Crazy things happened this weekend in and around the great mega state mountains of Caro-lossus. Things that highlight the S in stupid and the U & P in utterly pointless. 5 men ran 103.6 miles in, around, and out of the mountains in our beautiful mega state. 4 of the men were smart enough to rent a swagger wagon, 3 of them went shirtless at some point, 2 of them covered over a combined 50 miles of that distance, and 1 of them did all their running solo.
This weekend was all about Weird Mountain Stuff.
Start with how Midriff decided to run all of South Mountain. By himself. With no shirt on and taking selfies. Which is awesome BTW. (Disclaimer: the running part of course, jury’s still out on the selfies in the woods) Huge shout-out to Midriff, humble and easy-going in the gloom, but don’t be fooled. Dude is legit. Never done a 50K before? Not a problem. All those “runners” suddenly found something better to do? Their loss. His M was in pre-labor for 10 days? Alright he can’t beat that … yet, but this was a strong second.
In comparison, 4 other men did a slightly less impressive thing. They ran from Asheville NC to Greenville SC in a day. Also known as the Ville to Ville Craft Beer Relay. 70.6 miles from Highland Brewing to Hampton Station. The race is a relay style format with 12 legs. Teams of 6, 4, and 3 are allowed. You accountant types can calculate the square root of who gives a rat’s @$$ to determine how the legs and mileage breakdown. Weather was a fine spring day, no rain, lots of sun, and all the bad clothing decisions you’d expect from people who spent a year on zoom calls while day drinking.
YHC called it BRR Lite, and it is. 1/3 of the miles, 1/3 of the time to complete, and 100% of the chafing. With stops at two breweries along the way and the finish line at Hampton Station in Greenville, SC it’s basically running to the next parking lot so you can drink a beer in a koozie and keep the party going. YHC snagged a spot early in the limited Ville to Ville running field because this thing sells out fast. Spots in this race are gone faster than Willie Nelson can smoke a joint. It’s so fast that the 2022 race is already sold out 3 days after the 2021 race ended.
As Cap’n, YHC wanted to keep the team small. No 15 passenger vans, no extra driver, just 4 men on a mission. BRR veteran a plus, but not a requirement. 4 committed runners, who probably need to be committed to a state run institution. To Flipper’s credit he was the first to HC. Our other two team members would be new and valuable additions to the ever growing roster of Team Up ‘n Over. Fear not UNO alumni, these new comers proved their worth.
Here’s the team breakdown
Flipper: Marathon training may not have netted him a BQ but he got faster, no doubt. In typical Flipper fashion, he took the highest mileage and hardest legs. No surprise, his big personality was only upstaged by a big performance. As captain, YHC was nervous that the marathon recovery might sideline Flipper from Ville to Ville. But not only did he bring the marathon swagger but so the performance to back it up. Flipper crushed 2,000 ft. of elevation gain over 20 miles. Highlight of the day, throwing his sweaty shirt in the driver’s side window of the van as we passed him running. *not* Refreshing.
Day-Z (or Daisy): The story behind the name is worth the rename to Day-Z. Prove that it’s not. Originally hailing from Area 51 but relocated to Metro along with his living situation. A chance encounter at SIBling Rivalry got him on the team and he did not disappoint. Due to a last minute change in the race course, Day-Z had inherited the second hardest set of legs and second highest mileage for the team. Including a 23% incline in the first two miles of his first leg. You wouldn’t know it from his even pacing on Strava. A solid BRR veteran, nothing phased him. Find him running at all the brewery runs during the week in CLT.
Hot Wing: His claim to fame in Area 51 is being related to me. By marriage. There’s no way we share a blood line, he’s like Sprockets with no hair. Shorter than short. Definite contender for rookie of the year, though. YHC got him running during Covid and on our first run together he was outpacing YHC and chatting it up the whole way. This carried over to Makeshift Marathon in November. Mile 10 and all smiles. When I told him about this race he put his game face on 8 months in advance and it showed. If you’re putting a BRR team together, he should be on your short list. He assumed an 8:45 pace but came in way under, like closer to 8:00’s.
