The Setup: A charter member of the #ballpit (in fact, the proprietor of the #BALLS meme that started it all) had a long awaited BIG day today. After several previous attempts, Recalculating officially turned 50!!! Far be it from the goons of WUC to let such a joyous occasion pass without a little fun. They say a picture is worth a thousand words…How about 11 different pictures? With several NOT SERIOUS text exchanges and phone calls, the plot was hatched. With a TON of help from our resident PhotoShop Guru, Deflated, it all came together this morning at the last unofficial Floater workout.
The Pre-Workout: A collection of #ballpit members had a pre-run of sorts. By that, I mean we arrived at the AO 30 minutes early to run back and forth from my car to grab another sign and duct tape and apply it to the areas we were going to workout. As it turns out, Waxhaw’s finest post up next to the playground most of the night in order to catch riffraff attempting to vandalize or do the drugs down by the monkey bars. As soon as we’d been ID’d we walked over to the officer. Bottle Cap informed him we were “A part of a men’s workout group”. Luckily, he bought it. He told us the playground was closed from sunset to sunrise, but he’d let it slide this time so long as nobody called in complaints. We thanked him, hung some signs and got on to the next station. By 5:27 we made it back to the COT to take part in a healthy dose of laughs, smiles, and birthday well wishes to Recalculating. Oh, did I mention the Floater shovel flag was unveiled…? It’s got double the flags for double the fun!
The Thang: 5 decades of Recalculating. 5 Stations. 1 additional encounter with local law enforcement. Ready…Go
Station 1: The Warmup (all x10)
SSH, Mtn Climbers, Merkins, Potato Pickers, IW and Mosey to Station #2
Station 2: The Half Wall (both x20)
Box Jumps, Step Ups, and Derkins
Station 3: The Playground (both x 30)
Supposed to be Partner work. Pull-ups and Derkins – Station 3 was interrupted by the same kind police officer. He asked us to leave. Somebody called and complained. Probably Tuck or Goodfella over in Mill Bridge. We cleaned up our signs and moseyed on to Station 4.
Station 4: Railroad Bridge Loop (both x 40)
Dips and Bobby Hurley’s (Recalc’s favorite man and exercise)
At both of the bench areas, do 40 dips, run the loop and/or go over the bridge and do 40 dips at the other side. Then do the same with the BHs.
Mosey to Station 4.9. A little Mary at the LaundroMat. 49 American Hammers…the count might have actually been a little higher, but Foundation had trouble getting past 49…just like Recalculating has for the past couple years.
Station 4.9: Keith Jong Un Death Hill (Partner Up and run to bottom of hill)
Partners combine for 49 burpees. One partner runs to top of hill while other does burpees at the bottom. All under the watchful eye of the hill’s fearless leader Keith Jong Un.
Yet again, we got stuck on 49…it’s happened at least twice.
Two trips up and down the hill for both partner regardless of burpee count (so we did more than 49 burpees, several more…I’d say at least 49 or so).
Mosey back towards COT- found another half-wall. As a final show of respect to Keith Jong Un, we did People’s Chair and 49IC air presses to finish it off.
Circle Time:
It was a privilege to be a part of honoring the #ballfather himself this morning. He’s a great friend and someone many of us look up to (both in age and in character). Happy Birthday, Recalculating. So glad you’re with us. I don’t mean to speak for everybody, but I feel like you’re now worthy of a lot more #RESPECT!
Two FNGs came out this morning. The birthday boy brought his friend with the ironic last name ‘Young’ out today. Mr. Young is now affectionately known as ‘Button’ – as in Benjamin. The second FNG has been a long time coming and a testament to consistently inviting people. Transporter’s 3 year EH finally paid off! Mr. Brown was rendered ‘speechless’ at the end of the workout by how difficult it was. Because he was rendered mute, we named him ‘Teller’ – as in Penn &. Welcome to both of you. We’re thrilled to have you and hope you’ll come back often!
Announcements:
Thursday, February 1st at the Waxhaw Water Tower, The Floater is OFFICIALLY in water. This is the biggest site launch since Cabela’s opened last Friday in Waverly. Come on out for a good time!
AMRAP tomorrow at Impromptu. Come out and test yourself…or just do what the rest of us do and chase Goodfella. He sets and breaks all the records we’ve ever had!
Collage of the many faces of Recalculating will be posted on Slack for reference. Have a great day, Gents!
I took a little saunter down into Union County to see what the boys at Conviction were up to and ended up Qing a “Moderate” beatdown, whatever that means.
Mosey around the back of the school to the bus lot.
Move over to the lines.
COP
Mosey to the front of the school and choose a picnic table.
