Author Archive Das Boot


DATE: 2022-11-22 AO: _Sob Q: das_boot PAX: das_boot, ToeJam, Chopper, frehleys_comet, Olaf, tagalong FNGs: None COUNT: 6 6 PAX headed to Bagpipe with stranger math ahead but ended up ditching that for some time on the putting green.
WARMUP: Mosey to the bull ring for some odd exercises and light sprints. Hillbillies, goofballs, Moroccan night club.
THE THANG: Go around the north side of the buildings and at each intersection, do a number of exercises based on the Fibonacci sequence: 0,1,1,2,3,5,8,13,21.
Three rounds included T-merkins, start jumps and alternating jump lunges.
Then we found there were putters on the green and everyone grabbed a putter and a ball and went for a hole. Number of strokes equaled the reps of the exercise to do. Burpees, squats, side lunges.
Head back to COT.
MOLESKINE: There were no good anniversaries or special days on November 22 so YHC opted for celebrating Fibonacci Day which is the 23rd. That makes for strange math but the reps add up quickly once it’s explained, then explained again. And maybe a third time for good measure. We got 54 T-merkins in which is a strong number for the inner shoulder blades and 33 of the other exercises.
YHC had a few minutes to kill and ended up back best three putting green when we noticed that they do have the putters out again. After crazy math, some time on the green was welcomed — even if it was in the dark — and made for some good laughs and a first-ever workout experience for some longtimers.
It was good to lead some SOBs again even if we didn’t have Rousey’s girls on hand.

No one wants to be here?

YHC rolled up at The Brave to find a trio of PAX wondering wondering if they needed a substi-site-Q. No fear!


We headed towards Endhaven and did a Build-a-Webb at the light poles with T-merkins and jump lunges along the way, at a 1:2 ratio. Once we hit 10:20, we laddered down and made it to 6:12.  Bear crawl over parts of the overpass, head to the school for a modified triple nickel with pull-ups and dips. We did some Paula Abdul on the way back and headed on the golf course (RIP) until Wingman informed me the construction would hinder our progress. Merkin clock, return to COT.


Through multiple comments during the workout, it sounds like none of the four went to bed Thursday night itching to get up at 0500 and head to a workout.  Do why were we there?  Some of it was obligation, maybe some guilt, and some internal drive. Whatever it was, we all left good with the decision to post and stronger for posting.  Great work Doc McStuffins, Wingman and Midriff — YHC’s Friday was much better for this.

Totally selfish Q

YHC spent March rolling through Flipper’s annual March Madness challenge and when the final week rolled around, the task was 300 merkins, 50 pull-ups, 50 starfish crunches and 5 minutes of plank each day. The goal was to work a good chunk of that into the Weinke in order to avoid a second workout later to complete it. (At this point, it is requisite to mention that the author of said Challenge had long since bailed on it this season, dropping before Kentucky even knew what a St. Peter’s Peacock was.)


Mosey to the Synchrony parking lot for…

  • Merkins
  • Sprinkler Planks
  • Squats
  • Moroccan night clubs
    • With squats



  • 8x Suicides to the parking lot lines for 5 T-merkins, return for 5 starfish crunches
  • 4x (3x Bonnie Blairs then run to the parking lot lines for 5 merkins, backpedal to start)
  • 3x raccoon walk followed by 5 merkins

Mosey back to near COT for 3x wall jumps across from COT, run to Sabor for 5 merkins



As noted, it was a selfish Q designed to hit a good chunk of the challenge. Unfortunately, as often happens when focused of self, stupidity happens. YHC miscounted the crunches and only hit 40 instead of 50.  We did, however, get half of the merkins and plenty of added pain thanks to the Bonnie Blairs.

Solid mumblechatter as YHC had to explain what a starfish crunch looked like and how raccoons walk in a straight line. There was also good discussion as to what to call the long lines in the parking lot. YHC called them vertical and was soon corrected and informed that none of the lines were vertically leaving the parking lot and pointing skyward. Perpendicular was the desired word, but someone suggested longitudinal and that won the day. Good use of a 5 syllable word, guys!

