A Wolfpack Win = A Happy Q

A Wolfpack Win = A Happy Q

I had no other title ready…so why not continue to crow about my Wolfpack beating the Tar Holes.

Heard from Posse that Coco Crisp was visiting from Raleigh so I connected with him on Twitter yesterday for the personal invite to Chiseled (suck on that Dromedary).  After seeing the Sloberin’ Wolf on his tire cover, I knew he was a good dude.  Later found out we were both Unicorns (business majors instead of Engineers from NC State).

Any who….DiCCS covered.  Warned of no warm up.   Lets go.

 

WARM UP

THE THANG

Mosey towards the rock pile.  Audible.  Few late stragglers with no blocks.  180 back towards the blocks.  Apparently we will warm up while stragglers grab blocks (Shout out to Loafer for the assist here).

25 SSH

10 Merkins

5 T Merkins

That killed enough time for everyone to locate a block.  Mosey to the rock pile.  Grab a lifting rock and do Curls while waiting on the 6.   Line rocks on one curb (with our blocks being at the other end of the parking lot).   Run to blocks for 30 chest presses.  Run back to Rocks for 10 staggered Merkins.  Repeat 3 times.  (It was around here that Posse decided to join us).  Once done, circle back for the 6 (Dang, Coco is fast) and gather on the rock side.

20 tricep extensions with Rock and 20 curb dips.  Repeat for 3 rounds.  Posse started channeling his inner Damascus here questioning counts.  This theme continued through the rest of the workout.

Rocks up and In/Outs while waiting on 6.  Mosey back to blocks and get in groups of 3.   P1: Curls.   P2: Block jumps.   P3: Runner (timer) half lap around the lot.    Repeat for 3 rounds.

30 Block presses, crawl bear (roughly 10 crawls), 10 Dry docks.  Repeat 3 times.   Several pax started getting angry about the reps here.  I clearly remember Posse and Ice 9 questioning but there was more mumble chatter that I didn’t quite pick up.

Watch Check, a few more minutes.   Groups of 3 again.  P1: Block Squat.   P2: Row.  P3: Half Lap.   We had enough time for one time through.

Quick Mosey back to COT.   Finito.

 

MOLESKIN

  • Great work today by so many.
  • Turn Buckle continues to push through and run at his pace at the workouts.   Great job.
  • Chainsaw, the double respect, putting most out there to shame.  He is leading next week and we should all be scared of what pain he has in store for us.
  • Coco was out front all day today.  Learned that he is the 3rd F Q in Raleigh.
  • Posse continues to the the stick poker at my workouts.  Since he showed up 5 minutes late I was able to poke back today.
  • I thought I was going to get a dry heave out of Ice 9 today, but he was able to get it under control.
  • Welcome Pennywise brought out by Ice 9.  There was a long reason why we went with Pennywise….but I forgot it.   Something about his writings and travels.   He is a Lawsonite (like we need any more of those guys).
  • Banjo arrives to a site he use to Site Q asking if we needed gear and if so where was it.   Really???   Has it been that long?
  • I had the Christmas playlist going starting with one of my favorites – Clarence Carter singing Back Door Santa.   If you’ve never head it, I highly recommend a quick listen as its only a 2 minute song.   (Yes, the same Clarence Cater who sings “I get the women saying Clarence Carter, Clarence Carter, Clarence Carter, ooooh shit, Clarence Carter).
  • Ex-Lax continuing the finance discussions with me after the workout.   Love the Finance channel.
  • O-69 pushing through a severe leg cramp earlier in the week out there getting steps in.
  • Last minute substi-Q while Transporter recovers from his back injury (who says you cant get injured while rucking).  Hoping he recovers quickly and comes back out to deliver a Chiseled beat down in 2021.
  • Thanks to Posse for last minute organizing a 2nd F breakfast at Stacks.   Coco, Posse, Radar, Surge, and myself were there.  It allowed us to grill ask Coco Crisp to share some experiences from Raleigh as well as pass on some unique culture from Waxhaw.   Some things he added to his list was DiCCS (once we got the spelling right for him), 6th man, and our use of FOMO (backblasts, family photo’s, and Groupme meme’s/call outs.  Being the 3rd F Q for Raleigh was interesting hearing all they have been doing and are doing.  For those that don’t know, Raleigh organized trips down to the coast to help with Hurricane Florence clean up for over a year after it hit (that’s right over a year).   They truly led during this time when leadership and help was needed.   They’ve also held several fundraisers, most recently an over night half marathon through Oakwood cemetery (creepy).  I must have heard the number wrong because I sear I think I heard him say they raised over $70,000 dollars.  They’ve also combined the Q source and a third F alternating weekly between the two (It would be like if we combined Open Door and Q Source).

