Turd Ferguson
Somewhere in the neighborhood of 10 witnessed the 7th plague of the squirting geese this morning at Anvil. I didn’t capture the pax list, but it was basically the TriFuseNik and some witnesses.
I have about 10 mins to write this, so here goes:
- Ran around some while realizing my shirt was on inside out. Fantastic.
- Warmups by some
- Starfish – cut short by enormous piles of excrement
- Suicides that were longer than I thought they would be
- Hotbox partner no-touch stuff
- Time killer runs back to home base
According to Spackler, the official Trifusenik Saturday workout has been renamed to Bear Claw and is now held at Quik Trip. Masks optional. They do Biz Markie Karaoke and watch reruns of the Fresh Prince of Belmont on Puddin Pops Amazon Fire.
Speaking of masks, Semi Gloss just opened his new Etsy store selling custom made masks fashioned out of his discarded back hair. They are already on backorder, but he sheds quickly this time of year so best to get in line.
Smokey was rocking an autographed Furtick Tank Top.
Gambit is the worst super hero. His special power is throwing cards at people. At least Hawkeye made do without any lame special powers.
-HH
Rock, Hill, Run, Repeat
It seems every few Maul workouts, we venture down Murderhorn and do some arm and leg work with rocks from nearby rock pile. This led me to a new question – “What would it look like to structure an entire workout while carrying a rock?” 6 pax gathered in the sticky and still shadows of the Stonecrest Theater and embarked on a journey of Sisyphean proportions (In Greek mythology this King of Corinth was punished for his self-aggrandizing craftiness and deceitfulness by being forced to roll an immense boulder up a hill only for it to roll down every time it neared the top, repeating this action for eternity)
The Thang
- Disclaimer
- Warmup: Side Straddle Hops (15), Imperial Walkers (15), Burpees (5)
- To the rock pile! Choose a rock wisely. Emphasis on RUNNING rock that will also be used for LIFTING
- Mosey to Thornhill Clubhouse. Partner up. 50 Groundpounders/team. One partner lifts while the other runs (with rock) to dumpster and back. Finish with 15 Freddie Mercuries. Pick up rock
- Mosey to base of Murderhorn. 20 Curls for the Girls, 20 Overhead Presses, 20 Tricep Extensions. 15 American Hammers with your rock
- Up Murderhorn. 10 Low Slow Squats at first light. 10 Bent Over Rows at second light. 10 Tricep extensions at the last light. Finish our ascent with 15 Heels to Heaven
- Back down Murderhorn, 5 pushups at each of the three lights
- Mosey back to Clubhouse. Partner up. One partner runs (with rock) to dumpster and back while other partner holds rock over head. Alternate arms.
- Drop rocks off in the rock pile, Mosey back to launch and finish with Twister-led Mary for 1 minute
- Close with encouragement and prayer – We own the gloom. This is our opportunity to lead, initiate and shine as light to darkness in this cultural moment
Moleskine
- Humidity really kicked our butts this morning, it was awful and made the rocks and running that much worse. Even with a lighter rock, my arms were tingling at the end of this thing
- Teddy and MT really hit it hard, great work and appreciated you both leading the pack
- Shoutout to Commish for pushing through the heat and pain to stick with the group up (and down) Murderhorn
Need better signage
16 Pax gathered to push themselves in the early morning humidity in an attempt to prepare for one of the most favorite times of the year…Iron Pax. Here’s what went down…DiCCS given (Disclaimer, Cell Phone, CPR, Safety)
Warm Up
Mosey up to Cuthbertson Road and back past COT to Coupon pile to pick up an extra coupon for Loafer, mosey back to start. Moroccan night clubs x11, Cherry Pickers x 11, left stretch, right stretch, calf stretch, upward facing dog, Merkins x11.
Thang
Mosey with Coupon over to the side of Mt. Chiseled. Everyone grab a parking spot, that is your socially distanced sweat collection station for the next 35 minutes.
On mangled piece of cardboard I wrote the following plan for the day.
Round 1
1.) 50 Goblet Squats w/ Coupon
2.) 25 Overhead Presses
3.) 50 Coupon Swings (kettle bell swings w/ coupon)
4.) 25 Merkins on Coupon
5.) 50 Curls
6.) 25 Derkins w/ feet on Coupon
Mosey up to Cuthbertson Road, 1 Burpee, Mosey back to your parking spot. Mary on the 6.
