So, a couple of weeks ago, YHC turned 40. For reasons surpassing understanding, YHC Q’d Skunk Works that morning and ran a workout that was terrible. You can read about it if you want.
Fast forward to today, YHC was tasked with leading the fine men of Peak 51, and for reasons also surpassing understanding, decided to run a similar workout.
But Lois, you might ask, Skunk is a kettlebell workout. Peak is a regular boot camp, how are you going to change a KB workout to a non-KB workout and keep the same oeuvre? Also, did you just use “ouvere” in a backblast? Did you use it correctly, Mr. “I got an A in French at South Carolina”?
Answers in reverse order:
It’s 5:30, let’s mosey to the FBC Matthews parking lot. Run a figure-8 around the islands. Lumberjack already entering refusenik mode, reminding YHC that Sparta launches at 5:15.
It’s going to be a day, y’all.
COP
THANG
First-up, two round of suicides, using the middle lamp posts as the light unto our path. First one, back, second one back, back of the parking lot and back.
Okay, time for the first remix of the birthday Q. I’m now terming this routine “existential dread.”
Partner up.
Partner 1 stays at the bottom and does 40 reps of a called exercise. Partner 2 does something awful. Partner 1 runs and gets partner 2, they both run back to the bottom and flapjack.
Round 1 —
Round 2 —
Round 3 —
Enough of that, let’s mosey to the next parking lot over.
Second phase of the workout, 40-second AMRAPs.
Start at the corner right by the entrance to the FBC Matthews Family Life Center.
40 seconds, AMRAP of merkins.
Mosey over to the supine bars for, you guessed it, 40 seconds AMRAP of supine pull-ups.
Mosey to the next corner next to the church office door. 40 seconds AMRAP of jump squats.
Mosey to the last corner, 40 seconds AMRAP of LBCs.
That was fun, so, let’s do all of that again. This time, instead of LBCs on the last one, 40 seconds AMRAP of burps.
Yikes. Okay, mosey back to launch, stopping at the wall.
2 rounds of people’s chair with 50 arm presses (civilian count).
2 rounds of balls to the wall.
MARY
Time.
COT
Peau de Môle
Yes, I got an A in French at South Carolina. I got a B in Italian as well. What of it?
Anyway.
The PAX were in rare form with mumblechatter this morning, starting with Lumberjack’s accusation that I was going to turn this into a running workout. Man, no, I have to have some sort of gas left in the tank for Mountain Goat tomorrow morning.
I can’t tell if Slim Fast was confused by the first part of “existential dread” or if he wanted to try and confuse everyone else. He started trying to explain how teams advance in that Champions League Communist Kickball nonsense they play over in Europe. Like how when the teams go 0-0 during several games, it goes into how the aggregate kicks per game are taken into consideration.
I have no idea.
During the inchworm-ing in round 2, Snoopy said, quite clearly, “Man, I’d rather Bear Crawl.” Now, that was the plan all along to do that in round 3, but, even if it wasn’t, that would have been the easiest audible in the world to call.
Cocktail also accused me of telling an untruth. He said of the first round of CDDs and lunge walking that those were two of his least favorite exercises, and only burpees would have made it worse. I said to this, “well, I think we might stay relatively burpee free.”
I tell no lies here. I learned this from Smokey, who wasn’t in attendance today because he’s on the west coast, gorging on In-and-Out Burger and surfing in Malibu. No, really, he is.
Also, there was a lot of chatter during the two rounds of BTTW worthy of the @HeardAtF3 account on Twitter dot com.
In all seriousness, a great group putting in the work this morning. It’s an honor to lead, both in terms of this morning and leading this group as a Site Q. It’s true what they say, it’s the camaraderie that makes getting up at 0-dark-30 and getting after it easy(-ish).
5:15 and no Q… but Spartans are not worried about that..
We know the drill..
Run til you think you are going to pass out … then run some more. Add in a little boot camp along the way and you have a 1 hr Area 51 Sparta workout with 5+ miles of running.
No frills or thrills in today’s Back Blast..
Give the disclaimer, set the watches, turn on the head lamps and off we go to the green way.
