Author Archive Lois

Androgynous tights in the candy store

EDITOR’S NOTE: Lois posting this way way wayyyyy late for Madoff. I like to set the best example as a Site Q. Cobains. 

A few weeks back, YHC was set to VQ at Peak 51. Not wanting to disappoint, YHC spent more time than was necessary preparing a weinke that would balance the need to deliver a sufficient PAX beatdown while simultaneously ensuring that said weinke would not leave YHC off doing the technicolor yawn while the more seasoned PAX wondered why they let a Clydesdale Q…it’s a classic VQ dilemma. “No problem,” thought YHC…”we’ll just plank and do merkins ‘til our arms give out.” Right then.

Unfortunately, that initial VQ was interrupted by what appeared to be God’s version of the ice bucket challenge, so the VQ had to wait a few weeks. So today, 10 brave PAX finally got a chance to enter the candy store at Peak.

24 degrees 5:30 AM:

Disclaimer may or may not have been given: memories fade fast in the sub-freezing gloom. Mosey on over to the church lot and the fun begins.

Warm Up

  • 20 SSH IC
  • 10 CHINOOKS IC (PAX were already questioning the VQ weinke after this one)

Mosey over to the bus lot where the fun continues.

The Thang

PLANK RELAY: ROUND #1 (…a real crowd pleaser)

PAX divide up into two teams of 5. Teams assume standard shoulder plank. 1st team member runs a lap, then rejoins team in plank.  Next man up and repeato until all team members finish.

EMOM (Every Minute on the Minute)

This is a circuit exercise that follows a simple pattern of Merkins, LBC’s, and Squats.  Every 5 minutes, PAX perform 5 sets of called exercises (1 set per minute). Reps increase every 5 minutes as well. R1 & R2 lulled the PAX to sleep with low reps and standard Merkins. R3 & R4 provided a 1st F reveille with higher rep counts and Diamond Merkins.

  • Round 1: 5 Merks, 5 LBCs, 5 Squats
  • Round 2: 5 Merks, 5 LBCs, 10 Squats
  • Round 3: 10 Merks, 15 LBCs, 15 Squats     
  • Round 4: 15 Merks, 15 LBCs, 15 Squats


PAX divide up into teams of 3 or 4. Teams assume shoulder to shoulder chilly plank. Ist team member runs the length of the bus lot and reassumes chilly plank. Call is given to the next team member, and on we go until all PAX have run down the bus lot and back again.

Mosey back to Launch, with an abbreviated round of ABC’s for Mary.


Given that YHC’s perspective on running is that it’s what you do when you need to get away from a stronger opponent, this weinke was light on gazelle training. The unintended side effect of this, when combined with extreme cold, was an abundance of perplexing mumble chatter.

The PAX, particularly Bernie, took an immediate interest in Sardine’s choice of tights. Though unconfirmed, the unofficial opinion of the PAX is that the tights must have come from the no man’s land area of Marshalls: that group of clothing racks separating the mens and womens sections. We may never know…

The mumblechatter took a turn for the worse when YHC, in an attempt to entertain the PAX between EMOM intervals, attempted a version of “Kids Say the Darndest Things,” which included an observation from YHC’s Junior PAX #2 of certain body parts looking like candy.

Clearly, YHC and his bride need to do a better job of vetting the Halloween candy stashes next year. Given that the PAX were already boarded and fastened into their seats on the crazy train by this point, it is only fitting that the mumble chatter eventually landed us on some form of odd cousin love confession from Tweetsie. YHC’s bride says that the mountains of NC have a strange effect on the body and mind. After Tweetsie’s confession, YHC agrees.

All in all, YHC is thankful to the PAX for showing up this AM for a sub-freezing VQ. On some level, all 3 F’s were represented out in the gloom, and YHC was happy to have been a part.


Gremlin: Saturday, January 19

Best way to stay warm is just to run …

Editor’s note: Lois posting on behalf of Sensei.

My thermometer said 25 at 5am, and since I was Q at Sparta I kinda had to get up and go. I wasn’t sure how many other guys would show up, but at 5:15 there were 11 folks with just as questionable judgment as myself in the Matthews Elementary parking lot. The plan was simple: When it’s really cold, the best way to stay warm is to run, and keep running. Since Sparta is a running workout, the Weinke took care of itself.

