Did it Live Up to the Hype? TLDR: No

Did it Live Up to the Hype? TLDR: No

August is the month of no duplicate Q’s, so I knew I had to make the most of my one chance to lead this month. This was also my first Impromptu Q, so I was really feeling the pressure as I started to play with my weinke plan the workout. The problem was, my creative juices were not flowing (I’m avoiding the easy weinke/juices joke here). Ask the M…”Don’t do burpees. Their lame”. Ok, but that doesn’t mean I’m making it too easy. Ask the neighbor(Einhorn)…”Make some abs?”. Ok, this is what I have to go with. Here’s how all of the intense thought played out….

Warm-up:

  • Mosey to the front of the middle school and circle up (really creative already)
  • IC:
    • SSH x 30
    • Potato Pickers x 10
    • Calf stretch
    • Mountain Climbers x 20
    • Merkins x 15
    • Plank (30 ish seconds)
  • Recover…lets go!

The Thang:

  • Mosey to the main road that goes to the other side of campus
  • At every light post alternate leg lifts x10 / American Hammers x10
  • Mosey to the lot closest to the stadium
  • Burpee Tyson Ladder in parking lot. Start w/ 1 Tyson, then run to the next island. 2 Tysons. Zig Zag until you get to 10 tysons….that sucked
  • Mosey (the long way) to the back of the High School.
  • Split up between back door and wood benches.
    • Benches by door: Step-ups x 20
    • Wooden Benches: Dips x 30
    • Run between..do each exercise 3 times
  • Mosey over to covered area by tennis courts
  • Hold wall sit while:
    • Air press x25
    • Seal Clap x25
    • Overhead Clap x25
    • Jabs x25
  • Mosey to front of middle school
  • Circle up and get into plank
    • clockwise, do merkin wave, counting as we go…until the group does 100 together
  • Mosey back to start…and done

Moleskin:

The rain stayed away, the temp was under 70 and we had a good turn out. 21 Pax joined me today and I hope no one left disappointed. We did have one scary moment, when I asked Frack to scoot down before the wall sits so I could be more central to the group…I almost lost my life. The group was pushing hard this morning with BC and Sprinkles out in the front of the group the whole time. That stamina must be exhausting…or not…I guess that’s the point?

The tyson ladder (which I admit was a ripoff from another PAX) was by far the fan favorite. And for those question my directions when running to the back of the HS…sometimes its ok to work a little harder. I’m just saying. In full transparency though…I completely forgot there was a cut through there from the very lot we were doing our ladder in. Regardless, we all got a good workout in.

As always, I had a great time leading the group. Being a part of this group continues to be an excellent addition to my life, and it’s awesome to see so many new guys joining the ranks lately. keep pushing yourselves, whatever that means for you personally, and just remember how good it feels now. When you’re dragging yourself out of bed in sub-freezing temps in February you’ll need that reminder. It’s a little harder, but it’s worth it every time. That’s all I’ve got fellas..let the weekend begin!

Announcements:

  • Help is still needed this Saturday at Waxhaw Elementary from 8-11. Posse has an online signup form.
  • Sunday Morning bible study at 5 stones. 7 -8am
  • The 1 Q challenge is on for August. If you haven’t stepped up to Q yet, do it now before you’re volun-told
  • Watchtower will be closed this coming Tuesday 8/6. Convergence at Bushwood for it’s official launch. 5:30am at Marvin Elem. Country Club attire strongly recommended.
  • Keep Einhorn and his family in your thoughts next week. They’re scheduled for baby #2’s grand arrival on Wednesday.

The Up and Up

Hops and Margo were there when I arrived, as was Messi, Margo 2.0 (13). Hops had HC’d yesterday. Shovel flag was flying, thanks to Margo. Scabby and Bout Time ran in. Disclaimer given to the 13 men present and off we go.

Thang

Mosey up the ramps of Tartarus, through the stank in the air. It got worse the higher we got. Up to level 4

COP

IW/Squat/MC/Merkin/Peter Parker all x10 IC.