It was YHC’s VQ at Bagpipe after all these years and it is a strong air with plenty of options and a great crew of PAX, to boot.

What happened to Rousey and life coaching from Lex

YHC came in on two wheels, having hit every light in Ballantyne on the way to a fun morning at Stonehenge, and pulled a plastic create from the car to take along for the workout.  That elicited questions of its purpose: milk crate? Are we picking up trash?  Does he even have a purpose for it? Eventually it was abandoned on the ground near the rocks and that made even less sense. Time to get tired!

30-minute WARM-UP

60 merkins mixed in with running, SSH, squats, mountain climbers, something else

Mosey to the exercise equipment for mixing pull-ups with supines and squats

Head to the Lance/Campbell’s lot for 8 merkins at each of 5 lights and then 10 starfish crunches, followed by a 1-minute plank



Line up at the parking lot entrance to Bagpipe Hill for 4 round of a random number of squats or humpers then a sprint up the hill to a random marker.

To the back lot, grab rocks and the crate. Rock work while a guy pushed the crate with 2 rocks for makeshift hairburners.

Get back to COT.



It’s the first week of Flipper’s March Madness and YHC committed early Friday to knock out the 100 merkins, 10 pull-ups, 10 starfish crunches and minute plank during Stonehenge, but by the end of the day, the goal was to knock it all out before da Vinci even started. It was a challenge but we knocked it all out right at 0630 — good job, crew!

During the pull-ups there was a strange conversation about proper alignment etiquette when doing dips on the even bars. Apparently someone got too close to Rousey in the past and he felt a bit violated. With that, Lex explained that the only acceptable way to do dips on parallel bars:

“Either hole to hole or pole to pole.”

We were all educated that morning.

The sprints on Bagpipe were tough and Airwolf surprised everyone with a strong hustle on the first round. He said he laid out all out for that one, but when Tagalong wanted to win the next one, Airwolf wasn’t letting him have it easy.

With legs nice and tired, it was a great time to do hairburners.  The PAX were excited to see how the crate would be used but quickly learned that is not any easier, especially 40 minutes into a workout. The push keeps the heart rate high and the grumbling constant.

Headed back to COT and may have arrived a minute late.  YHC felt compelled to bring a good one considering the group who attend Stonehenge and at least one guy left exhausted. Great to see Spare Parts out, to see Airwolf in daylight and ahead of me in the sprints. Rousey always makes the workout a blast and Tagalong is never shirt on commentary. YHC could compliment Lex Luthor’s 100% at the workout but the wisdom he dropped trumps all. Never forget.

FTA — face to where?

February for YHC ended with a serious of questionable decisions, the first of which was to post and Q with a gimpy back. Freshman year of college, Desert Towers W Hall 7th floor had a guy whom we nicknamed Corn Cob because he walked around all the time on the balls of his feet and someone commented that he looked like he has a corncob up his butt.  YHC felt like that over the weekend thanks to a tight back and so we took off.



A series of exercises that weren’t too painful including but not limited to Hillbillies, SSH, mountain climbers, Nolan Ryans, squats and likely something else.



Head to the A1Nail Bar that has terrible signage but turned out to be appropriate for the day’s theme.

Grab a lifting rock

In plank, side shuffle 50x to the right in a counterclockwise direction around the large island.

Return to the rocks for 15x tire changers followed by 20x gas pumps.

Repeato plank shuffle clockwise, repeat rock work.

Head to the wall between the building’s and Ardrey Kell for a train of Captain Morgans while each guy rotated through with a single burpee. Alternate sides.

Return for one more set of counterclockwise plank shuffles and rock work.

Mosey back to Blakeney for some sprints and then clash with on the stairs before heading to COT.



The original intent was a celebration of the Daytona 500 by totaling 500 of the plank side shuffles but it quickly became apparent that would not happen in the allotted time and the PAX were not disappointed by that Omaha. Tire changers also elicited groans and even questioning if that exercise was allowed away from The Body Shop.

Once headed to the Captain Morgans is when the real chatter started. Some guys were a little too close to the guy in front of them and a chain of comments that should not be shared at church rolled out.