We launched out from MES and ran the Labor Day Kiwanis 5K course (AKA the Peak 51 pre-run route).

Once we got back to Trade St. via Charles, we looped back around to Ames, hung a right on John St. and ran up to Christ Covenant Church.

We were still good on time so we cut through the church parking lot over to Fullwood, ran down to Trade St. took a left and headed back to the launch point.

It was 6:07, so rather than stand around we ran a couple of laps around First Baptist church for the remaining time.

By 6:15 we stopped and had 6 miles in. Not a bad days’ work.

We stopped along the route to do squats, feet shuffle, or whatever guys do to stay warm to wait on the 6. Though, this was a strong crowd so we did not have to wait much at all.

Chilly Skin:

Most of us got in 2 laps around the church at the end, but Stone Cold got in 3. Strong work, sir.

Supposedly The Mouth was there. It sounded like him, but The Mouth is usually a warm weather creature; it was December and it was hard to tell with the balaclava covering all but his eyes. Seriously, thanks for coming out. See you again in… June???

You know it’s cold when Strange Brew is wearing a shirt.

Sparta is a great workout. I think this is only the 2nd time I have not attended Peak 51 in my 4+ years of F3.

Gypsy, a Sparta regular was Q for Peak today. Since we share a launch point we may do some additional Q swapping in the future.

You can’t go wrong posting to either workout. Great folks all around.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead and run with the Sparta crowd.

Don’t go back to Biscuitville

Six descended on the venerable Scout Hut at Matthews United Methodist to work out a few kinks, tweaks and twinges at Gumby.

This was a group of Gumby vets, so, a disclaimer was given where YHC might have yada-yada’d.

Lighting: Regular … YHC was thinking Bambi lamp, but, wasn’t exactly in a stable mindset (more on that in a minute)

Music: YHC’s “Gin Blossoms Radio” on Pandora, which has, thanks to lots of thumbs up/thumbs downs, been algorithm’d to an enjoyable mix of 90s/early 2000s jangle pop and some rock favorites. It’s the large adult son of Pandora stations.

Devotional: From the old classic, Our Daily Bread, a devo on winning and losing. That whole “stable mindset” thing earlier was mentioned because last night, YHC’s flag football team lost in the playoffs. We still have a game left … a consolation/3rd place game … but, not playing for the championship is, well, hard. The devo has a good word on winning, losing and perspective. Now, the question is, how long does YHC stew on the loss and when does YHC actually pay attention to the devo he offered?

Okay, let’s go …

Corpse pose for devotional

Knees up, feet at your 6. Windshield wiper left and right, following your breath.

Hold on the left, right arm out and looking right, then flapjack, hold on the right, left arm out and looking left.

Move to tabletop for some cat and cow. After that, check your 6 with some side bends.

Move to child’s pose, moving your arms to the right, back to the middle, back to the left, then back to the middle.

Up to the top of the mat. One sun salutation lead by the Q, then 2 OYO.

Back down on your back, grab a strap or a rope.

Strap around your right foot, stretch it straight up. Try and get deeper with every exhale. Swing your leg straight down to the right. Bring it back up. Flapjack.

Now, move over onto your left side. Strap around your right foot, then, bring your right leg up for a combo hamstring/inner thigh stretch. This was (1) new (2) led by a Q with bad form, but once the Q said what should be stretched, everyone else was able to get where they needed. Leg down and flapjack.

Up to mountain, 2 sun salutations OYO.

Then a half-SS, stopping in downward dog, right leg up and hold for a 3-legged dog, then swing through to warrior 1.

Move from warrior 1 to warrior 2 to warrior 3 to peaceful warrior to warrior 2.

In warrior 2, face the wall in a star pose, then descend to where your hands are on the mat. A professional like Witch Doctor would tell you to move, flexing each individual vertebrae. YHC is not a professional.

Walk your hands back toward your 6. Then over to the right leg, then to the left, then back to the middle, then back up, moving back to warrior 2. Go to warrior 3, then peaceful, then 2, then 1, then back to mountain.


Go through that whole rigamarole again on the other side. This time, when it came to the star pose, descend, then do the ninja pose, left foot turned up on its heel, left leg straight, sitting back on your right foot. Flapjack, then back up and finish the warrior rigamarole.