Flutter x 60 IC

Mosey down Stairwell 1 to ground level.

AYG up to level 4. 5 Burpees/10 Donkey Kicks. Descend. 20 Merkin/20 Heels to Heaven. Plank-o-rama.

Repeat at Stairwell 2 and Stairwell 3.

Mosey up through campus and over to the rock pile on McMahon. Grab lifting rock.

Rock Set. All to 10 in civilian cadence. Do not drop rock.

Curl/Press/Tri-extension/Thruster/Curl/Press/Tri-Ext/Thruster/Curl/Press/Tri-extension. Drop rock.

Mosey back over to campus. Stairwell 1. Partner up.

Partner Stacks.

Partner 1 to level 4 and back down. 10 CDD’s at level 4 after round 1.

200 Squats/100 Merkins

Mosey to launch lot. Finish up with Mary.

COT

Moleskin

Been 2 weeks since my last post. Knew this one was gonna hurt, no matter what we did. Lots of stairs. Feeling it. Glad to get back out. Now off to the beach for a week. Should do wonders for my fitness.

Chelms left early a few times. Messi, at 13, wanted to run faster than the Q. Sorry buddy, didn’t have much more speed this morning. Solid work out there. Nice to have Bout Time join us. Good to meet Maurice and learn that he and Haze went to the same high school and graduated around the same time.

Guys all worked hard. It was a sweaty one. Was slightly concerned about spilling merlot until I got used to the smell. Pretty bad this morning.

Gambling on Sequels

8 participated in my annual Meathead Q

We warmed up. 10 swings, 10 merkins, 9 swings, 9 tea bags, 8 swings, 8 merkins, 7 swings, 7 tea bags – you get the drift.

The Thing

Split into 4 groups with Group 4 being the timer by walking their KB how they see fit around the parking lot while the other groups do their sh*t.

Group 1 – 20 shoulder press: 25 swings: 15 lawnmower; Burn out set of curls

Group 2 – 20 american hammer: 20 chest press: 20 crunches w KB: Burn out set of cleans

Group 3 – 10 squat press: 10 snatches each arm: 15 tricep ext: Burn out set of something

That’s all we did round and round for 45 min.

The Skinny Margarita nobody likes

“Meathead?” Really?” – This was the text I get from Horsehead on Wednesday. Yeah man, I’m a wanted man. Things. Many Things. He proceeds to not show bc of a white knuckler the Knights had against the Trash Pandas on Wed night. Pretty impressive actually. And all this time I thought he didn’t gamble.

Gotta give credit where credit is due to Orange Whip. As I said, I’m no regular at Meathead. I need running to keep my beer gut and man titties in check. So when tapped I proceeded to take a look back to 2017 where something like performed today was put on by Orange Whip. However, no doubt my music was better. Get better soon OW!

Speaking of music – talk about pressure. Will TR show up or won’t he? Eminem? Too explicit for TR. John Denver? Well he sucks. Why not go with the ole trusty 80’s rock. Done. Felt even more confident in my choices whilst putting together the playlist the other night. Playing each song out loud my oldest (11) son screams, “This music blows Dad!” Watch your mouth son.

Don’t get to see Soul Glow much anymore except when I come to Meathead. He shows up late Tripping Billies and looks like he ate, drank and was quite merry. He admitted he almost backed out and left when he thought we were doing burpees during the warm up. Dude. It’s me.

Stone Cold was Stone Cold. He dug the music.

Queue the Top Gun theme song – Schmedium brings up the sequel that’s coming out. For the record, I know I will waste my money to see it and be completely disappointed. Schmed’s evidently still has a huge crush on Kelly McGillis. Do me a favor and search “Kelly McGillis now” today. You are welcome. Let’s find you another crush Schmeds.