 

ANNOUNCEMENTS

  • 3rd Waxhaw Blood Drive.   January 30th at Five Stones Church.   Sign up here: https://www.redcrossblood.org/give.html/drive-results?zipSponsor=f3   Scroll down to the Five Stones location.
  • Rice and Beans feeding the homeless in uptown Charlotte continues on into next year.   Get with Centerfold for details or to sign up.
  • Turn Buckle collecting gifts and Food Lion Gift cards for the Monroe family until today at 4:00.   He is going over there later this afternoon to deliver.
  • Client Diner shut down tomorrow.   Floater wear a Christmas sweater.   Rea Farms Convergence at 6:30 near Improper Pig Field.

 

Holiday Specials @ Meathead

7 assembled on a frosty asphalt for another edition of Meathead.  There was no question that at least 250 swing would be the order of the day but no one new that there was a holiday special of BOGO squats and 30% extra planks also being offered.  Thoroughly disclaimed (because YHC is not a professional), the following ensued…

 

THE THANG:

SSH, IW and 10 swings

4 rounds of:

12 swings + 10 racked squats R

12 swings + 10 cleans (5R/5L)

12 swings + 10 racked squats L

12 swings + 10 presses (5R/5L)

12 swing + 10 lunges (5R/5L)

2 rounds of 40 on / 20 off:

Plank

Hollow Body Hold

Glute Bridge

Side Twisty Thing R

Side Twisty Thing L

~30 second goblet squat hold to run out time

 

Moleskine:

  • The play list was inspired by Wild Turkey’s list – “A Very Turkey Christmas” that he premiered last week – would suggest you check it out https://music.amazon.com/user-playlists/74622397d5fe45deb0f1e09dbae62712sune?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US
  • High Tide learned a couple of new Christmas songs that he might play on his potential road trip over the holidays. Honestly, they were new to YHC too. He also really enjoyed the 30% special on planks offered today.
  • Soul Glow and Mighty Mite were both looking to talk about the victories of their Bengals and Wolfpack.  Soul Glow even wearing the shirt to make sure everyone remembered
  • Frehley’s said he needed some testosterone after consistent exposure to Hallmark Christmas movies which the FDA has flagged as a potential risk factor for ED
  • Unplugged thinks he may be on the edge of having a bell problem – his collection is looking more and more like Voodoo’s every day

The playlist for this interested:

Run Rudolph Run – Chuck Berry

Merry Christmas – Ramones

Christmas Wrapping – The Waitresses

Frosty the Snowman – The Ronettes

What Christmas Means to Me – Stevie Wonder

Christmas in Hollis – Run-DMC

Christmastime – Smashing Pumpkins

Santa Claus Go Straight to the Ghetto – James Brown

Mistress for Christmas – AC/DC

Little Saint Nick – Beach Boys

We Wish You a Merry Christmas – Weezer

Christmas Rappin’ – Kurtis Blow

Christmas All Over Again – Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers

White Christmas – Eric Clapton

Santa Claus is Coming to Town – Jackson 5

Joy to the World – Mormon Tabernacle Choir

 

 

Another Record Setting Evening & Keeping it Stupid Simple @ The Appetizer

DISCC

Mosey around parking lot, some carioca, butt kickers and high knees.

Circle up and 12 reps of: IW, LSS, Merkin, MC.
Stretch with: can opener, elbow low, hand high, flapjack repeat

The Thang

Begins with a musical activity to the tune of Bleed it Out (Linkin Park). Hold a plank, and do 1 Merkin every time you hear “Bleed it out”, and 1 Mike Tyson with each “throw it away”. The more ambitious held a side plank in the earlier parts of the song, but quickly it became an endless alternation of Merkins and Mike Tysons. That was a quality 2 min 44 seconds appetizer.

Mosey to the main course. At the rock pile at start of the road, everyone grabs a rock. As YHC explains the fairly simple routine. Each cone has an exercise on it. Do each exercise for 10 reps (when in doubt 2 is 1). Staring at cone 1 (Thruster) use the rock to do 10 reps, then run to cone 1 (leave rock behind). Do that exercise and return to your rock.  Repeat going one cone future each time. The one variation is that if the exercise involves travelling, do that between cones (for example do High Knees to the next cone).

