Author Archive JetFuel

This may seem familiar…

6 veteran PAX descended on South Charlotte Middle School’s bus parking lot for an Easter Monday edition of Base Camp.  YHC’s calendar says Easter Monday is a Canadian holiday, and YHC is most definitely not Canadian, but it sounds more interesting than a plain ol’ Monday.  Weak disclaimer was given and off we went into the brisk early spring gloom.

COP in Preschool parking lot

LSS, Shoulder Tap Merkins, IW, Peter Parkers, Runner’s Lunge stretch

Mosey to Alexis neighborhood for a Cul-de-Sac Sampler.  PAX stayed together for all exercises to drive home the “Fellowship” aspect of the workout.

  • McPherson:  15 Merkins
  • Wycombe: 15 Jump Squats
  • McCallum 1: Wide Arm Merkins
  • McCallum 2: Sumo Squats

After each cul-de-sac, congregate at McPherson / Wyman intersection for Mary.

Mosey back to the Preschool parking lot and grab a parking space line.

  • Plank Walk Merkins, 5 ea. side of line, 20 total
  • Broad Jump Squats, ditto

Mosey to rock pile.

  • Curls, Overhead press, Triceps
  • Hot lap around bus parking lot, stopping at basketball goals 1 and 4 for 10 Merkins each
  • Thrusters, Lunges, Tea Bag Squats
  • Ditto except 5 Merkins
  • Bench Press, WW2 sit-ups, Squat Hold
  • Ditto
  • Plank Hold on rock

Short mosey to launch to finish with 5 burpees.


Mumble chatter was minimal as Area 51’s resident comedians were nowhere to be found.  Solid work by a solid group of PAX.  It is always a pleasure to lead this workout and thanks for Mr. Magoo and Thunder Road for the invite.


Lazy Q

21 PAX enthusiastically gathered in a South Charlotte Harris Teeter parking lot for the latest edition of Hawk’s Nest aka Falcon Crest.  Enthusiasm not because YHC was on Q, oh no, but rather because of NO RAIN that morning.  We cannot complain too much with all of the wintery hardship being thrust upon a wide swath of the country, but can we get a little sunshine, please??  Anyway, YHC uttered a toothless disclaimer, loitered a bit as Deep Dish roared into the parking on 2 wheels, and then cast off into the gloom to commence the commencement.

COP behind the building near the Walgreens – nobody really knows what businesses are in this building, but the parking lot is useful.

LSS, MCs, Slerkins, IW, Straight Leg Raises, Runner’s Lunge Stretch – in perfect cadence

Claim a parking space stripe as your own.  Lateral jump over the line 20x.  Plank walk merkins 5x ea. side of stripe.  Rinse and Repeat 3x.  “Is this a cardio workout??”  Nope, just channeling my inner Body Shaping workout circa 1988 ESPN.

Mosey across Colony to Stonecroft Park Dr.  Left on Summerhill Ridge Dr.  Left on Greenway Bend Dr.  This would be home base.

Mosey to each cul-de-sac (3 total), returning to home base for 5 merkins each time.

Cul-de-sac 1 — Dolly, Flutter — 10 ea.

Cul-de-sac 2 — Peter Parker, Parker Peter — 10 ea.

Cul-de-sac 3 — Jump Squats, SMCs — 10 ea.


Mosey up and over Summerhill Ridge Dr. to Lee Rea Rd.  Who was the Rea family?  Must have owned a gazillion acres back in the day.  Partner up.  YHC had the honor of being Chopper’s partner, who is crushing it at 61 (double Respect).

Partner 1 — called exercise at top of hill — Heels to Heaven, LBC, WWII sit-ups

Partner 2 — run to bottom of hill around the bend — 10 WA merkins


Mosey back across Colony and make our way to the fountain.

Derkins x10, Dips x10, Hot lap — Rinse and Repeat 3x

Mosey to launch


Much to Spackler’s displeasure, we did not have time for stomache’ exercises at the end, but looking at the summary above, we gave the core a thorough beating.  Strong effort by the PAX notwithstanding the soggy streets and Tuesday morning hangovers.  Respect for the aforementioned Chopper, Snowflake, Snuka, and Hopper.  These guys post regularly, get after it, and inspire us all.  Well done, brothers.  Lots of mumble chatter but YHC was focused on the workout and leading this motley crew thru the mean streets of South Charlotte.  YHC engaged in a post workout chat with Pop and Dish about the best Van Hagar songs, of which YHC prefers “The Best of Both Worlds” followed closely by “Pound Cake.”  Hagar was solid, but there is something about the Diamond Dave days which sticks in the psyche.  Nevertheless, the fact Oasis is not in the Rock and Roll HOF is a damn shame; don’t even try and convince YHC otherwise.