Was good getting to know Swift during our long walks around the parking lot today. He made sure I knew he didn’t like Taylor Swift within the 1st two minutes of chatter. I was dying to make fun of his KB until I found out he had a back issue from playing ball at Bill & Mary. He very well could have been there while I was betting on their opponents to cover each game. That was a good year.

Good to see Wild Turkey. Brought 2 bells and used the lighter one. #winning. He hates Top Gun but is a big fan of Creed 2. Don’t know Victoria or Box Cutter all that well. Let’s be honest they are probably better off.

Was a pleasure. See you boys in about 8 months.

Announcements

Pray for the continued healing of Strange Brew

A Step of Faith

17 horses for Swans Run this morning at Devils Turn, 1 slow guy went OYO. This is his story…

I started showing up to running workouts about 2 years ago. I needed to improve my cardio endurance but I hated running i.e. #notarunner (TM). But I hated 1 thing more, the idea of running OYO.

I was very comfortable with the fellowship of F3 bootcamps. All of us together, just trying to make it to the end. Unless someone like Rachel was lapping me. The fellowship provided the fuel to get me out of bed in the morning when I just wanted to fartsack.

Some of my closest friendships were developed in the gloom during bootcamps. There was some fear that going to the running workouts as the slow guy, I would end up a Sad Clown like when I was attending the Y.

But I took that step. When the slow guy kept showing up at the running workouts, the fast guys rallied around him. The fast guys sacrificed their own pace and their own Strava feed to help me. More close friendships were developed in the gloom. I was getting comfortable again.

Then the fast guys left me. At first I thought it was a bit cold. I have come to realize it was an act of kindness. They knew I would never get out of my comfort zone and face something I hate (running alone) if they didn’t leave first. How was I ever going to do something more than a 5k, if I wasn’t willing to run OYO. (Don’t even ask, I am not running the BRR)

But I fought against it. I don’t want to take that step. So I recruit other slow guys. But this morning, looking at a crowd without shirts, I knew I was OYO. To make matters worse, Enron chose a route I have never run (it is like 100 miles) and my watch isn’t fancy enough to download the route.

One by one the fast guys slowly faded into the gloom up the hill of Rea Rd. Secretly I was hoping a slow guy showed up a little late and was behind me. As the last guy past me, I had a choice. Take the easy way out by running up to Dunkin Donuts for a short route or take a step out of my comfort zone and run a longer route OYO.

If I made a right onto 51, I was not sure I could make the almost 6 mile loop that I was about to go on, I wasn’t even sure if I knew the way back once I got into Piper Glen. But sometimes we have to take a small step in a direction that takes us out of our comfort zone, to achieve better results. So I went down 51.

What I have learned over the years, is that God typically does not help me or others until they have taken some small step in His direction. This morning, it was to venture down 51.

As I was winding my way thru Raintree and back to Piper Glen, I was not sure I was going in the right direction. I was about 4 miles in and I could not see far enough down the road to figure it out.

Instead of pressing forward, I started to wander the roads of Piper Glen. Sometimes when we wander off the path that was put before us, we end up in a worse spot than if we just had the courage to take another step.

Just when I thought I would wind up climbing onto 485, here come the fast guys. One thing about F3, you are never left behind.

What I realized this morning, is sometimes, we don’t have the vision to see far enough down the road to make wise decisions. Many times, we need the help of other people in our life to show us the way or we just need to take another step in faith, to get us home.

When I showed up at Devil’s Turn this morning I had not broken the 9:50 mark since January. I thought I would stay at that pace for sometime. This morning my Strava feed told me my pace was 9:30.

I am grateful my F3 brothers are there to hold me accountable and to help me when I am unsure. I am grateful I decided to take a small step in the right direction this morning.