YHC: Not one to toot his own horn, YHC took the glory leg. Also got about .10 miles short of a PR on the 10K, sub 50:00. Original distance was over 18 miles, but some construction outside of Henderson-ville-town-ship-burg changed up the route and cut off two miles. YHC ain’t no defeatist, and ain’t no complainer, the motto is to just keep kicking with bigger and better things. YHC decided the end of the race was a good place to run an extra two miles. And by run an extra two miles, YHC means to blow through the last turn and keep going. Serves YHC right for passing like 8 people in 3 miles on that leg and running all alone. (hums Eric Carmen’s “All by Myself”). Eventually, YHC figured out that the finish was the OTHER way and turned around. The poor volunteer at the end of the race was not impressed with the sweaty-yeti loudly explaining that the sign was missing. #YetiKaren
Of course the usual antics happened during the race. Yelling inappropriate things at your runner as you drive by, staring slack-jawed with the 250 other middle-aged men at the female runners way too young for you and way too out of our league on our best day, dirty jokes, and dirty smelly vans. The BRR veterans know that smell, open up that door and it smells like success, or pheromones. Whatever you college types like to call it.
At the end of the day these fellas left their mark on ‘dem ‘der hills. Midriff was the champion/gold-medal/MVP of the South Mountain Slog. Team UNO only took 81 out of 236 with an average pace of 8:15/mile, the slackers that we are. Can’t win them all, but it’s never about winning when it’s Completely Stupid and Utterly Pointless.
Next up, BRR.
#SYITG
Cap’n Hoover
DCCs
Warm-up Run 1.5 miles
The Thang
Spirit Trail 5k pace x 5 w/ 90/120 rest
Lost Easy Button after the second round due to twisting his ankle. Glidah carried him out.
Beetle took a tumble
Cool Down Run 1.0 – 1.25 miles
Moleskin
The morning started of with who hasn’t Q this month? Good Fella was Qing Thursday and everyone else had except for Beetle who was an FNG yesterday. He gladly stepped up to help lead with some guidance.
Mumble chatter consisted of should I refinance, take out equity, housing market. There was also some complaining about getting mud on shoes. Soft!
In COT he shared a quick story about where he’s at today and something the really inspired him to reflect on his own life. I encourage you all to take a look at this story.
Bottlecap taking us out like a pro.
Warm Up – Mosey to Brookemead neighborhood, left onto rd leading to cul de sac, circle back for 6, circle up in cul de sac for stretching – Jimmy Dugans, Can Opener, Calf Stretch, Downward Dog, Upward Dog.
The Thang – Mosey back to Brookemead drive and stop at intersection of Abbeywood. Ever other driveway on the right, alternate between 10 speed skaters and 10 bobby hurleys, down to intersection of Brookemead. Circle for 6. 25 LBC’s in cadence. Continue the mosey on perimeter of neighborhood, every other driveway on the right, this time 10 SSH and 10 Squats, including the culdesac street on the right. Continue to where we started at the intersection. 25 Flutters in cadence. Mosey to entrance of neighborhood and on 6 on the sidewalk. 25 heels to heaven. Mosey to back of school, grab some wall. 40 donkey kicks Audible as ground was to slick. 10 Mike Tysons, run the track. 10 Mike Tysons + 10 Merkins, run the track. 10 Mike Tysons + 10 Merkins + 10 Carolina Dry Docks, Run the track. Mosey back to COT.
Moleskin – Doughboy was to Q today, but personal stuff came up, so he and I swapped today’s Q for my scheduled Q at Blackhawk on Saturday. Welcome FNG Freon and FNG Dishwasher. You can still sign up for WTF (Waxhaw Trail Festival), 5/1 at Blackhawk. 1 Q April still in effect, if you haven’t Q’d, raise your hand in Group Me. We don’t want to do 100 burpees in the event someone Q’s twice in the month. YHC took us out.
If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?
If a #CSAUP happens with one person, does it happen at all?
How do we really know this Midriff guy isn’t full of crap and just faking the whole thing???
Looking good a few weeks before the event with 20 PAX expressing interest and identifying 4/17 as a probable date. Keep the memes coming and guerilla advertising rolling, but doubts begin to sink in. More resounding endorsements for the event just pile onto the reality that no one will be joining YHC in this unruly expedition:
This event in 2020 was genuinely one of the highlights of the year. I wanted to share that similar experience with others this time around. After plugging this thing for months not a single soul joined in. I was disappointed. I was frustrated. I was beating myself up. I began comparing myself to other PAX and wondering what went wrong. I nearly took a few PAX up on the recommendation to simply cancel this year and pick it up again next year. My mind and spirit was in a dark place. Literally on the drive out Saturday morning I nearly turned around and threw in the towel, accepting logical defeat.