Cone 1: Thruster
Cone 2: High Knees
Cone 3: Merkin
Cone 4: Heels to Heaven
Cone 5: Speed Skater
Cone 6: Mike Tyson
Cone 7: Squat
Cone 8: Burpee
Cone 9: Heels to Heaven
Cone 10: Bear Crawl
Cone 11: Lunge
Cone 12: Crab Walk

When we had about 7 minutes remaining I called the PAX in for some Mary. I kicked off with box cutters and made the mistake, intentionally, because apparently I hate myself and everyone else, of asking Posey to lead the next Mary.

Posey is a funny guy because he doesn’t look particularly threatening or mean, but ask him to lead some Mary and you’ll see what sort of a sadist he really is. That, or he just wants everyone to know that under his misleadingly average physique he actually has a bionic core, which does not sense pain of have any limits. Yeah, I’ll be feeling those American Hammers for a while (thank you sir).

I continue Mary calling mostly on 2.0s (survival instinct no doubt), to give them a chance at the spotlight, which they all handled with ease. Rock: Fredie Mercury, Watson: dead bug (clearly Posey influenced, he gave us at least 5 more reps than I expected), Johnny5: big boys, Double-Dribble: arm raises, and Dwight (not a 2.0) called Merkins because he didn’t get enough already (not that I’m complaining, who doesn’t want more Merkins).

Moleskin

Great to pull some FNGs in and set a record in attendance, good job to Johnny5 who EH’d his schoolmate and Carb Load bringing in his 2.0 daughter (I just hope we didn’t scare her away)

I had a much more elaborate workout in mind, but first thing in the AM my work took a break from the holiday and went 100% shitstorm on a burning platform. In the end I was lucky to get away at all, never mind compose an elaborate workout.  So, I dip into the toolbox for my cones of death, and recycle the best of Saturday’s daVinci workout which was a slightly more complicated, but basically the same, 12 days of Christmas suicide.  Just with different exercises and rep counts and I lacked Point-Break’s thoughtfully complied playlist of high-paced Christmas music (an impressive collection of music you forgot existed, much like how PTSD helps block out painful memories of the past).

Back to the point, this was another example of how a boring workout can really kick your ass. No precious seconds to catch your breath while you calculate the next rep count, just constant movement, slowed only by your physical limits. I don’t think anyone made it past the Burpees (cone 8) and most of us barely made it to Squats (cone 7). Starting every round with 10 thrusters was brilliant if I must say, they’re one of my favorites to love/hate.

FWIW, yesterday was the darkest day of the year. Today is the turning point toward longer days which will continue increasing for the next 6 months, then, when the daylight begins decreasing, it will happen so slowly we’ll be overheated and looking forward to cooler evenings long before we have them.

Coincidentally, we’re at a similar time with this Covid BS. Spring time (normal life) is aways off, but there is light at the end of this tunnel and everyone knows it is coming. Just like the warmer days, it will take much longer than we’d prefer, but we will make it and this dark time will quickly be a distant memory, rarely remembered.

Announcements

CSAUP Feb 6th (Superbowl weekend) touring Waxhaw AOs. For those of you not ready to do the full half-marathon starting in downtown Waxhaw, there will be entry points to come in mid-way and finish with the masses at some quality 2nd F planned afterwards at the Tap House. Promises to be a special CSAUP event.

Johnny5 pointed out we just had the “Christmas Star””, which is the North Star being aligned with planets and the moon in a way that hasn’t happened for 800 years (your next chance is in 80 years so put it on your calendar if you missed this one).

Continued holiday hours, 1 (one) hour earlier start times for all weekday AM workouts. PM and Saturdays are the usual times. PAX: C3P0, Carb load, Double-Dribble, Dwight, High Hat, JohnB, Johnny5, Posey, High Hat, Rock, StrikeOut (FNG), T1000, Watson, Weblo (FNG), Wrigley (R)

Lower the Gates

It finally happened.  The gates were lowered, the drawbridge extended and Waxhaw Express took a field trip to the Crests of Briar.  Why?  Because the only time that worked for most of the pax that would attend was still 5:15am, they live in the CofB, and change of scenery is always nice.  Would anyone care?  Would anyone come?