Up Yours Burpee Train

Ah…….yes the time honored tradition of the Thursday Backblast. Writing a backblast is painful enough for myself but writing one for these two spear chucking Spartanettes is double painful. They have only reminded me daily for the last month about this tradition at their Turd Fest they call The Floater. In between their daily stories of achieving Spartan stardom on Mt. Everest or wherever they claimed to have climbed 40,000 feet in elevation, completed every obstacle known to man, saved endangered species, swam the Nile upstream and saved babies from burning buildings they have still found time to badger me about this BB. Upon completion I have thought about hiding it somewhere in Zin’s Beer Room among the 20,000 beers he holds so near and dear or possibly hiding it somewhere on Chainsaw’s million acres so Deadwood has to fly his drone to find it. However, at the end of the day that damn Burpee Train sucked the life out of me and I just want to get it done and take a nap or two. The Weinke was constructed over a couple of beers at Dreamchasers last night. The beer got the creative juices flowing last night and the Vietnamese food truck got the bowels growling this morning. Luckily Zin was out of town and Deadwood gave me his garage code so I could use the only other thing he holds near and dear: The Bidet. Clean up on aisle Zin!

That Thang

Warm up lap around the block and back to the start/finish for some Frack approved stretching and sshx15. Mosey down Kim Jong hill for calf stretch and Merkinsx20 and 6 inch holds. Mosey back up hill and find the wall. Donkey Kicks reps 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, hold for 10 seconds on last rep and 5 Merkins in between each round.

Mosey to ………..The Burpee Train! Claud have Mercy that had to have been the longest train in the history of Mankind! I lost count around 30 burpees and lost feeling in all extremities around 35. There is just something about that amount of burpees and what is does to the body both physically and emotionally. Makes a grown husky man like myself contemplate life and the fact we are throwing ourselves on the ground repeatedly because a train is passing by. Finally it passed like a fart in the wind! Let’s Mosey.

The Burpees definitely took their toll on the Pax as we all came straggling into the basketball court. Line up for 2 traditional suicide sprints then bear crawl the length of the court and Mosey around to the front of school and grab some wall. Walk your feet up the wall then 20 shoulder taps then back on feet for 20 squats x 2. Mosey to cemetery up that nasty hill.

Partner up and go opposite directions around the loop. 5 hand slap merkins when you meet up. Complete 2 laps and let’s head back to school and grab some more wall.

10 Mike Tysons on your own then head back around school to basketball court. Bear Crawl the length back of the court and then start heading back towards downtown Turd Bowl. We stopped for some lunge walks and 5 more burpees on the way back to finish.

Moleskin

While I truly love busting balls of the vest wearing and Spartacus loving Floater AO’s, I’ll be the first to say our F3 group is much better from them constantly pushing our group. From signing up for all these races, getting guys to wear weighted vests, forcing us to drink beer with them and overall pushing us on a daily basis we are a better group because of them. But don’t tell those two knuckleheads I said that. Great push today from everyone. It was not easy and the humidity was brutal. Ice up and drink up! No more BB for Banjo for a whole month! Yipee!

Announcements

HYDRATE!

F3 Dads at Dogwood Park at 9am on Saturday. All 2.0’s welcome.

Waxhaw Elementary Cleanup this Saturday 8am-11am. M and 2.0 Friendly, Posse has put the signup on GM.

Sandbox event coming up, Damascus will get the link out soon.

September 14 Speed for Need

No to No Sox

Boys, the calendar turned to August this morning. After reading FSU’s brilliant (and since deleted) tweet earlier this week, I knew that August means football season is upon us…some time in the next 15 or 4 or 154 days or something like that. Apparently my internal clock knew that too as I woke up shortly after midnight. But I was reminded of the Alabama football facility which has a wall that reads “No Excuses.” 18 PAX including 1 FNG were counting on me to lead them in a football-esque workout this morning so I knew I had to suck it up.

After a quick disclaimer and waiver signing by our FNG, we took a quick mosey to the freshly paved bus parking lot at Olde Providence. I’ll tell you what – Sprockets and Gummy have really taken action since becoming site Q’s here. Sprockets even had his face molded into the new pavement Michael Scott-style.