But I kept driving. While strapping on my pack and tying up my shoe laces, I realized my motivation to do this thing would have to come solely from inside. YHC would have to dig deep and confront the loudest voices of doubt and questioning largely on his own. You vs. you in the truest sense. Improvise. Adapt. Overcome. Midriff vs. Midriff
The Thang
Reflections from the Mountain
I’m already stoked for South Mountain in 2022. To the mountains we will go. To lose our minds and find our souls.
It had been about a year since an Ignition with bricks. The people were missing it and would not stop with the “when are you bringing the bricks back, Ice?” “Hey Ice, when are we going to see the bricks again?” “Ice, sir, we really mean it. Can we see your bricks again soon, sir?” Normally, I am not one to give in to peer pressure. But sometimes you have to give the people what they want.
So today we ran between 4-5 miles with bricks, never dropping them, unless holding them on the ground, like for a merkin. We did some Indian runs too, and a series of 7s, and a bunch of exercises which some of the pax opted out of after a few reps, or went to the potty instead, or pretended to trip and “accidentally” break one of my bricks. Other pax refused to keep their feet up during ab work despite me asking, “please.” All in all I’ve definitely seen better effort from some. Others gave it everything. Like Glidah and Ghosted. There was no sign of Popeye, who I think would have done well today, but he is still scared of Ignition.
People keep talking about something called “WTF.” I think it has something to do with “LOL,” or something called an “emoji,” but I am not sure.
Thanks to Xerox for taking us out.
Thank God to the start of another phenomenal week of F3 workouts! Thanks to Chicken Little and Rockwell for allowing me to lead such a great bunch of men today also. I wanted to make the workout difficult but keep it interesting with a variety of running and exercises. I hope you enjoyed it.
The Warm Up – DICCS were given in Middle School parking lot @ COT. Mosey to circle in front of Middle School. Warm up exercises consisted of:
The Thang – Stay at overhang at Middle School circle and partner up. One partner is the timer, the other partner performs the exercise. 150 dips as a team and 150 step up’s as a team. Mosey to road at front of middle school. At each light on right side, alternate exercise of 5 Jump squats and then 5 speed skaters. Head towards circle in front of the High School (come on back Goodfella!) We gathered the pax for a quick leg extension on the curb and we quickly headed to the hill at the side of the High School. At the bottom of the hill we were greeted by plenty of moans and groans. Bear crawl up the hill, at the top 10 Bomb Jacks and run back down the hill for 20 WWII push up’s. Rinse and repeat 3 times. Mosey to the HS parking lot for a Starfish. I forgot to mention the slalom the Shake and Bake performed, impressive! The starfish consisted of 5 burpees in the middle and the 4 corners of 20 LBC’s, 20 Freddy Mercury’s, 20 Box Cutters, 20 Toe Touches. We did a mosey behind the HS to the fence for a quick 20 count fence squat. Mosey towards busses at Middle School for lunges and 40 wall squats. With not much time remaining (The Apple watch was a minute faster) we had to mosey back to COT. At COT we did American Hammers till the Apple Watch had called for time. Again, the other watch had a minute remaining.
The Moleskin– I hope everyone had a good workout and you all worked many different parts of the body today, that was the plan. I might ask Goodfella next time to bring the Rocky music to make it a little more interesting. I had fun putting this together and I hope you enjoyed it!
Announcements – Before announcements we named our FNG for today. Let’s all welcome Rob Bailey who is now called Beatle. Beatle Bailey was shortened. Waxhaw Express – you will need a headlamp! Transporter – They need help Thursday night 6:30 pm Christ Closet @ Byram Road and Newtown Road to load the truck. Mad Dog – who still needs to Q?? Help the Sight Q’s!!
Prayer and Family Photo – I am including all PAX on this post because I did not want to delay this backblast. I hope you do not mind.
10 for an old classic beatdown
Head towards the Stones for warmup
SSH
Imperial Walkers
Windmill
Head across Johnston toward the Premiere Deck.
YHC gave some convoluted instruction about counting lights. Note: use the lights in the media for counting.