Thanks to Deep Dish and Hopper for the opportunity to Q this bunch.  It was an honor (sort of).


The Truncated Starfish

15 veteran PAX gathered in the warmish gloom at a rather large south Charlotte church named Calvary at 0530 on a Wednesday morning, 10 February, in the Year of our Lord 2021.  YHC muttered something about “having fun” in the disclaimer, which was totally lame to begin with, made even more so by this pathetic promise.  Pain?  Yes.  Fun?  Hardly.  Off we marched to the Astroturf courtyard…


Sprinklers, Peter Parkers, LSS, Shoulder Tap Merkins, Plank Hold, 6 inch Plank Hold

The Main Event

Alf once called the Calvary parking lot a “hectare of asphalt” which really cracked YHC up at the time.  1 hectare = 2.471 acres (thank you, Wolfram Alpha website — great info for geek engineers like YHC).  YHC is fairly certain the Calvary packing lot is > 2.471 acres, but YHC does not have the time to cross check this claim against Google Maps.  Let’s take it on faith that the parking lot is HUGE with ample running space.  Using the Astroturf Courtyard as home base, YHC led the PAX in a large starfish using the 4 Calvary drive entrances as the legs or arms or tentacles of the starfish.  Before you people correct this statement with “a starfish has 5 legs or arms or tentacles”, YHC knows this fact, so save your breath.  Let’s call it the Truncated Starfish, hence the title of this BB.

At each entrance, the PAX performed a Merkin-Mary set.  10 ea. OYO.  Return to Home Base for 10 Jump Squats each time.

Mosey to the Main Rock Pile and grab a lifting rock.

Thrusters, Curls, Triceps, Shoulder Press – 10 ea. – AMRAP for 30 seconds.  YHC had to memorize the proper keystrokes on my Timex Indiglo Non-Smart watch in order to activate the 30 second timer because a) YHC refuses to wear reading glasses during a workout and b) YHC cannot count to 30 in his head.  10 second rest between sets.  Replace rocks and mosey to The Pole.

If you were present at YHC’s most recent RZ Q, then you recall “Kiss the Pole” with great fondness.  Learning from past mistakes is a sign of adulting, so YHC is told, but we ran to The Pole nonetheless.  15 MC’s IC.  “High Tail it” to the Hot Box for Derkins, Step-ups, and Dips.

Mosey to the Baby Rock Pile, stopping for 10 plank knee-ups at the speed humps, and grab a walking rock.  Take a lap around the median with rock held high.  Place rock on the ground.  10 Merkins with right hand on the rock.   Flap Jack.  10 Merkins with Left hand on the rock.  Replace rock and mosey to launch.



Great work by the PAX this morning.  There were 4 Respects amongst us – Snooka, Snowflake, Lazy Boy, and Hopper.  These guys are always crushing it and inspiring others along the way.  Kotters to Hops who has been holed up under quarantine lockdown for 2 weeks as his youngest 2.0 dealt with the Vid.  All is well at the Hops household, happy to report.  Evidently, there was a hot debate amongst several PAX to settle the age-old question, Bee Gees or Eagles?  YHC can only speculate that Clover issued various “would you rather…” questions to the PAX in addition to his participation in the musical debate.  As always, it was an honor to Q this workout and thanks to Lorax and Point Break for their site Q leadership.


Prayers for Jennings Palmer, as the family is at St. Jude’s in Memphis and will be for months as Jennings battles leukemia for the 2nd time.

Prayers for our leaders and our country during this divisive time.

Blood drive on Feb. 19th at Brace YMCA

Roll Tide


Kiss the Pole

YHC has made 6 trips to St. Louis since the beginning of December in a vain attempt to closeout the Project From Hell aka Satan’s Spawn aka Shoot Me Now.  As a result, YHC’s fitness level has steadily declined into Code Red territory meaning an intervention was needed.  Nothing like a Rock Zero Q to get back in the sweaty saddle.  After a deficient disclaimer, 18 PAX launched towards greatness at 0700 sharp, notwithstanding Deep Dish and Bounce’s notable absence.