Stop ½ mile in for COP: all at slow cadence to stretch out a bit before the workout begins
Run to 1st bridge at ¾ 5k race pace (about a half mile)
LBC to hold for the 6
10 Merkins then sprint the bridge holding at far end
10 Burpees then ¾ 10k race pace to last bridge on Greenway…about a mile and half
LBC to hold for the 6
30 WW2 sit ups
Sprint the bridge
Air squats for the 6
Time to return
10 burpees then sprint the bridge
LBCs for the 6
10 Merkins then ¾ race pace to the 1st bridge..about a mile and half
LBCs for the 6.
Leave the greenway to Country place drive.
AYG up the drive to Trade street (uphill ½ mile)
Return to picnic tables in Country Place park
20 dips run to Trade and back
20 decline merkins run to Trade and back
20 Step ups run to Trade and back
Mosey to Stumptown park
2 rounds of 30 WW2 and run the park lap
Return to AO to join Peak 51 PAX
Thank you Lois for taking us out today
No announcements mentioned in COT
Honor to lead Sparta..
SYITG!!
It’s time for the latest edition of Gumby. With both Site Qs out of town, one of them for some reason decided to lend me the key to the Scout Hut and lead the workout. I mean, I hope the guys in the Boy Scout troop are strong enough to move an empty keg or two …
So, for this stretching and recovery extravaganza, it was a small, but hearty trio of YHC, the much-respected Beaver and fellow Gamecock Cocktail.
Here’s what transpired, under the mood lighting of the Bambi Lamp and the smooooooooooooth selections from a Spotify “Yacht Rock” playlist:
Devotional — stolen (is it polite to say one “stole” a devo? asking for a friend) from Dawn Staley’s Twitter account, as she often posts the devos offered by Jack Easterby, perhaps better known for his similar work with the New England Patriots. The topic was about how we approach the seen and the unseen of life, but in the end, God sees both.
From corpse pose, knees up …
Windshield wipers
Bridge
Sit up for a couple of rounds of butterfly.
Left leg out, right leg tucked in, reach for the left leg. Flapjack.
Both legs out, reach for both ankles.
Move to table top …
Cat/cow
Bird dog (left arm out, right leg back), then flapjack
Child’s pose, shifting left/right/middle
1 1/2 sun salutations, holding in down dog on the second (hence, the “half”) …
Left leg back, holding three-legged dog, swing through into lizard.
Push up into what YHC calls “cheerleader,” lunging with hands on knees.
Then arms up into a crescent stretch.
Back down to cheerleader … back down to lizard … kick out and finish the sun salutation.
Flapjack and do all that again on the other side.
After that, a round of chair, with a move into dancer, which, well, YHC did not execute gracefully. On either side.
After that, another 1/2 sun salutation, stopping in down dog. Left leg back, holding three-legged dog, swing through into Warrior 1.
Move to Warrior 2 … then Peaceful Warrior … back to Warrior 2.
Turn and face the wall in Starfish, fold over, hands in the middle. Reach back toward your 6, then move to the left and right.
Move back up and back into Warrior 2, then Warrior 1, then back to Mountain.
Flapjack and do all that on the other side, but subbing in the Ninja pose on the left and right after the starfish.
The yacht was close to running ashore at this point, so we moved into plank and did a round of everyone’s favorite — PIGEON — on each side.
Return to corpse pose, a quick devo redux, and that, as they say, is that.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Crane Relay coming up. Details are out there. Probably some other stuff.
NAKED GUMBY GREENSKINE
A nice amount of mumblechatter amongst the small group. We laughed at some of the various songs. Cocktail’s favorite was “Working for the Weekend.”
I mostly groused about how things hurt and how random things hurt on different sides. I am plunging down the canyon of grumpy old man-dom.
Beaver applauded the relative lack of sun salutations, and, sometimes they are what I nickname them — yoga burpees — effective, yes, but too many can derail an otherwise enjoyable, productive workout.
Also, a pro tip — if you go visit Cocktail at the Gin Mill and it is especially crowded, you should order an Old Fashioned. He will give you a special recipe.
We all went on a journey together … wait, Journey? Yeah, that’s a totally different band.
