Author Archive Chelms aka Tatertot

It’s a Vacation Week

I knew July 5th would be lite and was thinking I might even be able to head back to the fart sack (only Thin Mint Q’s a PAX of 1).    However, 3 others posted to hold me accountable for my duty.  The BB will reflect vacation week brevity.

The Thang

Warm up with SSH, Squats, Lunges, and Mtn Climbers

Jog up to shopping center for some called exercises and then run loop up stairs around to other end back down and to start after each set (with some planks in between, including reverse plank – your welcome Margo).

  1. 25 dollies, 25 flutters, 25 Rosalitas, and 25 LBC’s
  2. 50 of each of above
  3. 25 merkins, 25 CDD’s, 25 Mtn climbers, 25 squats
  4. Repeat 3
  5. Repeat 1
  6. Repeat 2

Jog back to benches in front of school for some bench work with two rounds of step ups and merkins

Over to school entrance for bear crawl, donkey kick, lunge walk circuit times 2

Over to brick benches for dips and decline merkins

Back to lot for some LBC’s and 30 seconds of burpees

Naked Moleskin

Unlike Shoe, I always post a BB within one week.   Shoe still owes the PAX a BB from June 28.

Margo brought our average age down to under 50 but we were glad to have you.   Frehley’s Comet is faithful site Q even though I’m not sure he has recruited a single PAX to lead (didnt’ even recruit himself).  Chopper is also a regular  – should have known there was no way I would get a pass this am.

Announcements – None, nadda, zilch.

An honor as always to lead.


Don’t make the Q angry – especially when he’s old

7 dudes showed up for the best workout at Charlotte Latin on Tuesday am (sorry Fast Twitch) to get ready for the pool on the 4th.  Great to see Hopper even though be led the mutiny of our BRR team (and even though he heckled my form – more later).

The Thang:

Mosey over to walkway beside football field for an ark loader.    Three times up the incline walkway with 5 burpees at the top and 5 squats at the bottom:

  • Bear crawl up and run down
  • Crab walk up and run down
  • Lunge walk up and run down

Mosey over to football field for 4 corners.  Run to each corner of field and perform 10 of called exercise:

  • Round 1 – Merkins
  • Round 2 – CDD’s
  • Round 3 – Squats
  • Round 4 – Lunges (4 each leg)

Mosey up to nice (and dry) field next to Swim MAC after stopping on the bridge for 5 burpees

A few minutes of mary with Rosalita and dolly/flutter.  Partner up with partner 1 sprinting and partner 2 performing called exercise until partner 1 returns and switch

  • Round 1 – Merkins and mid-field sprint
  • Round 2 – CDD and mid-field sprint
  • Round 3 – Squats and full field sprint
  • Round 4 – Lunges and full field sprint
  • Round 5 – One legged squat and mid-field sprint
  • Round 5 – One legged squat and mid-field sprint

Up to pavilion at top of parking lot for more partner work.  Partner 1 sprints up stairs and around porta-john and back while partner 2 does peoples chair then switch

  • Round 1 – Regular peoples chair
  • Round 2 – One legged chair
  • Round 3- One legged chair

Mosey down to the bridge for some merkins

  • Round 1 – 20 extreme decline merkins
  • Round 2 – 20 incline merkins
  • Round 3 – 20 extreme decline merkins
  • Round 4 – 20 incline merkins

Back to walkway by football field for one more arc loader – bear crawl and 5 burpess

Mosey back to base for a 2 minutes of LBC’s

Naked Moleskin

We didn’t have qualified form police this am so Hopper decided to try his hand at it with critique of my merkins.   #firewood  I appreciate the love but even a professional like Champagne can’t fix my form.

Orange Whip let me think I would be the rabbit this morning but finally let his inner ego (and youth) take over and jump out front.   Stayed there most of the morning but it did help me push harder – thanks brother

I’ve asked O’Tannenbaum his name like 4 times – I’ll get it right eventually brother but I think you keep changing your make-up and hair style (yea – right) to confuse me.

Pretty sure we worked harder than Fast Twitch crew even though they were at it for 60 minutes.   Effective and efficient is my motto.

