Garage Band Audition
3 PAX rocked out at a new workout called Garage Band on a beautiful Monday morning. What is Garage Band? Will SOB’s attend a Monday workout? Are there horse socks? Is anybody listening to me?
Garage Band is a new Monday virtual bootcamp born out of the current insanity. Historically, SOB has struggled to sustain a Monday bootcamp (aside from The Big House up in Pineville). No one really knows why. Maybe we all just have a case of the Mondays. Every Monday. Maybe no one wants to compete with Blakovery (note, correct spelling of Blakovery). Maybe Monday’s are cursed? Rumor has it a few PAX have tried a Monday bootcamp in the past and all have suffered ill consequences. In 2015, Market Timer and Bucky tried to launch one. At the time they had flowing locks of hair down to their shoulders. By the time the workout was over… not so much. In 2017 it was Transporter and Paper Jam’s turn. Prior to that they had never pooped mid-workout. You all know how that story ends. In 2018 Escobar gave it a shot. He was just coming off his 10th consecutive marathon. As far as anyone knows he has not run since. #SOBMondayCurse
A few PAX have noted that they would appreciate a later start time option due to the lack of a commute or whatever the case may be, so we went with 0630 for this one. Since everyone is out of their normal routines now is a great time to throw some new stuff at the wall and see what sticks. It was much easier to get a 5k pre-run in with this start time. Aside from the day of week and start time, everything else about Garage Band is pretty standard.
vCOP
- SSH x 20 IC
- IW x 20 IC
- LSS x 20 IC
- Run 1 minute out w/ some karaoke, 1 min back w/ some butt kickers and high knees
vDora 1-2-3
- Partner up
- Partner 1 runs 30 seconds out, 30 seconds back while partner 2 does merkins. Flapjack. Keep going until 100 cumulative merkins.
- Partner 1 runs 30 seconds out, 30 seconds back while partner 2 does squats. Flapjack. Keep going until 200 cumulative squats.
- Partner 1 runs 30 seconds out, 30 seconds back while partner 2 does LBC’s. Flapjack. Keep going until 100 cumulative LBC’s
vPyramid
- Pax 1 calls an exercise
- 2 minute run
- Pax 1 calls his exercise again
- Pax 2 calls an exercise
- 2 minute run
- Pax 1 calls his exercise again
- Pax 2 calls his exercise again
- Pax 3 calls an exercise
- 2 minute run
- etc etc
Here are the exercises that each PAX chose as we built the pyramid:
- Coyote – SSH x 10 IC
- Soft Pretzel – dips x 10
- Tuck – diamond merkins x 10
- Coyote – CDD x 10
- Soft Pretzel – thrusters w/ weight x 10
- Tuck – split squats x 10 each leg
- Coyote – burpees x 10
Moleskin
Thank you Softie for joining and trying something new. Oh BTW you are co-site Q of Garage Band. Coyote (YHC’s 2.0) is still enthusiastic about working out after a few weeks. YHC is cherishing this unexpected time with him in the gloom.
Lessons Learned:
- We can make partner exercises like Dora 1-2-3 work in the virtual environment
- It is known that doing exercises in cadence with the PAX is problematic due to the audio lag. The Q can count the cadence for all, and still breathe, by skipping the “1”. For example: 1, 2, 3, 1; <breathe> 2, 3, 2; <breathe> 2, 3, 3; <breathe> 2, 3, 4; etc.
Better Together
8 men and 2 of YHC’s many 2.0’s Q’d a bootcamp in the zoom and proved again that virtual bootcamps are legit.
Thang
- 2 minute run into our respective ‘hoods (1 min out / 1 min back)
- Pax 1 calls an exercise
- 2 minute run
- Pax 1 calls his exercise again
- Pax 2 calls an exercise
- 2 minute run
- Pax 1 calls his exercise again
- Pax 2 calls his exercise again
- Pax 3 calls an exercise
- 2 minute run
- etc etc
Here are the exercises that each PAX chose as we built the pyramid:
- Tuck – merkins x 10
- Wild Turkey – single leg Romanian deadlifts x 5 each leg
- Fire Hazard – burpees x 10
- Point Break – LBC’s x 10 IC
- Geraldo – CDD’s x 10
- Bucky – Sister Mary Catherine’s x 5 each leg
- Bratwurst – Heels to Heaven x 10
- Wingman – 1 minute plank
Zoomskin
Thanks to all for helping YHC Q this one. The format kept everyone engaged and provided a good mix of exercises and running (~2.5 miles total). We started w/ 9 PAX and at some point YHC’s 2.1 wandered into the garage and was conscripted into the workout. As we were running down the street she was overheard muttering to herself “But I was just looking for some tape…”.