Mosey to the artificial turf courtyard for COP – IW, Shoulder Tap Merkins, LS Jump Squats, MC, Runner’s Lunge Stretch

At some point, DD and Bounce graced the PAX with their presence, immediately hurtling insults towards YHC in a pathetic effort to thwart Q greatness.  Epic fail.  Let’s mosey to our destiny at the top of the Five Knolls, shall we?

3’s, 3’s, and more 3’s…. sort of like Steph Curry.

  • Top of the Five Knolls — Merkins, Squats, Diamond Merkins — 10 ea.
  • Bottom of the Five Knolls — LBCs, H2H, Peter Parker — 10 ea.
  • Rinse and Repeat 3x

The PAX visited each cul-de-sac before departing the beloved Knolls, stopping for Merkins, Lunges, and Rosalitas.

Mosey to the big arse rock pile in front of the church.  Grab a lifting rock large enough to deflect juvenile criticism.

  • Arm stuff
  • Hot lap
  • Leg stuff
  • Hot lap
  • Core stuff
  • Hot lap

Horsehead muttered “it’s as if he planned an all body workout.”  Better to be lucky than good, YHC always says.

Mosey to the frozen tundra and partner up for Grinders w/a Twist.  YHC explained that his 9th grade baseball coach would randomly yell “Kiss the Pole!!!!” during practice, at which time you had to drop what you were doing and sprint like your hair was on fire to a faraway power pole on the back 40 of McClintock Junior High’s property.  God help you if you were last, as YHC often was, because ridicule and calisthenics awaited your return.  Harkening back to those wonderful memories, YHC called “Kiss the Pole” 2x during Grinders.  Because we never truly graduate or mature, YHC realized this exclamation lent itself to immediate and ruthless ridicule from this particular PAX.  Use your imagination as to what was said even in the presence of a minor.  Next time, YHC will call “Slap the Fence” or whatever, anything other than “Kiss the Pole.”  Lesson learned.

Mosey to Launch, stopping for 5 Merkins at each speed hump.




Not much to add to the abovementioned summary, other than to say it was an honor (sort of) to lead this group.  Thanks to Geraldo for the opportunity.  There was an absolute hilarious and disparaging comment made about SOB during COT, but decorum prevents its repetition here (thanks, Bounce).  It’s all about unity, you know?  Everyone got after this workout.  You either bring your A game to the Five Knolls, or you go home crying for mommy.  Mucho respect to Mr. Magoo, Hopper, O’Tannenbaum, and Snowflake.  Well done, men.

Time to book YHC’s next trip to STL….



Don’t Poke the Bear

The skies were ominous on Saturday morning as YHC meandered towards the large pink church known as Calvary for another edition of Rock Zero.  Battling 3,000% humidity, 17 PAX gathered for what promised to be an epic pain disbursement by YHC, who typically dispenses feel good, jovial workouts when Q’ing.  Today, not so much.  After the proverbial shirt tuck and a curt disclaimer, time for business.

COP at the Astro Turf courtyard

Sprinklers, LSS, Shoulder Tap Merkins, Dolly, Plank Jacks

Mosey to 51.  Right turn, Clyde.  Mosey to Cary Ridge Dr and congregate in the pool parking lot.  Grab a parking space.

5 Merkins on one side of the parking space, side plank walk to other side, 5 Merkins.   Repeat until 20 Merkins total.  Do it again, this time with 2 Burpees on each side of the line, 8 total reps.

Left turn on Cary Ridge.  “There are bad hills that way, Jet Fuel.”  Yessir, there are.  Mosey to end.  Mary.

Left turn on Coburn.  Mosey to bottom.

Coburn Triple Nickel

Bottom: Heels to Heaven

Top:  Plank Knee-ups

Mary when finished.  The rain made an appearance during the Triple Nickel, but the PAX was already soaked, so who noticed?  An interested black family stood on their front porch, drinking coffee, asking just what in the heck we were doing running in the rain.  YHC was not privy to this conversation, so sound off in the comments with a recap.

Mosey to Bevington Place.  Left turn.  Mary at Glynmoor Lakes Dr.  Continue mosey to Enclave Place.  Right.  Congregate at top of hill.

Partner Work

P1 runs Ballinard Lane circle (appx 1/4 mile)

P2 performs called exercise.  Merkins, Squats, WW2 situps.

Rinse and Repeat 3x.