Round 2
1.) 25 Dips on Coupon or curb
2.) 50 Toe Taps on Coupon (2=1)
3.) 25 V Ups
4.) 50 Coupon Chest Presses
5.) 25 Reverse Arm Curls / Regular Curls, your call, with Coupon
6.) 50 Mt. Climbers holding onto Coupon
Mosey up to Cuthbertson Road, 1 Burpee, Mosey back to your parking spot. Mary on the 6.
Round 3
Repeat Round 1 Again until YHC called Halt. Mosey to COT w/ Coupon. LBC’s (about 20) until time.
Moleskin
Not a lot of chatter today, so I think I accomplished my goal. My heart rate was in the 170’s for a good portion of the workout. Should have asked around for a whiteboard, would have served the group much better in being able to read the list of exercises. So, next time reach out to Fusebox who has one for such purposes. On Round 3, most got through at least Merkins (4th exercise), some got through Curls and a select few were into the Derkins. Great push by all. Great to see Two Hand Touch out. Glad to see some of the newer guys like Schnitzel, Golden Plates, Surge and Chatter Box to continue to post and get stronger.
Announcements
See Group Me for opportunity to help make Carbload’s Daughter (Sonia) day special by driving by between 1:30 and 2:00 PM this Saturday to show her some F3Waxhaw support on the celebration of her Bat Mitzvah.
Oct 17 – Blood Drive. 9am to 2pm. Waxhaw American Legion. More details to follow
Continued prayers for those impacted by Covid.
Happy Hour this Thursday, Lawson 5 Five Forks Pool Parking lot, 7:30pm. BYOB, BYO-Chairs, food, etc.
Monday, Sept. 7th – 6:30am Convergence – Cuthbertson Middle School – 1 Year Birthday of F3 Waxhaw. See Group me for more details. Coffeteria to follow.
YHC took us out
Tee-Time in the Dark
It was a dark overcast morning with fog lifting off the course just in time for the 10 PAX to stretch out before their 5:30 Tee-time. We were all waiting……and waiting…….we waited as long as we could for Big Ben, who typically rolls up just in time join the warmup mosey. But we didn’t see the large SUV come barreling and screeching in on its passenger wheels, so we headed out.
Warmup:
- Slightly longer Mosey
- SSH 18 IC
- IW 18 IC
- Calf Stretch S L O W 10 C O U N T
- Downward dog—-into 9 Dry Docks, why not?
- Upward Dog
- Freddy Mercuries 18 IC
The Thang: Headed to the half wall, but we couldn’t find our ball due to it being dark so we had to Audible a bit for safety reasons.
- Dips 36
BoxJump 18Step Ups 18 2=1- Derkin 18
- Repeat
Mosey to Turkey Hunt culdesac:
Start with 5 Burpees, Half way 9 Merkins at end do 36 LBC’s. Come back do 9 merkins half way then repeat once more and ending with 5 more burpees.
Left Turkey Hunt on way to the school trail. At the 4 houses alternate 18 squats and 18 dry docks. We hit the trail to the Back 9, thank god the gates were open this time, but took a little detour to the maintenance area to make sure the structures were sturdy and in working order before the kiddos use them next week. We tested most by each doing 10 pull-ups. All was good to go…
Finally hit the favorite coupon book for a little team work. Grab your favorite coupon from the pile, Partner one runs the back nine, partner 2 does the lifting, then switch till finished.
- 150 Curls
- 50 Hernias V-UP with coupon
- 150 tri-ext
- 150 choice presses (chest/shoulder)
Perfect timing with a minute left to head back to the clubhouse..
Moleskin:
We had a great group today, the 6 stayed with the bulk of the crew the whole way, we were able to actually expand on the original Thang and add a few additional holes to push us further. While we didn’t need a first aid kit, we did have a Pax do his best Peter Griffin imitation as he bumped his knee with a coupon during Hernias. EEEEHHH—AHHHH, EEEEHHH—AHHHH Cough..Dana..Cough..
Announcements:
Carb Load’s Daughter has her Bat-mitzvah this week. She can’t have a party unfortunately, so if you have time later in the week to roll by and honk your horn, it would be appreciated. CL will have to give more detailed info on that.
Blood drive in October
1 year in Sept
IP TBD
2 Q’s this week! see you at the Body Shop Thursday morning at Rea View Elementary..
Me and the Respects
4 pax pulled up at Calvary for another round of Olympus. Everyone (except Cottonmouth) knew what was in store: 400 swings.
