No I-Phone Required

  • When:8/20/14
  • QIC: Joker
  • The PAX: Runstopper, Header, Fireman Ed, Pinstripes, Bananas, Stagecoach, Coal Miner's Daughter, Susudio, Finch [FNG], Semi Gloss, Geraldo, Puddin Pop, Sanka, Schnitzel, Turkey Leg, Strange Brew, Big Pappy, Beaver, Ponce, Bulldog, Clunking

No I-Phone Required

22 men [at least I think they were all men… frankly it was too dark to tell for sure] gathered in the humid gloom of Death Valley for a poorly planned but a well executed morning workout.

The Thang [abbreviated style]

-LBC… yep, three sets of those

-Imperial Walker, Dolly and Flutter… of course, these are required elements

-Mason Twists… one set, for fun

-Dips and Supine [sp??] Pull-Ups… three sets of each, 60 total reps

-Squats… for sure, about six sets in total, but who is really keeping track anyway

-Merkins… 323 total [assuming you were able to get in the full 50 merkins that Runstopper demanded when he hijacked my Q]

-Gassers on the football field… 120 yards out, with some merkins at the far goal post, then 120 yards back… as follows:

  • 50% run out and back
  • 75% run out and back
  • 100% run out and back
  • Backpedal out, run back
  • Karaoke out, run back
  • Karoake out, run back


  • So, I really didn’t plan this workout, I just let it come to me like an improvisational jazz player.  I knew we’d get in some merkins and I knew we’d get in some sprints… and, we did. 
  • Bulldog and Bananas were their usual talkative selves today. They’ve just got a lot to say, even at 0530.  Some chatter from Bulldog this morning about missing the partner exercises that I introduced at the convergence workout on July 4, 2013.  I may bring those back just for him. 
  • Runstopper was determined to show as much of his body today as possible.  Lot’s of “short lifting” and “shirt raising” going on.  But that is why we love him. 
  • Death Valley gets real dark on certain mornings.  I swear there were times this morning when I couldn’t see anyone except the guy on either side of me. 
  • You know, it’s becomed pretty common place for guys to use their I Phone voice recorder to keep track of PAX names in the COT.  Well, I’m a Blackberry guy [possibly their last customer], so that just isn’t an option for me.  I did get a headstart on things by writing down about 75% of the PAX names PRIOR to the workout… on my old school pad of paper.  

About the author

Joker author

Notify of
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
9 years ago

Joker, good job this morning bro. Bulldog was doing all of the talking, he was just using an american southern accent a lot of the morning that may have sounded like me. Mumble Chatterers are the worst. I can’t imagine how bad that workout would have been if i knew how to extend my arms all the way on my merkins…

9 years ago

Joker – that was straight from old school F3. Pen and paper for the nameorama, improv weinke, serious gloom, sprints on a pitch black field, and a bunch of Mary. It’s amazing F3 has not been sued since your infamous partner exercise Q although today I missed it….

Would love your thoughts, please comment.x