It is clear to YHC that we need these virtual 1st F workouts/2nd F hang-outs/3rd F discussions in our daily lives as a source of light as we face the growing darkness around us. Please do everything you can to stay connected and bring others into the fold. We are better together.
Reading is Fundamental
8 men showed up to walk the talk and brave The Brave. The near freezing temps were much appreciated after several days of oppressive heat and humidity. Oppressive is a relative term, but when you sweat as much as YHC does, anything over 60 degrees is obnoxious.
Thang
Mosey to circular park / traffic circle in between the 1st two office buildings on N. Community House.
- SSH x 20 IC
- Traverse circular brick bath that runs perimeter of park using only bear crawl, crab walk or broad jump. Some pax modified w/ lunge walk.
- Backwards run around traffic circle
Mosey to traffic circle next to Wells Fargo building
- LSS x 20 IC
- Traverse border of traffic circle using same rules as previous stop
- Backwards run around traffic circle
Mosey North on Comm House, stopping at corner of Endhaven for 10 merkins IC. Continue to SpringHill Suites parking lot, stopping for 20 MC IC. Right on Johnston to McAlpine Creek Greenway parking lot, stopping for 20 flutter IC. Enter Greenway and bang a right to go under Johnston, then eventually exit left on the path that spits you out next to Pike Nurseries. 20 dolly IC in Pike parking lot. Mosey on path behind large pond just South of Pike. Find way to large traffic circle at the center of Atkins Circle apartment complex.
- LBC x 20 IC
- Traverse border of traffic circle using same rules as previous traffic circle
- Backwards run around traffic circle
3-pronged Starfish
- Run to beginning of each entrance to traffic circle and perform 10 burpees
- 20 LBC’s each time you return to circle
Cross Johnston at crosswalk and mosey all the way home on N. Comm House. In total we got in somewhere between 5.5 and 6 miles.
Moleskin
Pro tip: read backblasts. YHC had that self-righteous feeling that comes with talking a workout to new territory, only to find out after-the-fact that Frasier Q’d basically the same route once. And by once I mean three weeks ago. What are the CHANCES. Had I only read the backblast… It gets worse; Wild Turkey, YHC’s creative kindred spirit, and the only member of the PAX to post at both workouts, was surely thinking the entire time that YHC was a hack. YHC now needs to redeem himself with a future Q on new territory (an increasingly difficult task in SOB Land) with an innovative premise and questionable decision making.
Great job by all PAX. We had a tight formation and there was hardly any time spent waiting for the 6. Cobains for getting us back to launch 2 minutes late. It was a direct result of taking a wrong turn into Tagalong’s beard and spending several minutes trying to find our way out. That thing is like the wardrobe from Narnia.
TUCKOUT
The Brixham Egg
10 men laid a Brixham Egg at Stonehenge.
COP
- SSH x 20 IC
- IW x 20 IC
- LSS x 20 IC
- Merkin x 10 IC
- MC x 20 IC
- Flutter x 20 IC
Thang
Mosey to fountain in middle of Brixham Green and partner up.
- Step 1: Partners run to opposite buildings, perform 10 hip slappers and then return to fountain
- 10 hand-slap merkins
- Repeat step 1
- 10 hand-slap merkins, 10 leg throws
- Repeat step 1
- 10 hand-slap merkins, 10 leg throws, 10 partner derkins
Brixham Egg
There are six buildings situated around Brixham Green in an egg shape. Run clockwise, from building to building, stopping at each one for exercises. One full loop is 0.6 miles.
Loop 1:
- At 1st building perform 3 burpees and 6 box cutters.
- At each subsequent building add 3 burpees and 6 box cutters. Grand total is 63 burpees and and 126 box cutters.
Loop 2:
- Same as round 1, but with jumping lunges and LBC’s
Mosey to retaining wall near Tony’s Pizza.
- Set 1: 1 pull up, 2 merkins, 3 squats
- On each subsequent set, add 1 pull up, 2 merkins and 3 squats
- 5 total rounds. Grand total of 15 merkins, 30 merkins and 45 squats.