Right on Bevington.  Right on Rea (this truly sucked).  Left into church parking lot.  10 Jump Squats OYO.  Mosey to Launch.

Mary, 10 Parker Peters IC, Done.


“This will be easy.”  “I probably won’t break a sweat.”  Sample text messages received by YHC on Friday night from F3 brothers who know not what they do.  As Wyatt Earp says in Tombstone, “You called down the thunder?  Well now you got it!”  YHC was not angry, perturbed, or agitated at the lack of respect; on the contrary, it was quite comical (as this particular text chain often is).  But, a well of determination quickly built inside YHC that would test the collective PAX mettle Saturday morning.  Quick review of previous YHC RZ Weinkes revealed many on campus Q forays dating back years, so it was time to venture off campus.  Five Knolls briefly beckoned, but YHC resisted the siren call due to recent bad memories of a Spackler-lead Anvil beat down on the Knolls.  No, YHC is not sadistic (although the last hill up Rea Rd possibly contradicts that statement).  Nevertheless, following are assorted observations and ruminations from yesterday’s fun filled Piper Glen excursion:

  • When playing backyard football, the standard rush count was 5 Mississippi.  Sometimes, this was modified to 3 Mississippi, and others, no Mississippi.  The latter was reserved for middle school behemoths who required 6 tacklers to bring him down, according to Horsehead.  When YHC played all time QB, 5 Mississippi resulted in multiple TD passes from the golden arm.
  • BLC rocked the sleeveless F3 shirt, and continues to execute flawless Merkin form.  Ageless.
  • Many black F3 shirts were on display, one of which was tucked in.  Strong showing.
  • Boonedock has gotten fast!
  • Proehl is ridiculously fast.
  • Clover is averse to meat and potatoes workouts which lack creativity.  Yet, he still shows up and puts in the work.
  • Bounce is lifetime President of the Mark Richt fan club.
  • McGee shirtless…. there are no words.
  • Hoover’s beard needs a name.

Solid work by the entire PAX on a not-so-easy workout.  YHC is honored to lead such a fine group of men as we all strive to get better in all areas of life.  Kudos to Geraldo for continued Site Q leadership, and for his acknowledgement that Joe Namath is indeed the greatest Bama QB of all time.

Announcements: Iron PAX, Blood Drive.  Check Twitter and Slack for details.

Takeout:  YHC.  Prayers for our divided nation.


Cool Runnings

9 veteran PAX made the solid decision to begin this week on a high note and post at Base Camp, held weekly at South Charlotte Middle School, 0530 sharp.  None of that 0600 “summer schedule” nonsense.  Real PAX post at 0530.  YHC rolled into the SCMS parking lot in plenty of time for witty pre-Q banter, including asking Sardine why he was stretching his calves 75 feet away from anyone else.  Social distance to the max, my friend?  He actually said the words, “I think it feels cooler this morning.”  Not sure which planet you are currently living on, sir, but the gloom has been a buck nasty humidity slog for weeks on end, and this morning was no exception.  Disgusting.  The worst disclaimer EVER was given, and off we ventured into the South Charlotte swamp…

Mosey to the preschool parking lot next door.


Mountain Climbers, LSS, Peter Parkers, IWs, Parker Peters – all x10 IC.  Finished w/ a quick stretch which exposed a severe lack of balance amongst several PAX.

Mosey down Strawberry, Left on Woodfox.  Jump Squats (or Merkins) x10 at the lone speed hump.  Continue to end of Woodfox where we stopped for Merkins (or Jump Squats) x10.  Left on Woodfox.  Congregate at bottom of Rising Meadow.

Triple Nickel (you know, you love it) – Heels to Heaven at top, Plank Jacks at bottom.  Mary to wait on the 6.

Mosey back to Woodfox.  Staggered arm Merkins, 10 ea. hand OYO.

Mosey to SCMS rock pile.  Grab a respectable lifting rock.

OH Press, Curls, Triceps – x10 IC.  Hot lap around the baseball field.  Mary.

Upright rows, Front shoulder raises, Sumo Squats – x10 IC.  Ditto.

Replace rocks.

Mosey to launch.  0615 on the dot as told by the non-smart Timex Indiglo sans glo.


