Author Archive Chastain

Shift your rock to the right

5 PAX toured the campus of the Valley of the Sun and got in a little exercise too

The Warmup

Quick jog around the middle school parking lot to the top of the bus lot.

  • Side Straddle Hops IC – 20x
  • Imperial Walkers IC – 20x
  • Potato Pickers IC – 15x
  • Big Arm Circles (front and back) OYO – 10x
  • Plank – calf stretches

The Thang

  • Mosey to the bottom of the bus lot
  • Starfish (or is it 4 corners? No one knew)
    • 10 merkins in the middle
    • 20 Carolina Dry Docks
    • 20 Flutters
    • 20 Squats
    • 20 LBCs
  • Mosey to the elementary school and grab a rock
    • 10 Curls
    • 10 Chest presses
    • 10 Tricep extensions
    • Put your rock down and run to the bus and back
    • Shift to the rock on your right*
    • Repeato
  • Take your rock to the wall of the school and chair up
  • Time for the Wonderbra (“Push’em up and push’em out)
    • While in the chair position, hold your rock to your chest, then IC, lift the rock above your head, back to your chest, straight out in front of you, and back to your chest. That’s one. Do 10 IC.
    • Everyone had so much fun we did it again. But first, shift to the rock on your right
  • 10 count from The Wall**
  • Mosey to the side lot at the elementary school
  • The Beast!
    • Suicide runs between the light poles adding one of the following exercises at each pole:
      • 6 Squats (36 total)
      • 6 Jump Squats (30 total)
      • 6 Lunges (24 total)
      • 6 Reverse Lunges (18 total)
      • 6 Side Lunges (12 total)
      • 6 Burpees (6 total)
  • 10 count from our FNG***
  • Mosey back to the Sun Valley bus lot for some Mary:
    • Freddy Mercuries IC – 30x
    • LBCs OYO – 25x
    • The Dolly IC – 25x
    • The Rosalita IC – 25x
    • American Hammers IC – 20x
    • The Box Cutter IC – 15x
  • Jail break to the front of the school
  • Chair up with 50 air presses OYO
  • 2 rounds of the Protractor


The observant reader may have noticed a few asterisks in the above. YHC will explain:

* – What the Q said: “Shift to the rock on your right”. What was heard by the PAX: Something like “Shift the rock to your right while simultaneously picking a completely different place than you were previously standing then stare at the Q like HE’s the crazy one”

** – The Wall might be a programmer IRL and does zero based counting, so the PAX got a welcomed extra second to breathe

*** – The QIC (AKA YHC) failed to specify what language for the second 10 count so the FNG did our 10 count in English, Spanish, and Japanese. At least for the first few numbers…Note to self: Be more specific with these jokers

This morning was perfect weather for F3. Starting out at 47 degrees and winding up around 51 by the wrap up. The sun was up in the Valley of the Sun and 5 brave men sweated it out and got in some good fellowship along the way.

YHC brought out the FNG Jerrod, now known as Scooter. He may not be feeling that way right now, but he crushed it and he’ll be back.

Bonhoeffer is a great leader in all 3 of the Fs. Much appreciation for his dedication to Outland

Arsenal and The Wall really pushed it today and even caught Arsenal sprinting to finish up both the rock exercises and the Beast. Overachiever…

Final note:

Looking for some guys to step up and lead a Q or two at Outland. Bonhoeffer, Smokey, and YHC have been cycling more frequently than others. I’m more than happy to co-Q with you if it’s your first time or help you build it out if you’re looking for ideas. Reach out to me, Chastain, on Facebook, Twitter, GroupMe or at Outland if you wanna sign up. Or even easier, go here:

Bad Idea™

Started off the morning with a little substi-Q action. Woody had to go down range so YHC decided to throw a few bad ideas together and subject the PAX to it. We had a little mini convergence with the Monroe troops because “allegedly” there was a 5k some others were helping out with. So with a PAX of 6 we headed into the not-so-gloomy gloom and proceeded with some Bad Ideas™.

Warm Up

  • Disclaimer: Check
  • Cell Phone: Check
  • CPR: Check
  • Safety: Check

Mosey around the sidewalk next to Wesley Chapel Rd throwing in a few SSHs, Imperial Walkers, and Goofballs (standing Mountain Climbers) along the way. Right back where we started and finish out our warm up with some plank stretching and 10 burpees OYO.