European Vacation is more important than a BB

Shoe was supposed to remember the count (and write a BB) but he skipped town for a European vacation (coach class – really?).   I think it was 8 that posted at The Fishing Hole ( actually remember 7 after 5 days) but I could be wrong.   Shoe was too busy preparing for vacation to write this BB so he turned it over to YHC.   As such, anything written in this BB may be incorrect, false, misleading or never happened (you can bet on all of those).  It for sure was easy – no way was Shoe risky injury before his flight to Germany.

We covered about 0.75 miles doing lots of imperial walkers and cotton pickers (Shoe likes those).  We also discussed Shoe’s travel plans.   One would think a man his age could afford something nicer than a hostel but I guess he’s making his boys learn to travel on a budget.

Strong work by all, especially War Daddy Boomer who is something like 67.    Chopper was just glad not to be War Daddy for once.

The Triple Play

14 Pax posted at CCHS for the best Friday workout in F3 expecting the usual – but YHC decided to forgo the pavers (this time).

The Thang:

Jog from parking lot to the entrance to the greenway

COP – 10 Mtn Climbers, 10 one legged merkins, 10 Peter Parkers, 10 one legged merkins all in cadence

First out

Partner up – Partner 1 does parking lot work while partner 2 heads over to pull up bars for pull ups (AYG) and squats.

Round 1 – Broad jumps down parking lot and bear crawl back

Round 2 – Lunge walk and crab walk

Jog back to the school, partner 1 grabs a rock, and head into the parking deck

Second out

Team must complete 50 burpees, 100 merkins, and 150 squats.   Partner 1 starts the exercises while Partner 2 carries rock up to level 2, down to middle stairway and down back to start where the partners switch.   Teams finishing first got extra credit of dolly with the rock while partner ran sans rock.

Third out

Down to practice field for a quick ladder.   Run 10 yards and perform 1 burpee, back to start for 5 squats, run 20 yards and perform 2 burpees and back to start for 4 squats, continue all the way up to 5 burpees and 1 squat.

Mosey over to drive next to football field.  Lunge walk from 1st to 2nd speed bump and then bear crawl from 2nd to 3rd.   Back to parking lot for a few minutes of mary and some IW’s or burpees (Mermaid’s idea) to finish out the clock.

Naked Moleskin

That one hurt.   Carrying the rock and then going right into burpees sucked.   Abacus pulled a fast one on the old brother and only did 20 out of 50 burpees.   Purple Haze continues to criticize my form (#fakenews) but I think it is a distraction from the real travesty called him doing a bear crawl.   Also, Purple Haze is supposedly a CPA but I don’t think he can count to 150 as they finished way ahead of the pack.  Maybe it was his partner that lost track – yea right.

Welcome to FNG Overdraft – brother of Lorax (they sound almost exactly the same except Lorax’s lisp is more pronounced).

Runstopper actually made it on time but Drago took his place with a late arrival.  The tardiness got Runstopper motivated to push Drago the whole workout.

Our site Q’s were both absent even though the regional Nantan and former site Q attended – not going to look good on the year end review (no bonus maybe).

I am smoked so hope the rest of you felt like you got your money’s worth.    My watch says I should rest for 3.5 days and I may just listen to it for once.


Pray for Olive (Greg Latini) and family as there child is fighting a virus and they already lost one child a few years ago.  Also, continue to pray for Jennings Palmer.

American 4 miler and Speed for Need race on July 4.  Sign up soon.

As always, an honor and a privilege to lead this group.

Another Solid Horsey BB – The Bladerunner by Spooky Jon

The Bladerunner

10 Men gathered for the workout that burns so bright it can last only three months. No frills hills was the name of the game. Two times up the appetizer hill to warm the legs, then it was figure eights on the McHorsey course with alternating trips up Yuca Sucka for 40 minutes. Stopped at 6:00 for a bit of core work and two final sprints up the one of the many hills before heading back to the parking lot.

The thing about the McHorsey backblast is that not much happens in the way of the workout. You run – hard. It is very simple yet one of the hardest things you will do all week. It is just like a life well lived – not complicated but hard. So back to the McHorsey backblast. You’ve gotta come up with something else to say, because (as demonstrated above) the workout description just isn’t gonna hack it.