Solid effort by the group today notwithstanding 3,000% humidity, COVID, Social Unrest, mentally deranged school board, and a general sense of WTF about life in America these days.  Thunder Road almost overslept and Sardine consumed many cervezas Sunday night, but on balance the PAX was ready to go.  Circuit City and Mr. Magoo joined YHC up front today, so obviously the Q Juice was flowing because YHC is NEVER up front.  This fact threw Clover for a loop as he uttered, “it’s not a race” during Triple Nickel.  True dat, but YHC is racing an expanding waistline and aching joints, so YHC will ride the pain free Q wave as often as possible and enjoy it.  Limey seems concerned that he may not ever see his St. Louis customer again due to COVID travel restrictions.  In the words of the American Airlines CEO, “For God’s sake, fly.”  Flo Jo and Floor Slapper punched the clock today and got it done.  Did not hear much mumble chatter so feel free to chime in and enlighten the group.

Many thanks to Thunder Road and Mr. Magoo for handing YHC the reigns today.  It is and always will be an honor to lead such fine men.


Tuck It and Go….

14 PAX congregated at a large pink church at 0530 on a warm, muggy June morning for the latest installment of the Anvil downpainment.  For a brief, fleeting moment YHC considered Q’ing the workout with shirt tail untucked, but with the known universe in seemingly unending chaos, thought better of it and tucked the short-ish F3 black Mud Gear shirt into his Target C3 shorts to provide some much needed stability to the PAX.  Cheese Curd was especially pleased with this development.  A surprisingly thorough and modestly sincere disclaimer was issued, and we were off…

Mosey to Astro Turf Courtyard


All exercises x10 IC

  • LSS
  • Shoulder Tap Merkins
  • Sprinklers (will eventually supplant the IW as a COP staple)
  • Reverse Lunge (5 ea. leg)
  • Peter Parker
  • Parker Peter

Activity #1

Mosey to rock pile.  Grab a lifting rock aka one that minimizes heckling.  Carry rock to the grass circle.

  • 10 Curls
  • 10 Thrusters
  • 10 Triceps extensions
  • Drop rock and run hot lap thru breezeway, or drop off, or covered area… whatever it’s called.
  • Rinse and Repeat, 3x total
  • Plank Hold on rock, appx 1 min.
  • Return rocks from whence they came

Activity #2

Mosey to parking lot w/ 8 medians.  PAX was perplexed by the army of Asplundh (means “grove of aspen trees” in Swedish) trucks parked in said lot, but pushed on nonetheless as Suicides beckoned.

  • Starting at Island #1, Run to Island #8, 10 Merkins, Run back to Island #1, 10 LBCs
  • Run to Island #7, 10 Squats, Run back to Island #1, 10 LBCs
  • You get the drift…

Lorax, Snuka, and Run Stopper crushed this portion of the program.  Mary to catch our collective breath, because it was a killer.

Activity #3

Mosey to Hot Box.

  • Derkins x10 IC
  • Dips x10 IC
  • Step Ups x10 OYO
  • Run to trash can strategically located 18 miles away from the Hot Box.
  • Return to Hot Box.
  • Man, that is one big piece of grass out there.  YHC took PP’s question to heart, “So, we are only running to the trash can once, right?”  You are correct, sir.

Take right out of Hot Box.  10 Hand Slap Merkins at each speed hump.  By the last speed hump, YHC’s shoulders were screaming for mercy (“Mercy, William”).

Activity #4

Mosey to rock pile by baseball field.  Mary.  Select yet another rock of respectable girth.

  • OH Presses x10 IC
  • Run lap around baseball field
  • Sumo Squats x15 IC
  • Ditto
  • Front Raises x15 IC
  • Ditto
  • Return rocks

Mosey to launch.  No time for Mary.



Absolutely solid effort by all PAX today, and it was an honor to lead.  We had 3 “respectable” PAX in our midst – Snuka, Spaceballs, and Run Stopper – all of whom got after it with the gusto of men decades younger.  YHC sports a Timex Ironman Indiglo “dumb” watch so has zero idea of how many miles we covered today.  Chime in if you please with the mileage report.  The mumble chatter seemed to be fairly tame, but then again YHC was focused on keeping the traveling circus on task and was less in tune with PAX discussions and diatribes.  Plus, Spackler was absent.  Now that explains the tame mumble chatter….  Maybe he will bring back a pet gator from his “emergency” forays at Kiawah this week.

On a serious note, YHC took us out with a sincere prayer for our hurting country.  Jesus taught his disciples to be “salt and light” to a hurting world, and man, we sure could use both in abundant quantities right about now.   YHC does not pretend to have any answers or sage advice regarding our societal woes, so YHC turns to those much smarter and wiser, in this case U2’s Bono (disclaimer: my favorite band): “Love is bigger than anything in its way.”

