Questionable Ball Usage

Questionable Ball Usage

Is the game of golf dying? Is it a rich, old man’s sport? How have One Star, Big Ben, Smuggler and the crew not being kicked out of the Firethorne Country Club yet? We may never know, but one thing I knew going into this Q was that I wanted to utilize as much of The Golf Club at Ballantyne Ballantyne Backyard as possible over the course of 1-hour and 4 miles. Because how many other AO’s literally have a prestigious 18-hole golf course within walking distance???

The G-O-L-F Thang

  • Split up into two teams. Each pax grabs a ball that will be used for the round. *Cue endless ball(s) jokes*
  • Mosey to teebox for first hole. Start with 5 Groiners. Team 1 chooses 1 pax to throw the ball. Once both teams throw, mosey to ball for second shot. On second shot complete 10 One-legged merkins. Mosey to ball for third called exercise – 10 Low slow squats. By this point we should be close to the green to chip on and finish with 20 Flutter kicks.
  • Penalty burpees for lost balls, # of shots over par and hitting hazards like sand traps, other pax and live animals.


  • Team 2 (Marvel, Jerry World, Frehleys and YHC) took the W coming in 2-3 strokes ahead of Team 1 (War Eagle, Point Break, Fire Hazard, Sweet Water) despite YHC’s attempt to sandbag the last whole. Literally hitting the sand trap just feet away from the 12th hole green. In the end Frehley’s took home the golden golf ball for the first annual Ballantyne Backyards Golf Extravaganza
  • Sometimes F3 workouts kick you in the face and punch you in the nuts with ruthless beatdowns (ie Wild Turkey’s “100” last week) and other times you gotta do something fun, careless and nonsensical. I had a ton of fun with this workout and know pax enjoyed this rendition of golf while working out. Too many men have abandoned healthy recreation. Worse yet even more no longer have spaces in life to enjoy recreation with other high impact men. What keeps me coming out is the fellowship and hard, but much-needed conversations that inevitably occur in the gloom.
  • This was the fastest 12 holes I’ve ever played. Seriously I cannot believe that we hit 12 holes with called exercises, while running 4 miles under an hour, with at least 8 minutes just to mosey to the course and back. Shocked that we didn’t get arrested for moving at that blazing speed. Well done.
  • Thanks War Eagle for taking the score card about 4 holes in. There was no way I’d be able to call exercises and keep the mosey at a fast clip to finish our proper round
  • T-claps to site FNG’s Point Break and Marvel. Marvel didn’t realize this was an hourlong workout when 40 minutes in he was inquiring if we would be making our way back to launch shortly. Not today my friend, not today! Point Break was icing the shoulder after crushing some drives off the tee in true Phil Mickelson style
  • “Questionable ball usage from Frehley’s Comet” – Sweet Water after FC casually swiped FH’s ball on the fairway of Hole 4. Fire Hazard and Frehley’s win the award for most dynamic duo. Fire Hazard’s errant throw on the goose-poop infested 11th hole. Both pax were in fine form.
  • During COT Jerry World recruited Frehleys to be a high school football ref and he agreed only if he could illegally influence recruits to commit to Clemson. I’ve heard of much more serious wrongdoings in the arena of SEC football. Speaking of Jerry World and football, he was slinging darts out there like Dak Prescott.

About the author

midriff author

Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x