Oh, hey, if the Scout Hut folks have changed the locks on Swiss Miss and Tweetsie by next Wednesday, you guys should use this backblast, which is entirely comprehensive and authentic, to illustrate that there were no shenanigans. We also have no idea why the security camera footage was replaced by a DVR’d recording of the 2013 Outback Bowl. That Jadeveon Clowney hit isn’t going to rewatch itself, y’all.
The Thang
DICCS given, let’s roll …
Warmed up with a mosey to Dreamchasers, started with SSH, apparently I forgot how to count in cadence (off to a great start), but Deadwood picked me up, thank you buddy. But I still heard a little negative mumble chatter, proceeded to lash back out with never ending merkins … whatever, lets get this started.
Overall goal was to hit 3 locations:
1) N. Providence Rd. – 13 lights – Rotating between Burpee’s and Knee Slappers (5 each) on the ½ mile out. Jailbreak on return to Dreamchasers
• Two groups – Gazelles and Clydesdales – Gazelles had to go a little farther, Clydesdales just had to beat us back to Dreamchasers. Clydesdales won! We owe you some burpees or dreamchasers, you can pick.
• Wait, whose that running straight at us??? Ahhh … Gerber, should have recognized that gait, he takes one step for every two of mine. Glad you could join us.
• What I didn’t expect … Moneyball right on my heels. Way to go dude, working hard!
2) Head to Waxhaw Elementary School – Playground
• Via “Bad Idea” hill, ran one time, AND EVERYONE GAVE ME THEIR ALL, I know by all the bent over bodies at the top of the hill. Loved it – THANKS GUYS.
• What I didn’t expect … Anyone ever notice the calves on MadDog??? (and no I didn’t look any higher – pervs)
• Partnered up on the playground for pull-ups (10 each) • Squeezed in some Mike Tysons, Figure 8 leg lifts, American Hammers, etc to keep busy
• 15 minutes left, needed to Mosey back for COT (but had other plans, time permitting)
3) Keith Jong Hill – YES, got back to COT with time to spare, we used it wisely on “Keith Jong Hill” – I don’t think anyone expected this, ha-ha! Does this make me a bad person? Blame it on Deadwood.
• Headed down the hill with 5 minutes to go. Plan was go as far as you could and circle back to meet up on time for COT.
• What I didn’t expect … Was how many guys stepped WAY UP and RALLIED to the bottom and back up on time!
• Appreciated Damascus chatter, motivating us the whole way!
Moleskin
First, I really dislike WordPress. I heard we got in 4 miles in 45 minutes, plus our exercises. Dasher said we might have set a new mileage record for a 45min Floater bootcamp??? I guess I had it confused with Pursuit. Hat’s off to all of you for really hustling out there. Especially Shake & Bake who did a monster pre-run, you’re a stud! My second Q, I appreciate you guys taking it easy on me and for the tips I picked up along the way for that AO, I hope you have me back. I learned I can’t count cadence yet and I can’t remember the names of exercises quickly … apparently I am old, but can run like hell.
Lastly, I’d like to thank all the guys that made positive comments to me. I hope to return that gesture. I can honestly tell you all that I used to be 40lbs heavier and couldn’t cut my grass without taking a break. Getting in shape is a journey. In time exercise will become habit forming. You will see positive changes which induce more positive change. I’m new to F3, but wish like hell I would have been involved sooner in my life. Keep up your F3 membership, recruit more and keep being that bright light in the world of others. Mucho Respect and Appreciation for all of you guys, my brothers!
Announcements
F3 Dad’s camp – nearly, if not already sold out. check slack.
Pray for Nails (heard he might be feeling ill)
And I think I am forgetting one (back to the being old part, mental note, let video recorder run to the end dummy)
MadDog – Thank you for taking us out!
PAX:
Bottle Cap, Lazy boy (R), Strawberry, One Star, Dancing Bear, Foley (R), Fiji, The Haw (Blake Upchurch), Rubbermaid (R), Jingles, Cobbler, Short Sale (R), Dana, Good Fella, Centerfield, Over Draft (R), My Pleasure, Transporter, Swimmers, Boitano, Grease Monkey (R), Endo, Abacus (R) , Old McDonald (R), Tuck, Hollywood, Garbage Plate, Bounce House (2.0), Pocahontas, Soft Pretzel, Johnny Utah (R), Flipper, Sprinkles, Long Haul (R), Bratwurst, Heartbreaker,
Disclaimer:
Not a professional
Cell phone, CPR, Reflective gear check
Very large group this morning, 37 strong.
