Da Vinci’s Symphony of Pain

Da Vinci’s Symphony of Pain

Date: 2024-03-23 AO: davinci Q: midriff PAX: soft_pretzel, Olaf, das_boot, teddyf3, war_eagle, Odd Job FNGs: None COUNT: 7 Yesterday, we embarked on a journey that tested our limits, forged our wills, and solidified our brotherhood. As the sun peeked over the horizon, six HIMs answered the call to conquer the gloom at Saturday’s most prestigious AO. Here’s the tale of our epic saga.
Our quest began in the shadow of the familiar, yet always daunting, concrete jungle. We circled up for a brief moment of camaraderie before diving headfirst into the abyss. A symphony of supine rows below the yoga studio stairs to awaken our slumbering muscles, followed by the explosive melody of jump squats, set the tone for what was to become an hour-long odyssey.
Mosey to the sacred grounds beside Target to retrieve concrete blocks. Partner up for squat thrusters, curls and flutter kicks with press while partner runs to third light and back. Balls to the wall in between sets – an Odd Job favorite.
Our journey then led us to the infamous hill, where sprint intervals awaited. The hill, steeped in legend and lore, tested our resolve with its unforgiving incline. Between sprints, we honored the gods with offerings of big boy situps and squats.
Make our way to Old Navy parking lot for merkins and sprints. Pick up das_boot who had been circling Blakeney trying to find the group.
In the waning moments of our epic, we stood shoulder to shoulder for the Motivator, counting down from 10 in a chorus of unity and strength.
COT: Exhausted, yet exhilarated, we ended our odyssey in the sacred circle. Amidst heavy breaths and sweat-soaked brows, we shared words of gratitude and reflections on our journey. Olaf reminded us of Holy Week, as we prepare our hearts for the life, death and resurrection of Jesus. Head to CFA for coffeeteria where we talked about legal sports gambling, parlays and whether Oakland (Michigan) has grizzly bears.
Until we meet again in the gloom,
Midriff

Older & Faster: 2024 Mile Time Trial Training is Here

Starting on Tuesday, March 26th, WXW Express and Swift will collectively embark on an 8-week training program designed to produce your fastest mile.  It’s time to set the bar for yourself for 2024.  Can you be faster than last year, even though you’re a year older?  Can you set a PR, even though you can’t make it through the night without getting up to pee?  Damn straight you can, and we will help get you there.

There will be two workouts per week for eight weeks, culminating in a mile time trial at WXW Express (Cuthbertson Middle School) on Tuesday, May 21st @ 0515.  We’re hoping that holding on a weekday will allow more pax to attend.  WXW Express and Swift will host the Tuesday workout each week.  Perform the Thursday workout wherever you’d like.  Try to rope your pals at Pursuit/Devil’s Turn/Sparta/Fast Twitch into joining you.

The plan is based on Nike Run Club’s “Find Your Fast” 8-week training program.  We did this plan last year and many PR’s were achieved, including YHC’s.  The plan is on a Google Sheet (link) so that you can save your own version and track your progress and/or make edits if you’d like.  Here are the two weekly workouts in case spreadsheets give you the willies:

