Author Archive Chelms aka Tatertot

Steady rotation at the Bermuda Triangle

17 Pax at CCHS for another week at Centurion – no pavers this week (your welcome Champagne – I’m getting soft in my old age).

The Thang:

Warm up with IW’s X11, Diamons X11, Mtn Climbers X11

Mosey out of lot, accross 51, and over to base of big hill behind Amelies.   Reverse Bermuda Triangle route (Hurricanes do rotate counter clockwise  – left turns all the way just like Nascar) with following modifications:

  1. Backward run down straight-away to stop sign
  2. Bear crawl up side-walk to tables
  3. 10 dips and 10 decline merkins
  4. Side plank walk down side-walk to end
  5. Mosey over to other straight-away
  6. Broad jump (walk for Pro) down to light pole
  7. Run up to top of hill and do 1 burpee

Repeat 4 more times, increasing the burpee count by 1 each round.   The rabbits did some mary waiting on the six.

Line up in parking lost and down to six inches.  Sprint down to end of lot and back to six inches.   We did this a few times.

Mosey over to parking lot by Amelies for some work – low flutter x11, slow squats X11, CDD X11, SSH X1

Mosey over to picnic benches in front of school for quick circuit of 10, 15, and 10 step ups and incline merkins

Mosey around the football field and back to launch point.  Finish with boat/canoe and them burpees for 30 seconds


Pretty standard stuff with the same chatter from the same guys.   Purple Haze pointed out Nascar drivers take only left turns when questioning my route at the Bermuda Triangle before quickly realizing he has been doing it wrong all along.  Your welcome.   Prohibition actually did almost 50% of the exercises today so he is improving (a bit).  Champagne continues is unjust criticism of my form and thus future requests related to pavers will be ignored.

Scabby was out front even though he just finished 4 man BRR run (52 miles) and getting ready for Table Rock Ultra (50k) next weekend.    That is beast mode (and just stupid).

Tried to slow down the young fast guys but mostly succeeded in wearing myself out.   Don’t even have energy for an average BB so this will have to do.


Nada/zilch – Time to get some momentum in Area 51 – 3rd F

Take out – We prayed for all in the path of Hurricane Florence.

As always, an honor to lead this group.

Korean BBQ covered in sweat

It was another humid day in September. The original plan was spend the whole workout at the parking deck, but plans were changed because of the high humidity, lack of air circulation and the need for fresh air so we went off campus.

The Thang

Mosey to end of stadium
• 15 Mountain Climbers (IC) Hold it.
• 15 Peter Parkers (IC) Hold it.
• 15 Man Maker Merkins

Mosey to back of Lowes
• Wall Sits with 60 Air Presses
• 20 Donkey Kicks

Mosey to Stairs by Bonchon at McMullen Creek Market and partner up
• Set 1: Each Partner Runs stairs and around upper courtyard X 3, Incline push-ups, Decline push-ups, Dips.
• Set 2: Repeat stair routine X 3, Squats, Step-ups, Lunges
• Set 3: Repeat Stair routine X 3, P2: Heels to Heaven, Bicycles, Flutter

Mosey to Back of Lowes again
• Wall Sit with 60 Air Presses
• 20 Donkey Kicks

Mosey to top left of parking deck going up the 3 flights of stairs
• Wall Sits with 60 Air Presses (IC)
• 10 Broad Jump Burpees
• 15 Jump Squats
• 20 LBCs (IC)
• 10 Burpees
• 15 Squats
• 20 Rosalitas (IC)

Mosey back to start

Naked Moleskin

Small crowd this AM – probably a combination of BRR, lack of marketing, and the comforts of the fartsack. Regardless, everyone who showed up worked hard as YHC tried to keep mileage down as part of the AO requirements. YHC is obviously missing out on the Korean BBQ at Bonchon which was a hot topic among the Pax because it was right beside the stair work. The Burpees at the end of the workout seemed to be crowd pleasers. YHC workouts have been very sporadic so it was wonderful to get out in the gloom with the Pax despite the humidity.



Based on site Q pre-tweet last night, 16 PAX arrived at Calvary thinking Anvil would be Lollapalooza (do Baptists even allow Lollapalooz’a on their property).  None of the PAX bothered to buy a ticket from the Q in advance so YHC decided to switch from providing the beat to providing a beat-down.