The Thang:

Mosey to the cafeteria seating and find a bench. 20 step-ups (total), 20 dips, 20 supine pull-ups on the handrail then take a lap around the parking lot. Reapeato. Then repeato. Cheers all around from the PAX to their beloved Q. Definitely a crowd favorite. </sarcasm> Finish up with a little wall action, some air presses, and some calf raises on the sidewalk then a quick mosey to the hill. Folks, the Bad Ideaswere just beginning.

Partner exercises next: Partner 1 does Merkins at the bottom while Partner 2 runs the hill and does 5 Bobby Hurleys at the top. Back down to the bottom and switch places. Once the team hits 100 Merkins then plank until all are finished. Repeato but Merkins -> LBCs and Bobby Hurleys -> Low (and slow) Squats. Up the number to 150 then plank until all are finished. Repeato! This time (against YHC’s better judgment) suggestions were solicited and round 3 became 100 lunges at the bottom with 5 Monkey Humpers at the top. Thanks to Smokey, the residents of Indian Trail were subjected treated to the following:

Smokey, Bonhoeffer, and The Wall putting on a show

Following that Bad Idea a 10 count-down was requested. Thanks (again) to Smokey and his super-fast count-UP, a 3 burpee penalty was decreed and all PAX were thoroughly remorseful and chastised.

Pushing on with a cheese weave, all PAX wound up in circle for a Bad Idea AMRAP. For those readers unfamiliar with the AMRAP, it means As Many Reps As Possible. The mumblechatter picked up pretty mightily at this point. With a fancy-schmancy app that YHC downloaded last night calling the shots, one minute each of the following exercises were called: Plankjacks, Jump Squats, and Burpees. It is entirely possible that YHC set the interval timer to 1:20 each instead of 1:00, but the PAX (mostly) pushed through. The goal was 5 rounds of AMRAPs, but an audible was clearly needed and we stopped at 2 rounds instead.

It didn’t get any better though, because the next Bad Idea called for an Outland classic with some rock lifting. Each PAX grabbed a hefty boulder and proceeded to grind out 10 curls, 10 chest presses, and 10 tricep extensions followed by a quick run to the end of the parking lot and back. This time it was YHC that was penalized, this time for poor Q form for failing to properly signal the appropriate verbiage and beginning of each of the exercises. Burpees all around. Another round of rock lifting and then a jailbreak to the starting parking lot for some cooldown Mary.


As always, a great group of men showed up, worked hard, burned a lot of calories, and fellowshipped with their brothers.

I was glad to see Shepherd and The Wall join us for the mini-convergence since several of the Monroe PAX were supporting the 5K run. It would have been easy to stay in the fartsack but all were better for their participation.

That’s all I’ve got. Apologies if you’re still reading at this point. Just for funsies:

Crossing State Lines

3/29/2014 was the first time I posted at F3 back at Ascent in Area 51.  I wanted to celebrate my 5th year anniversary by Qing in NC and SC to honor all those who have led me throughout my journey.

Saturday the 23rd I made it to Outland in Union County and did my best to lead the brothers as best I could.

We did a little warmup thang and then headed over to the tennis courts.

12 Days of  Christmas in March? Yep.

So this workout is simple and easy to Q, but not easy to participate in.  Just like the song, you repeat every number every time you go up the chain.  Here’s our 12 days:

1- Run (1 lap if you’re a clydesdale, 2 if you’re speedy)
2- Turkish getups
3- Jump squats
4- LBC’s
5- Diamond Merkins
6- Imperial Walkers
7- Rosalita’s
8- Slow flutters
9- Low slow squats
10- Lunges (each leg)
11- Merkins
12- Bupees

After Round 1 we caught our breath and went for Round 2.  Sadly we only made to about 9 again.  I know you were all disappointed.

We did a little stretching and a little Mary and we were out of there.

Thanks for the chance to lead.  Good to see some familiar faces and some I didn’t know until then.

Good coffeteria was had afterwards meeting up with Monroe.

Please lift up Rick from Mint Hill in your prayers who has cancer.

DT out.

Water, water, everywhere

“The nicest thing about the rain is that it always stops. Eventually.”


Eventually maybe, but not today. Regardless, 5 suckers brave men rolled out of the fartsack and frolicked in the puddles at Outland. YHC had prepared a workout for slightly dryer conditions, but out of spite or perhaps pure laziness wasn’t willing to modify it too much.