  • Week 1:
    1. Tue, Mar 26: 8 x 400m @ goal mi pace w/ 60 sec recovery.  Average the 8 intervals for a proxy of your current mile fitness.
    2. Thurs, Mar 28: 2.5 mi tempo run
  • Week 2:
    1. Tue, Apr 2: 200m x 3 going from 10k pace to 5k pace to goal mi pace w/ 60 sec recovery. Repeat 5 times (15 total intervals). Note: rest 120 sec after 10th 200m
    2. Thurs, Apr 4: Fartlek Run: 1 min, 2 min, 3 min, 2 min, 1 min, 1 min @ 5k pace w/ equal recovery
  • Week 3:
    1. Tue, Apr 9: 1,000m @ 10k pace, 500m @ 5k pace, 500m @ 5k pace, 200m @ goal mi pace, 400m @ 5k pace, 200m @ goal mi pace w/ 90 sec recovery
    2. Thurs, Apr 11: 1,000m @ 10k pace, 1,000m @ 5k pace, 1,000m @ 10k pace w/ 90 sec recovery
  • Week 4:
    1. Tue, Apr 16: Hill Repeats: 1 min @ 10k pace, 1 min @ 5k pace, 1 min @ goal mi pace w/ recovery jog down hill. Repeat 3 times (9 total intervals).
    2. Thurs, Apr 18: 3 mi tempo run
  • Week 5:
    1. Tue, Apr 23: 200m @ 10k pace, 200m @ 5k pace, 200m @ goal mi pace, 200m @ goal mi pace w/ 60 sec recovery. Repeat 5 times (20 total intervals).
    2. Thurs, Apr 25: Fartlek Run: 1 min, 2 min, 3 min, 4 min, 3 min, 2 min, 1 min @ 5k pace w/ equal recovery
  • Week 6:
    1. Tue, Apr 30: 200m @ goal mi pace, 800m @ 5k pace, 200m @ goal mi pace, 600m @ 5k pace, 200m @ goal mi pace, 400m @ 5k pace, 200m @ goal mi pace. 120 sec recovery after 200m intervals and 60 sec recovery after other intervals.
    2. Thurs, May 2: 3.5 mi tempo run
  • Week 7:
    1. Tue, May 7: 8 x 400m @ goal mi pace w/ 60 sec recovery.  Average the 8 intervals for a proxy of your current mile fitness.
    2. Thurs, May 9: 1,000m @ 10k pace, 1,000m @ 10k pace, 1,000m @ 5k pace, 1,000m @ 10k pace w/ 90 sec recovery
  • Week 8:
    1. Tue, May 14: 12 x 200m @ goal mi pace w/ 60 sec recovery
    2. Thurs, May 16: 1,000m @ 10k pace, 200m @ goal mi pace, 200m @ goal mi pace w/ 120 sec recovery
  • Week 9:
    1. Tue, May 21: 1 mile time trial @ Cuthbertson Middle School @ 0515 (aka WXW Express)There will be plenty of warm-up, and multiple race heats if necessary.  There will be a post-run option for those interested.  Heck, there may even be a convergence and coffeeteria.  We’ll see.

In weeks one and seven there is a mile simulation workout (8 x 400m) that will help you identify your current mile fitness and give you a good idea of what you should be shooting for at the time trial.

Some of the prescribed workouts may be shorter than what you’re used to at our F3 running workouts.  If you are on Q for any of these workouts, feel free to modify.

It is recommended that you begin each workout with a 1 mile warmup and dynamic stretching, and end with a 1 mile cooldown.  The goal is to PR but also to get to the starting line in one piece.

Find your various training paces by inputting your goal mile pace or a recent race time here: Link.  “Tempo” pace (not shown on website) is your 5k pace + 25-30 seconds.  It is a pace that you would be able to sustain for a full hour of running and should feel “hard, but controlled”.

-TUCK

A rare ufo BB

Date: 2024-03-22 AO: _area-51 Q: MARTA PAX: Spyglass, Schottzie, Yeti, Shank, Chandelier, Paris, Situation, Fruity Pebbles, Chubbs, Broken Arrow, Chris Solomonides, Victoria, Crawdad, Mayo, Zipper, sweeney_todd, harambe Tebow intern FNGs: None COUNT: 18 WARMUP None. Old guys warm up beforehand and ice and or Epsom bath afterward.
The Thang: Pink v. Yellow. A classic battle of fates. Teams were carefully crafted for a classic clash of considerable consequence. The teams:
Pink: Yeti, Chubbs, Fruity Pebbles, Situation Mayo, Paris, Victoria Broken Arrow + 1 intern Spyglass Yellow: Shank sweeney_todd MARTA Zipper Chandelier @tebow @harambe Crawdad Chris Solomonides Schottzie
It’s surprising how even the teams are with the method of choosing them. The battle was off at the crack of 522 for another installment of Frizz. Early game highlights included an impressive aerial defense by Victoria to intercept a dime by yours truly. Shank tackling cul de sac buddy Paris on another huck eliminating a fierce competitor with confusing collegiate allegiances from the match for a short period of time, and Crawdad being everywhere in the end zone. The match was fairly even with yellow going up early only to let Pink tie it up in the last 10 minutes on high end throws by Victoria. Turnovers abounded through the game with a few hammers for scores mixed in here and there.
It was noted that the commissioner has rapidly grown the Friday game without planning for additional pennies. Be on the look out for Spyglass to structural changes to the league (i.e. institute a mandatory ufo f3 shirts policy … or get more pennies)
The final moments were decided by a TO off the pull and impressive aerial athletic ability by sweeney_todd. Another hammer sealed the win for yellow. Kudos to Paris for toughing out the injury on worn out ankles.
MvP: Crawdad with at least 4 scores on the day. Final score: 3 – 0 yellow. Non hammer scores do not count. Also it appears the number of ufo f3 shirts accurately predicts the winner. ANNOUNCEMENTS: NONE COT – praise that Jh’s dad’s surgery went well and his recovery – prayer for Chubbs wife rolled anke with 2.0s in tow. Spyglass takes us out.