The Thang 

  • Side straddle hop x10
  • low slow squat x10
  • Peter Parker x10
  • Parker Peter x10

Mosey to football field, partner up at the 50 for ALL IN

  • American Hammer x 50 per group
  • Lunges x 50 (each leg) per group
  • LBC x 50 per group
  • Imperial Walker x 50 per group
  • Nolan Ryan x 50 per group

Then we’d perform partner carries where partner 1 carried partner 2 from the 50 to end zone, flapjack back to 50, flapjack to the other end zone, and flapjack back to the 50. This was followed by one more round of ALL IN and partner carries.

Count off by 4 – corner 1 does 16 merkins, 2 does 16 LBCs, 3 does 16 Carolina dry docks, 4 does 16 squat jumps. After each corner, you’re meeting at the 50 for 10 burpees. Run Stopper led us on some planks while we waited on the 6. Mosey through the hidden trail to intersection of Foxworth and Windyrush. Inside voices were not used.

Catch me if you can – Partner 1 does 10 merkins and sprints to Partner 2 who has been running backwards. Flapjack. Do this all the way to Rea Rd and then mosey to the Wesley UMC parking lot.

At the church, we did some rock workouts with our partners 110% may or may not have been given. Partner 1 runs to corner of the parking lot and does 16 merkins, while partner 2 does rock curls. Flapjack. Next rotation – P1 runs to corner and does 16 Carolina dry docks, while P2 does overhead press. Flapjack. One more rotation of merkins/curls before a mosey to the starting point for some mary (Freddie Mercury, Heels to Heaven, planks).

Moleskin

Welcome to FNG Foghorn. A Boston native who recently moved from Chicago and is a friend of Sprockets. Queen suggested “No Sox” as a name, which Sprockets quickly nixed for some reason.

Speaking of names, Run Stopper may need a name change to Fun Stopper after a brutal blow to the midsection by the gate at the bus loop.

Queen took on Proehl in a last minute sprint at the starting point. He lost, but apparently covered the spread.

Lots of questions about the 16 references including several by Hannibal who was in a group with YHC, Lewinsky, and Deep Dish at one point. There’s several answers including a certain quarterback competing for the starting job in August camp.

Good to see site FNG Crosby this morning. Another Clemson grad added to the Area 51 PAX, which will be met with mixed emotions.

Thanks to Sprockets for the strong close out. And one last big shout out to he and Gummy for the opportunity to Q at #F3Hydra. Always an honor.

“Gold Found at Mt. Chiseled!”

There really was no gold found on the Mt. Chiseled site today (Doughboy knows what I’m taking about). But 14 men did get to witness the hieroglyphics left over from Rockwell’s beating last week as they circled Mt. Chiseled. No “Family Picture” was taken to protect the innocent.

The Warm Up – After disclaimers came the mosey around Mt. Chiseled to start our warm up. Come back and circle up for: 15 SSH, 15 Imperial Walkers, 15 Moroccan Night Club’s, 15 merkins, 15 plank jacks, 15 mountain climbers.

The Thang – Our timer was (to start) a complete circle around Mt. Chiseled and back to the church. We had to modify due to the fact that we think we almost lost Schneider out there! Multiple stations of pain included: Fire Pit – 20 step ups and 20 dips, the railing for supine’s, that big ass tire, the rope swing, regular curls and reverse curls, military press with weights, shoulder shrugs with dam heavy buckets, rows with sand bag, a kettle bell lift (watch the jewels!), MAN MAKERS, fly’s with dumbbells, slam balls and two REALLY stupid heavy (I think they were only 50 lbs) weights we carried across the parking lot!

The Moleskin – You really cannot prove that we did not find gold because we forgot to take the “Family Picture” and we really do not want to share it anyway. Great job to all you guys for all the hard work today! A special thanks has to go out to Fuse Box, I could not have done this without his help and support. And I am totally to blame for the tardiness of the back blast!