Well, 5 pax (including 2 non-residents) craved the earlier start time and need for speed

DiCCS were given (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)

Warm-up:

  • Mosey around Brutus’s block and all the way down Laurel Hill to the house with about 100 old school plastic blow mold decorations
  • SSH x 15 IC
  • IW x 15 IC
  • Jimmy Dugans
  • Calf Stretch
  • Glidah stretch
  • LBMC x 20
  • Toy Soliders

 

The Thang:

Laurel “Hell” Segment:

  • .25 mile uphill to the entrance of CofB
  • Hard pace up the hill
  • Slow Mosey back down
  • Repeat x 5
  • Mosey down Radcliffe to the top of Wynhurst

Wynhurst Segments:

  • ½ mile from one end of Wynhurst to the other
  • Hard pace the entire length, mosey back for six to finish together
  • 30 second breather
  • Repeat x 4
  • Mosey to the top of Radcliffe

Buckeye Block Segment

  • Another ½ mile segment
  • First two sections are downhill
  • Last two sections are uphill
  • One time then slow mosey back to start

Finished!

MOLESKIN:

Awesome to see Loafer and Flanders at Waxhaw Express. First of many trips aboard I assume.  They are training for a half marathon and a good speed workout every week will surely help their training.  Their goal was 4-5 miles today and I think they both got over 6.  Great job.

Hurry and TT killed it today as usual.  My goal during these workouts is to not get dropped….. too badly.

If you are on the fence about coming out to Waxhaw Express, come on out.  You can’t get faster and can’t improve without getting uncomfortable.  If this type of workout is outside your comfort zone that it may be just what you need.  See you there!

Power Hour Pre-Party Shenanigans…

And for my 58th Q I would recycle a previous Ignition Q because I hated it then and everyone would be sure to dislike it a 2nd time. Yet again I forgot I Q but that’s ok, that’s why I type all my Qs into my phone. Should I change anything? Nah. It’s fine.

Slept like a baby. Back is a little tight this AM. Several of the Lords of the The Crest in attendance for what should be a exercise heavy beat down. Let’s get it!

DiCCS given. Let’s roll…

THE THANG

Mosey to the front of the high school. Damn it shoes are a bit wet. Circle up for….

1. 20 x SSH IC

2. 15 x Imperial Walker IC

3. 15 x Morroccan Night Club IC

4. 20 x Deep Slow Squats IC

5. Jimmy Dugan

6. Calf Stretch

7. Can Opener to Runners Pose

Mosey to the base of the large parking lot near the stadium. 1 x MTs & 4 x Bear crawls up to 5 and 20. I love the 10 and 40 but I know others despise it. Stopped after round 8 because I was beat.

Mosey to back of the high school and find some bench. 30 x dips, 15 x box jumps and a lap around the circle. Circle back for the 6 each round. Rinse and repeat 4 times.

Mosey towards stairs. Seats taken by the Flash crew so we went down towards the buses. 1 x Big boy sit-ups. 4 x LBCs. 4 x Merkins between each round. 5 rounds completed.

Mosey down to Rudy’s Poop Palace. Find some wall. 20 of each: Jabs. Air Presses. Toe Lifts. Quick Break to shake legs. Back on wall. Jabs. Air Presses. Heel Lifts. Burner.

Mosey up hill to lunch tables. Audible after Carb Load said he was leaving. Front of the middle school to close out Rounds 9 & 10 of the Tyson Bear Webb. Fun.

Mosey to lunch tables. OYO. 10 x In & Outs. Run to alcove. 10 x Donkey Kicks. Rinse and Repeat 2 times.

Run to the front of the high school for 2 more rounds of the Ab Webb. Long mosey to football fields since I was concerned with hitting the 4mi minimum. 2 rounds of Ab Webb.

Long mosey back to COT. Time to spare so we did more Ab Webb while Flash joined in at the end. And that’s time…

MOLESKIN

Great morning everyone! My went as planned and based on the low chatter it was a success! Either that or they were whispering about my terrible plan. I felt good about it regardless.

I had planned for more of those damn runners to be there but supposedly due to children and/or work they had post elsewhere. (Insert GIF of Doctor Evil saying “Right…”

Great push my all the pax today! I always enjoy leading these workouts and hope those thighs will feel itchy with soreness by tomorrow morning. You are welcome.

Thank you Goodfella for taking us out!

ANNOUNCEMENTS

My birthday Q is tomorrow! I turn 40 and I hate it. Join me.

Smuggler has a VQ tomorrow, good luck brotha!

Continued holiday hours, 1 (one) hour earlier start times for all weekday AM workouts. PM and Saturdays are the usual times.

