Quarantine Breakout Tailgate Pre-Blast
“As we are now in Phase 2 and nearing Phase 2.5 it is time for some good ol in-person fellowship. Bring your bag chairs and favorite beverage and join your F3 brothers in a socially distanced tailgate next Saturday 6/13. Taco Stand has graciously offered to host the tailgate in his cul-de-sac at 6507 Coral Rose Road 28277. He is the only house in the cul-de-sac so basically it will be like high school where a bunch of cars met in an open field and burned tires and played music (don’t tell me that only happened in small town S.C.). The festivities start at 4:00 and go until Taco starts challenging everyone to sprints.
We will have some appetizers and if you are comfortable sharing food feel free to bring something. No pressure as this is meant to be a laid back gathering with people able to socially distance as much as they like. Mainly we want to just kick back up human interaction. Also, feel free to bring M’s and 2.0’s as you would like…or if you have had 3 months of together-time and need a solo event then cool. There is a pond there too so fishing poles are also encouraged.
I think that hits on about everything but if there are any questions reach out to War Eagle, Mary Kay or Taco Stand. Looking forward to hanging out with you guys.”
Jack Webb fartsacked.
Once upon a time, there was a workout called The Rock. Upwards of 40 or 50 pax could be found under & amidst the south Charlotte Saturday morning gloom. The goings on at this AO even were chronicled on local television. Those goings on were bootcamp workouts. Once thought to be extinct or, at the very least, no longer to be found in its former south Charlotte habitat — the experts were wrong. Bootcamp workouts, albeit on the endangered species list, are not extinct.
This morning at RockZero (nee The Rock, prior to a forced and uncomfortable prearranged re-marriage with DayZero after they left the relationship a couple years earlier) 17 men confirmed that the bootcamp workout is alive and still sitting up and taking nourishment. A la Marlon Perkins and Jim Fowler on Mutual of Omaha’s “Wild Kingdom”, Runstopper & YHC took the pax on a safari across the Calvary expanse (actually we didn’t range very far at all) to prove that the bootcamp workout is still alive. By the way, do you remember how Perkins used to send Fowler on the most harrowing tasks while he just sat back in the elevated safari vehicle and prattled on? Good humor.
Anyway, suppose some account of what happened should be included, so here’s a blend of Moleskinny & Thang:
TL was LIFO, we circled back a bit to pick him up after a weak disclaimer that included no mention of Covid.
COP consisted of the Sprinkler (stole that from Circuit City’s Q at RY on Thursday). I just can’t stand to look at the atrocious form when IW’s are called. No SSH’s, of course. We did some slow squats, a few burpees, some flutters..and some other stuff.
Then ran over to one of the lots for some bearcrawls, lunge walks (including back’ards), burpee broad jumps, etc.
Over to the picnic tables near the kitty litter. The hotbox was full of crows and/or ravens picking the flesh from some carcass….hope it wasn’t human.
Anyway we did some Little Baby Haze’s. Flipper adroitly corrected me when I called what I was doing step up’s. Thanks for the assist. See…I’m coachable. Also did some incline merkins, though my co-Q and others were doing dips & Derkins and perhaps other stuff. Choose your own Weinke, fellas.
Moseyed over to the pavilion for some people’s chair, overhead press, some little baby arm circles – forwards and back’ards, and some Moroccan Night Club’s. Thanks to Snowflake for the assist on the name for those sneaky little bastards.
Runstopper’s turn. He, of course, took the pax immediately over to the rock filled bridge over the gunch down the hill from the kitty litter. While many were expecting an appearance from Mr. Webb, alas, Jack never showed. The pax did, however, carry the rocks for the remainder of the workout. We did a bunch of stuff with the rocks – lots of old school sit ups, lunge walks – forwards and back’ards, flutter press, and some other nameless exercises that I’d never done before and will likely have me cursing under my breath this evening and all day tomorrow. Thank you very little, Stopper.
We went less than 2 miles. 1.89753 miles was the official tally. You’re welcome. Did I mention bootcamps are not extinct?
Now for some sundry moleskinnish observations:
- Mallcop was exhorted by a few to join the festivities but he was AWOL #epsteinsmother
- Spackler, aka Sparkles according to his M, posted and then doubled on over to White Claw
- Snowflake ran in #machine
- Floorslapper was on time again. Weird.