Mosey to the globe to circle up. The group was big enough for us to go around the world. I actually thought about getting in the globe for warm ups but only for a split second. Didn’t want to get stuck or break it and get kicked off Marvin campus.
Warm-up
20 SSH – IC
20 Imperial Walkers – IC
15 Potato Pickers – IC
The Thang
Mosey to the neighborhood Rose Cliff (thanks Brat for correcting me). I believe this is the first time going off campus at Marvin. The first thing we did in the hood was cul-de-sac to stop sign which had a nice hill going both ways. We did 10 single count speed skaters at one end, 5 burpees at the bottom of the hill, and 10 single count jump lunges at the other end. We did down and back 5 time. Well the lead group did it 5 times, everyone else stopped when they were done. We had an FNG and some people that are not what you would say are runners. They still pushed it hard. There were few dogs we woke up this morning. Was waiting for someone to come out yelling at us.
We then moved on to the main stretch of the neighborhood to do 10 merkins and 10 CCD at each light pole to the end of the road. In total I believe there were 6 lights. On the way back it was 20 SSH and 10 LBC’s. When we got back to the top of the hill, I heard someone, probably Good Fella say we had 8 minutes. Oh crap! I was worried we wouldn’t be back on time. Never pulled a Hooch. We cut things a little short to head back. I’m glad our FNG Haw kept working hard on the way back. Next time we will need to check out the trail that connect back to the other side.
Once we got back to the parking lot, we had about 2 minutes to spare. The first group had to do 10 burpees at the top of the hill and the second group did 5 and the rest of us didn’t need to do any. Not sure that’s a bonus. I believe we made it back with 30 seconds to spare.
For those of you that want to know, we covered 3.2 miles!
MOLESKIN:
When Dana asked me to Q I was a little hesitant. I haven’t Q’ed much lately other than Clyent Dinner and I joked this morning about trying to retire from Q’ing. Sometimes I struggle with putting together a workout that is good for the entire Pax. Everyone is looking to get different things from F3 and that is ok. In the end you want people to be fulfilled in what keeps them coming back. Hope the group of 37 got what they were looking for or even a little more. I believe our group age range today was from 10yrs old to 62yrs old.
It was great seeing people I’ve never met or seen in a really long time like Strawberry and Heartbreaker. It was really impressive to see “THE Haw” work hard on his first workout and not give up. He mentioned to Good Fella he was in the Marines and had let himself go. Keep coming back it will get a little easier every week.
Impressive to see all the “R’s” come out. 10 in total. I hope that I will be able to hang like those guys. Very impressive to see. #stayyoung #stayfit
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
F3 Dads camp – Already 370 tickets sold in 4 hours, just like a Justin Bieber concert. $100 per person.
Happy Birthday to my Mom!
Free Range Egg Sale by Old McDonald $5.00 a dozen
COT – Church on the Street the first Sunday of the month. Great opportunity to serve. See Strawberry.
Dancing Bear and his daughter are collecting travel size shampoo and soap for shelters. Great thing you’re doing! Teaching a valuable lesion to your daughter.
Thank you, Good Fella for taking us out!
About a month ago site Q extraordinaire, Fuse Box, reached out asking if I wanted a second stab at Chiseled. Heck yeah I did! Only 5 pax showed my first time around, YHC included, so I was pumped to try to bring a good workout to a larger crew. I added the date to my calendar and went on my merry way. Fast forward to this Tuesday morning at Watchtower when I luckily overheard a conversation regarding who is Qing where this week…”Wedding Singer is on Q at Chiseled”…oh sh!t I almost dropped the ball there big time! Luckily, I had a Chiseled workout planned that very few PAX got the experience, so I made some slight modification based on the last go around and we ready for redemption.
