Author Archive Alf

Grab a lifting pumpkin

15 Men posted at Cerberus this morning.  An offer to Q was sent out last night.  No takers.  I reiterated the offer prior to launch.  Still no takers.  That just means you are stuck with me, so deal with it.


Mosey to Whole Foods.  No camp gladiator.  Circle up for SSH.  Call was made to grab a lifting pumpkin from the huge pile in front of the store.  The youngest PAX, Job, reminded us this wasn’t a good idea.  Raising him right Astro!

Mosey around back for Low Slow Squats.  Bank around to the front for IW.

Head to the path and railing behind the bank.  14’s of Decline Merkins and Supine pull-ups.  With nearly 100 reps of each, form was failing quickly.  People’s Chair while everyone finished.

Mad dash to the parking deck and up the ramps.  Line up against the side wall.  Lunge Walk to railing, 10 old school sit ups, reverse lunch walk back to wall.  Repeat for 4 rounds.  Peoples Chair.

Mad dash to the 2nd round-about.  A little mary.  Find a crack (ahem “Expansion Joint”) around the circle and plank up.  10 merkins, plank walk right around circle to next crack, 9 merkins.  Plank walk left, 8 merkins.  Repeat to 1 merkin.

Mad dash to the Bankrupt Mattress Firm (RIP)  20 8-count body builders IC.

Mad dash to cars for 6 minutes of Mary – McGee happily jumped in to cover this.  He loves the official 6MOM at the finish.


Finally the humid 70 degree mornings are gone.  It was great to have a solid group out this morning.  I can say this is my first post ever with two PAX having the same handle.  And both RESPECTS!  A strong effort was provided by everyone this morning has we covered most of the primary areas around Waverly.  One Star is going to need a bigger car if he keeps all this EH’ing up. Welcome Krusty who, like a good boxer, took a good beat down then looked at the PAX, smiled and said, “That’s all you got?”

Thanks to Astro for the take out.


Announcements – Area 51 Christmas Party – December 1st – Seaboards in Matthews.


Asylum – 2nd Edition

2 weeks ago at Cerberus Transporter asked if I would Q his new UCo site starting up.  After I said yes he told me the bootcamp started at 5:15.  I might have changed my answer had a known that.  I enjoy that last 15 minutes of sleep!

Asylum defintion:

  1. the protection granted by a nation to someone who has left their native country as a political refugee.
  2. an institution offering shelter and support to people who are mentally ill.

I am not sure of the intent of the name, but if you came out this morning looking for safe refuge, you didn’t get it.  And to actually do this on your own free will might qualify for the 2nd definition.

The Thang:

Mosey around the building and circle up in the Pet Smart parking lot.  Seriously?  This parking lot needs zones noted on the light poles like Disney World.  How many customers does Pet Smart plan on getting?  Ambitious.

COP:  Some SSH, Low Slow Squats, and Merkins.  Hang out while a few PAX who thought it was a 5:30 start shuffle in.

Mosey back to the vehicles to unload 4 Sandbags and 4 45# plates.

Starting at the intersection for a 3 legged starfish of sorts.  Split up a bit and rotate through each leg.

Leg 1:  Hairburner down about 30 yards, curl the plate 5x, hairburner back.

Leg 2:  Shuffle down about 80 yards, 8-count body builders 5x, shuffle back

Leg 3:  Cary Sandbag 50 yards, thrusters with sandbag 5x, cary sandbag back.

Repeat, but in Round 2 10 reps of each exercise, then 15, then 20, then 25 reps for the 5th round.

Circle up for some LBC’s and freddy mercury with a few minutes left.



I am pretty sure no one finished all the way through Round 5.  It was tough and still way to muggy for October.  Everyone was gaining and I think everyone finished round 4 or got real close.

Good to see Transporter and  Smokey came away with all fingers and no concussions after a head to head collusion on the hair burners.  Certainly this would have been called targeting a defenseless player in the NFL. I am just not sure who was more defenseless.

Radar came in a bit late but made up for the time with a lot of effort in the main event.

