The BRAVE … Tribute to The Muthaship

The BRAVE … Tribute to The Muthaship

Summary:

*Apologies for the delay in the backblast… YHC asked some recent Brave Q’s (Mr. Bean and Gumbo) if backblasts were written for The BRAVE anymore, and both said ‘DEFINITELY NOT!’, hence their unwritten backblasts #makessense #SMH. Co-Site-Q Mario however, was kind enough to set the record straight and tell me there actually IS a backblast written for The Brave… so here it is. Enjoy!*

12 BRAVE men read YHC’s ill-advised pre-blast and STILL decided to post at The Brave, SOB’s most challenging workout of the week, in what would end up being a tribute to The Hardest Workout in all of F3 Nation, Metro’s Muthaship, which has now been decommissioned as of 6/27/2016 (read final Muthaship backblast link below).  In the end, as many as 4 miles / 1,355 vertical feet of elevation / 25 trips up the Ballantyne Village Deck including 84 flights of stairs (1,470 steps) were covered over 1 hour at The BRAVE in a workout not soon to be forgotten, and definitely planned on being repeated in the Winter with cooler temperatures.

http://f3nation.com/2016/06/27/muthaships-final-voyage/

Workout Inspiration:

As some of you may know, Muthaship Monday is the workout where YHC has posted somewhat regularly over the past year in F3.  At 5:15am it starts with a .8 mile uphill bolt from the Captain Jack Statue outside I-277, to the 12-story parking deck on the North side of Time Warner Cable Arena in Uptown, endeared to all as ‘The Muthaship’.  For 45 minutes, PAX run up, down, and across 12 flights of stairs, ramps, and the dizzyback spiral (a 30-40% grade circular ramp) mixing in bootcamp exercises, and trying to complete as many rounds as possible, before sprinting back to the starting point at 6:08am for a 6:15am COT.  It’s a race, and there’s no waiting for the 6 at The Mutha.  Too slow? Get lapped, get taunted, and get better so it doesn’t happen again. Wanna see what top level fitness looks like? Watch Bunny, Foulball, and Frasier ascend up the dizzyback 16 or 17X in 45min (get their autograph later).  Come to The Mutha to test yourself in the ultimate proving ground, max out your heart rate, spill some merlot, fill your legs with lactic acid, and take your body and mind to the edge of breaking… hate it, love it, and then do it again next Monday.  The Muthaship is where YHC got started in F3, about a year ago, and along with SWIFT (#Bratwurstrules), is the workout YHC credits for any fitness success I’ve had in the past year.

YHC did not know that the final Muthaship workout would be Monday, but because of the profound impact that workout has had on me, YHC decided to simulate The Muthaship workout as best as possible in the 4 story Ballantyne Village Parking Deck to give some SOB’s unwilling to get out of their comfort zone drive 15 minutes to Uptown a taste of the Muthaship experience on my 1yr anniversary in F3. Here is what we did:

PRE-BLAST:

YHC has the Q for The Brave Friday, substi-Q’ing for my boi Tuck, who is unfortunately on IR… get well brother #F3HotTubs.  For the rest of you, here is the plan for The Brave on Friday. At 5:15am, we’ll turn the Ballantyne Village parking deck into a mini-Muthaship, and since that workout has a pre-blast, this one will as well… you have all day to decide whether this workout is right for you.

Partner Races… best you try to partner-up by size / speed. This will be your partner for the entire hour.

THE THANG:

1) 5:15am START- 100 total Spartan-style chest-to-ground burpees between both partners in Vine Parking lot

2) Sprint to lowest level of Ballantyne Village Parking Deck (go down the steep grassy hill)
 12 partner dumbocrats each at base of hill
 (Dumbocrat = P1 feet on P2 back, P2 plank while P1 derkin & P2 merkin at same time, flapjack)

3) Run all levels up to top of deck alternating FORWARD RUN FIRST (3 ramps) then BACKWARD RUN next (2 ramps).

4) Down the stairs on your left (farthest from Fountain), and climb up stairs 3x (210 steps = 12 flights)

5) At top of the deck, partner wheelbarrow on the straightaway for the 9 concrete pillars alternating as necessary

6) Down the stairs on your left at the end (closest to Fountain), and partner carry up stairs 3x (210 steps = 12 flights) alternating as necessary

7) Back down stairs to the bottom, and run to the TOP of the grassy hill you ran down and start steps #2 again (NO 100 burpees!). That’s 1 Lap… how many can you complete? #REPEATO

6:12am – stop wherever you are and head back to The Vine parking lot for COT, and Virtual Trophy Award presentation.

Moleskin:

Based on the Strava statistics and several PAX Slack comments, today’s Muthaship simulation @ The BRAVE was an Epic workout.  Statistically, 88 levels of the Muthaship were climbed Monday vs. 84 levels at The Brave, and a similar amount of vertical feet climbed @ 1,300 for both workouts.  Pebbles called the workout, the most challenging workout he’s had in the 500 workouts in F3 and the hardest workout of all time. Fire Hazard was so angry post-workout he likened YHC to a N. Korean Torture specialist, and Goonie and Frehley’s put this workout at the top of the list along with the hairburner, 85# bucket carries up Bagpipe Hill, and Log carry AMRAP workout. Quite possibly the hardest part of the workout was simply breathing in the two insulated stairwells (aka “hot boxes”, “sweat boxes”, “oxygen depravation chambers”), which the PAX spent a majority of the workout in, carrying each other up and down.

