Goruckers on the shelf, but the show must GO ON!

  • When:02/18/13
  • QIC: Zip-A-Dee
  • The PAX: Turkey Leg, Crab Cake, Mall Cop, Cottontail, Tiger Rag, SMASH, Costco (FNG Doug Kirkland), Cheese Curd, Ice Hole, Sprague, Boots, O Tannenbaum, Unnamed FNG, Zip-A-Dee – sorry boys but I’m missing 2. PLEASE sound off and be recognized!!!

Goruckers on the shelf, but the show must GO ON!

AYE!!!!  16 brave souls entered the frigid gloom and posted at the Matrix on Monday morning, celebrating the bankers day off.  Most thinking that the holiday downpainment would be a nice leisurely gesture to kicking off a day of M-DO’s (aka Honey Dos), especially with rookie Q-Z at the helm.  As a rookie Q making his debut, TR began the hazing early and right off the bat telling Zip-A-Dee he needed to stop by the Petsmart for some dog hair trimmers for his scruff.  And then the jokes about “tights” ensued and how they speak for themselves – sorry boys but it was sub 30!  Joker even got in on the act over email wondering if anyone confused Z as James Harden (Houston Rockets) or Brian Wilson (SF Giants pitcher).  Short answer = NOT!

  The Thang:

 –          (10) Warm Up burpees on your own.

–          Not warm yet?  Okay let’s do (10) more!

 –          Mosey (Run I SAY) to the soccer field

  • Butt Kicks
  • Karaoke Left
  • Backwards
  • Karaoke Right

 –          20x SSH

–          20x Imperial Walker

–          10x Merkins

–          20x Mountain Climbers

–          20x Peter Parkers

 The Real Thang:

 –          Head up to the track, oh wait there’s a perty playground (Partner UP, size does not matter)

  • partner 1 runs around the school while partner 2 does pull-ups (AMRAPs)
  • Rinse and Repeat but run FASTER and do more pull-ups
  • Rinse and Repeat Again; however, partner 2 has option to do pull-ups, dips or decline merkins (AMRAPs)

 –          Grab some wall for Peoples Chair and analysis of the sporting events over the weekend!

  • Loved seeing Duke get throttled!  The ACC SUX and the BIG TEN RULES – “GO BLUE!!!!!”

 –          Line back up on the track for a mini-WIB: partner 1 sprints the length of the parking lot to the beginning of the track, partner 2 does AMRAP merkins x3 (regular, wide arm, diamond).

 –          Grab some wall for Peoples Chair and make fun of the bankers who have the day off today that will be returning to the fartsack after this morning’s workout.


  • I recall Turkey Leg raising his wing that he’d be off and was certainly headed back to the fartsack no later than 6:21am.


–          Grab some frozen tundra for 8ish MOM:

  • 20 LBC
  • 20x dolly
  • 20x flutter
  • 20x bicycle
  • 15x in / out
  • 15x russian twists


–          (1) minute remaining?  AMRAP merkins for 60 seconds.



Z wasn’t sure how many would post after the wintry weather over the weekend, Larry Sprinkle forecasting the temps to be in the high teens / low 20’s and most of the Goruckers on the shelf licking their wounds in the fartsack.  Rumor has it Dora was indeed dead asleep in ridiculous pain dreaming of punching Jack Webb below the belt. #GORUCK!!!  Congrats and T-CLAPS to the insane clown possey also known as Goruckers for the work you put in over the weekend!!!

 As for this morning, the PAX brought it STRONG not knowing what the rookie Q had in store!  I mean, Mall Cop was looking like a Carl Lewis’esque SPRINTER torching the asphalt!!  There was definitely a lot of chatter (words of encouragement) between partners during the mini WIB.  Encouraging words such as: RUN FASTER <grumble grumble>, it’s not a jog it’s a SPRINT <mumble mumble>; Run Forrest Run; and those in plank performing merkins taunting their counterparts by sounding off 101 – 102 – 103 etc… as they approached.  The FNGs also got into the action as Costco (FNG) decided to chime in during our 8ish MOM advising Z his watch was broken (after announcing WE HAVE TIME FOR ONE MORE) and that’s why he’s always late for work.  Well sir, if you could get Zs coffee right the first time (how hard is it to prepare black coffee?), he wouldn’t mind being on time. 

And on that note, Zip-A-Dee is OUT!


–          If anyone is interested in participating in the BRR (Blue Ridge Relay), please contact Mall Cop this week.  Preferably in the next couple of days.

–          SIGN UP FOR SPARTAN!!!!


About the author

Joker author

Notify of
1 Comment
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Mall Cop
Mall Cop
11 years ago

Great Virgo Q Zip! But I was not one of the ones tearing up the asphalt Monday as I could barely breath! Took T-Rags suggestion and got a Netty-Pot (does wonders for opening up the sinuses). Turkey Leg and T-Rag were the speedsters on the sprints. I’m glad Turkey Leg is going to be on the BRR team as he has some serious wheels!

Would love your thoughts, please comment.x