The Thang:

Disclaimer properly given once Brilleaux walks up (right as the clock hits go time).   We mosey to parking lot on other side of campus for quick warm up –

  1. SSH X5 (cut short out of respect to Hops and Purple Haze – don’t know what came over me that led me to give those two any respect)
  2. Mtn Climbers X15
  3. Diamonds X10
  4. Slow squats X10
  5. 5 burpees

Over to base of hill near ball field for Jacobs Ladder.   Run up to top of hill and back down.  One burpee.   Repeat the hill run for 7 trips increasing the burpee count up to 7 on last leg.  Lorax out front but the dude is only 32 (or something like that) so no VT for him

Find a partner and line up abreast on the soccer field.    Partner 1 does called exercise while partner 2 does a mini suicide to small goal and back and then large goal and back.  Flap jack with partner

Round 1 – Merkins and dolly while partner does bear crawl to small goal, sprint back, then sprint to far goal and backward run back to start line

Round 2 – Wide arms and flutter while partner does lunge walk to small goal, sprint back, karoke down to large goal and karaoke back

Round 3 – Partner carry to small goal and back, flapjack, and then alternate sprint down to large goal and backward run back

Round 4 –  Carolina dry docks and LBC’s while partner broad jumps to small goal, runs back, and then sprint to large goal and backward run back.

Mosey up to pavilion for 3 quick sets of circuit work (10, 15, 10) – Step ups, dips, and decline merkins

Mosey down to rock pile and grab one rock per team.  Line up abreast in the parking lost.  Alternate short and long run down lot while partner does curls, push presses, and lateral extensions.    We ran two sets for each partner (roughly).

Drop off rock and head down to lower lot near where we park.    Partner 1 does inverted plank leg lifts (sounds good even if that is not what it is called) while partner 1 does lunge walk half way down, sprint the other half and then backward run back.   We may have done another circuit but I don’t remember for sure.

Back to starting point for some mary and stretching (wise old man move).

Naked Moleskin (someone may have to tell Dangerfield what that means along with Merkin or he can google it).

Strong group out this am.   Caddilac building up some steam coming of IR (a two year IR but at least he’s back).   Cobains to him as we went over 2 miles even though I told him I would try to keep it under 2 miles.   Kingswood was representing strong with YHC, Caddilac, and Dr. Belding.    We are ready to take on any hood.

Lots of whining from the regulars.  The grass was recently cut and moist so it was a little uncomfortable but that makes us stronger (and smellier).   Bug Eater threatened to leave early but it was an empty threat since it didn’t come until 6:08.  Purple Haze just likes to haze YHC but complaining about the runs at the end was out of character.

No BRR runners in the group but that is understandable  – this was not really a Taper workout.   We discussed Spike Ball as an alternative so I may be reaching out to a few PAX to see if we can come up with a workout based on the game.  Way more fun then running.  Team Flat-n-the-Hills heading up to Hanibal estate for some fellowship tomorrow night to honor the end of our 4 year streak and to provide well wishes to teams at exchange zone 6 before heading back to Charlotte.    Might be some spots open so hit him up.


Best wishes to all the teams running BRR and please continue to pray for Palmer family and Jennings recovery.

As always, a privilege and honor to lead this am.





Modify as Necessary Taken Too Far

I know the Disclaimer is important but several pax, including the two AO founders, seemed to take it a bit too far (I think their heart rate got higher climbing out of bed this am – why bother).   10 were properly disclaimed (a few took notes) and it was time to get down to business The Fishing Hole way (low miles).

Mosey out of lot and lunge walk to next speed bump.  Mosey over beside football field (where there will be a massacre tomorrow night) and bear crawl between 1st and 2nd speed bumps and plank walk between 2nd and 3rd speed bumps.  Mosey down to practice field.

COP – Merkins X10, CDD’s X10, Stagger Right X5, Stagger left X5

Partner work

  1. Partner leg throws
  2. P1 planks and partner 1 crawls underneath and around 5 times.  Flapjack and repeat
  3. Partner leg throws

Mosey over to parking deck and plank for the six.   Find partner for hand slap merkin ladder.   1 HSM, plank walk to next line, 2 HSM’s, plank walk to next line and go up the ladder to 6.   A few minutes of mary at deck 2 with flutter x15, dolly x15, and Rosalita x15.   Bear crawl half way down deck 2 and then lunge walk to half way point.    Ladder 1-6 partner HSM with plank walk up to level three.   Broad jumps and lunge walk to half way point and then mosey to other end of level 3.   Partner carry up to level 4 twice.