Warm up:
- SSH x 20 IC
- IW x 10 IC
The Thang:
- 20 swings, 8 rows per side
- 20 swings, 8 reverse lunges per side
- 10 swings, 15 chest presses per side
Repeato for 8 rounds – 400 swings, 128 rows, 128 lunges, 120 chest presses. The swing count was mixed up a bit with some rounds of 15/15/20, one round of 50 straight, etc.
Finish up with some elbow plank with our final minute, then hustle over to the RZ pax for COT.
Announcements:
- SOB/Area 51 blood drive is coming in early October. Since you need to wait 8 weeks between donations, please don’t give if you might be able to make this blood drive. T-claps to Mighty Mite for his leadership on this front. #FreedToBleed
- Swole and Meathead are going back to 0530 starting on 8/17 to accommodate school schedules for those pax who are fortunate enough to be getting their kids out of the house!
Moleskine:
- It was great to have Cottonmouth join us today. He had threatened to come to some ‘bell workouts soon and finally made it happen. He also regaled us with stories about work travel, book smart salespeople, etc.
- Frehley’s Comet is trying to heal up a knee injury and is crushing the kettlebell workouts lately. He’ll be taking the lead at Meathead tomorrow to give the pax a little taste of some old school strength training knowledge.
- Beeltejuice has also been a regular and is doing well at the bells while mixing in some boot camps. He’s still in the market for a bell (buy or borrow), so reach out if you’ve got any laying around gathering dust.
- Thanks to the pax for joining me this morning. These workouts are grueling and sneaky hard.
Pick ‘Em…Pick ‘Em…Pick ‘Em
34 PAX rolled in this morning and broke out into 3 groups – 17 Pax for Watchtower, 5 for MASH, and 12 for Waxhaw Express. When pulling up you had 3 choices:
- Slinging blocks with
CenterfoldMayhem and others at MASH - Showing off your ET body (pic below for visual) with Waxhaw Express
- Joining Watchtower for a YHC
well plannedQ
If you chose option 3 here is recap of what happened.
Warmup:
- Mosey to front of school buses and circle up
- SSH
- Jimmy Dugans
- Merkins
- Calf Stretch
Thang:
Mosey to neighborhood and start with first cul de sac with start of 7’s – 6 Carolina Dry Docks bottom hill and 1 Heels to Heaven Top. Continue until YHC got bored and audibled about 1/2 way through.
At top waiting on 6 did some extra Mary. Once all are in do few variations of merkins – regular merkins, staggered arm merkins, wide arm merkins.
As group walk brought back a new LRC favorite provided by Heisman – Over Hand Claps, Seal Claps, Pick Cherries (Pick ’em….Pick ’em…), Drop ’em in bucket. Once at next intersection split into 4 groups.
Group 1 and 2 run alternate ways around small loop while doing Indian run. When ever you cross another group, each group does 10 x Bobby Hurley. Groups 3 and 4 start with 10 x Bobby Hurley and then chase Group 1 and 2. Complete 2 laps and meet at start.
At Start do some more Mary with some boat/canoes worked in. Mosey back to first cul de sac and another round of over hand claps, seal claps, cherry pick ’em, and drop ’em in bucket.
Mosey as group back towards school in front of flag. Back in our 4 groups spread out on driveway. Group 1 do burpee Indian run lap, Group 2-4 do various ab exercises until Group 1 return, Group 2 goes and remainder do various leg exercises, Group 3 goes, remainder do various chest/shoulder exercises, Group 4 goes and remainder do various ab exercises. 1:30 left, jail break to COT
Fin
Announcements:
- Freed to Bleed Part Deux being setup by Turnbuckle/Rudy tentatively set for October 17th. More details to come. Can anyone dethrone Loafer as quickest bleeder? Note: SOB/UC Pax are setting up their own drive to try and dethrone F3 Waxhaw for most pints collected. Be ready to raise the bar even further with our 2nd go.
- F3 Waxhaw Conversary scheduled for 9/7. Will have multiple 1st F options for pax to choose from and plenty of 2nd and 3rd F opportunities. If you want to reminisce or see what to expect feel free to read the backblast from last year Launchvergance! –> https://f3southcharlotte.com/2019/09/02/f3-waxhaw-launchvergence-202-pax/
- CPR Training being planned by Turnbuckle/Surge working to secure date/site but be ready to sign up and earn your free chapstick badge.