Falalalala – Dear Santa

Christmas is always a festive time of year to celebrate the birth of Jesus and try to refine ourselves to live a life worthy of the sacrifice Jesus made for us.  Each of us will be celebrating with our family and loved ones assuming the governor doesn’t shut down the state and your family is willing to take the risk.  I take the position that God challenges us to Fear Not for our faith in him.  Fear Not that I am bringing some fun and joy to a Christmas workout for my friends to prepare as Santa and be at the ready for hauling all those gifts around the world.

The Thang

Mosey to the circle in the park – We Love December 25th

  • SSH X25
  • Calf Stretch X 25 seconds
  • Merkins X25
  • Imperial Walkers X21- Oops, my bad
  • Plank Jacks X 25
  • Runners Stretch – 25 seconds

Mosey to the entrance to the elementary school

  • Find a running rock
  • Alternate 10 squatting with gifts of joy with 1 duck and cover (Burpee) from the kids ate each mailbox down the street
  • 25 LBC’s at the end of the street.  Everyone needs Abs to move those gifts
  • On the way back, alternate 10 curls of presents and 10 pressing gifts over our head.  Sometimes gifts look like rocks
  • 25 LBCS

Run to the school activity parking lot for the North Star (6 Points)

  • 1 Burpee in the Middle
  • 25 Merkins
  • 25 Dry Docks
  • 25 Shoulder taps
  • 25 T-Claps
  • 25 Bobby Hurrle those presents down the chimney
  • 25 Monkey Humpers for the bad little boys and girls
  • Repeat Twice for all the Joy

Mosey to the school parking lot

  • 10 Big Boy Situps
  • Bear Crawl 25 yards so the kids don’t see you
  • 10 Big Boy Situps
  • Bear Crawl 25 yards so the kids don’t see you
  • 10 V-Ups

Time for 4 Corners

  • 25 Elf Jacks at each corner
  • Repeat Twice

Run back to COT

  • Merkins every time you hear Santa in the Song

Thank you for a wonderful year.  I am not on Q for the next two weeks so I will not be able to bring any additional joy till the New Year.  Stay strong, stay healthy, Love God, Love People.

Announcements

  • Cleanup in Downtown Waxhaw at 8:00 AM
  • Blood Drive coming in January
  • TB is still collecting gift cards for the family we are helping
  • Clothes almost always need folded
  • COme out to Rice and Beans to feed the homeless

Need GPS

10 Pax lost their way this morning in the chill. It was so cold that Recalc had half sleeves on.

DICCS given.

Warm up:

  1. Mose around the neighborhood back to COT.
    1. SSH
    2. Imperial walkers
    3. Moroccan nigh club
    4. Low slow squats
    5. Plank for 30 seconds (thanks shop for slow counting us down).
    6. Merkins

The Thang:

Run around in the neighborhood with exercise at every intersection. Planned a circular route but lost my way and had to re-trace our way. Thanks Recalc for leading us back to the right track.

20 speed skaters on the way up and 20 bobby hurlies on the way back. Carbload was blazing ahead this morning.

Run to the roundabout near the pond.

20 Merkins and run around the pond.

20 Big bois and run around the pond.

20 jump squats and run around the pond.

20 back lunges and run around the bigger pond.

Run to the shed. Do the 10’s. Count down donkey kicks and count up Mike Tysons (Shop did the counting again). Saw the bench and decided to do 20 dips. Mose to parking lot.

Pick a parking spot line:  1 Burpee and 10 Side to Side shuffles x 5 (This is from Fiji’s book). It was time.

Moleskin:

Greatful for all the PAX who surround me each morning and help me and each other get better. Loved leading the workout today.

Great to have FNG Tinker EH’d by Schnitzel.

Periscope was the 6th man. He started in Arsenal and now is the siteQ there.

Announcements:

Waxhaw downtown clean up this morning and it’s clean now.

The Christmas Present that Wasn’t (aka Here’s Your Coal)

The Thang

Gathered up with 5 minutes to spare. Mighty Mite showed up donning his Santa hat and a full white beard. Makes a side comment that he’s not 100% sure what that stuff is gonna look like once this is over. Midriff came decked out in his full Llama pajamas. YHC with the Santa Suite (Waist up). So far, we’re looking like the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse. Cable Guy and Big Ben round out our quintet. They didn’t have festive outfits but they brought the festive cheer anyway.