Mosey to parking lot next to Einstein’s.
- Circle up, on your 6
- 1 pax calls a mary exercise, then he bear crawls around the outside of the pax circle while everyone else performs the exercise
- Take turns until everyone has had a turn
Back to launch and plank for remaining 45 seconds until time.
Moleskin
- Kobayashi was out yet again and is getting noticeably stronger
- 9 other guys were there too and each one is special and unique
- Thank you to Wild T for the opportunity to lead, and for taking us out
Ciabatta be KIDDING Me: Holiday Jukebox Edition 4.0
12 men got blasted in the face with Christmas music while doing a tabata workout at #F3Stonehenge.
Thang
Ciabatta refers to Tabata, a form of high-intensity interval training developed a Mongolian scientist. Each exercise is performed for 8 cycles of 20 seconds of work and 10 seconds of rest; 4 minutes total for each set. Doing eight different sets this way is a full F3 Ciabatta Cycle. Add some Christmas music blasted through a guitar amp-sized blue-tooth speaker and you have the 4th annual Holiday Jukebox Edition.
Due to the rain we moseyed to the basement of the Ballantyne Village parking deck. We warmed up a little by running up the stairs to the top of the deck and then back down. When I say “we” I mean everyone but me. I stayed behind to set up Wingman’s speaker. How convenient. When everyone returned we got right down to business. Here are the 8 sets of tabata that we performed:
- Wall-o-rama: crab walls, donkey kicks, balls 2 the wall, wall sits, repeato
- Plank-o-rama: regular plank, right arm out, right arm out & left leg out, left arm out, left arm arm out and right leg out, elbow plank, left side elbow plank, right side elbow plank
- Merk-o-rama: merkins, diamond merkins, wide-armed merkins, stagger left merkins, stagger right merkins, hand release merkins, tempo merkins, merkins
- Lunge-o-rama: front lunge, back lunge, skater lunge, jumping lunges, repeato
- Mary-o-rama: 8 different mary exercises Q’d by the PAX
- Animal walk-o-rama: bear crawl, crab walk, frog leap aka broad jump, duck walk, repeato
- Jack-o-rama aka The Great Jack-off: SSH, seal jacks, smurf jacks, plank jacks, elbow plank jacks, 6-inch plank jacks, side plank jack left, side plank jack right
- Burpee-rama: 8 rounds of various kinds of burpees, Q’d by the PAX (worked around a couple refuseniks)
Moleskine
Thank you Wingman for the use of your sweet blue-tooth speaker (and convenient carrying case)!
Thanks to the PAX for putting up with this nonsense for the fourth consecutive year. I appreciate the attendance despite the rain. Merry Christmas.
Black Friday Convergence > Turkey Jam
13 PAX from Cerberus, Centurion and The Brave converged at Waverly on a blustery Black Friday morning to exorcise Thanksgiving debauchery and prove Paper Jam wrong.
Thang
Mosey across Providence Rd. to new Harris Teeter parking lot for COP:
- SSH x 20 IC
- IW x 20 IC
- LSS x 20 IC
- MC x 20 IC
- Tempo Merkins x 20 IC
- Peter Parkers x 15 IC
Mosey to Central Park and partner up. Partner 1 performs merkins on side of field while partner 2 runs to opposite side of field, performs 2 burpees and runs back. Flapjack until a cumulative 100 merkins are reached. Repeat, but with a cumulative 200 squats. Repeat, but with a cumulative 200 LBC’s
Run down field, doing a pyramid of jump squats along the way. 1 jump squat at first tree, 2 at 2nd tree, etc, up to 10 jump squats and then back down to 1.
Mosey to road that borders the park for suicides. 1 burpee at the start, then run to 1st street light and back. 2 burpees at start, then run to 2nd street light and back. Etc, up to 7 burpees / street lights.
Back to Central Park for March of the Toy Soldiers aka lunge walk approx 100 yards.
Mosey to Harris Teeter parking lot for 4 Corners / 11’s. At 1st corner perform 10 plank jacks and 1 flutter (each leg). Run to next corner for 9 plank jacks and 2 flutters (each leg). Etc, until down to 1 plank jack and up to 10 flutters.
Mosey to side of Harris Teeter. Partner 1 in people’s chair while partner 2 runs up steep hill, performs 1 jump squat and returns. Flapjack. 4 total rounds.