Pulling in at 5:15 and I see a few people pre-running. We’re already off to a good start. Swing by to grab the gear and admire the new bin out there. This one seems a bit more sturdy…I dig it. More PAX start rolling in as I get the pain stations set-up and I’m feeling good. This group will do just fine.
DiCCs given at 5:28..paced anxiously for another 90 seconds…LETS MOSEY!
WARM UP:
Mosey around mount chiseled and back to the gear bin to crab some bricks…back to start. Circle up.
With bricks in hand:
The THANG:
Quick mosey around the lot with our bricks and over to the side of the admin house. Its time for some station work. We broke in to groups of 2 or 3 as I explained (poorly) what we were all in store for.
5 minutes at each station w/ 30 seconds to recover between each station….and go!
After the station work we had about 20 seconds to kill, so everyone got down into a plank and waited for the final buzzer to sound.
Moleskin:
I think this workout was even harder the second time around, but it seemed well received by all 13 PAX in attendance. The 5 minutes of burpees was a crowd “favorite”, for sure. As I looked around the group this morning, I was really impressed to see everyone pushing themselves and fighting through my bad ideas. This morning had a way of not seeming too terrible at the beginning, but it just kept building and you could tell everyone was feeling it.
This morning also saw the return of Wrong Turn, after being MIA for some time. It was awesome to see you back out…keep it up man!
Announcements:
YHC has a hard time summoning the desire to drive from Steele Creek to A51 sometimes. What can I say, I’m lazy. But when I saw Lorax post his need for a Q this week I jumped at the chance to Q. But not without waiting a good 15 mins to see if anyone else would take it. 😛
So with the ball of snakes swirling last night I concocted a plan that would leave, at the very least me, everyone sweaty and smoked. With 7 on the line, not including Lorax, and a short disclaimer that was BrushBack approved we launched this weeks version of ANVIL.
Mosey out by entrance 4 and circle up for COP in the lot.
Cop IC x 10 SSH, IW, Merkin, Mtn Climber and LSS
All warmed up we grabbed some lifting rocks at the baseball field.
In parking lot we got acquainted with our rocks with a set of Curls, Push Press and Tricep Ext. x 10. Fully aware of our bad rock picking decisions, we began our first Triple Nickel.
Rock Merkin x 5, run to island, Rock Squat x 5, run back to start = 1 round
After 5 sneaky hard rounds we placed, gently, our new igneous friends back in their habitat to wait for our return on another day.
Mosey to playground for three rounds of 5 Pullups, 10 knees to chest (while hanging) and 15 Merkins. Swing-sets are slippery in the morning and subsequently dangerous when grip strength deteriorates rapidly. #dangerdanger #crowdpleaser
Early finishers got a prize in the form of plank outside the playground.
Mosey to HotBox where we started with a round of peoples chair with arm raises. head around to the benches and jump into another three rounds of Jump ups x 5, Irkins x 10 and Dips x 15. The PAX rushed through this and were left with no choice but to repeat it in reverse. Jump ups x 15, Irkins x 10 and Dips x 5. Circle back around to the front of HB and PC a little more.
Mosey over to center driveway for an unsavory animal walk down the way.
Bear crawl/CDD x 5 each tree to halfway (4 trees)
Flip it over for Crab walk/Lbc x 5 each tree (remaining 4 trees)
We missed 2 trees at the end. 🙁
Mosey to north face’s little brother and finish out our Triple Nickel sammich. Monkey humper x 5, run hill, calf raises x 5, run back = 1 x 5 rounds. I love making people do Monkey Humpers cause no matter who you are, you just look stupid. HA! You’re Welcome
Mosey to get some much needed Mary in at far end of launch lot.
Heels2Heaven x 10, Flutter x 10, Dolly x 10, Backscratcher x 10 and Box Cutter x 10.
Flip it over for a 45 sec reg plank and 15 sec 6” hold to AYG to launch.