Okay, time to sit in the chair, so chair. Then we moved to awkward pose, which is like chair, except your arms are out straight. YHC discovered in his research that there are multiple awkwards ….

Move to awkward 2 (aka “more awkward”) which is the standard awkward pose, but, you are up on the balls of your feet. This will make your legs go into revolt.

Then, move to awkward 3 (aka “most awkward”), which, while still on the balls of your feet and hands out, squat. This is not much better.

Back to awkward 2, awkward 1, chair, recover.

Gypsy chimes in at this point. “That was awful.” Yeah, it was. So, let’s do that again. Repeato chair/awkward series.

Back to mountain, let’s make like a tree. So, get into tree, right foot up, balancing on your left leg. Down. Before we flapjack, let’s keep it in the tree family with a new pose, the palm. So, from mountain, get up on the balls of your feet, arms up, hands open and meeting above your head. Down. Now, standard tree on the other side.

About this time, “Everlong” by the Foo Fighters pops up. If you are a fan of FF, you know that this is typically their closer at a concert. Here is an example from when YHC saw them in ColumbiYEAH last year about this time. So, it’s serendipitous, because we’re in the home stretch.

Move into downward dog, right foot up and through for pigeon. Come out of that, flapjack.

Back to corpse pose, revisit the devotional, then, time’s up.





Gypsy still looking for PAX for Speed for Need at the Let Them Soar 5K on November 10. It is launching from Christ Covenant, home of Skunk Works and Kevlar, and goes through downtown Matthews.


Alright, so, yeah, I’m trying not to be grouchy or sulk in the wake of losing a playoff game with a group that I thought could possibly win the whole thing. I am competitive, I don’t like losing, I love winning even more. Plus, I try and take it seriously and put on an air of professionalism for the kids and their families.

Bottom line, losing stinks.

Bottom(er) line, coming up with a quality #weinke when you’re in the throes of that moment is an interesting exercise, especially when I wanted to sprinkle in a couple of new things.

So, the variances on awkward were found in basic Google research last night. The palm pose came as a result of Hurricane Florence. As a proud cord-cutter, I like the options available to have live TV through streaming. Now, during Florence, we had a brief Internet outage on that Saturday (thankfully it came back before the noon kickoff slate), and I was flipping through the network/OTA offerings. On a PBS subchannel, I found a yoga show. Apparently, it is a PBS production called “Yoga in Practice.”

Some of the things the ladies were doing were a little beyond broga, but the palm is one I picked up.

Today, the #mumblechatter was quality over quantity, and centered around two things:

  1. Gypsy arrived late and had to MacGyver the strap around his yoga mat to help with the strap exercises, as all of the good Boy Scout ropes were taken by the other PAX.
  2. An ad for Biscuitville popped up during a break in the music, and Tweetsie just threw it out there “Is Biscuitville better than Bojangles?”. Although I think no one in the room has ever actually been to Biscuitville, it was determined to be inferior to Bojangles because (a) it has only breakfast/lunch hours, and you can get a cajun filet biscuit anytime at Boj and (b) because, as I put it, “I can’t, in good conscience, drive past a Bojangles to go to Biscuitville,” which is what I would have to do to get to Indian Trail and the nearest Biscuitville.

So, there you have it. Another edition of Gumby in the books. Hopefully you left feeling a little better. Thanks to Swiss Miss and Tweetsie for the opportunity to lead. It is a privilege and an honor.



Stumptown beatdown

Editor’s note: Lois posting on behalf of Thumper. This was good. I still can’t feel my legs.

As I was pulling into the AO, Gypsy and 8 other Sparta running maniacs were blazing a trail. 11 others joined me on our Peak 51 adventure.

No FNGs, so the standard disclaimer was given and we took off to Stumptown Park.


  • SSH x 15
  • IW x 15
  • LSS x 10
  • Good Morning x10
  • Peter Parker x 10
  • Parker Peter x 10

The Thang:

Dora 1-2-3: Partner (A) runs around the loop at Stumptown Park while Partner (B) does said exercise:

  • Merkins x 100
  • LBCs x 200
  • Squats x 300

Plank while waiting for 6.

Mosey to parking lot behind the First Baptist Church and partner up with someone new.

