Page 17 Frozen Fun on the 17th

Page 17 Frozen Fun on the 17th

6 PAX refused to fartsack on a frozen spring morning at Thrive at Carolina Courts: Bernanke, Thurston, Hoffa, Glass Joe, Shepherd, Bonhoeffer

The Warmup

34 sidestraddle hops to kick things off. Took a lap around the parking lot doing 34 sidestraddle hops at each parking median (34=17 x 2).

  1. Windmill X 10
  2. Prisoner Squats X 17
  3. Reverse LBCs X 17
  4. Smurf Jacks X 17

The Thang (all workouts taken from page 17 of the Lexicon because it’s the 17th)

  1. Hill by the road > Quadraphilia: Set the timer for 3 minutes and run forward down the hill and run backwards up the hill repeato until the timer runs out.
  2. Chain link fence by the road > Pure Burn: Facing the fence, start in 3/4 squat position and pulse down to 1/2 squat position (90 degrees) and back to 3/4 squat X 34 … 2 repeatos
  3. Frozen soccer field > Quarter Pounder: Start at goal line. Run 25 yards and do 25 smurf jacks, back to goal line … 50 yards + 50 punch-up merckens … 75 yards + 75 prisoner squats … 100 yards + 100 reverse LBCs … plank till 6 is done
  4. South Road > Railroad Tracks: (modified so we’re not jumping over each other … stupid idea whoever invented Railroad Tracks) First pax drops to low plank, second pax weaves around first pax runs 5 yards and gets in low plank. Third pax weaves through both pax runs 5 yards and gets in low plank. After all pax have gone, the first pax weaves through all the pax and returns to low plank. Continue till end of road.
  5. Pylons by picnic tables > Pure Burn + people’s chair x 50 + bear crawl to circle + 15 smurf jacks + bear crawl back to pylons
  6. Return to launch.
  7. Mary > windmill + protractor
  8. El fin.


Apparently, spring means it can still be freezing cold, and apparently, that means lots of PAX enjoy breathing in their own fartsacks.

It became apparent that Page 17 of the Lexicon gives too many PAX prison flashbacks.

Glass Joe was in rare quiet form. Except when he was complaining about forgetting his long-sleeve shirt. #Irony #SomePeopleAren’tVerySmart

Shepherd confessed that he purposefully avoids Qing workouts, but he’s going to make it up by doing one a month for the rest of 2018.

El fin.


  1. Keep Glass Joe’s father(-in-law?) in prayer over his successful cancer surgery.

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