Damascus really enjoyed the tough workout.  He may need to be put in an Asylum.

Akbar wisely informed us of his birthday tomorrow after the workout was over.  Too late for burpees but he did more than 39 8-Count Body Builders so we will give him credit.  Happy Birthday.

Good to post with the “other” Radar.  The one who actually posts, unlike the original.

Nice to workout with some of the Western Union guys that also post at Cerberus.


Lots of room at this AO for some adventure.  We only hit a small part of it but with so much open parking lot space you could hit some solid gear workouts like in the days of Olympus.



3rd F at Brooklyn Pizza in Wesley Chapel tonight at 7:30.  Come for pizza, beer, fellowship and faith.


Running and Rocks (Not running w/ Rocks)

Flipper was wise to sign me up to Q on a day he knew he would be elsewhere.  He’s smarter than he looks.

So I had my shot at Rock Zero.  Turns out to be the same day of Isabella Santos race in Ballantyne where Speed For Need brought out the whole armored division for this race.  I ran that race last year, very well done and a great cause.  Anyways.  I wasn’t sure who was going to post vs. running the race.  Turns out we had a sizable group of 14 men who don’t really care about supporting pediatric cancer.  (That’s a joke!!!   But it sounds like a conclusion most of our U.S. Senators would say these days about the other side)

Let’s get into it.

The Thing.

Mosey over to the library and circle up for IW, SSH, and Mountain Climbers.

Head out of library run to Dunkin’ Donuts and back with several stops on the way to plank, Mary, Monkey Hump, and Mountain Climb.

Circle back at the front of the Church and grab a medium sized rock.  Circle up.

Round 1:  25 OH Press, 25 Curls, 25 Goblet Squats, 25 Merkins

Repeat that set every 2:30 for 4 total rounds

Round 2:  25 Tricep Press, 25 Bent over rows, 25 Lat Pulls while lying on six, 25 flutter press.

Repeat that set every 2:30 for 4 total rounds.

Mosey to launch.



I wanted to crush a long rock set today and the only way to do that AND run 3 miles was to just knock the 3 miles out right away.  So we did it, right out of the gate.  Some complaining, but it’s good for you.  The PAX were excited when I got to the rocks and promised no more running, until they just had to stand there and lift rocks.

Was happily surprise to have Spackler out.  Who would have thought that with the Ryder Cup on.  Good to see a couple of relatively new guys in Swiffer and Elsa.  Speaking of Elsa, we had a trifecta of Disney characters today with Mermaid and Marlin also in attendance.  Good work by Elsa, don’t worry you get better at it, just keep coming out.  Thanks to the Site Q’s Boerewors and Hoover to make sure there was no man left behind.

After watching the news out of DC this week, I really want to go through a confirmation hearing.  I want Senators to pull all my backblasts and ask questions like:  “Why do you always talk about Merkins?  I looked up Merkins on the internet and you must be some kind of creepy weirdo perv assaulter for always talking about Merkins.”  If your not sure of the alternate definition of Merkin, don’t look it up at work.


Reach out to Gypsy to put 2019 races on the Speed For Need calendar.

Follow F3Chimpote to hear more about the Mission Trip in Jan/Feb.  Even if you can’t go, there will be an opportunity to donate clothing and other essentials.  Plan is for 50 men to make the trip.  Each man can take 2 suitcase, 80 pounds each, to of donations.  That’s 4 tons of donations headed down there!

Sprockets has his VQ at Hawks Nest on Tuesday.  Come out and Jeer cheer him along.

Thanks to Mermaid for the takeout.




With the promise of McGee out of town I was able to rope in two site FNG’s to WAMRAP Wednesday at Waverly – Woohoo.  They were excited to be there.

A little warm up jog out beyond the Camp Gladiator crew and back to the cars.

The Thang

Every man grab a 50# sand bag from the trunk.  Much excitement now.  Haul it up to the top of the parking deck.  Start the cycle.

Run down staircase 1 and back up.  10 old school sit ups.

Carry sandbag down staircase 2 and back up.  10 bent over rows with bag.