It’s really that simple, isn’t it?

Jet Fuel

Papa Was a Rolling Stone

20 of Area 51’s finest PAX assembled on a clear and somewhat chilly Thursday morning in the Olde Providence ES staff parking lot to tackle the behemoth known as Hydra aka Where Legends are Made.  Singing her siren song, Immortality beckoned the PAX into the gloom (after a brief and wholly inadequate disclaimer was delivered by YHC to the veteran crew).

Mosey to the OPES Bus parking lot aka The Asphalt Jungle.


  • LSS x17 IC
  • Slow Descending Merkins x10 IC
  • IW x17 IC
  • Peter Parker x10 IC
  • Parker Peter x10 IC
  • Hip Stretch i.e. Broga
  • Plank Jacks x10 IC (YHC’s shoulders were quivering at this point)

The 17 rep count represents the age of YHC’s middle daughter as of today, 27 February, in the Year of Our Lord 2020.  YHC is currently a Father to 4 teenage children which is mystifying, exhilarating, frustrating, and wallet emptying all rolled into one messy package called LIFE.  Are there times when YHC would rather ship his children to boarding schools in upper Montana?  Absolutely, yes.  Are there times when YHC is rendered an emotional, blubbering idiot incapable of speech because his children acted with tenderness and love towards one another and/or me?  Absolutely, yes.  Would YHC trade being a parent for all the Korean Kimchi in the world?  Absolutely, not.  Point being, especially for the younger PAX, it all goes by SO FAST.  Savor the journey.  “Life moves pretty fast.” – Ferris

Back to the epic Weinke…

Mosey to Church rock pile.  Partner up, grab 1 running rock per pair, and get ready for greatness.

Partner A w/ rock – runs Rea-Windyrush-Edinbridge loop CW

Partner B sans rock – runs same loop CCW

Transfer rocks at meeting point.  Continue the loop.


Flapjack loop

Mary  i.e. excuse to catch our collective breaths

Mosey to baseball fields.  Starfish to 4 ea. Center field fences.  17 ea. Merkins, Jump Squats, LBCs, and Plank Knee Ups.  16 SMC’s at the launch.

Mosey to rear of school for People’s Chair.  Overhead Press x17 IC.  BTW x10 secs.

Mosey to basketball court.  “He’s going to do those stupid basketball drills again…”  You damn right, son.  Bear Crawl, Reverse Crab Walk, and Burpee Broad Jumps baseline-to-baseline.

Fast Mosey to Rea Rd and back to Launch per Spackler’s request.




Naked Moleskinny

The 2nd rock carrying loop caused significant wailing and gnashing of teeth.  Phrases such as, “Don’t do it!”, “Who does he think he is?”, and “Bad, bad, bad call Jet Fuel” were slung amidst the PAX directed at YHC.  Running with rocks is somewhat challenging and it had been years since YHC Q’d it; as a result, today was the day.  As Sargent Barnes says in “Platoon” to the severely wounded soldier, “Shut up and take the pain!!”  You are all better men for the double rock loop, simply admit it and thank me later.  Or better yet, thank Foghorn for sporting the man tights with tucked-in workout shirt.  Untucked be damned!  Foghorn was YHC’s partner for the rock loop extravaganza, and he absolutely crushed it in both directions, thus earning street cred to wear those camel toe tights.

Solid effort by all PAX today.  YHC was in survival mode, trying very hard to perform all exercises with laser-like intensity while not passing out.  Henceforth, YHC missed most of the banter and looks forward to the PAX filling in the blanks below.  And yes, YHC did hear the flatulence.  YHC reckons that 4 trips to Korea, 1 trip to Japan, and 1 trip to Maui since October have rendered my body clock inoperable until sometime in 2023 and wrecked my fitness level.  The only way to recapture physical fitness is to get out of bed, grind, repeat.  “The only way out is through.”

As a general comment, all of today’s PAX are exemplary citizens who pay taxes (mostly) and respect their elders (sometimes).  YHC typically has comments for each PAX, but the size of today’s crowd coupled with YHC’s mental banter block have eliminated individualized comments from this BB.  You are all awesome in your own special way, so don’t change a thing.  On the other hand, “You’re all worthless and weak.  Now, drop and give me 20.”  – vicious mother

Always an honor to lead the finest AO in Area 51.