Partner (A): Run to the top of the lot and do 5 burpees while Partner (B) does exercise:

  • Carolina Dry Docks x 100
  • Dolly x 100
  • Jump Squats x 100

Mosey back to starting point for some Mary:

  • Not-so-Lazy Boy (middle, right, middle, left, middle ~ 10 sec each)
  • ABC’s – big capital letters…lots of moaning and groaning here …
  • Flutter x 20 (Tweetsie led – thanks)
  • LBCs x 20 OYO


The End


  • F3 Dads at Kinetic Heights this Sunday afternoon.
  • Crane Relay – Oct 26th
  • Let Them Soar, 5K 11/10/18.

Thanks to Tweetsie for taking us out!

Skunks activate beast mode

So, one of the worst beatdowns YHC has ever survived was, well, about this time a year ago, when Smokey Q’d this very workout the Tuesday after the Tennessee Volunteers took a bad loss to Florida. At the time, YHC thought, “Man, that’s rough to take out your football team’s frustrations on a group of unsuspecting PAX.”

So, this past Saturday, YHC’s South Carolina Gamecocks took a bad loss (again) to Kentucky. Guess who is Q’ing Skunk Works, y’all?

So, after a lovely disclaimer where Tulip may or may not have been thrown under the bus due to his absence, 12 PAX buckled up with their bells and, well, it went a little something like this:


  • Mosey to the rock, touch it, mosey back
  • Side-straddle hops x20 IC
  • 10 swings OYO
  • Imperial walker x20 IC
  • 15 swings OYO
  • Mountain climber x20 IC
  • 20 swings OYO
  • And, since Chin Music and Header didn’t want to join in the first time, mosey to the rock, touch it, mosey back


Gather at the corner of the track to battle The Beast — with apologies to Smokey, Header and Sanka. For the uninformed, it’s 6 reps each at 6 stations, 6 different exercises. If anyone felt uneasy doing this, they were informed that they could do 7 reps. #ModifyAsNeeded.

So, the 6 stations were the 4 corners of the track, along with the middle of the straightaways. This is a fun routine as is, let’s see how fun it is with KBs thrown in, as, well, you have to mosey with the KB between stations.

  • Round 1: Curls
  • Round 2: Squats
  • Round 3: Swings
  • Round 4: Upright rows
  • Round 5: On-bell merkins
  • Round 6: Good mornings

We peppered in 20 LBCs after round 2, 20 flutters after round 4 and 20 Freddie Mercuries after round 6.

After battling The Beast, let’s line up on the straightaway for the track. As repentance for invoking the mark of the beast with 6s, let’s make the next thing uplifting by invoking the number of Biblical perfection with some 7s.

Start with 1 overhead press, run to the other end of the field, do 6 bomb jacks (some PAX had a different name for this that, well, YHC can’t even remember).

Run back, 2 OHP, run, 5 bomb jacks, etc. etc. etc. until we’ve reached 6 OHP and 1 bomb jack.

Finally, partner up. Let’s make this easy —

  • Partner 1 does called exercise, in this case, lawnmowers
  • Partner 2 runs to the other end, does a burpee, runs back
  • Flapjack until we’ve reached 100 reps.

Enough of that, head back to the parking lot, circle up for …


  • Dolly x20 IC
  • Heels to heaven x15 IC
  • Rosalita x15 IC

Time called.


  • Count-o-rama
  • Name-o-rama
  • Nice takeout by Chin Music



Let them SOAR! 5K coming November 10. It’s a race + Speed for Need launching from the home of Skunk Works, Christ Covenant/Covenant Day. Pre-blast here.


As stated before, The Beast is a go-to for me when I Q. I’ve never attempted, nor made others attempt, to do it with KBs. It was, well, a beast of a workout. Getting around the backside of the track, the bell started to get a little heavy.

And speaking of heavy bells, Funky Cold had it kind of rough. Apparently Dollywood (absent) has his normal bell, so he was borrowing a 45-lb bell. Upon hearing this news, I immediately felt pretty bad. Not bad enough to change anything, but, sorry nonetheless.

Tweetsie was a bit confused by the format of the workout, as he tried to bolt ahead of the rest of the PAX when we all stopped for the 2nd station on the track.