- Beaver and his bionic (or reconfigured?) hip continue to show up and put in the hard work.
- Cottonmouth produced a first for YHC as Q…perhaps a first for anyone. During the People’s Chair work at the pavilion, he actually took a call from his daughter and spoke to her for a couple minutes. Also weird. Don’t do that again.
- Geraldo did not offer YHC any cinematic or 70’s/80’s pop culture trivial information, but he did appreciate YHC’s reference to Fletch after IH was describing his doctor’s diagnosis of his abdominal perturbulence: “I don’t seem to find anything wrong with you, Mr. Babar.”
- Schmedium was putting in the hard work while still quarantined in Charlotte rather than Houston. At least the humidity’s better here…..yeah, right.
- IHOP & Slingshot eschewed the social distancing mombo-jombo and clowncarred to the morning’s festivities. T-claps. Also learned Slingshot used to be Cottonmouth’s boss. Also potentially weird.
- The “respectful” Spaceballs, FNG last week, was back and also worked in a post at Anvil this week. 3 times in 8 days – T-claps, brother. Keep coming out.
- Strawberry traveled way north, which is to say 3.5 miles or so, for an Area51 post. Welcome back, brother.
Alright, that’s enough of this. I’ll close with this. As I prayed in COT, I am thankful for this fellowship, this brotherhood. There’s a story in the Bible written by a dude named Luke. It’s an exchange between another dude named Jesus of Nazareth and an expert in Jewish law. It may be familiar to some of you, and it’s known familiarly as the parable of the “Good Samaritan”. Luke 10: 25-37. I commend it to you, men. Notice the context in which Jesus tells this parable, and ask yourselves how that may apply to us in America, and the whole world for that matter. “Who is your neighbor?”
Thankful for you, men. It was a privilege to Q alongside Runstopper this morning, and it was a privilege and joy to pray for all of us, too.
It’s Time To Get Uncomfortable
After being on quarantine hiatus from F3 workouts YHC realized it was time to get out of the routine I created for myself of solo running/workouts and get back out in the gloom with fellow PAX (at a socially safe distance of course). Not knowing how many PAX would show I set out some extra coupons just in case but alas they were not needed… oh well. YHC got a 2.5 mile pre-run in before the main event. As PAX began to pull in it felt more like normal which was a good thing. It was launch time, some verbal HCs were nowhere to be found (you know who you are), a disclaimer about safety was given and off we went…
The Thang
Mosey down the hill to parking lot next to Lock Ness for warmup – 15 SSHs; 10 IWs; 10 merkins. In the middle of warmup a car pulled up, honked and threw some fliers out the window for us (1 for each of us which was thoughtful)… out of pure curiosity YHC ran over after warm up to see what they said – It was something about Jeffrey Epstein “truth”… Thanks for the PSA random car!
After the completely random distraction off we went again… mosey to the rock pile for lifting rock selection. Overhead walk the coupon to the Campbell’s Snack lot (I agree Cul-de-sac it should be Lance!). Each PAX in their own parking spot as to be socially distant and we got to work.
First Round – 20 reps of curls, overhead press, and tri-extensions; run to wall and back 3 times
Second Round – 20 reps of squats, lunges, and 10 reps 3 count bunny hop into CDD; run to wall and back 3 times
Mosey over to Bagpipe hill (leaving lifting rock behind) – at the bottom 10 merkins, run to bridge 40 LBCs – 3 times
Mosey to frontdoor of Campbell’s building for some dips and then mosey back to our lifting rocks
Third Round – 10 reps of curls, overhead press, and tri-extensions; run to wall and back 3 times
Fourth Round – 10 reps of squats, lunges, and 5 reps 3 count bunny hops into CDD; run to wall and back 2 times (as time was fading needed to get back to launch)
Overhead carry the lifting rocks back to rock pile and mosey back to launch, stopping to read the Epstein “literature” again. With 5 minutes to spare we arrived back at launch to find Airwolf (sorry we missed you at launch but see you next week!). Closed with a Mary around the horn – Freddie Mercury, Heels to Heaven, J-Lo, Flutters, and Chippycross.