Run down staircase 3 and back up.  Line up on parking line.  2 Merkins, plank walk left one space, 2 Merkins.  At the 5th space turn and plank walk right and repeat.  10 total stops and 20 total merkins.

Run down the ramp, 10 8-Count Body Builders, backwards run up the ramp.


With 3 minutes left we carried the sandbags back to the car.

The Thang.

Strong work out there, everyone kept it pretty much in the red line zone.  No Orange Theory at WAMRAP.  4-5 rounds performed by each of us.  Thanks for the effort Purell and Lex Luthor!

50# sandbags up and down stairs are a smoker.

8-Count Body Builders are Purell’s kryptonite (and bear crawls, but we didn’t do those).  I utilized the short arm advantage here to keep up with him through the circuit.

Lex encouraged us all to grab a ruck and go do a GoRuck Heavy and how easy Selection is if you keep your mind right and just focus on the task at hand.

Thanks to Lex for the takeout.




7 men came out for Cerberus.  I wanted more, but hey, its better than the 2 we had on Wednesday!

The theme of the day was 22.  It’s the most important part of this backblast, but I will come back to that in the Moleskine.

The Thang:

Fast mosey out past the shopping plaza and Camp Gladiator, up the stairs and around the corner to the nice fire pit area of the apartment complex.  Circle up for 22 SSH and IW in cadence.

Had to be too quiet here so mosey out to the back street.  Circle up again for 22 8-Count Body Builders in-cadence.  Seems like these were enjoyed by all.

Fast Mosey up the first circle.  Freddy Mercury.

Fast Mosey to 2nd circle.  Carolina Dry Dock.

Circle of pain.  Partner up.  P1 planks along round-a-about and plank walks counter clockwise.  P2 does 5 merkins, runs around circle and back to P1.  Flapjack and repeat for 2 rounds.

Fast Mosey back up to other circle for flutter kicks and 2nd Circle of pain.  Same as the first except for a different partner and moving clockwise.

Fast Mosey to the bottom of the parking deck.  LBC’s.

New Partner.  P1 runs up left stairs, P2 runs up right.  Meet in middle of top deck for 22 Hand Slap Merkins.  Run back down the stairs you came.  At bottom P1 planks while p2 bunny hops over the legs for 11 reps.  Flapjack plank and hop for another 11 reps.

Repeat the cycle 5 times.

At the top of the deck after round 5 do a series of dragon flags (shout out to Tolkien).

Mosey back to launch and done.


Pax quickly caught on to the #22 this morning.  I let them know it was in honor of someone.  A tough week in the small bubble that is the Lochridge world.  Found out last night that a young woman, 22 years old, who was our go-to baby sitter for 5 years while she was in high school and college had passed away.  She was a fantastic young woman who my daughters really looked up to and adored.  She volunteered to help the sick and elderly, loved god and her church, strong athlete and good student; a great role model for my girls.  While the circumstances aren’t clear, it appears she took her own life.  This is unfathomable to me.   Not that suicide happens, because it unfortunately does, but that it happened to her.  Depression is a black hole and can hit deeply those you would never expect, for reasons you don’t know or don’t understand.  All we can do is seek help when needed and be an active participant in our relationships with friends and family so we can get them help immediately when needed.  I think a few months back Mermaid asked us to go beyond the “How you doing?” question and ask our brothers, “No really, how are you?”  I keep thinking, if someone, anyone, just asked her, “No really, how are you?” maybe she would still be here.

Thats a lot, but there’s more.

My M and I support Alexander Youth Network for children with Behavioral Health issues (thanks to Joker for introducing us to them).  Many of these kids come from challenging family’s where abuse, drugs, neglect, and violence are more normal than you can imagine.  My M is a lunch buddy to a 12  year-old girl there once a week.  The girl is smart, an amazing artist, and street wise beyond her years.  Her mother isn’t fully capable of taking care of her so her Grandmother is her primary care giver.  Her sister committed suicide recently, at a very young age.  Her sister’s suicide is one of the reason’s she is at AYN and that she doesn’t value her own life like she should.  Well this week, her grandmother, her only real stable support in life passed away.  At this point we don’t know where she will end up.   Not sure if there is a capable family member or if she will be put into foster care.