So thinking about McHorsey and why it lasts only three months. For this I will reference Ridley Scott’s masterpiece, Bladerunner. For context (and for those millennials in F3 that perhaps didn’t catch this back in 1982), replicant Roy Batty, played by Rutger Hauer, is back on earth seeking more life. You see, the company that manufactured him installed an expiration date on his body. A fail-safe, as it were, to make sure these replicants didn’t get too uppity. In Roy’s case this was a very wise decision indeed. Roy had escaped a replicant work colony and was causing havoc across the galaxy. You see, Roy wasn’t cool with the expiration date. He was going to the source for more life. Enter Tyrell – the head of the company. Roy confronts Tyrell demanding more life, but is confronted with the terrible news that indeed he has less. As Tyrell puts it:

“The light that burns twice as bright burns for half as long, and you have burned so very, very brightly, Roy.”

Roy doesn’t take it well, but that is a discussion for another day.  Here is the link to the scene:  (disclaimer: sensitive people should not watch to the end)

So back to McHorsey and the three months. Frankly, it is all anybody’s got in the tank. McHorsey burns so very, very, brightly. But it is fleeting. Lightning in the sky , a fart in the wind, whatever you want to say. But the point is this. If you sit on your ass and don’t come soon it will be gone. Take that as a metaphor for life too. Burn brightly, just like McHorsey and be out there next Monday. Our man Fishwrap has the Q this June 25 and nobody burns brighter.

See you there!

Modified Beast with Pavers – The Beast WON

18 PAX joined YHC even though many had correctly guessed that we would carry some extra weight this am.  The heckling started exactly 6 days, 23 hours, and 15 minutes ago as Purple Haze noted last week how easy this week would be #firewood.   Then my own brother (pretty sure he was adopted from a pigmy tribe in the south Pacific) jumps on the pile right before we start this morning with a snarky comment about an easy workout.    They might think otherwise next time (and I should learn to ignore their taunts but not likely that will happen).

The Thang:

Grab two pavers and head out of the lot.  The Q promptly trips on the barrier next to the bus and smashes both pavers (saved me – now Beaver and I are the only two to trip on that damn thing).  Runstopper takes the PAX for some warm-up while YHC circles back to grab two more pavers.   No real damage #stuntman

COP – Warm up with SSH led by RS, and then merkins, mountain climbers, parker peters and man maker merkins.

Mosey to parking deck for the main event – Modified Beast.   Six trips up the parking deck (long ramp up to 3, down to other end of 3, half ramp up to 4, and stairs back to start) with 6 reps of called exercise at 6 stops (half ramp at 2, top of ramp at 3, end of level 3, top of 4, and back at bottom of deck.

  1. Squats
  2. Merkins
  3. Push presses
  4. Knee ups (these sucked as well with the pavers)
  5. Lunges
  6. Hand release burpees (that round hurt YHC)

Mosey down to parking lot at end of football field for a few minutes of Mary – shortened since the Q can’t remember the difference between a dolly and flutters.      We did dollies/flutters, flutters/dolly, rosalita and that was it (Q was smoked at this point and things were getty hazy).

Mosey over to parking lot in front of swimming pool.    20 push presses than bear crawl up the lot and run backwards back to bricks.   20 more push presses, bear crawl up and backward run down, 20 push presses and backward bear crawl up and backward run back.   Push presses and curls for 1 minute and then head back to the starting point for COT.


Well that sucked.  I completely smoked myself so I hope a few of you got your money’s worth.    You can tell the boss it’s Chelms fault if you have to take a nap this afternoon.   The pavers do it every time – carrying them for 45 minutes is aweful.   Add the Beast, burpee finish and Purple Haze’s call for the backward bear crawl up the parking lot cummulatively made it really suck.  I often confuse dollies and flutters and this morning was epic since I got them backward sequentially.   I was deep in the pain cave at that point and not thinking clearly at all.

Everyone pushed hard and the gap between rabbits and six was much less than I expected.  The pavers tend to even things out a bit.   I have a camera up to “protect” the pavers so don’t get any ideas about taking them out.     We only use a few times per year and those times are “special”.  Mermaid and Haze especially like the pavers.

Flutie parks his rental in the middle of the lot – I guess that’s how he does it now that he is living up north so he doesn’t get snowed in by the plows.   Please remember it only snows once per year in Charlotte and NEVER in May.  Next time someone parks a car in the middle of the lot we will flip it a few times to work the shoulders.