6:30, “Little hand says it’s time to rock and roll”. Quick disclaimer, start the playlist, and we’re off. Gotta make sure we have enough time to get through the weinke. Of all the workouts I’ve Q’d this one is the most up in the air. We might be done in 20 minutes, we might not complete it, we’ll see how this plays out. I do have options.

Head out of the PetsMart lot with 5 festive men and over to the big Christmas Tree near Banana Republic. Need to bask in the Christmas glow.

CoP Exercises in cadence:

Now that we’re good and warmed up, mosey across the street to the medical plaza. As we cruise past the fountain at the medical plaza we pick up Dwight and Watson. Now we’re up to 7. Huddle up in the parking lot closest to Rea and Ardrey Kell for a little…

12 Days of Christmas

I dole out the instructions and turn the playlist up to 11. These are not your mother’s Christmas tunes. Just then, C3P0 and Johnny 5 pull in to bring our group to 9.

Starting at the first tree, we build our Christmas pyramid.

  • Day 01: 1 Burpee
  • Day 02: Run to the second tree, 2 Mike Tysons. Run back to the first tree, 1 Burpee.
  • Day 03: Run to the third tree, 3 American Hammers. Run back to the second tree, 2 Mike Tysons. Run back to the (you get the idea)
  • Day 04: 4 Jump Squats
  • Day 05: 5 Merkins
  • Day 06: 6 LBCs
  • Day 07: 7 Lunges (Each Leg)
  • Day 08: 8 Wide Arm Merkins
  • Day 09: 9 WWII Sit-ups
  • Day 10: 10 Glute Bridges
  • Day 11: 11 CDDs
  • Day 12: 12 Burpees

This is where YHC shows the PAX that this is indeed his first Saturday Q (although they wouldn’t find out just yet). Checking my watch regularly so I don’t screw this up I decide to cut us short just as we’re getting to Day 11. The lead PAX sweep the course and pick up the rest of the group. Head back to the PetsMart lot for some mary to wrap this up.

Mary:

  • Rosalitas x 12 (It’s at this point Midriff recognizes the pattern)
  • Flutter x 12
  • Windshield Wipers x 8

Called time and … damn. PAX look gleeful as though Christmas has come early. Turns out YHC had his weekday Q schedule in his head this whole time. Guess what? 15 more minutes. To their delight, I snatch back the elusive present of ’15 minutes off’ and we set out for an improvised final push.

Playlist still rocking we mosey over to the lot in front of NC Velo. Going the full length of the lot from Rea to the Best Buy we start with a round of Triple Bs. Every three parking spaces rotate between:

  • Bear Crawls
  • Broad Jumps
  • Backward Lunges

Once we get down the lot we reverse course with:

  • Crawl Bears
  • Lunge Walks
  • Spider Crawl (basically crawling like spider-man up a building. As low to the ground as you can get)

Finish it up with a couple of AYGs to squeeze out the last bit of energy from the group.

Head back to the launch to finish up that Mary we started:

  • Windshield Wipers x 4 (Finish our earlier set)
  • Slow Dollies x 12

And time.

Moleskin

  • Good hustle by the entire group this morning.
  • Minor timing issues were self-inflicted and led to 8 men getting their first disappointment of Christmas. You’re welcome.

Announcements

  • Make sure to check Slack this week as some AOs have different start times through the end of the year.
  • Look for convergences and try to finish out the year strong.
  • I’ll repeat what I said to the group during CoT this morning. This week marks my 1-year anniversary with F3. I want to say thank you to all the men that have built, led, and continue to lead this group. I want to say a HUGE Thank You to Lorax and Fallout who dragged me out into the gloom 12 months ago. I didn’t know then how much this group was going to impact me in 2020. I think this came around at the exact right time and has been one of the rocks I’ve leaned on during these past several months.
  • Please take these next few weeks to enjoy time with your friends (distanced of course) and family. I know everyone has had a different journey in 2020 but I’m guessing each of us has a lot to be thankful for. Take some time to focus on all that you do have and know that the rest of the story is safely in God’s hands.
  • As you head into next year, find the opportunity to bring out an FNG or reach out to a Kotter. I recognize how important F3 has been in my journey this year and I’m positive there are plenty of men out there that needs this too.

Playlist

For anyone interest in a 1-hour, fast paced Christmas Workout Playlist see below. Some are classics, some are obscure. But they all kept us moving this morning.

