The Maul – Today’s Episode: How to Smoke a Shoulder…or…Just How Long Is This Parking Lot, Anyway?

The Maul – Today’s Episode: How to Smoke a Shoulder…or…Just How Long Is This Parking Lot, Anyway?

13 lept out of bed to see what was the matter on this gloomy morn’.  With the disclaimer duly given – clear instruction that YHC was not providing any fitness instruction, and that the PAX duly were not paying me to do so, as well as a very lawyerly underscore of each individual (and not F3) assuming maximum liability for any action undertaken (I’m a graduate of the Booyah School of Disclaimers…DM me for college application, I’m the Registrar) – we were off and moseying.

Here’s what happened.

COP

A nice stroll around the parking lot before commencing COP
SSH x25
IW x20
Floyd Mayweathers x15 (Look it up in the F3 exercise dictionary)

The Thang

Mosey to Theater handicapped spots, partner up.  YHC didn’t have a dance partner for the Enchantment Under the Sea Dance, so he shadowed Private Benjamin and Mic Check along the way to see if he could cut in.

• P1 – Forwards bear crawl to the first parking strip, flutter kicks on arrival until P2 bear crawls to first parking strip
• P2 – Flutter kicks until P1 reaches the first parking strip, forwards bear crawl to first parking strip
• P1 – Sideways bear crawl to next parking strip, half on left side, half on right side, Flutter kicks on arrival until P2 arrives at parking strip
• P2 – Flutter kicks until P1 reaches the first parking strip, sideways bear crawl to same parking strip
• P1 – Backwards bear crawl until you reach the end of the parking lot, Flutter kicks until P2 backwards bear crawls to your spot
• P2 – Flutter kicks until P1 reaches the end of the parking lot, backwards bear crawl to same spot – plank up and wait for 6 to finish.

On the way back

• P1 – Lunge Walk to first parking strip, Dolleys on arrival until P2 arrives
• P2 – The opposite
• Repeato all the way back to Theater handicapped spots – plank up and wait for 6 to finish.  Recover

Four corners of Merkin’ around Target & Teeter

• Run to Corner 1 (Jersey Mike’s):  Wide Arm Merks x15
• Run to Corner 2 (back side of Target):  Hand Release Merks x15
• Run to Corner 3 (get your nails done): Regular Merks x15
• Run to Corner 4 (Smoke BBQ): Wide Arm Merks x15

Plank up or run back for the 6, finish with them.  Tclaps to Escobar, Cinnamon, and someone else who I can’t recall for joining me for extra credit run back to sweep the 6.  #Team

After a 10-count that included a few .5s and .75s…we eventually got down to zero…

Mosey over to La Cantina, line up shoulder to shoulder for Planker’s Delight! 13 PAX planked shoulder to shoulder, while each man & his dog went down the line doing two hand slap merkins with each PAX.  That means each did 24 handslap merkins going down the line, then another 24 handslap merkins while shoulder to shoulder for 48 handslap merkins in total…while planking.

Side shuffle down the Dean & Deluca Parking Lot, past the yellow car, do 20 LBCs once you get to the end…plan was for another four corners exercise, but let’s just say that the distance beyond the yellow car was further than YHC had anticipated (or viewed from Google Maps the the night before).

Mosey back over to Smoke for some People’s Chair Merks – Errrbody line up on same wall. One by one, PAX drop and do one hand release merkin all the way down the line and then all the way back up. That’s 2 more merkins each.

That’s 110!  110 merkins in various styles (and in some cases, forms)!  Ah!  Ah!  Ahhhh!  #TheCount

Finito

COT

Name-o-rama and more counting.  Thanks to myself for taking us out.

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