Mosey back to the cars.
Yoga
Peace,
Deuce
9 men gathered for this week’s installment of Hydra. Special thanks to Marge and Pro for participating in the group text last night only to no-show this morning. Hops is out with a back. Semi Gloss is working on his 5th straight injury. Hannibal only posts when he Qs, otherwise he’s on his fancy indoor yoga bike. No matter – the rest of us we there and ready to go. So after a apparently emotion-free disclaimer, we disappeared quickly into the depths of the AO.
Yog to the field at the back of the AO. Lots of peril along the way, but I think everyone made it. COP with various exercises with a burpee countdown in-between (IW, 10 burpees, merkins, 9 burpees, etc.). This was very popular. I think Hopper did 3 burpees total. Line up (abreast) at the far end of the field. Run to 50ish yard line, 15 reps, back to start, 10 reps, run to far end, 5 reps. We did that three times.
After another dangerous jog through the spooky trail, we gathered at the top of the usual hill behind the AO. Get in groups of three for grinders. We did that for awhile, the moseyed up the road to Rea, stopping at each street light for 5 merkins. Mosey over the benches where I had a little trouble with my instructions. After kind correction by my fellow men, we did 5 derkins, 5 jump ups and 5 inclines. Repeat with 10, then with 5 again. Mosey to the field right behind the school for mary with intermittent “sprints” to run out the clock.
Other notes and observations: Harley didn’t have his customary hat on; that was weird. Hat tip to Horsehead for making the 45 min drive in from East Waxhaw. Puddin’ Pop was complimented on his restraint with his flatulence. He promised to make up for it at Kevlar. I think I heard Tackling Dummy say this was his first post since November – good to have you back. Marge had a weird peach-colored toboggan on. Didn’t slow him down though – he was out front all morning. Thunder Road, fresh off a Base Camp Q earlier in the week, got things done out there. Good stuff, guys.
Wait, what? Didn’t you already read one DMZ backblast this week?
Yes, you did. Hops led a bootcamp in Elizabeth and we got to spend some quality time with Bout Time. It was well attended.
However, despite 800 posts (give or take) to Twitter, Slack, Strava, multiple F3 websites, etc. (even an email went out), a few pax posted to the regular AO. This was actually a good thing just in case an FNG came out of the woodwork. I’m sure, in the moment, there were also some kind words for the site Q. Undaunted, veteran Chappy took the reins and a crew of five headed off into the gloom*:
*as recorded by Frack
Mosey
Speedbump Burpees, 5 each
Cul-de-sac ladder run (6 total reps per cycle)
– Up the hill, 5 burpees
– Down the hill, 1 air squat
– Up, 4
– Down, 2
– Etc.
– End with LBCs OYO
Mosey to Carmel Middle
– Rail slides
– Bear crawls
Mosey to parking lot
– Single-leg line jumpers
– Slalom jumps
Mosey to rock pile, choose small-medium rock
Mosey to parking lot, exercises with rock
– Single-leg line jumpers
– Slalom jumps
Mosey to track, exercises with rock
– Run 400m with rock straight overhead
– Overhead tricep curls
– Curls
– Double-leg line jumpers
– Onos (speedskaters)
– Run 400m with rock (any position you choose)
– LBCs with rock on chest
Mosey to rock pile and return rocks carefully, ensuring a pleasing aesthetic upon departure
Mosey to parking lot, more exercises, including
– LBCs
– Merkins
– Diamond Merkins
– Wide Merkins
– Carolina Drydocks
Mosey back to Carmel Park, including a few final exercises
A challenge was issued: “It is easier for a dromedary camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a PAX to meet the [General] Merkin Challenge in a single workout this late in the month.” Sixteen men were up for that challenge, though only four knew of it ahead of time. (Read Slack, Pax.)
Warm-up:
Capri Posse Lap with 10 merkins in each corner
COP:
(50 merkins total so far)
The THANG
(100 merkins total so far)
(145 merkins total so far)
(170 merkins total so far)
Mosey back to the HS parking lot
(260 merkins total)
Moleskin:
Sir Winston Churchill died on this date 53 years ago. He is believed to have said, “Success is the ability to go from one merkin to another with no loss of enthusiasm.” YHC was concerned with the daunting task of completing the merkin challenge during the workout and not completely boring the PAX at the same time, but the spirit of the British Bulldog pushed him forward.
That task was accomplished flawlessly. The PAX enjoyed YHC’s usual introduction of a new and strange exercise in the COP — this time it was the Annie. The PAX is now ready to scrub floors this weekend in a spirited and loving show of affection towards the many deserving Ms in the F3 Nation. A bonus “new and strange” was the Clock Merkin which had the PAX singing songs of praise for analog timekeeping devices and excited that there was no mention of digital devices which would have kept the group pointing the same direction.