Sand bags and bad Instructions

Date: 2024-03-23 AO: stonehenge Q: fire_hazard PAX: Cheese Curd, Rehab, wildturkey, Rousey FNGs: None COUNT: 5 6 pax showed up at Stonehenge (3 Prerucked). Bratwurst dropped off some bikes and then left (he couldn’t handle a boot camp….Soccer Arms).
So the Fab five grabbed 3 sand bags (40ish,50,60).
WARMUP: mosey to the OG Btyne garage and do some SSH, IW, and Windmills
THE THANG: Grab the sacks take them to the hill on level 1 and 2 men complete clean and presses while the other go up the steep ass hill and complete 5 burpees, flap jack for 5 rounds.
Head to the ramps. At the bottom of each ramp the two men with out sandbags complete 5 burpees (they are the timer) the other three do one of three exercises at each level 1. Curl 2. Squat 3. overhead press.
We rotate through the sandbags from light to heavy. The man that had the 60lb moves to burpees. This group of exercises took up alot of time with all the levels of the deck. There was some misguidance by the Q and some shenanigans from the PAX. wither way we had fun. Mosey home and complete 26 burpees IC with the last 3 minutes.
MARY: NO ANNOUNCEMENTS: Sign up for WTF COT: Go to Einstein’s

Swingin’ in the Rain…Happy Again

Date: 2024-03-23 AO: olympus Q: Krzyzewski PAX: mighty_mite, ickey_shuffle, Wabbit, MARTA, flipper, The Worm FNGs: None COUNT: 7 Undeterred by the literal gloom, seven pax descended upon the Hot Box for a sneakily brutal workout. Though the weinke looks innocent enough, the sheer repetition wore down even the greatest of grip strength. Nevertheless, the pax powered through aided by solid mumblechatter and a somewhat irreverent playlist. In YHC’s defense, we weren’t THAT close to the church, especially considering the walls surrounding the aforementioned Hot Box. Mumblechatter ranged across topics including the plight of SEC basketball to the oddity of commercials for today’s youth. Great to see a good group out this AM. Let’s get into the recap… WARMUP: 10x swings, prying squats, 5x one-handed swings (e/s), synovial circles, 7x slingshots (e/w) THE THANG: 1) Presses! (10 sets) – Single presses (5x e/s) 2) Swings! (26 min EMOM) – 1-handed swings (10x) 3) Carries! (4 sets) – Farmer’s carries w/ heavy bells (90 sec); 0800 came around right at the ~60 sec mark of the last set, but the farmer’s carries back to the car post-workout rounded out the set in YHC’s opinion MARY: Not today! ANNOUNCEMENTS: – WTF coming up on 4/20 – Likely others have heard this, but learned this week that in a snow storm bison will actually turn into the direction of the storm as they know this will hasten the discomfort and get them through it more quickly. Cattle, on the other hand, turn away and huddle together. So this week, either you face your problems head on and do what needs to be done or avoid them, hope they go away, and prolong the pain. Bison or cow…your choice. – Massive t-claps to Ickey for making YHC aware that this gem of cinematography exists on this planet we call Earth. This might be the single best thing YHC has seen on the Internet in the past month, easily. Claymation Rambo was the chef’s kiss…glorious: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gtffv9bpB-U COT: YHC took out the pax as the men of the Rock got lost in the rain somewhere.

Hand me my balls!

Date: 2024-03-22 AO: the-brave Q: midriff PAX: wildturkey, soft_pretzel, Hippie, wingman, picasso, Odd Job, bratwurst, Franky, kirby, fire_hazard FNGs: None COUNT: 11 The Brave is more than a workout; it’s a crucible where leaders are forged, and limits are tested. Time to bring out the balls and forge some leaders. Our adventure began with basketballs in hand, setting the stage for what was about to be an epic showdown of fitness meets hoops.
Stop on the bridge for some shoulder press. wingman runs ahead for a brief pit stop at the hotel.
Schoolyard Hoops: Our journey led us to Endhaven Elementary, the site of our first challenge. Here, PAX were put to the test with free throws and a rigorous tip drill. The aim? Precision under pressure. We went 0-11, with burpees and laps the due punishment for such inaccuracy. Turns out white man can’t jump or shoot. Unless you’re Jack Gohlke who can indeed shoot 3’s.
Run over to British International School and realize the half court where I wanted to play some 5-on-5 is gated and locked. Franky kindly reminds me that we have only traveresed 2 miles and are nearly half way into the workout. Audible over to the parking lot for some sprints and big boi sit ups.
Mosey back across 485, stopping before the bridge for more wall sits, shoulder press and derkins on the guardrail. bratwurst experiences less anxiety knowing that there’s a grassy knoll behind us now in case the guardrail gives out, instead of 4 lanes of traffic.
Parking Deck Punisher: Work on our ball handling skills while running up levels, doing LBC’s and Dwight Howards. As dawn gave way to day, we capped off our workout with a fierce round of burpees and more sprints, this time in the parking lot in front of AAA. Indigenous people run-dribble-thing in two separate lines back to launch. Finish with a few more, you guessed it, burpees.
Fun times were had by all, by combining fitness and the game of basketball. Thanks bratwurst for taking us out in prayer.