I am sorry this is tough for a Friday.  But it’s real and it’s what is weighing on my heart today.

Please consider these families in your prayers this weekend.  They will need it.  Also consider how you can make an impact on someone else.  Maybe get involved in a cause like suicide prevention or Alexander Youth Network (I can share details).  Or do something with more immediate impact to your sphere of relationships and ask that follow up question:  “No really, How are you doing?”  You can’t imagine the level of impact that might have on someone.

Thanks Das Boot for the takeout this morning.


You all missed and you should try it

The Waverly AMRAP.  The WAMRAP.  It was McGee’s idea but I like it.  Why do I like it?  Well, not going to lie, it’s close to my house.  But I really like the idea of being able to go all out for a workout if I want, and we should all do that at least 2x per week.  By design, most of our bootcamps have stops and starts to transition between activities but sometimes it’s best to just get after it, and a tightly grouped AMRAP still keeps the leaders and the six in the same vicinity.

The last reason I like it – the location is great to try to pull together the A51, SOB and UCo PAX.

So once again McGee and I, were out by ourselves, on a mission to get better.  We did a loop, the loop took about 5 minutes a cycle and in total we each covered the following:  3 miles, 42 flights of stairs, 175 calf raises, 140 jump squats, 105 Box cutters, 140 RDL’s, and 35 burpees.   A little mary and merkins for a closer.

Next week McGee will be in Ireland with his M.  If you don’t like McGee it would be a great week to try it!  If you don’t like me, then try it anyway.  It will be good for you.

HC while supplies last!  There may never be a deal this good again.



Moist morning at Area 51. Maybe even damp.

6 men posted for this mornings Area 51 workout.  Site Q’s were well represented.  Maybe they didn’t trust me and both Huggie Bear and Abacus posted to make sure I didn’t take this thing sideways.  We had 50% Hokies with Joker and Turkey Leg joining me.  O’Tannenbaum rounded out the bunch heading in on 2 wheels right on schedule.

Weak disclaimer with a bunch of veterans around.

Mosey out to sidewalk and down past the track.  Circle around into the bus lot for a quick COP.  Standard fare:  SSH, IW, and Merkins.

Head back across campus to the rock pile.  Grab a lifting rock and bring it back to the entrance of the soccer field parking lot.

5 reps of Curls, OH Press, and Tricep extensions.  Head to playground

5 Pullups and 5 Split Leg Squats (each leg).  Head to wall by school entrance

5 Donkey Kicks, People’s Chair with 50 OH presses.  Head to track.

5 Decline Merkins on the bench, 5 Step ups (each leg), Hot lap around the track.  Mosey back to rocks.

Now, on your own pace repeat for 4 more laps, doing 10, 15, 20 and 25 reps of each exercises.  With the exceptions being pull-ups – 7, 9, 11, 13 and the People’s Chair stayed at 50 air presses.

A little Mary at the end until the PAX was in.  Everyone was pretty smoked and we still had 15 minutes left.

At rocks do 2 rounds of 15 Good Mornings, 15 Tea Bag Squats and 15 Lougaines

Take rocks back.  Plank work by the cars to finish out the last 2 minutes.


Strong work by everyone today.  Joker said he was broken by the end of the 5 cycles. Temps weren’t that high but humidity sure was.  PAX were drenched in sweat, time to hydrate.

As promised I kept everyone of the muddy, swampy fields and kept things on the pavement for the most part.

Thanks to Abacus for the takeout this morning and for the invitation to lead out here.


Stoppage Time

11 Men showed up for Fast Twitch this morning.  2 of them showed up 15 minutes early to swing KB’s with Hops, Bulldog, Busch and Bananas, and all men were in the same parking spot.  It was 2015 all over again.

We peeled off Rachel and Purell from the KB’s, gave a weak disclaimer and off we went.  I had 2 plans in mind and decided to head right on Providence and save the mystery of the left turn and route for another day.