Announcements
Kudos to Cul-de-sac and Lex Luthor taking over site Q from Wild Turkey and Nard Dog (t-claps to those 2 for their service)… Stonehenge will need Qs so please sign up.
In an effort to get out of my comfort zone YHC did the take-out – my request is, that as F3’s calling for male leadership in the community, we all start to get out of our comfort zones – the status quo isn’t leading…. we all need to listen, not to have a response, but to hear each other and those in our communities. Whether we agree with it, we believe it, or we like it there are people in our community who are hurting… we need to start hearing them.
This is FUN! We’re having FUN!!
5 men gathered to help bring the Brave back to life, and sweat all over the damn place.
Mosey around the parking lot for a minute and circle up for COP:
- SSH x 25
- LSS x 15
- IW x 15
- Slow Merkins x 10
- MC x 15
Mosey to corner of Ballantyne Commons and Community House.
Thang
- Run North on Community House to Endhaven (1 mile). At every side-street / entrance on the way (8 total), stop for jump squats. Start with 2 reps and increase by 2 at every station, for 72 reps total.
- Take a right on Endhaven and run to the last neighborhood on the right (1 mile). At every side-street / entrance on the way (8 total), stop for mary. We did something like a Chippy Cross, but with lowering your legs back to 6-inches in between each toe touch. Start with 2 reps and increase by 2 at every station, for 72 reps total.
- Then run the route in reverse, using the same format. On Endhaven do merkins. On Community house do burpees. It was worse than it sounds.
Mosey back to launch. 2 minutes of mary with each of us calling out 10-15 reps of an exercise one at a time rapid fire.
Moleskin
Loved the group we had this morning. We stayed together throughout, with some good banter about how much “fun” we were having. The title of this BB is a direct quote from Mario. YHC can’t emphasize enough how horrible the last mile w/ 72 burpees was in that heat. It didn’t help that the last few stations were close together. It definitely took a bite out of all of us. Kudos to the pax for not refuseniking. Teddy is working his way back and looked quite strong. Softie was out leading the pack for a good portion, Wingy had beard envy and Mario almost pooped himself during AND after the workout. We must have looked pretty banged up after COT because a vulture was giving us the eye. Apparently the same thing happened last week. It might take one of us out eventually, but we must accept that. It’s the circle of life.
Swarm AMRAP x 2
14 sweaty dudes . . . THE END! You know I can’t do a short backblast. Texting with Dasher last night about ideas, he actually mentioned a workout idea that was my backup weinke for this past week’s Ignition. So that must be a sign, let’s do it!
WARMUP:
- DCCS recited including the COVID disclaimer about #SweatPilePolicing . . . But that made me think, when was it EVER ok to lay down in another man’s sweat pile?
- Mosey to Bus loop
- SSH x 15, Merkins, PP, Merkins, MC, Merkins, Plank Jacks, Squats
FIRST AMRAP:
- 15 minutes around “The Original” course
- 15 of each at various stops: Derkins, Bomb Jacks, Al Gore Front Shoulder rock raise, Mike Tysons
- 1 hand release knee slap burpee for every lap completed
- 5 laps completed for all
SECOND AMRAP:
- 15 minutes on “The Hill” course
- 4 runs up the hill (sideways left, sideways right, backwards, and straight), 15 BTW shoulder taps, 15 donkey kicks against HS wall
- 1 hand release knee slap burpee for every lap completed
- 4 laps completed for all
THIRD AMRAP THE BUS LOOP:
- Partner up for lap around bus loop
- When you meet, 5 hand release knee slap burpees
- Sprint every other light pole back to COT
MOLESKINE:
- The plan was three 15 minute AMRAPs but ran out of time due to some moseys and mary
- Tool Time and Dasher killed it out front all day . . . Dasher even had time to complain about how easy the workout was
due to him modifying the exercises - Kudos to Premature for getting out of his comfort zone and making another appearance at the hour long workout . . . Well done brother!