Though it was not the Q’s intent, guys noticed a similar setting and theme as we headed up the stairs for the calf raises — a little too close for comfort at times though all were glad the Frehley’s was not present to cause harm to those downwind. More chatter including faces lining up to lower body parts in an unwelcomed way.

It was good to be back at Firestarter on a Monday after a couple of months away for the Passport Challenge and apologies for the heavy shoulder work for a couple of guys with shoulder pains recently.

Listen all y’all, it’s a sabotage

I can’t stand it, Madame T planned it
I’m gonna set it straight, this Q-jackgate
I can’t stand burpees when I’m on Brave
‘Cause your fake AO ain’t all the rave
So while you sit back and go for short work
I got an hour weinke to go berzerk
Holy Nantan, it’s a mirage
I’m tellin’ y’all, it’s a sabotage

So, so, so, no plank it up when you want to recover
Came to The Brave to be a strong ugly mutha
Big Boys, merkins at ev’ry home
The weinke says to keep it on and on

Fake Brave doesn’t push you to run
No wall jumps or rows, goofballs none
You’re banking on a post that’s a mirage
Your body soon knows, it’s sabotage


The Brave is now against the wall?
Listen all y’all, it’s a sabotage
Listen all y’all, it’s a sabotage
Listen all y’all, it’s a sabotage
Listen all y’all, it’s a sabotage

I can’t stand it, Madame T planned it
Sweetwater tried to set it straight, this Q-jackgate

PAX, I still must Q when I’m in this place
Site Qs feel disgrace because you’re all in their space
Don’t be no flakes and avoid the hard post
Like Taco’s bull shot it’ll work you the most

Still want the Fake? It’s a mirage
Shortchanging the PAX, that’s sabotage


YHC had his site-VQ at The Brave scheduled for 12/3 and around 8 PM on 12/2 a post went out on Slack specifically calling for “Fake Brave” at 0530 a mile up the road from The Brave and regulars from The Brave were tagged.  Whoa! Wow! How could this be?  Mind was reeling, but The Brave must carry on. Two strong men resisted the urge for a 45-minute “Fake Brave” in favor of joining YHC for no sleep till Gibson’s.*  (*or whatever it’s now called)


Run towards the Morrison YMCA, stopping for some obligatory warm up — SSH, Goofballs, etc.

Go to Wayfair Meadow for 10x wall jumps, 20x Little Baby Dips on the curb.  Repeato for 3 sets.

Head to Briarwick for alternating exercises at driveways

  • 5x T-merkins at first house, third house, fifth, etc
  • 5x Big Boys at second, fourth, etc.

Cut through the woods and head to the YMCA parking lot for trip work:

  • One planks, one grabs his ankles for bent-over rows, third wheel does LBCs.  Alternate at each end of the parking lot

Head south to the southern roundabout on Community House

  • In plank, move counterclockwise around the circle, stopping 4x for 5 merkins each time

Head north on CH to the next roundabout

  • Same as before, but just the semicircle

Head north for another 10x wall jumps

Head back to COT with more running and one more stop for T-merkins



Friday in the gloom was time to get ill and a little Fake Brave wasn’t going to stop that.  Big props to Wild Turkey and Midriff for keeping YHC honest and making the site VQ a fun one.  Great conversation on the runs and a good time pushing each other through the wall jumps and the roundabout madness.  As fate would have it, one of the turncoats was stuck at the light at Community House as the PAX ran up.  He looked uncomfortable, some might say guilty.  The PAX debated calling exercises in front of his early 2000s Sequoia but opted for the kinder route of a few verbal taunts.


As an update, it turns out the Fake Brave was an attempt to EH a guy who might not have 4 miles in him.  YHC can respect that.  In the completely unrelated words of Adam Yauch, “Well I got to keep it going keep it going full steam/ Too sweet to be sour too nice to be mean/ On the tough guy style I’m not too keen/ To try to change the world I will plot and scheme”



PSA: Not all professions are the same

10 PAX meet at Timekeeper after Swift and Bagpipe to continue discussing the current read: Range by David Epstein. Not to be confused with Theo Epstein, Jeffrey Epstein or Juan Epstein.

