Hydra Tuck Rule

Hydra Tuck Rule

PAX: Foghorn, Hopper (R), Marge, Sprockets (Co-Site Q), Amber, Pop Tart, Mr. Magoo (R), Ductwork, Chico (Kotters), Queen, Puddin Pop (@trifusenik), Spackler (@trifusenik), Semi Gloss (@trifusenik), Motorboat, Gummy (Co-Site Q), Deep Dish, Jet Fuel (QIC)

17 PAX gathered in a Charlotte Mecklenburg elementary school parking lot at 0530 hrs for a heaping spoonful of misery. For now, the school is named Olde Providence Elementary, but the sewing circle mumble chatter / scuttlebutt / rumor mill says that may change in the future to Trifusenik Senior High School. Can anyone hazard a guess as to the new school mascot? The Sloths has a nice ring to it. But YHC digresses. Now, to the business at hand of writing a tagless backblast utilizing the wonky WordPress application.

Introduction: weak — Disclaimer: weaker — Mosey to bus lot: glorious

COP

• LSS x 10 IC
• IW x 10 IC
• Staggered arm merkins, x 5 IC each arm
• One legged bent over toe touch hamstring killer, x 5 IC ea. leg
• Plank Jack x 10 IC
• Peter Parker x 10 IC

Main Event #1

Mosey to behind school. Count off 1’s and 2’s, which turns out to be difficult for this Clemson-heavy group. 1’s run to oak tree benches, do 10 jump ups. 2’s run to bike rack benches, do 10 derkins. Flap Jack. Repeat 3x. Mary while we wait on the 6.

Main Event #2

Mosey to Rea, take right. Right on Summerlin. Merkins at Wessynton. Mosey to end of Wessynton. Triple Nickel up Cornwallis Camp Drive.

• Plank knee ups at Wessynton
• Heels to Heaven at top of hill
• Mary when finished

Mosey to end of Wessynton. Mary. Avoid rapidly approaching car. Mosey to launch.

Main Event #3

Partner up, which was executed flawlessly after the 1’s and 2’s debacle, thus restoring my faith in the PAX. Partners run to opposite ends of parking lot. Return to middle for alternating burpees, 5 ea. for 10 total between partners. Repeat until time. @trifusenik in FULL effect for this one.

Done.

Moleskin

Many a PAX have poked fun at YHC over the years for tucking in thy workout shirt, but today provided vindication in the form of plank knee ups. While the PAX wrestled with creeping shirts and bare midriffs, YHC calmly performed said exercises while demonstrating flawless form and maintaining his dignity. This is why Dick’s and Academy Sports pay YHC the big bucks for modeling their latest fashions. It’s hard work making a simple workout shirt look that good.

Today was heavy on running as evident by the 3.3 miles logged on a PAX’s Garmin mileage tracker doo hickey thing-a-majig. YHC possesses a Timex Indiglo Ironman digital watch with ZERO mileage tracking capabilities. Hell, YHC barely knows how to use the stopwatch on the darn thing. YHC would apologize for the lack of lifting heavy things, but the apology would be insincere. As Pop Tart queried, “are we ever going to work out today?” Ummm, no. Run baby run.

Spackler and Gummy crushed the bench-to-bench circuits, but the glory was short lived as the Trifusenik Tractor Beam sucked Spack back into its black hole of mediocrity. By the time we hit Triple Nickel, the Trifusenik reigned supreme as their numbers swelled. A chorus of “nos” was heard upon calling burpees at the end. Run to the light, Carianne. Mission Accomplished. YHC heard lots of mumble chatter today, but his laser focus compromised retention of the conversation topics. Anxiously awaiting the PAX to fill in the blanks on the After Action Report.

It is always an honor to Q the finest workout in Area 51. YHC had the theologically sound take-out.

Roll Tide (had to say it)