#Mumblechatter was interesting on my end, as I learned about the state of athletics at Carmel Christian from Header, and the state of private-school education in the area with Header, Arena and Yeti. Apparently, even though I am a longtime member of Carmel Baptist, I didn’t realize we had some ringer teams taking the field for CCS. Hey, I’m in favor of it.

Also glad to have Smokey back after his stint in New Bern, I think it was, doing relief work in the wake of Hurricane Florence. Keep all those affected in your prayers.

Chime in with any missed #mumblechatter.

Great work all around this morning. This workout is an essential part of my week, and it was an honor to lead this esteemed group of #HIM.

Thanks to Funky Cold and Tulip for the opportunity.


On the backstreets until the end

A wild bunch of PAX gathered in the gloom at Matthews Elementary School for this week’s edition of Peak 51, only to find out, we weren’t staying too long at the school.

After a decent disclaimer, including the fact that we would be on a road trip today, we took off for what turned into an extended warmup.

Mosey to the First Baptist lot via the short route … circle up.


  • Side-straddle hops x20 IC
  • Imperial walker x20 IC

Mosey to the BB&T lot beside Mac’s Speed Shop … circle up.

COP, Part Deux

  • Mountain climbers x20 IC
  • Low, slow squat x20 IC

Cross John Street, carefully, and mosey to the perilously slanted small lot kinda-sorta behind Renfrow Hardware … circle up.

COP, Part Tre

  • Hillbilly x20 IC
  • Windmill x15 IC

The windmills were cut short because Slim Fast and Tweetsie guided this part way off the rails. More on that later.

Mosey on, turning left at the attorney’s office, stopping at the Pizza Peel … circle … well, not a lot of room, so just get in where you fit in.

COP, Part IV

  • Merkins x10 IC

Finally, mosey down to the front of the Town Hall/Library.


Okay, partner up for some Dora 1-2-3. Pretty easy — one partner does the exercise, other partner runs the traffic circle, flapjack, finish when you have reached the cumulative number of exercises.

  • Round 1: 100 Carolina dry docks
  • Round 2: 200 flutters (civilian count)
  • Round 3: 300 LBCs

Requisite planking in between sets.

Stay with your partner, take off in different directions around the circle and run. When you meet up, do 5 hand-slap partner merkins. After that, lunge walk until you meet again, then do another round of hand-slap partner merkins.

Once that was done, time to start moseying back. This time, we take the more direct route — head up to Trade Street and hang a left. We stopped a couple of times to do some squats until the 6 rolls in, including the Trade/John intersection where we were stopped by the speedy stoplight, where we wound up doing more squats than we bargained for.

Arrive back to launch to find our Sparta friends doing burpees. Note, even though there might have been some grumbling, please note YHC ordered no burpees. #YouAreWelcome


LBCs x?? IC — Tweetsie led while YHC gathered his phone.

Rosalita x20? IC — again, #mumblechatter and the Tower of Babel level of different languages counting along made this difficult.

Heels to Heaven xI don’t remember IC.

Time called.




Takeout by Tweetsie.



  • If you are interested in Qing Peak, talk to Lois and/or Sensei. The schedule is wide open. Swiss Miss has next Thursday.
  • Isabella Santos Run, 9/29/18:
  • F3 Dads at Kinetic Heights – see #F3Dads channel on Slack
  • Crane Relay, 10/26
  • Let Them Soar, 5K 11/10/18:
  • The 2019 Blue Ridge Relay is just around the corner … get on a team today, or, better yet, ask Slim Fast what team you are on.


After being away two weeks — one for BRR tapering, and one because of a post-BRR crud — it was good to get back out to Peak and put in some work. Even though a lot of us are a little tired of running at this point of the year, I wanted to get out and hit up a different locale. The Town Square area is a great spot that we haven’t hit up for a while, so, that’s where I wanted to head.

The irony of the whole thing is that Sparta regular Arsenal joined us, because I think he was looking for a little less running this morning versus the 4-5 miles usually put in by the Spartans. FWIW, it was a little more than 2 miles, so, technically, he got what he wanted.

The traveling COP was intended to help break up the run to the Town Hall and keep the group together. It was not without a couple of bumps.

First, there was the female BB&T employee who ventured out from the bank to her truck to find us working on good squat form.