Where’s Oakland, how do you bet on porn, and other questions to ponder…

Date: 2024-03-22 AO: kevlar Q: hoover PAX: Orange Whip, Big League Chew, poptart, Rudy, spackles, ChickenWing, O Tannenbaum, limey FNGs: None COUNT: 9 YHC was tapped yesterday to lead the fine men of Kevlar, a little schedule reshuffling by the site-q’s. At 0528 YHC pulled in to find 8 fine men ready for a beatdown. March Madness talk was already underway and we all had the same question: Where is Oakland?
Other notable topics: getting free $$ from NC sports betting, these apps are all offering free money for a $5 bet. See Spackler for more details. Somewhere along the way, Pop Tart became an advocate for betting on porn through NC sports app betting. We’re all trying to figure out what you’d be betting on, though.
Drinking challenges: – Orange Whip and his wife drink bourbon on their way to Seaboard for bad pizza. – Limey used to do “cannon balls” which is a handle of Carlo Rossi wine between a group of fellow belligerents. basically keep drinking until it’s gone. – Chicken Wing and his college buddies would get 5 guys to a handle of liquor and each one takes a long drink before heading out. Ah, the good ole days. – YHC used to do kill-a-keg which was a competitive drinking team of 9 who had to finish a keg in 45 minutes. You spew on the ground and your out. but, if you spew into your cup and drink it, you stay in.
now onto the stuff we actually did during the workout.
WARMUP: talk about basketball, run around the field twice, decide if the grass is too wet to stay here for the workout THE THANG: 4 corners on the field twice, with a bunch of different exercises. chicken wing needed the form auditors to check if he was doing wide-arm merkins when diamonds were called.
moved on to the gazebo for 7’s with merkins and jump squats. then some rock work while we watched a truck pull into the cemetary to dig up a body (a true dead lift). headed back to the parking lot for a lil bit o …
MARY: Yup, she made an appearance
ANNOUNCEMENTS: WTF, if you don’t want to run just stick around for Kid Rock cooking on the flat top the whole time.
COT: Orange Whip took us out

F3 Gamblers

Date: 2024-03-22 AO: centurion Q: Preschool PAX: Snuka, snowflake FNGs: None COUNT: 3 – Check out the photo for details!

Tiny whiteboard of pain

Date: 2024-03-20 AO: sacs Q: lex_luthor PAX: Starch, Lafleur, wildturkey, Cheese Curd, Roulette FNGs: None COUNT: 6
WARMUP: Lap around the parking lot picking up gear at Lex’s car
THE THANG: 10 stations: 1:15 AMRAP and 15 sec rest. Then 1 lap. Completed 3 rounds 1) stairs with ruck and sandbag 2) stand to kneel with ruck and sandbag 3) ruck merkins 4) squats/ backward lung L &R 5) Lawn movers with ruck and dumbbells 6) dumbbell overhead press with ruck on 7) Russian twist with sandbag or ruck 8) weight rope with ruck on 9) Wandering farmer carry 10) can’t remember or there were only 9
MARY: we got some in ANNOUNCEMENTS: WTF, Savage race and GoRuck lite COT: We were all pretty smoked. Glad to her Starch’s father is recovering.

The Scenic Route

Date: 2024-03-21 AO: _area-51 Q: Pilgrim PAX: Bombay, Carny, Cooter2, Rousey FNGs: None COUNT: 5
WARMUP: Parking lot standard side straddle hops, cherry picker and imperial walker until @Rousey showed up THE THANG: Ran close to 4 miles around Cameron Wood stopping by Pilgrim’s garden and secret passageway followed by a romantic stop at the Pond. @Rousey’s planning on bringing his buddies and dates here, hopefully not at the same time! Intermittent Murkins along the way. MARY: ANNOUNCEMENTS: COT: