2 out of 3 is BAD

2 out of 3 is BAD

After a Twitter firestorm yesterday, 14 PAX posted against their better judgement for this week’s Hydra humidity beat down courtesy of YHC.  Brief “don’t be stupid” disclaimer to the veteran PAX, and we were off.

COP (all exercises IC)

• LSS x16 (odd qty?  I think not…stay tuned)
• Shoulder Tap Merkin x10
• Jump Split Lunge x10
• MC x10
• Peter Parker x10
• Parker Peter x10
• Good Morning Nashville x10

The Thang

Mosey to church rock pile.  Partner up.  Choose running rock.  P1 runs w/ rock (Haze’s FAVORITE): R on Rea, R on Windyrush.  P2 runs sans rock:  L on Rea, L on Edenbridge, L Windyrush.  P1 transfers rock to P2; continue same direction to complete the loop back to the rock pile.  Equal rock carrying distance covered by each PAX.  Genius.

Mosey to OPES bus parking lot aka CMS’ finest asphalt.  PAX who forgot gloves would soon be cursing YHC.  Grab a parking space line.  Starting from one side of the line, plank walk to the other side of the line, perform 2 merkins.  Rinse and repeat until 8 line crosses and hence 16 merkins were performed. 8 x 2 = 16 for you Volunteer fans incl. Frosty Paws

Mary at OPES basketball black top.  Dolly, Flutter ea. x16 IC, Slow Merkins x10 IC

Mosey to baseball field concession area.  New partners.  4-leg Starfish.  Leg 1: 5 pull-ups, Leg 2: 5 burpees, Leg 3: 10 Jump Squats, Leg 4: 10 Diamond Merkins.  Return to concession area after each leg for 5 plank knee-ups.

Mosey to OPES basketball black top:  Planker’s Delight.  PAX lines up abreast.  Assume plank position.  PAX #1 plank walks down the line facing the PAX, stopping for 1-merkin at each PAX, who also performs the merkin.  Rinse and repeat until all PAX have completed the Plank Walk of Pain.

Mosey to front football (or soccer?) field.  Mosey to each of the 4 corners in CCW fashion.  Corner #1: 5 Merkins.  Corner #2: 10 Jump Squats.  Corner #3: 15 Merkins.  Corner #4: 20 Jump Squats

Mosey to back wall for People’s Chair.  PAX #1 performs 10 Merkins (or more) in front of squatting PAX, then heads back to wall.  PAX #2 performs 10 Merkins….you get the drift.

Done.

Moleskin

My, my….where to begin?  In yesterday’s Twitter-sphere, Purple Haze specified the following Hydra Trifecta which should be avoided at all costs:  1) Hops’ tank top, 2) Iron Horse’s 2″ inseam running shorts, and 3) Shirtless Semi Gloss.  Item 1:  Rectified by Hops and M Hops; tank top has been destroyed  Items 2 and 3:  Most definitely NOT rectified.  Iron Horse rolled into the AO, parked, and unveiled more leg skin than you see at Uptown Whiskey River on a Saturday night.  The PAX recovered from IH’s initial shock and awe campaign; however, IH gained his sweet revenge during People’s Chair.  Regular merkins in front of the PAX?  Yeah, right… Try reverse plank jacks, and by reverse, I mean the PAX was facing the southbound end of northbound mule.  Most of the PAX quickly looked away in horror, but Purple Haze could not turn away, as if transfixed on a bad car crash.  I fear Haze has suffered irreparable mental and emotional damage.

Item 3 occurred at some point during the beat down, perhaps Pre-Planker’s Delight, perhaps afterwards.  The PAX was oddly at peace with the bare chested one.  Disturbing…  Next time, partner carries.  Oddly enough, it was around this time that I noticed my watch spontaneously set back 3 hours.  Coincidence, or was my Timex Non-GPS Ironman experiencing a disturbance in the F3 universe force due to the aforementioned 2/3 Trifecta convergence?  Mysterious…

Other random observations:

16 represents the number of football national titles won by my beloved Crimson Tide.  YHC is a proud graduate, ’94, ’96.  Frosty Paws (who named his son Knox in honor of Knoxville, TN) just loved this factoid.  I will be expecting that dinner invitation any day now, FP.  Good thing I did not choose 26 as the number of the day (represents the number of SEC titles won by….well, you know).  And before you start chirping, yes, Clemson PAX, I realize that you STILL have the belt, as I have been regularly reminded at every single post since January.

Planker’s Delight continues to suck out loud.  Brutal and merciless in dishing out pain .

Great to see Cheese Curd in the gloom after a long boot camp layoff due to an Achilles (?) injury.  Hope to see you again, brother.

Floor Slapper arrived pre-launch.  I checked my watch for malfunctions, but found none.

Solid work by all PAX today.  Request was made for more boot camp, less running, so I was happy to oblige.  Honored to lead this group of Area 51’s finest.

RTR

Announcements

Anvil – Death Valley convergence, Wed. 7/19, at Anvil.  Coffee and fellowship to follow.  Check Twitter for Details.  Hops will be delivering words of encouragement and/or fashion advice for IH during the fellowship time.