YHC couldn’t be happier with the crew that showed up at the Brave today.  Everyone who came was here to work, and fought through the mental and physical challenges put before them.  After all, who wants to start off a workout doing 50 burpees? How about repeatedly climb a 100 degree stairwell that smells like crap while carrying the sweatiest, smelliest F3 Brother you know? Set your calves on fire running backwards up concrete ramps? THESE 12 men at the BRAVE today are bonafide B@D@$$e$ in my book, and that’s not written in pencil… it’s chiseled in granite stone.

The Indian Land guys of Pebbles, One-Niner, and Ringer bring their hard-hat to every workout and show the PAX what teamwork is all about, and set the bar high while sharpening iron. Frasier may be the fastest guy out there, but he’s the ultimate team player pushing and sticking with other PAX when he could easily blow by everyone. Frehley’s is an inspiration to be competing against the young guys and investing in them, even at 50+yrs old. Flint is the symbol of dedication, driving from near Uptown for almost two months to put in the work in SOB land. Argonaut takes his Q’s as seriously as his workouts, and doesn’t cut corners. Goonie doesn’t duck the hard workouts, and is just a fun guy to hang out with i the gloom.  Fire Hazard is the symbol of resilience and support despite always being on the IR, whether it’s riding a bike during Balrog, or showing up and doing what he can posting with a bum candle.  Bunker has pushed YHC and others to become a better distance runner, and also writes some SICK backblasts (right Mr. Bean and Gumbo?).  And it should be duly noted how quickly our young Mario is maturing serving as site-q for multiple locations, coordinating 2^nd F’s, leading Whetstone, and doing other things that a normal 17 year olds aren’t doing.  On a day like today, no-one deserves to be trolled. Great effort men.

On Second Thought….

YHC has stated above that on a day like today, no-one deserves to be trolled, and YHC is a man of his word…. But IF I DID TROLL THE PAX, here is what it would look like… hypothetically of course

Team of Mario & JRR Tolkien (Virtual Trophy #VT)

• Virtual Trophy (#VT) of the day was awarded to the duo of Mario & JRR Tolkien who completed 3+ no corner-cutting laps of the AMRAP.  At COT, Mario imagined waving to a large crowd of fans, and being kissed on the cheek by a gorgeous blonde, like the segment winners in the Tour de France. But then reality hit hard, and Mario realized he was confusing getting a tight bro-hug by mentor Madame Toussads after dinner #muah #smooch.
• There’s nothing better than when a carefully crafted plan comes together, and for YHC today was a great day. After a half-dozen sessions practicing different variations of partner carries in F3HotTubs with co-site-Q Mario, we were prepared #practicemakesperfect #IMJUSTKIDDING

Team of Bunker & Fire Hazard

• Watching Bunker and Fire Hazard was like a reenactment of the scene from Men of Honor, the scene where Officer Billy Sunday (Robert Deniro) implores Navy Diver Carl Brasher (Cubs Gooding Jr) to take 12 steps in the new heavy diver suit, with his prosthetic ankle leg on.  YHC could hear Bunker screaming in Fire Hazard’s ear during the partner carries “Dammit Cookie, move your @$$, I want my TWELVE”… while the rest of us waited for Fire Hazard’s candle to explode… just like the movie.

Team of Pebbles & Ringer & One Niner

• YHC has always wondered how Pebbles got his F3 nickname, and had been meaning to ask him… But after seeing what appeared to be a pair of jelly-bean sized imprints on Ringer’s back from the partner carries, it made perfect sense… “Pebbles”. Hey, but as they say, “it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion in the ocean” #renamingRaisins
• At one point Ringer was seen bent over his knees mentioning he felt light headed and didn’t drink enough water. Being the leader that he is, Pebbles quickly called dibs on giving Ringer CPR in case he passed out #HIM.

Team of Frehley’s Comet & Goonie

• The stairwells felt like bakery ovens, but after Frehley’s buns started baking in there, it transformed into an un-natural gas chamber. Someone farted in the stairwell… bad, and everyone knows who did it.
• Speaking of F3 nicknames, Goonie has the perfect one… except YHC doesn’t know which Goonie from the movie he best resembles? From his Slack trash talk the past week it’s definitely “Mouth”?… after he ripped off his shirt to go Metro, definitely “Chunk”? … from his pace up the ramps definitely “Sloth”? …. Or from his propositions to have everyone touch his melons after COT it’s gotta be “Mama Fratelli”. You decide…

Team of Frasier & One-Niner

• Frasier had a nasty rash on his arm that he claimed was from performance enhancing drugs poison ivy, and therefore could not perform the partner carries. YHC understood, and told him to modify as necessary. But it seemed to me that he was actually carrying his partner #OneNiner the entire workout anyway. Hey, YHC was just glad to see that man actually bleeds like the rest of us, since he always appears all skin and bones super human.

Team of Argonaut & Flint

• These two behemoths resembled WWE Legends The Undertaker and Cain as they did the partner carry up the stairwells, or maybe it just looked like they were both dead men… as Flint laid motionless draped over Argonaut’s shoulders like a mummified corpse.

Announcements:

• Ragnar Relay Race – contact YHC if you want to run in the Ragnar Relay, still a few spots open! It will be a great 1st and 2nd F Event. If you would like to Q a workout there, be a pacer to a racer, or help volunteer with a team, let me know as well.
• F3 Dads – read what we did or what you missed and plan on coming to the next F3 Dads Event(extended through F3 Dads Camp). http://f3nation.com/2016/06/27/f3-dads-sob-edition-kids-and-dads-gone-wild/    The next F3 Dads in July 9th, so stay tuned for more details!
• Read the A51 Newsletter for everything else I missed.

SYITG… J.R.R. Tolkien