The Thang:

Head South on Providence and take a right into Berkeley where we mosey through on our way to Ballantyne Commons.  Prohibition helped guide the way and reminded the Q that it was well past time for Imperial Walkers.  So we stopped.  Did some IW’s and a plank with 6″ hold.  Off again.  Right on Ballantyne Commons and a Right on Woodview.

Head to the top of the hill about ¾ of the way down.  From here do Triple Nickel, but with double the exercises.  So 5 runs down to the cul-de-sac for 10 Jump Squats and 5 runs back up with 10 Romanian Deadlifts at the top.  Fast guys get an extra half or full hill run to catch the six.  (you can thank me tomorrow for the RDL’s). I am fairly certain this place is the missing 6th Knoll.  It’s a steep little sucker.  10%+ grade according to Strava.

Head back out to Ballantyne Commons and thorough Berkeley.  Enough time to head down to the base of Alexa.  Where poor instructions and perfect execution of said poor instructions led to PAX all over the place.  It’s basically a circle, except that the two ends of the circle hit about 100 yards apart.  Oops.  After a few minutes we collected everyone and high tailed it back to the lot.  7 minutes of stoppage time that you don’t have to pay extra for.  Apologies for the tardiness.


After 5 years of Fast Twitch at SCMS we had all pretty much learned all the routes and roads like the back our our hand.  (Even though Haze Q’ed the exact same Windbluff to Rising Meadow course EVERY TIME.)  The change to Latin has opened up some new territory to explore and sometimes Explorers experience unintended consequences.  See:

So we were a few minutes late on the way home, but on the plus side we suffered no decapitations, poison arrows, or cannibalism.  Although Purell’s gas and the scent of Pro’s Paco’s Tacos and Tequila almost did us in.

Rosey taunted Purell to run real fast.  And they did.  Rachel and Uncle Rico weren’t far behind and Astro made sure not to let the young whipper-snapper to far out of eyesight.  Good to see Hammer found the correct parking lot and joined us this week.  Pop-Tart ran strong and was upset by the lack of push ups.  Margo and Purple Haze grinding out the miles as always.

Thanks to Astro for the strong takeout.



Uncle Rico’s Brown Bag will be hosting a fundraiser (Next Thursday?). I believe he said the worthy cause was for Hunter Syndrome.  Look for further details from Uncle Rico

There will be snow cones!  Bring your own liquor if you want “adult” snow cones.  See Prohibition if you need an airplane bottle or seven.

Two Truth’s and a Lie – The part about the snow cones is true.  I made up the whole “adult” snow cone thing.  Don’t do that.  At least not at the fundraiser.  The part about seeing Pro for airplane bottles is the second truth.


I think I blacked out after the snatches

Sorry for the delayed post.  I have a 99% same day post rate, but couldn’t make this one happen.  Here it is now!

9 men showed up for the first half of the Alf double feature on Thursday.  Meathead 0.0 was on tap.  I knew I had GhostRunner later that evening so went easy on the legs and decided to smoke the upper body.

Disclaimer was given at the last moment as PAX came in on two wheels.  I think guys know they don’t have to be early to Meathead because it’s always easy to find us.

Warm up – 2 handed swings, halos’s, prying squats, imperial walkers, more swings, more halo’s, more prying squats.

The Thing:

OYO – 25 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 20 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 15 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 10 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 5 2-handed swings, 10 markins.

A little mary until the 6 is done.

OYO – same as above but replace 2-handed swings with Snatches (both Right and Left)

(Note:  I did the snatches early while everyone still had grip strength, but 150 snatches was a smoker and the weinke went rogue after this.  I might have blacked out, or maybe I should have.)

OYO – 25x lawn mowers (Right and Left), 10 lat pulls (on back pulling bell over head).  Repeat for the 20-10-15-10-10-10-5-10 series like above.

OYO – Sumo Dead Lift High Pull and merkins 25 down to 5 again.

Some mary and flutter with press in-between.

5 sets of 10 tricep presses, 10 OH presses, and 10 curls

Finish with:  OYO – 25 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 20 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 15 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 10 2-handed swings, 10 merkins, 5 2-handed swings, 10 markins.



