Reuniti on Ice, That’s Nice

Reuniti on Ice, That’s Nice

Early summer, before the oppressive humidity arrives and with a cool breeze blowing in sounds like a perfect day to break out the yacht rock playlist.  The current program of bells and sandbags is winding down so we filled the water bottles with wine coolers and set sail with the smooth sounds of summer.

Warmup, then the sandbag portion which was no day at the beach, then the kettlebell section which was an AMRAP cluster of several exercises.  Now onto the important stuff…

What is yacht rock you may ask, actually I’m sure you know what yacht rock is but Flipper didn’t before today so I had to explain that it is light rock from the late seventies and early eighties.  The soundtrack of a simpler, more civilized time.  The era of yacht rock went hand in hand with the rise and subsequent fall of the wine coolers like Bartles & James, Seagram’s Golden, Reuniti, etc.  I can’t help but wonder if the current popularity of hard seltzers is this generation’s wine cooler or if they will have more staying power.  I do think that wine coolers were too close in flavor profile to hobo wines like MD 20/20 and Night Train Express so they suffered from an identity crisis.  You probably couldn’t be seen christening a new schooner in 1979 with Boone’s Farm Snow Creek Berry.   Anyway, if you’re going to summer correctly (starting with using summer as a verb of course) you need proximity to water, booze, and tunes and I’m here to help with the last two.

For your hard seltzer you’re going to want to keep it simple and straightforward.  There’s a lot of options on the market now, but stick to something with basic flavors like citrus that don’t overpower with artificial sweetness, and can be mixed with liquor for extra horsepower.  Go with one of the following:

1. High Noon – the best option on the market since it is made with vodka and not malt liquor.  Tastes the best, doesn’t need mixers but in the puritanical Carolinas is only available in liquor stores.  Unlike Florida, where you can get Nooner tallboys at Publix and 7-Eleven, as the Good Lord intended.
2. White Claw – the pioneer in the category.  Several flavor options, doesn’t overpower, good for a vodka or rum floater on top.  Just stay away from the tropical nonsense like passionfruit and guava.
3. Truly/Vizzy – Pretty much interchangeable and about a quarter notch below the Claw.
4. Topo Chico – I had higher hopes for this brand but they couldn’t just make a straight lemon, they had to monkey around and add stuff.  Citrus isn’t broken.

Be careful with the Simply Lemonade seltzers and the Bojangles’ Hard Iced Tea though, separately they are just too sweet.  Mixed together over ice with a splash of lime juice however…

Next you’re going to need a carefully curated playlist to keep things smooth.  Start with some Kenny Loggins, Hall & Oats, Toto, Pablo Cruise, Olivia Newton John, and Boz Scaggs.  Sprinkle in a dusting of Billy Ocean, Ambrosia, America, Looking Glass, Seals & Croft et al then shake and served chilled.

Find a boat or a pool, keep things smooth, and stay frosty.  Enjoy the summer.