- Good to have Smithers back . . . At least that is what this skinny guy is calling himself
- Deflated with gas left in the tank on a few of the late runs . . . Must have heard the also skinny Foundation compliment Smithers and got jealous
- Speaking of skinny guys, who is the guy claiming to be Nails . . . The puffy jacket has been replaced with the skin shirt
- It’s about time Sprinkles made his way back to the hour long workout scene . . . And glad to see he is under the tutelage of Zinfandel as they were both offering great encouragment/compliments to the Q today
- Fellow Waxhaw Express teammates Easy Button, Gerber, Hollywood, and Glidah continue to push hard . . . it’s
awfulawesometo be looking at your backshave you guys at workouts
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
- ACKBAR: Union UMC is collecting kid-friendly food items and toiletries to be given out. The weekly Thursday food pantry (giving items in addition to the regular groceries for our beautiful guests). This drive will last for 2 weeks, and the donation boxes are near the entrance to the sanctuary, to keep it out of the rain. The following items are needed: Toiletry items: shampoo, soap, toothpaste, toilet paper, toothbrushes, tissues. Kid Friendly Foods: individual servings of chips or crackers, fruit snacks, applesauce, PB & Jelly, fruit cups, Mac and cheese, etc. Anything that would fit in a lunchbox. We will collect for the next couple of weeks.
- DASHER: Spartan race Saturday June 27th at Cuthbertson. This should be a fun but challenging workout for all PAX with great 2nd F opportunity. Signup in GroupMe under Calendar to let him know how many are attending.
- ZIN: National Donut Day
but nobody got the details cuz Mad Dog didn’t care - MAD DOG (and others): Great recap of yesterday’s rally but more importantly about how we look to go forward as individuals and make changes in our lives and our circle of influence
YHC prayed us out with an appreciation for this week’s events/conversations and an ask for wisdom for our actions in the coming weeks
Technically there were no “burpees”; a/k/a who’s sore after that one?
Another Q, another chance to try out loads of new exercises and routines. Today focused on the burpee – actually, variations of the burpee. As promised to Semi-Gloss, less mileage, more exercises. Disclaimer given, 12 PAX left Amelie’s behind for the CCHS campus and lope up the 1/2 ramps to the top floor of Tartarus.
COP (all in cadence)
SSH x 25
Sprinklers x 15 (let the record show it was Centurion that re-introduced this exercise to Area 51 several months ago; also let the record show this is one of the fundamentals at Whiteclaw (Saturdays at 8 am at Wesley Church))
Grady Corn x 15 (arms out front, arms out to side (like a “T”), arms above shoulders to make a triangle, arms back to side, arms back to front (thats 1).
Steve Earle x 10 (slow slow copperhead squat + hillbilly)
SUPER DUPER COOLERS. How to even explain. Side plank (eg facing the right), right leg high, right leg down, right leg into chest, right leg back (thats 1) x 10 5 merkins, then side plank facing left x 10. Looks ridiculous and the security footage from the deck is surely on Bar Stool already. But effective. Like, super effective. Like, super duper effective.
WHAT HAD HAPPENED WAS
Run down the stairs outside one corner of the football stadium (*2017, 2018 & 2019 3A State Champs). Task is simple: one lap around the stadium. At each corner, perform 5 burpee variations:
- burpos (when you’re too lazy to stand); as PAX pointed out its 75% a burpee, so petitioning a name change to “burps”)
- WalMart burpees (roll back!)
- Slurpees (a/k/a double merkin burpees which we can all agree is a lame a/k/a)
- Donkey kick burpees which I made up and so have decided to call Ass Burps.
After lap meet in the lot f/k/a where we used to park for Centurion. Line up abreast with bear-pees on the line up. That is a bear crawl + burpee combo (4 bear crawl steps, merkin). Across the lot. For those of you who did not partake in Centurion -that feeling you have right now? Its jealousy.
Second lap around the stadium – this time at each corner, 10 jump variations:
- tuck jumps
- star jumps
- jump squats
- spiderman 180 jumps
Back to the former parking lot. Line up abreast. LL Cool Js this time. Lunge, lunge, pick the “Cool” exercise, and then broad jump. In this case we did squats. As in “hey, what do we do after the 2 lunges?” “A squat”. “Ah, cool.”
Trot back over to Tartarus stairwell 1. Toe taps on the curb all the way to stairwell 2.