Sitting in an office chair Moleskin
Ickey Shuffle is turning it on this season. Admittedly, he claimed to only be at the front because he can sprint well and short distances are his friend. Don’t be modest my friend, you are looking svelt and I can’t wait to see you tear up BRR this year. Snuka was grinding it out like usual. This 57 yr old wunderkind is a specimen for sure. I wanna be like him when I grow up. Brushback said he found his abs on the Knees to Chest and realized they were non existent. Hammer wore his reflective vest even though I reassured him we would not leave campus. Clover and Mr Magoo continue to bring it with each week. Keep up the good work. YHC about smoked himself more than once and officially won the AYG even though Ickey and Snuka were steps ahead, they stopped short of the cars. All the way through wins the race. Or in the immortal words of Sean Connery from The Rock, “Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home [with] the prom queen.” * #lifelessons
*edited for family friendliness
Announcements
Sign up for Crane relay – https://f3southcharlotte.com/2019/04/28/crane-relay-part-deux/
Beer Run – check slack channel #beerrun 5/18/19
Unofficial F3 event that rhymes with “shmearsmile” 6/7/19
check slack channel for details
F3 Dads Camp 8/16-8/18 – https://f3southcharlotte.com/2019/04/18/7th-annual-f3-dads-camp/
TAP for Hammer’s former foster child who committed suicide. Also for Red Rocks and his continued recovery.
10 men, of only a few of which I can remember, came out to run around in circles at The Nest. It was basically 9 dudes with shirts on and one without. It was lovely.
The Thang
Mosey to Lot P for a warm up lap and some exercises that included merkins, parker peter, dry dogs, IW’s and LSS’s. Officially the longest warm up I’ve Q’d.
Plan was to take it from there off campus for a triple nickel on Grayson Heights Drive but I was already tired so we stopped and did laps around a parking lot with exercises amongst partners. Lot’s of laps – prob 4-5 per partner. 100 merkin/200 dips/300 squats. Ended that portion with some stomach. It was lovely.
Mosey to the rocks. Change up partners. Partner runs up hill to track for 10 MTJ’s. Other does 10 curls/20 triceps/30 push press. Did this 3 times. Ended with one round of burpees and jump squats. This was truly lovely.
Back to lot for lot’s of oblique.
Moleskin
Not sure why but I prefer ‘The Nest’ over ‘Hawksnest’ and I always think of the Will Ferrell scene in Old School with his wife at the therapist. Check my Twitt from earlier today. Hilarious.
Large portion of the workout we discussed Lawrence Phillips beating his girlfriend in college, Brook Berringer dying in a plane crash, getting our conceal carry permits and Gloss ‘knowing’ my body. Yep, 2nd F in it’s finest. A true picture of the invigoration of male community leadership.
Announcements
Beer Mile and Beer run – Check the slack channels
Some relay race Frasier is pushing on everyone in July. All I heard was mileage and hotel rooms – both of which I know well. Yahtzee.
Thin Mint asked if I could take his Q since he was recovering from an ankle injury. Of course, I would love to get back over to the Fast Twitch.
The jokes started yesterday when I was asked via social media if I knew where to park. Yes, I missed the last time I had the Q, ironically where we park now is where I came the first time. I must have had foresight.
Once the pax started to arrive everyone seemed to have the same joke about my sweet look. I think there was some mention of the village people. You had to be there to know.
Instructions were given and a proper disclaimer since we had the nantan in the group. The grumbling started right away. I’m not sure what was said. Pretty sure this is a running workout, or it at least use to be, so we ran. I did oblige the rule of putting hands on the ground to appease the masses.
We ran to the bottom of Providence road to the stop light by the entrance of Providence Plantation. Instructions were to run to Shallowwood entrance do five hand release merkins, run down to the bottom where we started do five hand release merkins and then to the top, following Providence road to the raintree entrance doing five hand release merkins. We did this twice.
Some confusion ensued at this point since the instruction was to go catch the six and follow them back. Like most workouts at Fast Twitch some did not listen or refused. We all got to the same point eventually.
Once we regrouped we headed across the street into Providence Heights. Just run to the end of the cul de sac and back. Catch the six. Head up Providence back to the AO to stop and do two more rounds of run to the top and then back down doing five hand release merkins on Raintree Ln. Dodge some cars along the way and have Purell take a segment crown with some goating from Tolken and boom it is all over. Came in at perfect timing, at least eleven of us did. Four decided to desent.
Thanks for the grumbling, it is part of what makes getting up in the morning so much fun. Look forward to more of it this summer.