The Warmup:
The mumble chatter was strong from the start as we took a long mosey around the starting parking lot. Disclaimers were given and the dread set in as we realized how deep the waters were. Circle up and stretch those muscles:

  • SSH
  • Imperial Walkers
  • Po tay toh Pickers
  • Plank and stretch those arms and legs

The Thang:

  • First exercise and we’re already modifying to avoid the wet. Mosey to the covered walkway and set up two stations: Station 1 does Merkins while Station 2 does LBCs. Bear crawl from 1 to 2 and Crab Walk from 2 to 1. Repeat a few times for good measure.
  • Find a wall (benches don’t count!), chair up, 51 air presses CC
  • Indian Run with a twist: The last man in line does a single burpee before catching up to the line. He then taps the (new) last man on the shoulder before continuing to the front of the line. Continue this to mosey on to the Little Baby Track (LBT), but WAIT…it’s flooded! A quick poll indicated no one wanted to go for a swim, so continue on to the small parking lot next to the elementary school.
  • YHC posted at Watchtower this past Tuesday and decided to borrow an exercise from Damascus. The Beast:
    • Run to the first light post / perform 1st exercise / return to start
    • Run to first light post / perform 1st exercise / run to 2nd light post / perform 2nd exercise / return to start
    • Repeat until all 6 exercises/light posts have been completed
    • Exercises 1-6 – 6x Squats, 6x Jump squats, 6x Lunges, 6x Reverse Lunges, 6x Side Lunges, 6x Burpees
  • Find a wall, chair up, a few more air presses
  • Long mosey back to the buses
  • 50 (five zero) Dips, bus lap, 15 (one five) Derkins, bus lap, 50 (yes five zero) Step Ups, bus lap
  • Why not, find a wall, chair up, 67 air presses
  • Back to the starting parking lot with one final modification from the original. I’d planned on a Ladder up and down the hill but Bonhoeffer informed me he’d revolt, so we used the lot instead to do Merkins and Squats. As penance the total had to equal 8 instead of 7, so 1 Squat an 7 Burpees instead of the traditional 1 and 6.
  • Running short on time so a quick mosey to find a wall, chair up and a final few air presses
  • End with the COT


It was an honor leading these fine gentlemen through the cold and wet in the Valley formerly of the Sun. I’m sure in the not too distant future the AO will live up to it’s namesake, it’ll be hot and muggy, and we’ll be wishing it was cold and rainy again. For now, though, these guys were awesome and trudged through it with no (minimal) grumbling.


4 brave men posted at Valle del Sol to see what YHC had planned for a last minute substi-VQ. Fortunately, we all survived.

WU: Long mosey around the starting parking lot to get the juices flowing. Circle up back at the start. Random number (not divisible by 5) of SSH, Potato Pickers, Low Slow Squats, Merkins, and a wee bit o’ calf stretching.

Mosey to the bus shelter for the Thang:

  • Partner up and split the load of 50 Derkins, 100 Lunges (each leg), 150 Step ups (total), and 200 Dips. Partner 2 runs around the invisible school buses.
  • Mosey to the elementary school lot and grab a rock. 10 each of curls, chest presses, low squats to air presses, and bench presses with a flutter. In between run to the gate and back.
  • Mosey to the playground track. At this point I’m being told we’re going the wrong direction. Too bad. Onward! 10 Big Boy Situps, run a lap. 15 burpees, run a lap. Running shortish on time so…
  • Mosey back towards the start. Halt around the invisible buses for a series of Freddie Mercuries, Supermans, Bananas (Shepherd said he couldn’t go home without them), and Dying Cockroaches. Props to the group for figure out how to soldier on when YHC momentarily forgot to command the exercise start and cadence.
  • Mosey to the front and chair up on the wall while doing LIII air presses in honor of our upcoming Superbowl (Go Not-Patriots!)
  • Finish off the morning with a couple rounds of the Protractor (Somebody tell EE that 6 inches isn’t on any protractor I ever had at school)

Moleskin: The Good Hoeffer found foam dice at the $$ store, added some exercises to each side, and was kind enough to bring them out to Outland today. We took turns tossing them after each mosey to add to the workout. Extra grumbling was had by all.
YHC heard that Bonhoeffer loved running so I was sure to include 2.97 miles of it today. YHC also heard today that Bonhoeffer wanted to slash the tires of whoever said he loved running…
If anyone knows where to find a good breakfast-scented cologne, then I can tell you what to get Double E for his birthday. Something sure smelled good out there today but it wasn’t us.
Shepherd was the only one today that got the Respect, and he deserved it as I think he did the least grumbling.

A big thanks to these excellent pax for showing up and offering good words of encouragement for my virgin Q. I hope they enjoyed it as much as I did.