  • You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch (Tyler the Creator)
  • We Wish You A Merry Christmas (Relienk K)
  • Last Christmas (Cascada)
  • Run, Run Rudolph (Lynyrd Skynyrd)
  • Christmas in Hollis (Run-DMC)
  • Christmas in Harlem (Kanye West)
  • Santa Claus is Coming to Town (Jackson 5)
  • The 12 Days of Christmas (Straight No Chaser)
  • Wizards in Winter (Trans-Siberian Orchestra)
  • I Won’t be Home for Christmas (Blink 182)
  • Jingle Bells (Techno)
  • Sleigh Bells (Trap City Remix)
  • All I Want for Christmas (Trap City Remix)
  • Up on the Housetop (Pentatonix)
  • All I Really Want for Christmas (Lil Jon, Kool-Aid Man)
  • Moonshine and Mistletoe (Sons of Daughters)
  • Jingle Bell Rock (Bobby Helms)
  • Oi to the World (No Doubt)
  • Sock it to me Santa (Bob Seger)
  • Naughty, Naught Children (Grace Potter)
  • Oh Come All Ye Faithful (Twisted Sister)
  • Christmas Vacation (Dominik Hauser)

There’s no way that you came from my loins. Soon as I get home, first thing I’m gonna do is punch yo mamma in da mouth.

Manziel, Whip, Rhapsody, Geraldo, Chubbs, Spyglass, Pine Tar, Honeymoon, Lex, Chopper, Posse, Horsehead

13 at the Kevlar for 12 Days of Christmas Music, set to “A Charlie Brown Christmas”, by the Vince Guaraldi Trio.  Well, at least the first part.

You know the deal, or at least you do now.  12 Day of Christmas – run it through and add a day each time.  Lapsody and OnYourLeft Whip did a bonus round while we finished up.

  •  1 Lap
  • 12 Merkins
  • 12 BB situps
  • 12 Jump Squat
  • 12 Plank Jack
  • 12 Heels to Heaven
  • 12 Peter Parker
  • 12 Flutter
  • 12 Sister Mary Catherine
  • 12 Dolly
  • 12 SSH
  • 12 Burpees

 

Some boys from “The Haw” (which was apparently nicknamed by Junior Samples) rolled in to get their Passports stamped.  While we ran around in a lighted parking lot, Posse donned a full safety ensemble, with a codpiece geiger counter and a suit of armor fashioned out of aluminum foil.  He didn’t like the Charlie Brown music either, but I think it was just the ill-fitting codpiece talking.  Something was mentioned about NPR radio, but ever since Garrison Keillor got cancelled for penning dirty limericks I’ve been out of touch.

After Charlie’s football was snatched away, we moved on to some “Christmas Wrapping” by the Waitresses (Geraldo request) and then some Burl Ives, Dean, Frank, and who know what else came on while the phone was unattended.  Don’t tell me I’m not a man of the people.  Next year, I’ll bring in a pouty chanteuse to sing Santa Baby for everyone while passing around a jug of Tigerball.

There was discussion at the COT as to whether the countoff should be done Clockwise, or Widdershins.  I know that Metro is seated vs. A51 standing, but I’m (surprisingly) agnostic on these things.  Chime in with your thoughts on this.

Lots of Holiday Convergences, with all sorts of unnecessary time shifting and random late-day happenings, so be sure to check all of the proper internet channels to track these things lest you end up alone in a parking lot at the time when real workouts are supposed to start.

I would interject some more Beaufort T. Justice quotes, but they are not as funny with the substituted $%*!@ symbols they require.  Jackie Gleason was a pure comedy master.  We named a guy Beaufort T. once, I think.  It was over at Joust when it used to be a real workout.  Wonder what happened there?  Not to Joust (we know what happened there), but to the guy?

 

New Waxhaw workout starting at Porter Ridge HS, which is not in Waxhaw.  Figure it out.

 

your pal,

Horsehead

A backup band slaps floors at the Murderhorn

Yesterday, I got the text. You know the one. THE text. Can you substi-Q? OK, maybe I made that a little more dramatic than it needed to be. Anyway, I was on high gravity #2 at Lore for a post-Arsenal HH with One Niner, Cobbler, and General when I received that text asking if I could take the Q because Tag-A-Long had to tag-a-out. I quickly replied, “Yes.” Then I replied, “Who is this?” Just kidding. It’s usually me texting Taco Stand because I need help with a convergence Q, or I have really hard questions about a mortgage, or I just need someone to talk with when I can’t sleep after eating too much ice cream. So, I polished off my beer and maybe another few and headed home to plan another Brave beatdown.