Return to launch for Jack Webb until time expires (got up to 7 merkins and 28 air presses).
Oatskin
- Billy Goat wore a full-on snowsuit and it was fantastic
- Thin Mint had a dude wipe stashed under his hat. The morning after Thanksgiving you can never be too careful.
- After a flurry of Slack messages on Thanksgiving, Cheese Curd figured out where and when the convergence was. If only there was a schedule online…
- Tolkien flew under the radar, a far different beast than the Tolkien of old who would have been doing karaoke and backflips as we traveled from point A to point B.
- Thin Mint almost impaled himself on a random stake on the big field. #disclaimer
- It is pretty clear that the automatic mowers (think roombas) on the big field are self-aware and don’t like us
- The 4 corners / 11’s thing made perfect sense in YHC’s head but not in the real world. Mighty Mite implemented his own interpretation and it was probably better than what was called.
- YHC pulled an audible with the people’s chair / hill climb combo. After all, you can’t just mosey past a hill like that without doing something stupid on it. There was a little friendly competition during round 4 between YHC and Doc McStuffins, with the better athlete/man reaching the wall first.
- During COT McGee made a passionate appeal for the PAX to check out WAMRAP (Wednesday AMRAP workout at Waverly). He even definitively clarified what the “W” stands for, but you had to be there.
- Overall the effort was strong by all and we stayed together nicely throughout. Great work, men.
- Fun times at Panera coffeeteria. The only thing stronger than the workout was the oatmeal that YHC enjoyed. I could feel it coursing through my veins and helping me to recover instantly. I just might scoop a helping into my back pocket before Kiawah. The highlight of the morning was when Mighty Mite pointed out that Thin Mint had egg on his face, and not the metaphorical kind.
- After Paper Jam’s #fakenews that no one would post the day after Thanksgiving, we tied his “Turkey Sham” with 13 PAX. However, if you count a Dasher sighting at coffeeteria, we actually won. Better luck next year PJ.
PreBlast: VAGABOND 2018 CSAUP Info and Shirt Order
What?
VAGABOND merges F3 Area 51’s “Southern Discomfort” and F3 Sons of Ballantyne’s “Balrog” into one epic #CSAUP (completely stupid and utterly pointless) event. PAX from all over South Charlotte and surrounding areas will run a ~13 mile loop course through the Area 51 and SOB F3 regions, stopping for six 15-minute pain stations along the way. Those looking for a modified version can start at one of the AO’s along the way (more info below). For those nursing injuries, cyclists are welcome.
When?
Saturday, November 10th. Launches @ 0630 sharp, ends by 1100.
Where?
Start/end is at Hickory Tavern on Providence Rd. in Charlotte (11504 Providence Rd.) across the street from the Waverly shopping center.
Why?
It’s free, all your friends are doing it and we have badass shirts. Plus, free beer and apps. Need I say more?
After Party / Donation:
Join us for food and drinks at Hickory Tavern immediately following the event @ 1100. 1 beer and apps provided at no cost, courtesy of Kid Rock! We only ask that you please make a donation ($5 suggested minimum) to Veteran’s Bridge Home, a non-profit that helps Charlotte-area Veterans successfully transition home after military service by identifying their education, employment and healthcare needs and connecting them to available community, state and federal resources. Link: http://veteransbridgehome.org/ (just click “Donate” in the upper right-hand corner)
What to bring:
- Shovel flags (we’ll be carrying them for the duration to show support for Veteran’s Day and F3)!
- Fuel (GU, chews, etc.) *this is important*
- Hydration will be provided at each pain station, but feel free to bring your own
- Gloves
- Blinkies, reflective vest, etc.
- Change of clothes for after party
Course
Here is the list of AO’s we’ll be stopping at for pain stations, and an estimated range of when we’ll be arriving at each one:
- Waverly: 0630
- Charlotte Latin: 0700 – 0720
- South Charlotte Middle School: 0735 – 0805
- Calvary Church: 0805 – 0845
- Stonecrest: 0845 – 0925
- Blakeney: 0920 – 1000
Shirt Pre-Order
Turkey Leg’s M designed us some killer shirts. See the design below. The prices are very reasonable: only $10 for tee, $15 for long sleeve, $12 for sleeveless. The shirts are performance fabric / moisture-wicking and athletic cut. These are shirts you’ll wear proudly to any F3 workout. Several colors are available. Place your order by midnight on Monday, November 4th to get your shirt the morning of the event. We will also place an order after the event if there is enough interest. Send funds via PayPal to joesavarese@yahoo.com