Memorial Day convergence on Saturday at Calvary and Patriot 5k at South Park Mall on Memorial day.

Please pray for Utah’s dad, who is in critical but stable condition at CMC.

Great take out by Hops – he’s starting to really get the hang of this praying thing (only took a year since he started his ministry).




Spooky Jon vs Chester at Horsey McHorse Arse

Horsey McHorse Arse is getting a face lift (and upgrade) as Spooky John has agreed to be the site Q this year.   13 weeks of misery with tentative start date on Monday, June 4 but subject to change at Spooky Jon’s discretion.

As outgoing site Q, here is the list of top 10 goals I have given him:

  1. Top 5 finish for at least 1 BRR team that trains regularly at McHorsey
  2. No hills the one day I post
  3. No sand bags the one day I post (that was just stupid Pro)
  4. Top the list of Q’s we had last year (it was damn good except for when YHC and Prohibition Q’d)
  5. Better BB’s (last year was pretty lame even if we had real runners to Q most workouts – hard to find runners that can post good BB’s)
  6. Find someone to take the Horsey trophy away from two time champ Fishwrap
  7. No repeat of Bratwurst Q when he took us down the Greenway (only time Metro and Area 51 split up – Metro was right)
  8. Beat the record of 44 PAX (set in Year 1 of Horsey)
  9. Chase down, kill, and eat a deer during COT (raw)
  10. Convince Chester to join the PAX one morning (running – make sure everyone has a partner other than Chester)

Should be aweful

Partnership with First Tee

We are partnering up with First Tee to bring their program to the kids at AG Middle School (and potentially other schools in the future).  First Tee uses golf as a way to teach nine core values and the web site states:

“The First Tee is a youth development organization introducing the game of golf and its inherent values to young people. Through after-school and in-school programs, we help shape the lives of young people from all walks of life by reinforcing values like integrity, respect and perseverance through the game of golf. And it’s making a difference.”

We have a training session at the AG Middle School Gym on April 14 from 9am to noon.  Any PAX looking to get involved (#IMPACT) can join us.  No golf skills required (if you have seen me play you will know this is true) and the only ask is that you commit to volunteering a few times each quarter.  We can also explore expanding this to other schools/locations.  Finally, this is 2.0 friendly (great service opportunity) for those 15 and older.

Contact me at twitter @pchepul/ or 704-236-8576 if interested.   Or just show up on the 14th and check it out.

Whose “Pebbles” are the smallest?

7 men ignored the call of Spring Break and posted at Anvil for some mid-week fun.   There was still plenty of chatter to make the morning interesting (more later).

The Thang:

Mosey over to grassy area next to Pavilion for warm up:

  • Merkins X10
  • Peter Parker X10
  • Diamonds X10
  • Mtn Climbers X10
  • Low slow squat X10 (PH threatened to Refusnik another round of plank work so I had to modify)
  • Stagger right X10 (or is it stagger left)
  • Stagger left X10 (see above only opposite)

Mosey over to parking lot for start of the ladder (head-fake the PAX when I called out a pyramid of 5/10/15/10/5 but was pretty sure we didn’t have that much time).   Run to stop sign by playground for 5 burpees and back to start, run to rock pile and carry your rock back to the start and do 5 squats with push presses, run to large rock on other side of parking lot (dropping off the rock as you pass the pile) for 5 merkins and then back to start.  That was round 1.  Round 2 we did 10 of the called exercises and round 3 we did 15 (YHC was pretty smoked at this point – I called an audible from a pyramid to a ladder after round 2 although I wanted to keep it a secret from Purple Haze so I only told the rabbit – Rachel).   Mary while PAX waits on the 6.

Mosey down to parking lot near launch point for some sprints, dips and merkins (30/15 and then 15/5) more sprints and finish with bear crawls.

Naked MS

Gummy acted liked he didn’t hear my disclaimer when I added that form didn’t count this morning and thus he proceeded to try to bust my chops for squats that didn’t meet some standard he set (and which he has never achieved).  Purple Haze left me alone because I allowed him to carry his pebbles instead of a real rock.  Rachel was where you expect while Lewinski was proud of keeping up with Rachel on round 1 of the ladder but then realized Rachel was only in 1st gear for round 1.