You know when a workout has 250 merkins and that’s the easy part, you are likely in trouble.  The men put in the work today.  Mumble chatter was completely extinguished after and during the snatch set.  Not sure if everyone got in all the snatches but everyone was working hard to get as many as possible. Good to see Mall Cop back out and working post on a regular basis.  Chin Music was a little quieter without Header there to talk with.  Rachel and Purell were there (I know, weird that they were at the same workout).  They brought two bells each and I don’t think either of them bothered with the lighter bell.  Strong work.  Blazing Saddles was the first man on the scene and doing a little pre-work KB warm up when I arrived.  He may have regretted that choice later on in the workout, but he is better for it.  Prohibition and Soul Glow were quietly getting the work done as well.  Pro may have been dying inside.  Hard to tell.  Orange Whip seemed excited about the snatches and like the challenge because it was something he wouldn’t attempt on his own at home.  Aye – that’s why we are here, to push each other farther than we would go on our own.

Thanks to Chin Music for the takeout.

Likely some announcements, that are irrelevant now that the day has past.

Keep Utah’s family in your prayers as his father passed away this week.



Excessive nagging

8 men posted up at Area 51 this morning.  The grounds were saturated and steam was rising from the fields.  It wouldn’t take long to break a sweat.

At first it looked like a small crowd with just 3 of us at the starting point, then in the last 90 seconds a caravan of 5 more cars pulled in.  A brief disclaimer for a bunch of vets and off we were heading out towards the firehouse, making the first left into the neighborhood.

Circle up for SSH, then mosey to the end of the street.

Circle up for some IW.  I got distracted with the mumble chatter and forgot that I was the Q and had to call cadence.  Lets just say we did some of these.

Mosey on through the back entrance to the fields and up onto the back lot.  Circle up for merkins and mountain climbers.

Mosey to the field.  Going the full distance for the beast.  6 merkins at the first light post, 6 merkins at the 2nd light post and 6 on the sidewalk on the other side.   Repeat on the way back.

By this point I had heard enough of the nagging, talk back, plans for a coup, and downright mutiny because the shoes got a bit wet and muddy.  So we moved the remainder of the beast over to the pavement.  Jump Squats, Dry Docks, Lunges, Monkey Humpers, and the burpee finisher.

Mosey over to the track.  Stop at the wall for some peoples chair and arm raises while we wait for a woman to finish her lap and move off the track.  At the track partner up.  P1 runs the loop and catches up to P2 who is broad jumping down the track.  Repeat for 2 laps each.  Again.  More complaining about broad jumping.

Mosey over to the tires in the back of the school.  25 full sit-ups.  run down to the railing on the path ~50 yards and dow 25 merkins.  Come back for 20 sit-ups and back to 20 merkins.  Repeat for 15, 10 and 5.

Back around the school so we didn’t get our feet wet.  Plank with feet on the wall.  A couple of rounds of 6″ with feet on the wall.

Over to the playground for the Joker special:  10 pull-ups, 20 jump squats and 30 dips.  Two times through.

Circle up for Mary:  Freddy Mercury, Dolly, Glue Bridge, LBC, LBC Right, LBC Left



You know who complained?  The fast guys Joker and McGee.  Joker who wears a white shirt and new shoes to a muddy AO and then complains.  McGee, at 32, is apparently too old to get dirty.  You know who didn’t complain?  The Respects, O’T and Beaver.  In fact O’T smoked everyone on the burpee section of the Beast and Beaver was one of the only guys to do broad jumps his whole turn on the track – and he had his hip replaced last year.

Turkey Leg was hanging around and working hard, still working out 6 days a week while trying to recover from a pulled groin and knee issues.  High Tide came out to McKee Road for his first time EVER.  He had never been to Area 51 or The Matrix.  Welcome out, you should come back again sometime.  Huggie Bear held down the fort for the site Q’s as Abacus was out on some personal business this weekend.

All in all, a great workout and a lot of sweat was soaked into all our shirts this morning.  Thanks for joining me this morning.