Announcements:  None suitable for print

Bloodied but Unbowed

10 PAX gathered in the moderate, overcast gloom at a large pink church located in South Charlotte for a Final 4 beatdown of biblical proportions.  We welcomed Fido to our merry band of punks, who was visiting from Down East, which means he is from the eastern half of NC to all of you non-North Carolinians.  Edenton, if memory serves.  Fido is a NCSU grad who is a practicing veterinarian (try spelling this word), in town for the holidays visiting his sister who lives off Carmel Road (not Car-Mel, as he incorrectly pronounced; that is a town in Cali once mayored by Dirty Harry himself – “You got to ask yourself one question:  Do I feel lucky?”).  An insufficient disclaimer was issued, YHC promised musical surprises in celebration of college football’s Final 4 notwithstanding Bama’s absence, and we moseyed into the vast asphalt jungle aka Calvary parking lot(s).

COP consisted of IW, Shoulder Tap Merkins, LSS, Staggered Arm Merkins, LS Jump Squat, and Runner’s Lunge stretch (bro-ga).  Good participation, strong cadence, solid start.

Moseyed on the Perimeter Rd stopping at each of the 4 speed humps for HR Merkins and Sumo Squats.  After Hump 4 (snicker), congregate at the bottom of the soccer field’s baby hill for Mary.

At this point, YHC pulled out the trusty iPhone and dialed up….a YouTube ad for Stitch Fix.  “Couldn’t sign up for the free trial of You Tube Premium, eh?”  – Gummy.  Full Disclaimer: YHC is a Stitch Fix customer, dutifully served by his Robo AI Stylist Kristi.  She just knows YHC….eerie, actually.  Anyhow, after the 5 sec ad, LSU’s fight song emanated from the speaker.  Mary until said fight song was over.  S-E-C!!  Voodoo was not there, so no Cajuns were present to enjoy it.

Triple Nickel – WA Merkins, Tuck Jumps.  YHC had no idea “Triple Nickel” was not ubiquitous in F3 Nation, so Hydra Site Q Gummy promptly explained its meaning to Fido.  Thank you kindly, sir.

Mosey to Courtyard and grab a spot on the Astro Turf.  Derkins, Leg Lifts, and something else.

Mosey to Rock Pile bordering 51.  Grab a lifting rock.  Let’s rock…  Curls, Tris, Presses, Thrusters, Squats.

Fight Song #2:   Boomer Sooner.  Hold plank on said lifting rock.  Since this annoying fight song is thankfully only 44 seconds long, a plank hold was not too painful.  Considering what LSU did to the Sooners Saturday afternoon, I would say this F3 musical interlude was the highlight of OU’s day.

Mosey to the parking lot with 8 medians for Median Suicides.  Alternate Diamond Merkins and Jump Squats.  Increase count by 2 ea. median.  3 burpees at starting point every round.  This was brutal, as mumble chatter quickly dissolved into “This is stupid” which is code for “This really hurts.”  Heard ya loud and clear, Semi.  Strong effort by every PAX on this one.  Trifusenik power was greatly reduced as even Semi pushed thru the pain.  At some point during this death march, YHC’s prodigious nose sprung a blood leak possibly caused by an overzealous snot rocket.  Unfazed, YHC pressed the advance and played thru the pain (actually, it did not hurt at all, but the sight of blood caused much angst amongst the PAX).  Rub some dirt on it, or in it.  Let’s go…

Fight Song #3:  Ohio State.  Sadly, Hopper was not in attendance to relish in O-H-I-O.  YHC was expecting him to dot the “I” if he would have been there.  YHC suspects Hopper and all OSU alums are still licking their wounds from the epic game Saturday night.  On the flip side, they could be sending boxes of spoiled cabbage aka Kimchi aka Korean garbage to the SEC official who called the fumble scoop 6 an incomplete pass.  Ouch.

Mosey to Hwy 51, take left, mosey to Calvary entrance, take left, congregate at the Hot Box.  Dips, Derkins, Step-Ups with and without flair, hot laps around garbage cans.

Mosey to launch point vicinity.  Time for the North Face.  2 laps.  Honestly, PAX was in survival mode by this point.  Hoover explained to YHC that 21 diamond merkins were a tad aggressive at the Median Suicides.  Point taken, lesson not learned.

