was a bit of a stretch, but after YHC’s last Q at Firestarter and the great praise for a few hundred calf raises, there needed to be more calf raisin’.  The final set of 10 raises was a beast and you felt it — not sure how that wasn’t considered cruel and unusual in the Golden State when middle schoolers were forced to do it regularly.  Definitely one to keep in the quiver.

The group work was fun and there was plenty of mumblechatter going on — the ridiculous number of Tysons, the difficulty of maneuvering on the Target ball (“There’s too much playing footsie with me on the ball!”), the logistics of the shopping cart returns.  But the most came from the unintended gaseous release aided by the many Mike Tysons — apparently, someone tortured another group more than 15 feet away with a creeping plume of death that showed signs of a healthy amount of protein and perhaps liquor consumed within the previous 12 hours.  While Wingman suffered more than a Site Q should on that one, CPR was not needed.



  • Blood drive Oct 29 in Matthews — see Mighty Mite
  • Last Call moving back to 0532 on Fridays

Grab a ball to start your day

The hype was posted that there would be playing with balls at The Body Shop and 2 site FNGs responded excitedly, along with some familiar faces for a solid group of 6 PAX.


Mosey and then…

  • Hillbillies 19x IC
  • Squats 19x IC
  • Newton’s Cradle 19x IC
  • Moroccan Night Squats 19x IC


Long mosey around the school, picking up an extra couple of balls along the way and head to the track, where each PAX grabs a sports ball (soccer, basketball, generally semi-inflated).

Variations of merkins around the track, with one type 10x at each corner

  • Staggered, right hand on ball
  • Staggered, left hand on ball
  • Both hands on ball
  • Feet on ball, hands on ground


Febreze of 2 Big Boys + 10 air presses while holding a V, then 4+20, then 6+30

Another round of merkins on the track in the opposite direction


Mosey around back of the school with ball in hand

At the parking lot, do an ab exercise x 25 OYO with the ball between knees, then run the length of the lot for 20 baby dips on the curb

  • LBCs
  • Big Boys
  • Heels to Heaven

Complete the Febreze at 8+40 and 10+50

Mosey back to return the balls, then finish with a merkin circle of Dive Bomber merkins.



YHC was excited to arrive at The Body Shop to see some unfamiliar cars.  Sweetwater showed up on a recon mission for a future Q — which the Wax PAX are already abuzz about.  Not sure why, maybe it’s just the rumors of his hard weinke?  The Bushwood crew has recently brought El Toro out of the woodwork and he was very excited to play with balls this morning and is welcome back anytime.  Smuggler proved so fast at taking advantage of the facilities at Smuggler’s Cove that the PAX couldn’t even get to it quick enough to bang on the walls and frighten him a bit.  We were also happy that he didn’t have to lose a shirt at a workout for the second day in a row.  After a full day on the road, Tanyatine brought plenty of pent-up energy to the workout and even had the wherewithal to grab a pump from his car and inflate some of the under-inflated balls.  True service.  And Big Ben celebrated a not-yet-respectful birthday this week and doesn’t get why everyone wants him to offer up a birthday Q or some ridiculous number of burpees (or dive bomber merkins here) — it’s just out of love and respect, man, not at all because there’s an open slot on the calendar.

The mumblechatter was good, the effort was strong, YHC is writing the backblast too late to remember the details, so come out to the next edition of The Body Shop where there may be less playing with balls — or more, who knows?



  • Sign up for the Iron PAX Challenge
  • SOB Blood Drive Oct 29


Men of Waxhaw 2nd F Lunch Braintrust

4 PAX gathered, solved world hunger and the Afghanistan situation, discussed string theory and made fart jokes. What did you do during lunch?


The region’s 2nd F Q’s are bumping the frequency up to twice a month beginning September so come back for more.

Also, we had to post this to get Carb Load credit because he’s getting crap from guys about not coming out — at least his is due to injury. Maybe we’ll see Hooch soon.

Avoiding the floods

Four PAX converged on Kohl’s for some solid Marvin Miles and soaking up the lovely humid atmosphere after storms. Route had to be annotated to avoid flooded paths, but easy come, easy go. All in a morning’s work.

Clanking balls on my desk


“Go North, young man!” Was that the quote? The direction may be of, but in any case YHC followed Point Break’s invite to Q the Anvil and headed north of 485 on a fine and not wet Wednesday morning. The “not a professional” component of the disclaimer soon became evident.



Mosey around the outer rim of the parking lot, stopping fit a few exercises.

  • Hillbillies 18x IC
  • Squats 18x IC
  • Baryshnikov squats 18x IC
  • Newton’s Cradle 18x IC
  • Moroccan night club sumo squats 18x IC


Mosey to the rock pile on 51 and grab a running rock, one that you can handle with one hand. Head back to the parking lot.

One PAX will run, burpee and return as timer while others exercise… While planking, grab the rock and extend it above. 4 sets of this then Omaha switch to do a merkin and slide the rock to one side, merkin slide it back. 4 sets of that.

Repeat the format but with an an exercise called by the runner.

Next fun activity… Set rocks in every other parking space, plank walk sideways to rock then run to far island, run back to start, plank walk to second rock, run to far island and so on.

