Kevlar Preblast – We’re Getting the Band Back Together

Kevlar Preblast – We’re Getting the Band Back Together

Many months have come and gone, and the question persists . . . when is Kevlar coming back?  Fret no longer my eager compadres, for the time has arrived for Kevlar to return in all of it’s glory back to the CDS campus on Friday mornings at 0530.

There have been many questions from the pax submitted by email, text, smoke signal, and carrier pigeon.  I have ignored those, and have created the following fictional questions and answers below instead:

• Q:  Is Bulldog going to lead this thing?  We really enjoy making fun of him, and it is more convenient when he is surrounded in a circle.
• A:  Yes. . . . well at least tomorrow and then probably sometime after he reattaches his knee

• Q:  Why is the preblast coming from Horsehead?  Have you been relegated to Purple Haze  status already?
• A:  Sadly, this is also a yes.  I hope to fill the large administrative shoes left behind by Sussudio, who set the bar for this many months ago.

• Q:  Don’t band (or any other type of) reunions typically yield disastrous results
• A:  Listen, this is going to be some epic shizz.  Think of a 78 year old Mick Jagger with a dodgy knee kicking you repeatedly in the junk . . . awesome sauce.

• Q:  Will the old groupies be there, like Busch, Bananas, Brown, Stone Cold, Alf, etc . . . ?
• A:  If they know what is good for them.  Busch and Bananas are recovering from a botched matching neck tattoo removal procedure.  Brown blew out his sphincter trying to dead lift an El Camino.  Stone Cold and Alf are #runners now.  Hopefully they will all repent and come back to roost.

• Q:  What about Chelmsformsion, you know,  the workout that meets in the parking deck in on the other side of Pineville?  Do you expect guys to defect from that workout to post here?
• A:  If they know what’s good for them, they will get up early and make the trip.  Also, Chelms started the workout 5 mins ago to get a head start, so they probably won’t be able to find him.

• Q:  The Brave?  I thought that was the hardest Friday workout going?
• A:  If hunting small Hare Krishnas around the dark streets of Ballentyne is your bag, then I suggest you post there.   You’ll probably get lost, or mistaken for a sheep by Haggis.  I’ve fallen for that trick a few times, but I don’t like to talk about it.

• Q:  How about Mt. Goat?  Lots of the Kevlar guys went over there.  Will they come back?
• A:  Running around in a circle for an hour is exciting, nobody can deny this.  Good Luck at the JD Run.  Pro Tip: You’re not going to win.

• Q:  Won’t Header be lonely over at Joust?
• A:  Probably, but he has a dingleberried field of dreams to frolic in, so we think he’ll be ok.   Also, we are planning some combined events with the Joust boyz (i.e. Header and his Jeep) as an outreach initiative.  Stay tuned for this.

• Q:  Will we serve Spotted D?
• A:  Spotted D is disgusting.  BYOD.

• Q:  Are the Bangles going to be there?  Rumor has it that Susanna Hoffs will personally attend to provide a live lip-synched version of “Eternal Flame” for the Grand Finale.
• A:  Gotta post to know.

• Q:  What’s the difference between Great Britain, The United Kingdom, and England?
• A:  Nobody cares

That’s all for now chaps.

love,

Horsehead and Bulldog