Other shots of acclaim came as the PAX shuffled through the dark to find bench space for dips and then gladly crawled under the bench for supines and gently extracted themselves to return to dips. The only disappointment came when the PAX did not engage in full Ascending Testicles merkins, because they really wanted to climb higher on the wall. Finally, the utter beauty of the logistics of the tree run and doing knee-based pointer dogs on a gravelly parking lot was also well received.
On an individual level, huge props to Offline who was an FNG a mere 24 hours earlier, but posted for the second day in a row with great gusto. Bottlecap shows excellent form in Star Jacks and could easily gain part-time employment at the Waxhaw YMCA when it opens. Xerox (R) is always up for a good J-Lo reference and this morning he turned that in with the driveway shape. Recalculating showed up for one disrespectful post before… advancing in wisdom and stature. The Posse lap did not produce Posse so perhaps more marketing is needed to make that a thing. Johnny Utah (R) took us out and had a good news reminder that the Lord will bless and St. Judes does awesome things for people going through tough situations, so remember the good around us.
Overall, it was a fantastic morning at Dromedary and YHC is sure that Sir Winston Churchill would agree. Another of his quips rings true: “History Blackblast will be kind to me for I intend to write it.”
Annoucements:
It’s Bullwinkle’s Anniversary Q. It’s been a year since he began to arrive at F3 workouts late, talk trash, skip reps and become literally half the man he used to be in that good F3 way. He asked for this Q last Friday in honor of his anniversary and we gladly gave it to him. Unfortunately, his Q was problematic. Main problem being he didn’t show up. This left us in a quandary. We could honor him by skipping the workout entirely or one of us is going to have to be an emergency Bullwinkle anniversary Q. I had a secondary plan for a Q that I did recently (and failed to do a BB for) so I decided to implement it here. Let’s go.
Mosey around the parking lot since it is supposed to be a running gear workout (some of you forget the running part but I am a voice for lonely gear such as shoes).
COP
SSH IC x25
IW IC X20
Abe Vagoda IC x10
Grab your bell, choose a partner and let’s mosey over to the hill. Country Living seems to believe a bigger bell means something. I tend to believe it’s compensating for something else that’s smaller. But, either way, let’s move on to the actual work.
DORA 1-2-3 w/ KB
100 Goblet Squats
200 Curls
300 Swings
Partner 1 runs up the hill backwards on snow and does 10 bombjacks. Partner 2 does the KB exercises. Flapjack as necessary until all exercises if done. If done early, do sets of 10 each of the three exercises until all teams are done. This took some time esp those swings
Recovery mosey around the parking lot.
Time for a DORA .5-1-1.5 w/ KB
50 Tricep Extensions
100 Skullcrushers w/ Leg Lifts (KB and legs meet at your midsection)
150 Flutter Presses w/KB
10 LBCs at the top of the hill and this time a regular run up the hill.
Recovery mosey around the parking lot.
Back to KB for a few Mary exercises.
Rosalita w/ KB press IC x20
Rosalita (no KB) IC x25
Backscratchers IC x20
DONE!!!
Moleskine
– Without a plan, this ended up working out well anyways. Much grumbling = Success
– Shepherd wiped out at some point. In proper Pastor form, I heard no cussing and not even a Christian cussing word like shoot or dangit. #example
– Country Living watched my form a lot. Especially on the Goblet Squats I think. The staring is weird. #metoo
– I should have wrote this BB last Friday as I can’t remember as much of the mumblechatter. #BBlazy #guilty
– Kotters to Jabberwocky. He’s no longer dead to me. Countertop is still #deadtome
Backblasts
Speaking of which, as a man who wears yoga pants has announced on the F3UC FB page, it’s proper form for a Q to do a Backblast. They are helpful if you need to reference exercises later and just good for busting balls. You should do them. And by you, I mean me. I’m guilty too and will try to pick this up. Hold me accountable if I don’t.
Glass Joe
Fourteen men got out of bed a bit earlier than most to make a difference in themselves. We met up at South Charlotte Middle School. Weather was cool and dry – So off we went.
We made a few laps around the parking lot to collect a few 5:31’rs. Now we are really ready.
COP
We circled up at the flagpole for a disclaimer and started off with: IW x 15, LSS x 15, Merkin x 10 and LBC x 15
Thang:
Starting at the top of the hill on Woodfox we ran down to Fireman Ed circle (aka Burning Tree Dr) and did: Low Slow Merkin x 15, LBC (center, right and left) x 15 each and 15 Drydocks. Then we run back up to the top of the hill. This circuit was completed three times.