Posse posted on GroupMe about his wives school and the fact that they need volunteers to help this Saturday from 8 am to 11 am. You should see his posting on the news channel. F3 Dads – 9:00 am Dogwood Park, Gerber is on Q, 3 – 14 years old kids, boys and girls can attend. F3 is doing clean up of our adopted road in Waxhaw – Zinfandel is coordinating the event on the 24th after coffateria – Nesbit Park, Waxhaw. Thank you Doughboy for taking us out!

Burpees and Mike Tysons are like Peanut Butter and Jelly

DiCCS (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)

15 men made it out this morning 

Mosey to towards Middle School and stop near bus area to circle up

Warm-up:

  • Side Straddle Hop x 20 IC
  • Merkins x 10 IC
  • Imperial Walkers x 20 IC
  • Calf Stretch x 15 seconds, flapjack
  • Merkin into upward dog, hold for 10 second then transition to downward dog for 10 second
  • Extend left leg forward in lunge position with right leg back, hold arms above head for 10 second then twist right elbow to left knee and hold (This probably has a name but I’ll defer to our in house yoga expert Goodfella)
  • Flapjack the above

The Thang:

Mosey to the front of the Middle School

  • 1 Big Boy sit up, 4 single count American Hammers
  • Increase by 1 and 4 until we get to 10 Big Boy sit ups and 40 single count American Hammers

Mosey a few feet to the benches in entrance way of school

  • 20 Derkins, 20 Dips, 20 Step ups
  • Run a lap around the entire front parking lot (no half laps here)
  • Repeat 2 more times
  • Group elbow plank for 1 minute

Mosey towards Globe, stop halfway to regroup and circle up

  • 20 Heels to Blue Heaven IC
  • 20 LBCs IC

Mosey to Globe and stop.

  • 5 Mike Tysons
  • Run to first light pole for 5 Burpees
  • Run back to Globe for 5 Mike Tysons
  • 5 Burpees at 1st light pole, 5 Burpees at 2nd light pole
  • Run back to Globe for 5 Mike Tysons
  • 5 Burpees at 1st light pole, 5 Burpees at 2nd light pole, 5 Burpees at 3rd light pole
  • Run back to Globe for 5 Mike Tysons
  • 5 Burpees at 1st light pole, 5 Burpees at 2nd light pole, 5 Burpees at 3rd light pole, 5 burpees at 4th light pole
  • Circle back for the six and complete the final sets of Burpees, some got in an extra 5, 10, or 15 Burpees

Mosey to bottom of High School Parking Lot Hill

  • AYG to top of hill, 10 Merkins
  • Mosey to bottom of hill to COT, 10 Merkins
  • Still have 60 second left so Plank on elbows until 6:15

Done!

MOLESKIN

Dana asked me last Friday if I would Q the great Camel Dromedary today.  I’ve learned by now when asked you should say yes.  Also, I really like the Marvin Ridge campus and it has a lot to offer.


I’ve been dealing with a calf issue like 50% of the PAX seem to be dealing with right now so I wasn’t planning on doing a lot of running.  Deadwood seemed disappointed before we started on that plan – sorry.  My watch said 2.55 miles so hopefully everyone got in at least 2 miles.

Is anyone in WUC good with physics?  I wonder if there is any correlation between height and the speed of a burpee because I have never seen someone complete 60+ burpees as fast at Goodfella this morning. Way to kill it, encourage others, and circle back for the six.

I did something similar with Burpees and Mike Tysons at Clyent Dinner a few weeks ago.  I thought it was horrible because of the heat and humidity but today seemed to suck just as much.  Maybe having the Burpees and Mike Tysons and the end of the workout makes it worse than if they had been at the beginning. Or not, who knows

Pretty quiet for the most part today but everyone really pushed it, worked hard, and we stayed together for the most part.  Great job everyone

Thank you for the opportunity to lead.