Moleskin:
- Smithers was concerned when YHC mentioned Indian runs and began to twitch thinking back to few weeks ago when we did various Indian runs and he ended up in 2 man group with Ice9 and got to hear the dry heave up close and personal
- Fusebox made sure to increase awkwardness by insisting on eye to eye contact during squats, not sure if just wanted to see into YHC soul or ensure that I practiced proper form and completed full squat. I think I got him though as he saw neither.
- Sledge-O-Matic earning the “Pain Chain” for push during Indian runs today. Straight up pushing through and digging deep
- Once called for Cherry Pick ’em and Drop ’em in bucket instant flash back to some to Heisman Q. Speaking of which ever since he Q’d Flash he has taken social distancing to an extreme and been MIA. We need you back out there for some more
David GogginYogi Berra type insprational quotes - Posse played the role of Elliot as he appeared to start with Watchtower but decided to chase after the ET bodies of Waxhaw Express for additional mileage
- Got to watch Chastain run and it is like watching a kid navigate a rolling racer flying turtle (pic below for visual). His arms go side to side vs. straight in line to pick up speed. Next time he speeds by you, tell me I am wrong.
No webs….
Wax I was NOT looking forward to Qing today but I didn’t want to let the Chicken man down. On arrival, all the pax were mixed in with the Mashers and not in the normal location under the light pole and I thought, “there is no way we have 20 pax that are injured? Did they know I was Qing and didn’t want to run? So I yell, “Flash is over here” and most of them headed over. Quick DiCCS and let’s mosey.
Warmup:
Slowish mosey to the parking lot beside the stadium.
Circle up!
10 SSH IC
10 IW IC
10 Marocain NC IC
Calf Stretch
10 Merkins CC
10 Plank Jacks IC
10 Peter Parker IC
10 Mountain Climbers
6″ hold
I think we did one or two more but I can’t remember.
The Thang:
Mosey to the top corner of the large parking lot.
4 corners – Deadwood style – Corners #1 -5 burpees #2 -5 Dry docks #3 -5 Squats #4 -5 burpees
Run to the first corner do the burpees and run back to the start.
Run to the second corner but do the burpees at the 1st corner on the way.
Run to the 3rd corner and do corners 1 and 2 on the way and then back…you get the idea.
Quick ab work
40 pistol lbc IC switch legs at 20
Mosey to the center of the lot and circle up
Merkin Wave.
Pax hold a plank until it’s their turn to do a merkin and each pax counts out loud. We had about 18-20 guys so we went to 400. The pax killed it!
Circle of Pain
Stay in the circle. One pax calls an exercise and runs while the pax do it. I called Burpees. #sorrynotsorry
We made is all the way around with about 5 mins to go but I didn’t take into account the 6. They got back about a minute late. I Hooched it or did I?
The Moleskine:
Well done guys! Thanks for following my lead into the gloom and working hard! Shake N Bake pushed extra hard at the end and earned the “Chain of Pain”. Nice work man!
The Serpentine of Doom Abdul
12 Pax joined YHC for a little homage to Delta this morning.
The Thang:
Quick Mosey around the outer perimeter of the Target block.
Warm up –
- Side Straddle
- Imperial Walkers
- Merkins
- Calf Stretch
- Upward Dog
- Downward Dog
The main event today was a little Delta specialty, not often used, the Serpentine of Doom. My goal though was to try to get 3 miles in without leaving the parking lot. So I added a little Paula Abdul to the mix. Grab a partner. Start in one far corner of the parking lot. One partner does the exercise while the other runs to the next island and back, to collect their partner. Both partners then advance to the next island, where the partner who ran first, does the requisite exercise. Three islands or exercise points for each lane, multiplied by 9 or 10 lanes. At one end the Pax perform 10 Side straddles and then Bear Crawl the length of the island, then its 10 more Side Straddles. The middle island in the lane was Merkins and the other end was Burpees separated by the Bear Crawl.
I mean look no matter how simple the directions or plan, or the number of degrees and advance degrees, you just can’t make it simple enough. Today was no exception. There was confusion everywhere.
At the end we started back and did the parking lot in reverse with a few different exercises to change things up. This time we left Paula behind and it was OYO. I think Goodfella may have been the only one to make it all the way through.