After reconvening in the parking lot, we lined up along the side walk ledge and completed the Wheel of Merkin twice (5 x in each position).
We paired up in two man teams at the bottom of the steps. Partner 1 took a running rock and ran up the steps and around the short loop while partner 2 did: supine pull ups, steps ups and dips (10 x each exercise).
Skin:
Everyone pushed hard today, especially running up the hill multiple times. We got in about 2.5 miles. There was some expected grumbling and a few protests but we all made it through. Perhaps we made ourselves just a bit better than we were yesterday.
Fireman Ed was not present this AM. Perhaps the cadence count could have been louder down in the circle. Maybe we would have shaken him loose from the fart sack.
Insomniac – It was great to see you but when did you get there? I first noticed you about 6:14.
Announcements:
Our prayers continue to be with Bout Time, Jennings and his family.
So the rains flew by in the night leaving wet streets, a few puddles and a decent temperature for running. My plans were simply to venture out a bit…and that we did. Quick disclaimer to some regulars and off we went.
Of course lots of pontificating on what “least popular territory” I was referring to in the pre-tweet. Once the group passed the first mile mark with no sign of stopping, there was an annoyed buzz in the air. Alas we reached Beverly Crest after 2 miles straight of Hwy 51. From there we split up on a lovely wide street ran opposite directions doing 15 merkins at the end then rejoining for 15 jump squats in the middle. Most repeated it twice, some had to cut it short, some did extra. And then with 20 minutes remaining we headed back….(Queue the music)
Personally, I felt pretty good en route to Beverly Crest and not too bad during the back and forth…although the hill on one side snuck up on me. Going back, once we crossed Providence, dodged traffic to get back on the south side of 51, it became a decent haul and my pace slowed. There was lots of chatter along the way both ways directions: Alf was bragging to Pop Tart about his Hokies embarassing the Tar Heels the night before. Rachel, Purple Haze and I were just commenting on the puddles and pace. I didn’t hear much from Margo and ReTread both focused on the long haul. Astro cruised along reminiscing of colder days and his warm beanie. What wasn’t Benny talking about?!
Great group this am. Minimum distance was 6 miles, max was just over 7. Thanks to Haze and Rachel for letting me lead. Thanks to Astro for the takeout prayer.
Despite the rain that woke most overnight and the rain on the windshield on the way in, 12 PAX still figured it was time for some Brolympics level speed.
The Thang:
Moleskin:
SYITG,
Bratwurst
From now on, the only woman I’m pimpin’ is sweet lady propane. And I’m trickin’ her out all over this town.
Hank Hill
A dozen posted in questionable weather for a little King of the Hill. The count would have been one less, had I not signed up on the Skunkworkgenius, but leadership and all . . .
Thang:
Skin:
It’s always fun to draw the rain Q card. It seems the longer I do this F3 thing, the less inclined I am to want to go and crawl around in the mud and crud. Let’s say that I have developed a more refined palette. Well preference be hanged, it was pouring rain when I flopped out of the sack this morning but the little guy on my shoulder thumped me in the ear and sped me on my way.
I had some other things planned that involved grass and a field and probably a good bit of mud, but that seemed about as dicey as a Craig’s List babysitter so we extended the thrills on the hills.
Blazing saddles was wearing a mysterious vest. I can’t remember if he had on short sleeves under it or not. I don’t trust a man who wears a vest with short sleeves. That’s like a belt and suspenders, but without the fashion benefits. Funny thing, Lex came up to me asking if I had seen a missing vest before the workout. Then Blaze is running around with this mysterious vest on, and Lex just ignores it. It was definitely an elephant in the room.
Harley was begging to go stand under the tennis court pavilion the whole time. I wasn’t sure if he wanted the whole group to go, or just us two, and it got a little weird for a few mins there. I changed the subject pretty quickly but I hope I didn’t hurt his feelings.
Tweetsie and Lois are inseparable. I heard that once Lois convinced Tweetsie to bust into the bottom layer of the M’s Whitman’s sampler before the top layer had been completely polished off. I think that was a pretty awkward Valentine’s day for everyone involved.
It’s good to have Country Livin back with us. He vanished for a couple of years. Word on the street was that he was banned from the local Lowes for using the display toilet and things escalated from there. Anyway, he looks slim and trim and it’s good to see him again.
Haven’t had that much fun at church since I got kicked out of the sanctuary for teaching the kids about Jeremiah the Bullfrog during the Christmas cantata. I’m sure there was a lot more going on that I missed. I was in the zone dawg. Gonna feel that one soon.
– Horsehead