20 OYO decline merkins and then mosey down the stairs and to front of school for circuit work.  5, 10, and then 15 of step ups, dips, and incline merkins

Mosey back to parking deck.   Ladder of 5, 10, and 15 Dragon kicks on the fence and balls to the wall merkins on the parking deck wall.

Mosey back to starting point for a few minutes of stretching (important at any age but especially for this beat up old bunch).

The Fun Stuff

My last lead was the hardest workout ever (Hardest workout ever ) and this one had the most modifying as necessary ever so I have two VT’s on my shelf.   Mr. Bean and Frehley’s Comet would both be shot if a vet checked them out.  Kirby did have an excuse as he’s coming off IR and Strange Brew did a pre-run so I figure he deserved some modifications.   Lots of guys looking like they are injured but I would need a doctors note to confirm.

On the agenda for the next Area 51 board meeting is whether or not to purchase gas masks for the workouts that Frehley’s attends.   A herd of cows doesn’t put out as much methane as he does.

Tag-a-long didn’t get the note that this is an old man workout.    He is not that much over half my age (can the USC grads figure that out – I’m 53 so roughly how old is he?).

Purple Haze was caught cheating over at Planet Fitness last time I Q’d so he knew he had to post.  He made the mistake of telling me where the new location is.  We don’t have to run that far but rather we can just change the launch point of the AO to the PF parking lot.

Cooter said he is Cooter #1 – not sure how to interpret that.  He seemed pretty proud of it but I was a little nervous after hearing him state it.   I don’t think he hangs out with Caitlyn Jenner but one never knows – not for me to judge so I’ll leave it at that.

An honor to lead such an upstanding group of men even if they are a bit broken down.

Announcements – Madame Tassaud is still recruiting for Great Wolf Lodge outing – longest marketing campaign ever

Hardest and longest F3 workout ever

5 pax (4 old and one getting closer every day) conducted the hardest and longest workout ever seen in Area 51.  It was a whopper I tell you.

List of what we did

  • 500 burpees
  • 1,000 merkins
  • 2,000 LBC’s
  • 15 miles of running
  • Mowed Mermaids grass (he’s on vacation)
  • 10 Triple nickels (that $1.50)
  • Bermuda triangle
  • Lifted weights with Purple Haze over at Planet Fitness (I guess that doesn’t count since we worked out inside for that portion)
  • Painted the parking deck

We really got after it – old men can get shit done.

Naked Moleskin – Too tired to remember.  Like I said we got a lot of shit done.  A few observations:

  • Snooka cannot physically do karaoke – odd for the fasted 57 year old man on the planet
  • Shoe is an expert on Croatia now – just ask him
  • Margo didn’t bring us some home made beer – I should have made him do 600 burpees
  • Jamboree actually beat Snooka in one of the running portions but came in dead last in the bear crawls

PS – We actually ran two miles and stopped at a rock pile, the outside tables, the parking deck and a nasty ladder of 5, 10, 15, 20 dragon flies and donkey kicks before finishing with a few minutes of Mary but that didn’t sound like a very big fish.

It’s a Vacation Week

I knew July 5th would be lite and was thinking I might even be able to head back to the fart sack (only Thin Mint Q’s a PAX of 1).    However, 3 others posted to hold me accountable for my duty.  The BB will reflect vacation week brevity.

The Thang

Warm up with SSH, Squats, Lunges, and Mtn Climbers

Jog up to shopping center for some called exercises and then run loop up stairs around to other end back down and to start after each set (with some planks in between, including reverse plank – your welcome Margo).

  1. 25 dollies, 25 flutters, 25 Rosalitas, and 25 LBC’s
  2. 50 of each of above
  3. 25 merkins, 25 CDD’s, 25 Mtn climbers, 25 squats
  4. Repeat 3
  5. Repeat 1
  6. Repeat 2

Jog back to benches in front of school for some bench work with two rounds of step ups and merkins

Over to school entrance for bear crawl, donkey kick, lunge walk circuit times 2

Over to brick benches for dips and decline merkins

Back to lot for some LBC’s and 30 seconds of burpees

Naked Moleskin

Unlike Shoe, I always post a BB within one week.   Shoe still owes the PAX a BB from June 28.