Pulling into The Gibson the next morning there was a lone Wild Turkey. He yelled some unnecessary profanities at YHC that I highly enjoyed. We were getting ready to run off into the sunrise holding hands, of course socially distant holding hands to please Lord Cooper, when Jazz Hands and Soft Pretzel rolled in to ruin our fun. Some required jokes about 3 guys in red shirts and one in black not getting the memo were delivered. Some better ones about looking like a lead singer with a backup band followed. Soft Pretzel showed us later that black shirts are better than red by making us eat his dust for the entirety of the workout.

YHC delivered a pretty solid disclaimer (definitely getting better at those) and we skipped the stretching YHC had planned because it was cold, and the wind was brisk.

WARMUP

A run to the entrance of launch – approximately .04 miles

THE THING

  1. Ladder down Bobby Hurleys at each intersection from launch down BC to Elm to the top of the Murderhorn.
  2. Run down the Murderhorn, 10 burpees OYO at the bottom.
  3. Start jogging up the Murderhorn, slowly accelerating until you’re at a full sprint at the top, 25 LBCs OYO at the top.
  4. Continue on Elmstone in to Stonecrest, but only to the other AO’s parking by the theater.
  5. 7’s on the parking lot’s berm – merkins at the bottom, squats at the top.
  6. At this point we were just short of being halfway through time. YHC had planned to reverse the first half for the second half but had not anticipated having extra time. So, in reward of how fast the PAX were, YHC made the executive decision to run another set of 7’s on the same hill – this time with shoulder taps and lunges.
  7. Back to the top of the Murderhorn to redo our run down, this time with 10 jump squats OYO at the bottom.
  8. Accelerate up the Murderhorn to another 25 LBCs.
  9. Ladder down back to launch, the same way we came, but this time with plank jacks.
  10. With about 5 minutes remaining at launch, YHC stole from yesterday’s Arsenal Q and did a sorta Jack Webb of 4x bear crawls, 1x merkin, 1x shoulder tap, 4x plank jacks. Glad Softie was at both beatdowns to help me remember it. We made it to 16x and 4x.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

  • Thursday SOB sites are closed next week for Christmas Eve, converging at Rea Farms for a Taco Stand Q. Told you I leaned on him for lots of stuff! Park at the Improper Pig, 0630 start, 1 hour workout.
  • Stonehenge and Da Vinci are doing some converging over the next couple of weeks too. I don’t remember the details but will update here when I hear back from Soft Pretzel. Or you can check the schedules. Probably best to check the schedules and Slack over the next couple of weeks to make sure you’re not pulling up to empty lots.
    • UPDATE:
      • Stonehenge will converge at DaVinci 12/26 with Taco Stand on Q. Man, that dude is a Q machine.
      • Stonehenge and DaVinci will converge at Rock Zero 1/2.
      • Shameless plug: YHC on Q at DaVinci the following week – 1/9, so come get some.
  • YHC took us out.

MOLESKIN

  • Another enjoyable Q at The Brave. It’s a really fun Q to take. Maybe I’m crazy but I feel like the 4-mile requirement makes it easier to come up with a good plan.
  • There was an underappreciated moment at the start, of a dog walker not really knowing what to make of the lead singer in black and his backup band in red slapping the ground and jumping in the air at 5:30 in the morning. He moved off the sidewalk and awkwardly waited for us to pass before continuing his way. I can only imagine him going home to explain it to his M.
  • I wasn’t kidding when I said Soft Pretzel can’t be slowed down. The rest of us were able to mostly keep up with him for the first half, but he had to circle back for the us pretty far laddering back to launch. Wild Turkey was probably closest to keeping up with him, but I think that was a stretch too.
  • Wild Turkey dropping that Murderhorn is a reference from Simpsons on us blew my mind. Later Mighty Mite dropped this link on Slack – https://simpsons.fandom.com/wiki/The_Murderhorn, and I sadly only just realized that Murderhorn was a play on Matterhorn.
  • Jazz Hands texted me last night that he had broken into some Greek moonshine, or Raki, that we got our hands on last week (don’t ask, long story) and I fully expected him to not make it out but was pleasantly surprised.
  • While typing this up, I learned that Tag-A-Long was out of commission for some positive Covid testing in his household. Hate to hear that man. Hoping it passes quickly with minimal symptoms.
  • The Lord Cooper bit is just a joke, and a sub-par one at that. I know we all have different views on this pandemic, and I understand the need to slow the spread. Please everyone, be safe out there.

‘Til next time!

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