Also, I saw this in another backblast recently and thought it worth repeating:

“If you know someone going through a tough time, don’t ask them if there is anything you can do. That’s a thoughtless gift card that never gets cashed in. You need to show up and serve them somehow, even if it means getting treated like a servant.”

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

  • Take group photos to send to marketing after every workout and send to directly Zinfandel
  • Bushwood CC is having their HARD launch this Tuesday, August 6th at Marvin Elementary.  Watchtower will be converging for this HARD launch so Bushwood CC at Marvin Elementary is the ONLY game in town next Tuesday
  • F3 Dads this Saturday at 9am at Dogwood Park.  Bango on Q.  Bring your 2.0s out for a great time with donuts at Dunkin afterwards.
  • Waxhaw Elementary needs YOUR help this Saturday from 8-11am.  Please sign up here to help out, especially if you can run a pressure washer: https://m.signupgenius.com/#!/showSignUp/508094bafae23a7f94-sprucing
  • Saturday, August 24th is Adopt-a-Downtown Waxhaw Clean Up sponsored by WUC F3.  8-10am and park at the church where we meet for Floater (Waxhaw United Methodist Church).
  • Goodfella is concerned with everyone staying hydrated with the heat and humidity.  Please hydrate and hydrate often.  If concerned, scared, and unsure of your current hydration status please send pictures of your urine color directly to him for analysis (multiple pictures throughout the day is not only acceptable but encouraged).

Perfect 7 Defeats 666

With the scheduled Q @HannibalF3 in the Gateway to the West, @Lorax in a canoe fishing and @BrushbackF3 sleeping soundly inside his gated community across the street, YHC took the Q for this morning’s #F3Anvil

7 of us gathered beneath the lights of Calvary. 7 is the number of perfection. Only appropriate that we took on The Beast. And won.

The Thang —

After a mosey to the front parking lot for the usual COP of IWs, MCs, Merkins, and LSSs, we took our places at the last island. There are 8 of them, which was good for 6 stops in between the two ends. We stopped at each of the inner islands for 6 reps of the called exercises: Merkins, Squats, Flutters, CDDs, Jump Squats, and Burpees. Then we ran over the #HotBox for a 10, 15, 20 of Step-Ups, Dips, and Derkins. A short mosey to the pitch facing the hill revealed a soaked field…#Omaha. We skipped the planned hill sprints and moseyed the new parking lot rock pile for another 10, 15, 20 of Curls, Tricep Presses, and Overhead Presses. Back to the launch point for some random Mary. Done.

The Skinny —

YHC pulled into the parking lot at Calvary, noticing a car strategically parked in the big lot where all spots were in view. Once he made visual of where we were, FNG Brian navigated the cone-filled lot and parked by us. Turn out his #PastorOfPain mentioned @F3Nation and he looked up a nearby workout. Thanks to Magoo’s waterboard interrogation techniques, we learned a lot about our FNG…locations of every house he’s owned, his SSN, and I think even a bank account number. The native of the Badger state, turned Chicagoan, now Charlottean is a Best Buy rep…named him #CircuitCity. @Magoo may be the CapitalOne hacker.

@Runstopper flexed all morning. The intimidation started with the tight shorts and continued with the short-armed burpee advantage. Then he chose Jump-Ups over Step-Ups and picked a rock that weighed more than him. #NapoleanComplex

@Snuka would not be outdone by Stopper and decided on Jump-Ups as well. Sprinted everywhere as usual. The man is likely the next spokesperson for Cenegenics, unless his Flutter form is one of the small print termination clauses.

The only thing last about @Brilleaux is when he shows up for the workout. Otherwise, he’s out front the whole time, for everything. And @PopTart put the work in, despite a little shoulder injury that he allegedly incurred during taste test #2ndF Q missions.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead. Great takeout by Stopper.

There is no “BALL” in team!