Margo brought our average age down to under 50 but we were glad to have you.   Frehley’s Comet is faithful site Q even though I’m not sure he has recruited a single PAX to lead (didnt’ even recruit himself).  Chopper is also a regular  – should have known there was no way I would get a pass this am.

Announcements – None, nadda, zilch.

An honor as always to lead.


Don’t make the Q angry – especially when he’s old

7 dudes showed up for the best workout at Charlotte Latin on Tuesday am (sorry Fast Twitch) to get ready for the pool on the 4th.  Great to see Hopper even though be led the mutiny of our BRR team (and even though he heckled my form – more later).

The Thang:

Mosey over to walkway beside football field for an ark loader.    Three times up the incline walkway with 5 burpees at the top and 5 squats at the bottom:

  • Bear crawl up and run down
  • Crab walk up and run down
  • Lunge walk up and run down

Mosey over to football field for 4 corners.  Run to each corner of field and perform 10 of called exercise:

  • Round 1 – Merkins
  • Round 2 – CDD’s
  • Round 3 – Squats
  • Round 4 – Lunges (4 each leg)

Mosey up to nice (and dry) field next to Swim MAC after stopping on the bridge for 5 burpees

A few minutes of mary with Rosalita and dolly/flutter.  Partner up with partner 1 sprinting and partner 2 performing called exercise until partner 1 returns and switch

  • Round 1 – Merkins and mid-field sprint
  • Round 2 – CDD and mid-field sprint
  • Round 3 – Squats and full field sprint
  • Round 4 – Lunges and full field sprint
  • Round 5 – One legged squat and mid-field sprint
  • Round 5 – One legged squat and mid-field sprint

Up to pavilion at top of parking lot for more partner work.  Partner 1 sprints up stairs and around porta-john and back while partner 2 does peoples chair then switch

  • Round 1 – Regular peoples chair
  • Round 2 – One legged chair
  • Round 3- One legged chair

Mosey down to the bridge for some merkins

  • Round 1 – 20 extreme decline merkins
  • Round 2 – 20 incline merkins
  • Round 3 – 20 extreme decline merkins
  • Round 4 – 20 incline merkins

Back to walkway by football field for one more arc loader – bear crawl and 5 burpess

Mosey back to base for a 2 minutes of LBC’s

Naked Moleskin

We didn’t have qualified form police this am so Hopper decided to try his hand at it with critique of my merkins.   #firewood  I appreciate the love but even a professional like Champagne can’t fix my form.

Orange Whip let me think I would be the rabbit this morning but finally let his inner ego (and youth) take over and jump out front.   Stayed there most of the morning but it did help me push harder – thanks brother

I’ve asked O’Tannenbaum his name like 4 times – I’ll get it right eventually brother but I think you keep changing your make-up and hair style (yea – right) to confuse me.

Pretty sure we worked harder than Fast Twitch crew even though they were at it for 60 minutes.   Effective and efficient is my motto.

European Vacation is more important than a BB

Shoe was supposed to remember the count (and write a BB) but he skipped town for a European vacation (coach class – really?).   I think it was 8 that posted at The Fishing Hole ( actually remember 7 after 5 days) but I could be wrong.   Shoe was too busy preparing for vacation to write this BB so he turned it over to YHC.   As such, anything written in this BB may be incorrect, false, misleading or never happened (you can bet on all of those).  It for sure was easy – no way was Shoe risky injury before his flight to Germany.

We covered about 0.75 miles doing lots of imperial walkers and cotton pickers (Shoe likes those).  We also discussed Shoe’s travel plans.   One would think a man his age could afford something nicer than a hostel but I guess he’s making his boys learn to travel on a budget.

Strong work by all, especially War Daddy Boomer who is something like 67.    Chopper was just glad not to be War Daddy for once.

The Triple Play

14 Pax posted at CCHS for the best Friday workout in F3 expecting the usual – but YHC decided to forgo the pavers (this time).

The Thang:

Jog from parking lot to the entrance to the greenway

COP – 10 Mtn Climbers, 10 one legged merkins, 10 Peter Parkers, 10 one legged merkins all in cadence

First out

Partner up – Partner 1 does parking lot work while partner 2 heads over to pull up bars for pull ups (AYG) and squats.