Heard at F3 should have been there this morning.   First act:

Purple haze – My stones are pretty small

Gummy – Mine aren’t much bigger

Second act:

YHC – I take a pill when gout flares – not the blue one

Scratch and win – we should do a workout at the Y where all the PAX take a blue pill before the workout.


Got nothing after that


Christine Latini Memorial run (8k) on April 21 in Huntersville in memory of Olive’s daughter who passed away from a rare disease in 2016.   Shoe and I will be driving a clown car if anyone wants to signup and there are over 200 F3 pax signed up.

Church on the Street can always use volunteers on Sunday mornings at 6am.  This is a great volunteer opportunity and YHC highly recommends.

Speed for Need has several runs planned – check out Slack/Twitter/Billboards/etc (Tolkein is a marketing machine).

Take out – Great take out by Scratch and win, thanks brother.

Fishing Hole – Where the PAX are older, wiser, stronger and better looking

11 “mature” men assembled for the launch of The Fishing Hole, an exclusive new workout designed for wiser, older, stronger, and better looking men.   T-claps to Mr Bean for starting this up (especially since AO is closer to my house than any other Thursday workout).  We had to make a few exceptions to our criteria (not naming names) to hit our opening day count target.

The Thang:

Mosey down by stadium and Cadillac reminds me this is low mileage workout.   We promptly drop down to bear crawl and lunge walks to comply with AO criteria (PAX can thank Cadillac – I would have preferred the mosey).

COP in parking lot behind field – 1 Burpee, IW x10, 2 Burpees, Merkins x10, 3 Burpees, Squats x10, 4 Burpees, Peter Parkers x10, 5 Burpees

Mosey over to rails for 15 decline Merkins and 15 pull ups.

Up stairs to level 4 for Dirty MacDeuce – 4 sets of 3 exercises to 12 count with sprint half way down deck and back between sets

Round 1 – Lunges, Diamond Merkins, Flutter Kicks

Round 1 – Squats, Maktar Jai, Dolly

Round 3 – IW, LBC, Dirty Hookup

Round 4 – Knee ups, CCD, Burpees

Jog down ramp to level 3 and then down stairs to 1

Balls to the Wall Merkin Ladder (1 to 5) with Bear Crawl to other wall and sprint back in between each “step”

Up stairs to level 4 and back down before heading over to rails for another round of pull ups.   15 pull ups, stretching (geared to mature crowd), and 15 pull ups

Down to parking lot with six Minutes of Mary with Flutter, Dolly, High Flutter, and Box Cutters.

Down behind stadium with bear crawl and lunge walk to end of field before heading over to benches in front of school.

Circuit ladder with dips, bear crawl up ramp, donkey kicks and run back to benches with 5 reps round 1, 10 reps round  2, and 15 reps round 3.

Mosey back to launch site for 30 seconds of LBC to make sure we get our money’s worth.


Great start to this new workout and T-claps to Mr Bean for his efforts.  I was expecting a larger crowd based on all the marketing pre-launch but 11 was a great number (mainly because it kept the Q heckles to a minimum – Paper Jam was unusually quiet).

Cadillac may have set the F3 record for longest Kotter as he was out of F3 for over 3 years (I have not seen him since even though he lives on my street – maybe he was avoiding YHC).  T-claps to Cold Cuts for EH’ing him and joining us from his normal Metro workout.  Again, PAX can thank Cadillac for the bear crawls instead of mosey behind the stadium.

It was especially nice to be closer to the front of the PAX than my normal position in the back.  Running is not my specialty so the under 2 mile limit is perfect for me.   Also great to meet some new guys – Kirby, Cul de Sac, and Chopper.  Also good to see Beaver back as he overcame his aversion to the site after tripping (Disclaimer) on the curb last time.

Mr Bean and Frehley’s Comet deserve all the credit for getting this workout off the ground.   Mr. Bean expressed his passion for this new workout wonderfully during COT.


Bring a “mature” friend next week.

Contact YHC (  if interested in getting involved with First Tee and kids at AG Middle School.

Also, please consider posting to Church on the Street the first Sunday of every month or finding another way to get out an make an impact.

It was an honor to lead this group and to take us out with a prayer.