Shirt – Front Design
Shirt – Back Design
PreBlast Trailer
Premature Evacuation
23 PAX accepted the annual Ballantyne “deck run” challenge and posted at The Brave to see what it was all about.
THANG
The plan was to run to the top of 8 parking decks in Ballantyne using the deck ramps, stopping at the top of each one for 10 burpees in cadence before heading down the stairs to the next deck. With 10 burpees at the start and at the end we would have performed 100 burpees in total, ascended 33 parking deck ramps and traveled roughly 6 miles.
Everything started out great. The big group of 20 PAX managed to stay together, with Tolkien leading the way up the ramps. Burpees were getting knocked out (despite a refusenik by Frasier to call burpees in cadence for the group in deck 1). No issues crossing 521. No one ran into a pond or sand trap crossing the golf course. Made it through Room 101 (the 8-story deck) despite a security car sighting on the ground level. It was starting to look like the plan would go off without a hitch.
UNTIL…
Somewhere in the middle of the sixth parking deck we were rolled up on by Northwood security and encouraged to vacate the premises immediately. “You cannot be in this deck for liability reasons”, we were told.
“So we can’t be in THIS deck”, replied YHC, hoping to create a binding legal loophole whereby we could use all the OTHER decks at our leisure in perpetuity.
“You cannot be in ANY deck”, replied our friend, who, in the midst of this career defining moment was now drunk with power.
Quick search of empty pockets hoping that a Starbucks gift card would magically materialize. It didn’t.
“Ok then” replied YHC, deflated and annoyed.
After prematurely evacuating the deck we ran around past the remaining 2 decks, just to keep our new friend on his toes. Back to launch for one AYG around the parking lot. In total we got in 60 burpees, 25 deck ramps and 5.2 miles.
BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE
Just as the crushing disappointment of a failed weinke was sinking in as we formed our COT circle, out of the ashes of defeat sprung the heroes of our story, PAPER JAM, KIRBY AND MIGHTY MITE. As it turns out, these three mavericks had left early and got through not six, but ALL EIGHT parking decks, cleverly outwitting the security guards at every turn. A subset of our group had in fact achieved the parking deck goal! And just like that, all was right with the world. Thank you, PJ, Kirby and MM for being truly Brave. T-claps to Wingman and Fire Hazard for being the only PAX to post at YHC’s deck run all three times we have done it.
POSTSCRIPT
Bunker bought Fire Hazard a t-shirt with a giant pig face on it for his birthday and gave it to him before the workout. After COT FH modeled the shirt for the PAX and it was truly a sight to behold. If you are lucky he’ll wear it to Crane Relay so that others can bask it it’s glory.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Spots are filling up for the mission trip to Peru. See Tolkien for more info on this life-changing event.
Going Rougemont
7 men skipped the BRR so they could kick ass at the The Brave.
Thang
Mosey 1.2 miles to the Rougemont neighborhood off of Endhaven.
Start at intersection of Rougemont and Endhaven. Run down hill to Rougemont and Joliette (0.2 mi). 10 burpees, then back to the start for 10 burpees. 2 rounds total. Mary for the 6.
Mosey East on Endhaven to Orchid Hill neighborhool. Start at intersection of Orchid Hill and Red Maple. Run down hill to Red Maple and Golden leaf (0.1 mi) 10 burpees, then back to the start for 10 burpees. 3 rounds total. Mary for the 6.
Mosey to new parking deck near Endhaven and Comm House. Run up stairs to top level and back down.
Mosey back to launch for 6 minutes of mary:
- Poptart: can opener
- Wild Turkey: slow flutter
- Cul de Sac: American hammer
- Tuck: windshield wiper
- Enron: Makhtar N’Diayes (Wild T wasn’t happy about this one)
- Madame T: J-low
- Mic Check: plank and 6-inch plank for 1 minute and 15 seconds
Molelsine
This was a sweaty affair. YHC got the prize for the biggest puddles. We had a strong group out there and moved around pretty quickly. Enron led the way on the hill work but the rest of the team wasn’t far behind. All in all we covered 4.5 miles with some serious hills and got in 100 burpees and lots of core work.
Congrats Cheddar! And good luck to all the BRR teams out there.