Round 1 – Broad jumps down parking lot and bear crawl back

Round 2 – Lunge walk and crab walk

Jog back to the school, partner 1 grabs a rock, and head into the parking deck

Second out

Team must complete 50 burpees, 100 merkins, and 150 squats.   Partner 1 starts the exercises while Partner 2 carries rock up to level 2, down to middle stairway and down back to start where the partners switch.   Teams finishing first got extra credit of dolly with the rock while partner ran sans rock.

Third out

Down to practice field for a quick ladder.   Run 10 yards and perform 1 burpee, back to start for 5 squats, run 20 yards and perform 2 burpees and back to start for 4 squats, continue all the way up to 5 burpees and 1 squat.

Mosey over to drive next to football field.  Lunge walk from 1st to 2nd speed bump and then bear crawl from 2nd to 3rd.   Back to parking lot for a few minutes of mary and some IW’s or burpees (Mermaid’s idea) to finish out the clock.

Naked Moleskin

That one hurt.   Carrying the rock and then going right into burpees sucked.   Abacus pulled a fast one on the old brother and only did 20 out of 50 burpees.   Purple Haze continues to criticize my form (#fakenews) but I think it is a distraction from the real travesty called him doing a bear crawl.   Also, Purple Haze is supposedly a CPA but I don’t think he can count to 150 as they finished way ahead of the pack.  Maybe it was his partner that lost track – yea right.

Welcome to FNG Overdraft – brother of Lorax (they sound almost exactly the same except Lorax’s lisp is more pronounced).

Runstopper actually made it on time but Drago took his place with a late arrival.  The tardiness got Runstopper motivated to push Drago the whole workout.

Our site Q’s were both absent even though the regional Nantan and former site Q attended – not going to look good on the year end review (no bonus maybe).

I am smoked so hope the rest of you felt like you got your money’s worth.    My watch says I should rest for 3.5 days and I may just listen to it for once.


Pray for Olive (Greg Latini) and family as there child is fighting a virus and they already lost one child a few years ago.  Also, continue to pray for Jennings Palmer.

American 4 miler and Speed for Need race on July 4.  Sign up soon.

As always, an honor and a privilege to lead this group.

Another Solid Horsey BB – The Bladerunner by Spooky Jon

The Bladerunner

10 Men gathered for the workout that burns so bright it can last only three months. No frills hills was the name of the game. Two times up the appetizer hill to warm the legs, then it was figure eights on the McHorsey course with alternating trips up Yuca Sucka for 40 minutes. Stopped at 6:00 for a bit of core work and two final sprints up the one of the many hills before heading back to the parking lot.

The thing about the McHorsey backblast is that not much happens in the way of the workout. You run – hard. It is very simple yet one of the hardest things you will do all week. It is just like a life well lived – not complicated but hard. So back to the McHorsey backblast. You’ve gotta come up with something else to say, because (as demonstrated above) the workout description just isn’t gonna hack it.

So thinking about McHorsey and why it lasts only three months. For this I will reference Ridley Scott’s masterpiece, Bladerunner. For context (and for those millennials in F3 that perhaps didn’t catch this back in 1982), replicant Roy Batty, played by Rutger Hauer, is back on earth seeking more life. You see, the company that manufactured him installed an expiration date on his body. A fail-safe, as it were, to make sure these replicants didn’t get too uppity. In Roy’s case this was a very wise decision indeed. Roy had escaped a replicant work colony and was causing havoc across the galaxy. You see, Roy wasn’t cool with the expiration date. He was going to the source for more life. Enter Tyrell – the head of the company. Roy confronts Tyrell demanding more life, but is confronted with the terrible news that indeed he has less. As Tyrell puts it:

“The light that burns twice as bright burns for half as long, and you have burned so very, very brightly, Roy.”

Roy doesn’t take it well, but that is a discussion for another day.  Here is the link to the scene:  (disclaimer: sensitive people should not watch to the end)

So back to McHorsey and the three months. Frankly, it is all anybody’s got in the tank. McHorsey burns so very, very, brightly. But it is fleeting. Lightning in the sky , a fart in the wind, whatever you want to say. But the point is this. If you sit on your ass and don’t come soon it will be gone. Take that as a metaphor for life too. Burn brightly, just like McHorsey and be out there next Monday. Our man Fishwrap has the Q this June 25 and nobody burns brighter.

See you there!