Time for dominoes! All PAX line up and side plank on the curb; left arm high. First PAX does 5 merkins and holds regular plank. Next PAX drops his left arm, does 5 merkins, holds plank. And so on down the line. Once all PAX complete, all PAX then side plank right arm high. The PAX that was last to do the 5 merkins then does another 5 merkins, and the succession moves back in the other direction.
In my mind we looked like this:
Knowing this was 100% under control, we jogged back to launch arriving at exactly – wait, let me check that again – oh yeah, that’s what I thought. 6:15 am.
MOLESKIN
Mermaid, Margo, Dory (and sometimes their kids!) and I had been meeting at Amelie’s nearly 6 x a week since since March. We were rarely more than 4 PAX; sometimes, just 2 of us. We had rain, cold, warmth, you name it – we even stopped on the roof of the deck for sunrise on Easter morning. It’s great to see everyone out again.
I texted Mermaid this morning to ask if maybe I was the only one really sore (quads, hips) – but was glad to hear he was equally afflicted. So if anyone else is feeling a little tender, you’re not alone.
Big day for Semi at the pool today. He’s been waiting for this all week.
Uncle Phil got us on a funny conversation about the Exicon which lead to a discussion, of all things, on the King James. I noted that King James was a renowned trash-talker back in the day, and I’ll never forget learning in a college history class how he called tobacco the “noxious weed”. Honestly I think that is the fact I remember most. #DukeUniversity (that and the phone number for Wild Bull Pizza – Floorslapper amirite?)
Bout Time’s M (Lauren) has been nominated for “Woman of the Year” by the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. The story about their son, Jennings, is inspiring. If you’d like to hear more or help out by making a donation, use the link here: https://pages.lls.org/mwoy/nc/clt20/jpalmer
YHC did the take out, noting it was more of a statement than a prayer. I had heard the other day someone saying that often times we have a mindset of “I have to” – I have to go to work tomorrow; I have to run these errands; I have to get up and work out; I have to go to church. Instead what if we changed “have” with “get” – I get to go to work tomorrow, I get to wake up early and work out tomorrow; I get to go to church. Maybe a change in our mindset amidst our local, national and global landscape now might be a step in the right direction to understanding how lucky and how blessed we are.
Freaky Friday
Brothers, we are living in crazing times. It’s been a struggle for me personally and professionally over the last several months. Always great to hang out with my brothers on a (Carolina) blue morning and sweat, grunt, and laugh.
Since this was only my 2nd queue, I camped out (just kidding, inside joke) on campus starting at 9:00 pm. Had coffee with 3 security cards at 3:15 am, started setting up at 4:30 am, and stressed from 5:00-6:00 how the workout would go.
My 6 brothers were great sports and agreed to “disrupt” (verbiage from Q Source) our normal routine and challenge ourselves.
Why Freaky Friday? Multiple stations were set up and each brother had 3 options to tailor their workouts to their needs. The Timer performed a Farmer’s Carry with two 30 lb weights around the islands. Once the loop started, the pain began. Once the loop ended, the pain set in.
Exercises (if the Lexicon isn’t correct, asking for grace. Learning day to day):
-In chairs with bricks, isolated curls, zombies (hold bricks straight out), push outs (push bricks out, to chest, up, back down, repeat), and beer cans as a group.
-Station 1- With ball, choice of wide grip presses, close grip presses, or skull crushers. Brutus rocked the skull crushers. Only one to try it.
-Station 2- Dips between 2 chairs, isolated curls, or beer cans
-Station 3-With sand back, kettle bell swings or front shoulder presses
-Station 4- Low slow squat or goblet squat with coupon
-Station 5- Pick a F3 card. If 1-5, do exercise x3. If 6-10, do exercise x 2. If facecard, go to Vegas. For some reason, Chastain kept drawing monkey humpers. Think he kept the card as he went around the stations.
-Station 6- Irkins or dirkins on coupon.
-Station 7- Mash/4077 station with first aid kit, doctor’s military bag, canteen, and sanitizer. Heels to Heaven, dolphin kicks on ball, plank, downward dog, camel kicks, etc.
Draper, great job coming back. We missed you.
Turnbuckle, you always make me smile when you come in the parking lot on 2 wheels with music kicking.
Sledge-o-matic, 5 days this week. Great job.
Centerfold, loved the Tarheel shirt. You get MVP today.