Return rocks.

Run back to COT stopping once for 20x gorilla humpers.



Newton’s Cradle is the official name of the exercise on the exicon, but how many people outside of a buyer at Brookstone or Sharper Image would know that name? The PAX knew it when described and offered up their own names that made it more recognizable: desk ball thing, ball clacker, ball clanker on my desk, balls smasher. Rebranding effort is needed.

The rock extensions did not go as planned. Future Qs, be warned that the rocks at Anvil are not single-handed rocks! Probably a good thing for lifting. That resulted in the Omaha midway through the first exercise. Also, of your in the parking lot and see repeated white streaks in a few spaces, that’s us. Amazingly some rocks don’t leave marks while Point Break’s merited the question, “Is your rock covered in chalk?”

Excellent work this morning by PAX in spite of the Q. Good luck to those getting kids off to college and school, and come on down to Western Union County sometime. And for anyone wondering, the significance of the 18x was just the date, nothing more.



Blood drive October 29

SOB Q school this Saturday at da Vinci

Detour not needed

Earlier in the week Smuggler was coerced into Q’ing The Body Shop by someone at Bushwood. Smuggler, fresh off a whirlwind easy cost trip, was game — apparently the coercer was not and didn’t show. String workout — as expected — by the Q and to everyone’s surprise, he didn’t even need to take advantage of Smuggler’s Notch, the eponymous on-site port-a-potty. But the biggest deal of the day was Orchid bringing his 2.0 out bright and early. A gamer, the FNG walked away with the name Sonic even though the hedgehog friend is not in his usual gaming rotation — but he did at least recognize that name more than others suggested such as Frogger, Pitfall, Q-Bert and Pong. After a few minutes of old guys getting lost in remembering games we grew up on, we had to cut it off and just name him Sonic.

Obscure Sports Quarterly and no pocketful of kryptonite

Lex Luthor took the reins of The Body Shop, bringing his out-of-this-world, er, county workout down to unincorporated Waxhaw. As much as the memes called for it, thankfully, there were no Spin Doctors references or tunes, which could bring back memories of YHC’s most regrettable concert ever. Please forgive the 16 year old who finally got permission to drive to the big city of Raleigh.


Solid workout from Lex and the PAX discussed pertinent topics of the day while playing mind games over suicides: used cars, Rocky Mountains travel and the most recent issues of Obscure Sports Quarterly.

Cue NBC Olympic music

Four PAX arrived at the bar school for Last Call to the same number of fans at the Tokyo Opening Ceremonies going on at that same time.  But Last Call had a shovel flag!  The shovel flag was the flag from The Body Shop, but that doesn’t matter.  Flag was planted, DICCS provided and men ran off.



  • Hillbillies x 10 IC
  • Plank Jacks x 10 IC
  • Newton’s Cradle x 10 IC
  • Nancy Kerrigan x 10 each leg IC



Mosey to the main high school driveway

  • Run the drive stopping at each of 7 lights for 5x Olympic Ring Merkins (hand-release and make circles like a snow angel)

There was a gifted pile of rocks at the roundabout!  Grab a rock and carry it, stop along the way for some merkins on rocks.

Head to the benches between the tennis courts and find a special place under a bench

  • Supine pull-ups underhand grip (chin-ups) x 10 OYO
  • Supine pull-ups overhand grip x 10 OYO
  • Stagger with one hand over and one under x 10 OYO
  • Flapjack the stagger 1x 10 OYO
  • Get up for 10 dips
  • Straddle bench hops over the bench, bent over holding on x 10
  • Run around one set of courts

Repeat for a total of 4 sets

With the rocks at the benches

  • Make an ‘X’ 20 IC
  • Chest flies x 25 OYO
  • Michael Phelps swimmer moves x 20 IC
  • Captain Morgans x 20 each leg

Run to the school entrance for 5 O-Ring Merkins

Return and repeat

On the second round, return to the back entrance with rocks for 6 O-Ring merkins with rocks in hand.

Mosey to COT stopping for 20 Dragonflies at the HS side entrance.



YHC usually has a theme for the workout.  This theme began as “Reuse, Recycle, Reduce” because YHC was recycling a weinke used at Last Call in June.  After some mumblechatter about the Olympics during the opening mosey and YHC calling the Nancy Kerrigan, Posse put together that the theme was around the Olympics.  Yes, of course!  T-merkins because Olympic Ring merkins, the Michael Phelps was added to the invisi-weinke, Dragonflies were renamed Greg Louganis and monkey humpers were scratched because… monkeys at the Olympics?  A more Olympic-centric list of exercises would have worked well.

  • J-Woww was a suprise after a comment made earlier in the week at Bushwood about “…some weird Das Boot exercise.”  But as always, he tore it up throughout, though his weakness may be wet grass.
  • Posse discovered the theme unknown even to the Q and showed that he secretly loves supines under the tennis court benches.  Something about great memories under benches.
  • Honeycomb showed great form on the bench hops and the O-merkins, until rocks were added where it became more of a scrape/drag effort.


Good times at Marvin and everyone was surprised, nay utterly baffled, that there was not a Site Q present.  But stranger things have happened.  Good conversation afterwards also, although being past Last Call, there were no beverages to be had.