I pulled into Latin this morning about 5:20. Even though it was advertised Fast Twitch would converge with Swift this morning, there were 10ish cars already in the lot, meaning the thoroughbreds were surprisingly out there somewhere. I walked down to the track to see if they were running intervals or some such nonsense. They weren’t, however, the sprinklers on the football field were running. This presented a problem as I had a lot planned for that field today a la a mock NFL Mini Camp. As I wept and pouted walking back to the launch area, I tweaked my plan and greeted the 17 hearty studs who came ready to run the grid iron. I gave a quick disclaimer, thanked Hops for bringing a second football and off we ran to the track:

Warm Up:

15 SSH (amazing how many men have joined the refusnik party on that exercise)

15 IW’s

15 MC’s

The Stuff:

Mosey to the middle of the track for instructions on a Leatherhead Indian Run. We formed two lines. The first guy hands the ball to the second guy while running, the second guy passes it on behind him and so on. Last guy in line can’t run to the front until he gets the football. Also, if you fumble, your whole team does 10 merkins. Just to provide a demonstration, Geraldo decided to immediately pull an Earnest Byner and fumbled at the start. 10 merkins for that team. In hindsight, I think I may have made too much of an example of ole Geraldo. Mea culpa, brother! One lap later we stopped for BALL

So, here is my explanation of BALL! See if this makes sense! Two teams. Two guys from each team run up and down the steps of either side of the Hawk’s stadium. Whilst they run, their teammates perform one of four exercises….Burpees, American Hammers, LBCs or Lt. Dans. The timer for each exercise is the runner. The acronym is BALL to make it easier to remember. I don’t know if my instructions were too quick, if 5:40 A.M. is an awful time to be told to do anything, or if the average GPA of the two teams was equivalent to Blutarsky’s from Animal House, but somehow this $#^! got twisted. We finally figured it out on round two, so all was not lost.

One more Leatherhead Indian Run before heading to the Lacrosse Field:

We lined up at the goal line on the MAC side of the field. One man throws (although Spackler kicked…..kind of) the ball down the field. We drop for 10 of stated exercise on the goal line, run to the position where the ball landed and do 15 of the same, then run back to the baseline for 20. Puddin’ Pop threw a mediocre Trent Dilfer level pass right to the goal in front of us (don’t be sad about the Dilfer comment PP…..he has a ring after all!). We did Heals to Heaven to honor Puddin’s throw. Next was Revlon, who threw a Peyton Manning bomb which also ended up being the longest chuck. We did HR Merkins to praise Revlon’s certain HOF effort! Next came Spackler, who opted for the kick and engaged a Phil Dawson (Arizona) limp biscuit which landed about 25 yards ahead of us. It was kind of resting recovery! Flutters were the exercise de jour. Lastly, Leprechaun threw a respectable Boomer Esiason (lefty) worthy toss. We celebrated that one with CDD’s.

We did tunnel of love, with the “crawler” having to hold the football while moving through the tunnel. Lots of resistance on that one. I think half the dudes stood around for 10 seconds waiting to see if I was serious. I get it….artificial turf does burn. Semi Gloss stated “Hopper, you’ve been in F3 too long”!

We ended with 10 gassers with ten counts in between.

Mosey back to the launch site where Hops led the pax in some last minute Mary!

That’s a wrap.

Moleskin:

We covered 2.02 miles a la my Garmin. I wasn’t sure how many miles we would pick up given so many exercises, so I was glad to crest two. Not sure everyone else enjoyed this workout, but I enjoyed drafting it. Thanks for humoring me boys! I think some of us were suffering from O2 deprivation by the end as several guys were having difficulty remembering the Proper Name-F3 Name-Age mantra during Name-o-rama. Truly great crowd this morning boys and thanks for being there. Go Clemson, Gamecocks, Tar Heels, Deacons, Buckeyes, Illini, Bama, Wolfpack and any other collegiate football favorites represented this morning!

Announcements:

Prayers and thoughts go out to Strange Brew who is recovering at Novant Matthews from a viral condition.

Purple Haze…..thank you for the closing prayer!