Fight Song #4:  Clemson (ugh).  Marge and Gummy were ecstatic, elated, enthusiastic.  The ying to OSU’s yang, Clemson alums spent Sunday nursing joyous hangovers in celebration of their Final Four victory.  What a game.  It did this old SEC heart good to see some old school defense being played by both teams.  It was a shame that someone had to lose that one.


Announcements: New Year’s Eve Convergence in SOB land.  Check Twitter or Slack.

Forgot who took us out, but it was a theologically sound prayer that moved me to tears.  Or maybe that was YHC’s natural reaction after hearing the dadgum Tiger Rag again.  Are you listening, Coach Saban?

Thanks to Geraldo for handing over the keys.

Jet Fuel

Hydra Tuck Rule

PAX: Foghorn, Hopper (R), Marge, Sprockets (Co-Site Q), Amber, Pop Tart, Mr. Magoo (R), Ductwork, Chico (Kotters), Queen, Puddin Pop (@trifusenik), Spackler (@trifusenik), Semi Gloss (@trifusenik), Motorboat, Gummy (Co-Site Q), Deep Dish, Jet Fuel (QIC)

17 PAX gathered in a Charlotte Mecklenburg elementary school parking lot at 0530 hrs for a heaping spoonful of misery. For now, the school is named Olde Providence Elementary, but the sewing circle mumble chatter / scuttlebutt / rumor mill says that may change in the future to Trifusenik Senior High School. Can anyone hazard a guess as to the new school mascot? The Sloths has a nice ring to it. But YHC digresses. Now, to the business at hand of writing a tagless backblast utilizing the wonky WordPress application.

Introduction: weak — Disclaimer: weaker — Mosey to bus lot: glorious


  • LSS x 10 IC
  • IW x 10 IC
  • Staggered arm merkins, x 5 IC each arm
  • One legged bent over toe touch hamstring killer, x 5 IC ea. leg
  • Plank Jack x 10 IC
  • Peter Parker x 10 IC

Main Event #1

Mosey to behind school. Count off 1’s and 2’s, which turns out to be difficult for this Clemson-heavy group. 1’s run to oak tree benches, do 10 jump ups. 2’s run to bike rack benches, do 10 derkins. Flap Jack. Repeat 3x. Mary while we wait on the 6.

Main Event #2

Mosey to Rea, take right. Right on Summerlin. Merkins at Wessynton. Mosey to end of Wessynton. Triple Nickel up Cornwallis Camp Drive.

  • Plank knee ups at Wessynton
  • Heels to Heaven at top of hill
  • Mary when finished

Mosey to end of Wessynton. Mary. Avoid rapidly approaching car. Mosey to launch.

Main Event #3

Partner up, which was executed flawlessly after the 1’s and 2’s debacle, thus restoring my faith in the PAX. Partners run to opposite ends of parking lot. Return to middle for alternating burpees, 5 ea. for 10 total between partners. Repeat until time. @trifusenik in FULL effect for this one.



Many a PAX have poked fun at YHC over the years for tucking in thy workout shirt, but today provided vindication in the form of plank knee ups. While the PAX wrestled with creeping shirts and bare midriffs, YHC calmly performed said exercises while demonstrating flawless form and maintaining his dignity. This is why Dick’s and Academy Sports pay YHC the big bucks for modeling their latest fashions. It’s hard work making a simple workout shirt look that good.

Today was heavy on running as evident by the 3.3 miles logged on a PAX’s Garmin mileage tracker doo hickey thing-a-majig. YHC possesses a Timex Indiglo Ironman digital watch with ZERO mileage tracking capabilities. Hell, YHC barely knows how to use the stopwatch on the darn thing. YHC would apologize for the lack of lifting heavy things, but the apology would be insincere. As Pop Tart queried, “are we ever going to work out today?” Ummm, no. Run baby run.

Spackler and Gummy crushed the bench-to-bench circuits, but the glory was short lived as the Trifusenik Tractor Beam sucked Spack back into its black hole of mediocrity. By the time we hit Triple Nickel, the Trifusenik reigned supreme as their numbers swelled. A chorus of “nos” was heard upon calling burpees at the end. Run to the light, Carianne. Mission Accomplished. YHC heard lots of mumble chatter today, but his laser focus compromised retention of the conversation topics. Anxiously awaiting the PAX to fill in the blanks on the After Action Report.

It is always an honor to Q the finest workout in Area 51. YHC had the theologically sound take-out.

Roll Tide (had to say it)