Good read so far with good discussion each week — applications for your career, raising children, not burying yourself in one track and not getting down if you aren’t quite where you expected. This chapter contained good words on breakthrough glitter, GameBoy and the eroticism box. (Betcha wish you were there for that one, huh?)

But the most important thing learned this week is that as often as you can you should you should never refer to Tiger Rag as an architect. YHC used the term architecture and and that was to close — he’s an engineer. Apparently, there’s a difference? I’ve never seen him driving a train.  After the red in those eyes, though, YHC will consider returning to TK in a couple of months.

The mumblechatter was electric!

Five PAX headed to The Body Shop for a blessed break in the weather, doing some gloomy work before work.


Mosey up the main road

  • Imperial Walker
  • Moroccan Night Club
  • Floyd Mayweather
  • Mountain climber

Mosey to the back of the school and grab a rock for…


Ladder of exercises:

  • 10 curls, then run a little up the parking lot
  • Squats 5x, Run back to start, 10 curls
  • Run, 5x squats, run father for 5x Superman, back to start for curls
  • Repeat exercises, run farther to 5x heels to heaven, back to start for curls
  • Repeat, run farther and do 5x Mike Tysons, return to start

Repeat for 10x switching curls for tricep extensions, 15x with curls and then do one full set of 20x that begins with 20x triceps and 20x curls

Return to COT for American Hammers.


No Q-jack this week and YHC kept control of the garage, though there was pre-refusal at the idea of going up to 25x Mike Tysons. The Panthers play tonight but the closest the conversation came to that was the upcoming App State game — and not a single PAX in attendance has any ties to App.

At some point early on the conversation went to electric vehicles. It became evident that none of the PAX present are ASE-certified mechanics or skilled electrical engineers, but it was agreed by all that fast, powerful cars are fun. One has a new Tesla which he is enjoying — though apparently his father is trying to guilt him into letting him have it — and one is now on the (expectedly long) waiting list for a Rivian SUV.

Kudos to McGee for making it out after IPC Week 3 and The Wobble. It’s good to see J-Woww making the trip up north for the second week in a row and we’re all excited for the day he rolls up with fart sounds for a horn. Great actors can cry on cue, Noonan can sweat on cue. As in, two minutes into a workout. And One Star was busting through curls like an SEC lineman bowling over an Ivy League D-line. He might have experience on one side of that.


  • Commitment is closed this Saturday for the Christ Closet giveaway
  • Go to the Christ’s Closet event in Monroe or volunteer Friday — it will be awesome
  • Waxhaw cookout on Sunday, October 2 4-6:30 PM at Five Stones
  • SOB Blood drive on October 29 in Matthews

Playing footsie on my ball

YHC loves a good theme for a workout and with this being the first day of school for Union County and the CMS first day coming up this week, it was a great opportunity for a back-to-school themed workout.  But YHC wasn’t feeling inspired Sunday night, so the theme didn’t happen and 16 PAX at Firestarter had a regular ole workout and the closest thing to back to school was an inordinate amount of time spent in the Target parking lot.


  • Hillbillies
  • Goofballs
  • Squats
  • Sumo squats
  • Baryshnikov squats
  • Moroccan Night Clubs
  • About 9 burpees thrown in for added fun



Mosey to the Old Navy for a round of California Killers:

  • 10 calf raises
    • 10 hops
      • 10 jumps in place extending legs sideways
        • 10 SSH with arms going halfway up
          • 10 SSH
        • 10 halfway SSH
      • 10 jumps
    • 10 hops
  • 10 calf raises

Mosey to the Target parking lot and split into 4 groups of 4 PAX for an exercise followed by a run to the unlit section of the lot for 10x Mike Tysons

  • Station 1: 50x air jabs
    • Tysons
  • Station 2: feet on the giant Target ball and hand shuffle around in unison
    • Tysons
  • Station 3: 25x merkins
    • Tysons
  • Station 4: 20x Bombjacks
    • Tysons


Similar group work, but this time using the shopping cart returns

  • 10 wide-arm supines
  • 10 each leg Captain Morgans
  • 10 wide-arm supines
  • 10 each leg Captain Morgans
  • 20x Heels to Heaven


Head back to COT



Apparently some guys aren’t fans of the fun exercises from the depths of the exicon, such as Goof Balls.  That led to some OYO burpees because YHC thought the refusnik crowd might like those more.  Not so much.  Baryshnikov squats?  Also, not huge fans.  That eventually led to 80 Mike Tysons that were not originally on the weinke.