Every two lights. 5 merkins at first stop, 5 squats at the next. alternating until we get to the corner.
Into the Premiere deck.
Run up a deck, Back down, 5 burpees, back up 10 Jump-Squats. Mary while we wait.
Repeat this pattern to the top. Gasser.
Mic Check hates if someone runs faster than him. Great seeing Lex out front pushing mic check. War Eagle and Teddy close behind.
Top of the Deck. Enjoy the view.
(Reminisce about the time a group of college kids was partying thru sunrise. It was uncomfortable running into them. we left quickly.)
Lunge Walk across the lot. Bear crawl back
Lunge Walk across the lot, Bear crawl backwards back.
Head down the stairs and towards the hill weave.
Wild Turkey led us in this old classic slalom. Where was MT? YHC forgot to tell Turkey to stop. I think he would have slalomed across the bridge.
Top of Bridge – grab some bridge and 50 air-pressses in cadence
Head to the Lance-lot (??)
Downhill suicides with PAX Called excercises at the stops.
Head behind the building for uncomfortable Balls-to-the-Walls with 5 presses if you got it.
Head to rock work for three rounds of
10-10-10 Curls
10 Presses
10 Tricep Curls
10 Bent-over Rows
10 Squats
Mosey Home.
Thine Only.
Great group today. Lots of enjoyable mumblechatter curtesy of Mr. Bean but giving it right back. It had been a hot-minute since YHC was at stonehenge. It was nice to go inside somewhere for coffeeteria.
Upcoming Items:
SOB Wars
WTF – Trail run
This is the story of 11 HIMs, and another HIM, and yet another HIM.
Lots of discussion before launch of long weekends and barely making it out of bed to start the week of right. Nevertheless, 11 HIMs took the red pill this morning and posted to Firestarter. Brief disclaimer provided to the group of vets and we launched promptly @ 5:30am.
The Thang
Quick mosey up to the 131 parking lot for a little warm-up.
Warm-Up Exercises in cadence:
Completed the CoP and we headed off up Blakeney Heath rd. to the top of the hill.
[This is where our story gets more interesting. I’m going to assume that it was around this time that One Star and C3PO both showed up. Albeit just a little ahead/behind each other and set off to find the elusive PAX unaware that we were headed to the little-used section of the AO headed toward Montessori.]
We ran to the top of the Blakeney Heath hill and stopped before getting to the Montessori school. At this point, YHC called for a Triple Nickle back down to the entrance to the Blakeney Heath neighborhood. At the bottom, 5 Mike Tysons, at the top 5 Heels to Heaven. I had forgotten how sneaky effective that hill is at gassing the group. Doing it five times added just the right amount of push.
Next we headed down to the Montessori school to some lifting rocks.
[By this point, I’m assuming C3P0 had already run through the shopping center, across to the medical park, and figured he’d try Blakeney before hitting up the Nail Salon. Assuming One Star had done the same, sans heading to Blakeney hill.]
Everyone grabbed a lifting rock from the very limited selection, and we did some upper/lower bodywork. Did two rounds of 20 Curls, 20 Thrusters, 20 Triceps Extensions, 20 Dips. It was at some point in the middle of our second round that C3P0 makes his way over the hill to join the group. Not sure how he found us though. That triple nickel took it out of the group, and we were just about silent during the rock lifts. Regardless, 12 men now headed back toward Blakeney to finish up the workout.
[At this point, One Star could have decided to grab some coffee and draft into CoT but instead, he continued on his search.]
We made our way back to the stairs near the My Gym for some pull-ups and timed runs. Split up into groups of three. Two PAX on doing pull-up under each of the two stairwells, with the third PAX as the timer. Run up, over, and down the stairs and tag out your partner. Did two rounds much to the delight of the group. Toward the end of the second round, One Star finally completed his quest and joined up with the group.
Mosey to the large wall next to Banana Republic for some wall sits and arm raises. 2 rounds of 50 arm raises. Wingman called out my ‘jazz hand’ form but I like to think they were more ‘raising the roof’ than jazz hands.
Mosey back to launch and were joined by 4 runners from Blakovery for a few rounds of Mary until time. Ended the workout 6 PAX stronger than when we left.
YHC with the takeout prayer.
Moleskin
Announcements