If you haven’t led a queue, try it. Your brothers WILL SUPPORT YOU! If it’s your first time, contact me personally. Mayhem will be there to cheer you on.
Peace out!
At the playground…
Technically, this is still an exploratory site — should YHC even write a backblast for it? It is with an abundance of caution, that he does…
WARM-UP
Minute mosey.
- Goofball x 20 IC
- Hillbillies x 19 IC
- Morroccan Night Club x 18 IC
- Mountain Climber x 21 IC
- Windmill x 14? IC
THE THANG
Head to the lower playground and grab a random ball from the ground. Run the track and at the
- 1st corner – 10 merkins with right hand on the ball (bonus points for dribbling with hands or feet between stations)
- 2nd corner – 10 merkins with left hand on the ball
- 3rd corner – 10 merkins with both hands on the ball
- 4th corner – 10 merkins with feet on the ball
2 laps of that and then gather on the court for a Febreze
- 2 BB sit-ups, raise feet and do 10 chest presses with the ball
- Then 4:20, 6:30, 8:40, and 10:50
Repeato on the ball time above, except Febreze was shortened to just rounds of 2:10 and 10:50.
Say goodbye to your ball and mosey to the parking lot entrance.
Run four light poles up and at each one, do 10 Carolina Dry Docks. Around the 4th pole, there are rocks — grab one.
- Run the next 4 light poles and at each do 10 curls, 10 air presses, 10 tricep extensions.
- At the long gap between the final pole and Rea Road, walk with the rock above your head.
- Return to the rock pile, stopping at each light pole for 10 bent-over rows.
5 burpees at three light poles on the way back to COT.
MOLESKINE
YHC was quite humbled by the stellar turnout this morning for the site possibly to be known as The Body Shop (thanks to the opportunity last week to change the tire of a school employee after the workout was done). Men ranged from 2.0 to Double Respect, and 5 MASHERs did some strong work each time the rest of the group passed by — it is not known what was going on at others times. PAX traveled across the county line into the wilderness of Unincorporated Waxhaw without the promise of coffeeteria, a session of Q Source, or an 0715 happy hour. There was a deer sighting just before launch, further adding to the rural feel of the AO.
The PAX were excited to play with balls but that soon changed and the grumbling started as men realized the balls were not well inflated, thus more difficult to balance on and dribble. YHC is known for digging into the depths of the Exicon and today’s round of The Febreze was an unexpected bit of torture — who knew you had to work those hip flexors more often? Some of the newer guys realized they haven’t spent enough time on their 6 and may be soft there. The shoulders were burning with the rock work.
And, just as 95% of garages and shops operate, this job finished later than expected, rushing to finish just a little later than the guaranteed 45 minutes.
YHC with the take-out.
Hump Day!!!!!!
Warm-up lap with Sprinkles and Good Fella to get the blood flowing and legs loosened up.
DiCCS
Warm-up
Start with a mosey around the HS to the backside with 25 SSH. The kept moving to the side of the MS for 15 MTC, 15 Plank Jacks, and the newly named Easy Button exercise also known as calf stretch. Then we head to the back of the MS to the picnic tables.
The Thang
Round 1
10 step ups or box jumps
10 Derkins
10 Dips
10 In and outs
Run lap around track with 5 burpees ½ way
Round 2
15 of each exercise
Run
Round 3
20 of each exercise
Round 4
25 of each exercise
If you’re the first ones done, you get to start over with Round 1. A few people got to complete a 5th round.
We moseyed over to the HS for some laps with Lunge Walk and Soldier Walks at each end. Intention was to do 4 rounds. Based on time we cut it down to 2 laps so we could finish with the punisher.
Moved over to the student lot for the line of trees. Alternate 5 hand release merkins and 10 squats at each tree.
Moleskin
I didn’t realize there were so many timekeepers. This is not my first rodeo fellas and I know how to keep time on the watch I wear. Now if it were Hooch Qing I would understand. All jokes aside good work fellas.
Announcements
100 PAX Challenge is up to $7500ish. Looking for corporate match programs and there is a match for the next ten $100 pledges.
F3 Waxhaw Spartan Race
June 27th 7:00am
5k with 20 workout stations
Please let us know if you can make it on GM playhouse and news channels calendar invite