YHC’s M suggested the Killers, which was a warm-up exercise she learned in middle school in California.  This move had not been pre-tested so it was a bit of a stretch, but after YHC’s last Q at Firestarter and the great praise for a few hundred calf raises, there needed to be more calf raisin’.  The final set of 10 raises was a beast and you felt it — not sure how that wasn’t considered cruel and unusual in the Golden State when middle schoolers were forced to do it regularly.  Definitely one to keep in the quiver.

The group work was fun and there was plenty of mumblechatter going on — the ridiculous number of Tysons, the difficulty of maneuvering on the Target ball (“There’s too much playing footsie with me on the ball!”), the logistics of the shopping cart returns.  But the most came from the unintended gaseous release aided by the many Mike Tysons — apparently, someone tortured another group more than 15 feet away with a creeping plume of death that showed signs of a healthy amount of protein and perhaps liquor consumed within the previous 12 hours.  While Wingman suffered more than a Site Q should on that one, CPR was not needed.



  • Blood drive Oct 29 in Matthews — see Mighty Mite
  • Last Call moving back to 0532 on Fridays

Grab a ball to start your day

The hype was posted that there would be playing with balls at The Body Shop and 2 site FNGs responded excitedly, along with some familiar faces for a solid group of 6 PAX.


Mosey and then…

  • Hillbillies 19x IC
  • Squats 19x IC
  • Newton’s Cradle 19x IC
  • Moroccan Night Squats 19x IC


Long mosey around the school, picking up an extra couple of balls along the way and head to the track, where each PAX grabs a sports ball (soccer, basketball, generally semi-inflated).

Variations of merkins around the track, with one type 10x at each corner

  • Staggered, right hand on ball
  • Staggered, left hand on ball
  • Both hands on ball
  • Feet on ball, hands on ground


Febreze of 2 Big Boys + 10 air presses while holding a V, then 4+20, then 6+30

Another round of merkins on the track in the opposite direction


Mosey around back of the school with ball in hand

At the parking lot, do an ab exercise x 25 OYO with the ball between knees, then run the length of the lot for 20 baby dips on the curb

  • LBCs
  • Big Boys
  • Heels to Heaven

Complete the Febreze at 8+40 and 10+50

Mosey back to return the balls, then finish with a merkin circle of Dive Bomber merkins.



YHC was excited to arrive at The Body Shop to see some unfamiliar cars.  Sweetwater showed up on a recon mission for a future Q — which the Wax PAX are already abuzz about.  Not sure why, maybe it’s just the rumors of his hard weinke?  The Bushwood crew has recently brought El Toro out of the woodwork and he was very excited to play with balls this morning and is welcome back anytime.  Smuggler proved so fast at taking advantage of the facilities at Smuggler’s Cove that the PAX couldn’t even get to it quick enough to bang on the walls and frighten him a bit.  We were also happy that he didn’t have to lose a shirt at a workout for the second day in a row.  After a full day on the road, Tanyatine brought plenty of pent-up energy to the workout and even had the wherewithal to grab a pump from his car and inflate some of the under-inflated balls.  True service.  And Big Ben celebrated a not-yet-respectful birthday this week and doesn’t get why everyone wants him to offer up a birthday Q or some ridiculous number of burpees (or dive bomber merkins here) — it’s just out of love and respect, man, not at all because there’s an open slot on the calendar.

The mumblechatter was good, the effort was strong, YHC is writing the backblast too late to remember the details, so come out to the next edition of The Body Shop where there may be less playing with balls — or more, who knows?



  • Sign up for the Iron PAX Challenge
  • SOB Blood Drive Oct 29