Announcements:
First of all it was great to see Radar back out. We had a couple of Mashers, which is always great. Radar’s Mom was just diagnosed with cancer and needs your prayers. Sugar Daddy’s parents were just diagnosed with Covid. I know there was one more but its eluding me. Prayers for all of those as well as the forgotten and unspoken. Blood 🩸 drive in October was mentioned, the need to grab the trash on Cutty (which Dancing Bear did solo) and then stick around for QSource.
Posse led QSource and did a great job talking about vision in leadership. There was great discussion all around. Make sure you get out to QSource and develop your skills, so you raise your own self-imposed lid on your personal leadership.
Cradle to grave….I prayed us out.
Peace
Burnt Ends
Working on my VQ for Ignition was not fun. How could I get the required 4+ miles in with still being within shouting distance of the Gazelles – leading from the back. I knew I had to get off campus to cover some initial miles, but then what? You can’t slow these guys down, you can only hope to contain them.
Start with a mosey to Lawson West and head to bottom of Pinewalk Dr. for various old man stretches, SSH and Merkins.
The Thang –
7’s up/down Pinewalk. Big Boys top and Tysons at bottom – here’s the first ankle weight. At the two driveways up the hill you must broad jump them. (tactic #1 to slow these guys down) – I didn’t work to well as I still end of the line. Kudos to Bottlecap for EXCELLENT form on the broad jumps – all others looked like peter rabbit
Mosey to top of Great Road – 5 Merkins at each driveway on the left/5 Knee Slaps for driveways on the right. (tactic #2 – break up the running—fail)
Mosey back to campus and stop at entrance. Introduced “Burnt Ends” – Idea was to tire out the runners with some longer routines (fail#3- I’m still last)
At entrance 10 Bobby Hurleys/10 Mountain Climbers+15 BH’s, 15 Mnt+20 BH,15 Mtn
Mosey to High School Benches – 10 Step ups,10 Derkins+15 step ups, 15 Derkins,+20 Step ups, 20 Derkins
Mosey to Middle School Lunch Tables – 10 dips,10 knee slaps+15 dips,15 Knee Slaps, 20 dips,20 Knee slaps. I finished up and much to my surprise Glidah was still with me.. and he was looking to throw a form flag – Called some of the dips he saw as Little Baby Dips – LBD
Back to the High School for the final Burnt End – 10 Tysons, 10 Donkey Kicks+15 Tysons,15 Donkey Kicks+20 Tysons,20 Donkey Kicks. This was a smoker and had some (Bottlecap) Reminiscing (Little River Band) about the days when The Amrap started off with 20 Tysons…ah those were the days when we’d go dancing in the dark, walking through the park And reminiscing…
Head to the Middle School Bus Portico for a bear crawl – special note – Ice9 HATES Bear Crawls – he let me know in the 8 years with F3 – He’s never called a bear crawl on his Q (stash this away boys).
3.85 on some newbie Garmin watechs… still need to hit 4… Mosey to COT – circle around lot…4
So for all my “stall ball” dribble out the clock, four corners… nothing I did could slow the Gazelles down – frustrating; but fun to lead from the back of the pack.
It was good to see LRC converging with Waxhaw F3 – Nice work Smithers and Foundation
The vertically challenged crew of speedsters – Dasher, Tool Time, Glidah, Hollywood, Sprinkles and Ice9
Glad to see the 6 Foot+ represent – Gerber and Bottlecap. #tallerTakeLonger
and Special Thanks to Premature – I know he wants to go faster but was pulling me along with encouragement.
Announcements/COT – See Flash – I was day dreaming at this point.
Bells and Boxing
“Every champion was once a contender who refused to give up.” – Rocky Balboa
The formula for the day – 50 swings in 7 min with core exercise between sets.
- 1 min per activity
- 20 swings
- 10 sit-up & press
- 15 swings
- 10 Russian twist w/ bell
- 10 swings
- 10 push-up and kb pull through
- 5 swings
x 54 min (2 min per side) waiter carry
1 min elbow plank
I decided to not subject the pax to my usual punk rock and played the various tunes for Rocky soundtracks. My pax provided some great quotes from the film and some pretty bad Mickey (RIP) impressions. No doubt the Rocky franchise is among the best sports films off time, but Raging Bull is still number 1. (I’ll fight you if you disagree.) For more great pugilist films, check out this list.
Announcements:
Next week Swole and Meathead move to 0530 (same days, same locations). Step up to Q and bring your own flavor to the morning. Get there early for jump rope or yoga.