Then, things really got out of hand when we were in the parking lot off of Cotton Gin Alley. When I called for the hillbilly, Slim Fast just started lobbing grenades at Tweetsie, calling it the mating dance of App State alums. While they were throwing jabs at each other, the rest of us were trying to, you know, actually do the exercise called. Then Slim tried to Q jack a bit by counting the number of reps he finished versus everyone else. #TexasMath

The 1-2-3 is a simple F3 staple that is always easy to throw out, but not necessarily easy to accomplish. All of the PAX just ripped it. Also, there were a lot of good sweat angels/imprints on the bricks and pavement that we were all admiring.

When the meet-your-partner portion was called, I rounded the turn to the meeting spot, and Sardine just came flying through like he was a car in a Fast and Furious movie. I was actually a little afraid he wouldn’t be able to stop amidst all that #LarryBird-ing.

About halfway through the lunge walk, there was grumbling, and for good reason. It was perhaps a little far. Of course, when I called for a modification to just go ahead and meet up, Tweetsie decided to back up to make me come all the way to the exact middle. Thanks.

The final bit of absurdity came when we were stuck at the Trade/John intersection, with its notoriously slow light. So, there we are, a bunch of guys just doing squats on the corner. Don’t mind us. Thumper and a couple of other PAX decided to take an available window and jaywalk (jayrun?) across the street and get moving. Those of us who respect the law were not too far behind.

Swiss Miss says there is a website where you can offer feedback on the performance of stop lights — I think we all need to lodge a complaint. After all, we are legion.

Oh, also, #kotters to Early Bird and Entourage! Great to have both of you back.

Sound off with any #mumblechatter I might have missed. Excellent work all around … you guys make Peak great and are what F3 is all about. It’s an honor to lead y’all.



Double check the Calendar

Editor’s Note: Lois posting for Sensei.

12 men rolled out to the Peak this morning, to be joined later by 3 from Sparta to get a jump start on the day. With BRR kicking off tomorrow, YHC wanted to get in a shake out run mixed in with some moderate bootcamp exercises.

While I am certain BRR kicks off tomorrow, I am not quite as certain that it is September with temps in the mid 70s and the humidity hovering somewhere in the 90s. Did they move it to July? Anyways, it is what it is; put one foot in front of the other; it’s just a hill, get over it; shut up and run; insert your favorite running motivational line here.

No FNGs, so a quick and heartfelt disclaimer was given and off we went.

Run around the front of FBC to the driveway beside MAC’s and circle up for COP

  • SSH x 20
  • IW x 20
  • Forward Arm Circles x 10
  • Backward Arm Circles x 10
  • Merkins x 10

Mosey to the bottom of FBCM side parking lot and line up

  • Run to the top of parking lot and do 15 CDDs
  • Run to bottom of parking lot and do 15 LBCs
  • Repeato x 4

Mosey over to the track and partner up

  • P1 run in one direction, P2 run in the other direction
  • When you meet, do 10 Hand Slap Merkins
  • Continue around the track and do 10 Squats when you meet
  • Repeato x 2

Mosey over to the monkey bars

  • Pull Ups x 5
  • Lunges x 10 each leg
  • Repeato x 3

Back to the track and repeato earlier partner work x 2

  • Broga Time!
  • Hammie stretch, middle, right, left
  • Runner’s Lunge right, left
  • Pigeon Stretch right, left

Back to launch and done.

Sweaty Moleskin:

  • The Peak crowd shows up ready to work hard every week, and today was no exception. Nice work men. I appreciate humoring me for my glorified shake out run prior to BRR tomorrow.
  • Slim Fast took note of everyone who was there, and the 3 who joined us at the end for Sparta. I think he has already submitted your names for a BRR team next year. The sooner you accept it, the better for us all.
  • Seriously, there are several guys who have joined Peak over the past few months who could absolutely go out and run whatever they want. Whether you sign up for a CSAUP event or not, keep coming out. You are what makes Peak so fun.
  • Excellent takeout by Little Mike

A Starfish has how many points?

Editor’s Note: Lois posting on behalf of Bernie, who did an outstanding job on his VQ.

13 PAX showed up at Peak this morning for YHC’s VQ. It’s only been a few months since I first posted with F3, but I have enjoyed every minute of it. The fellowship, banter and accountability have been what keep me coming back. Anyway, enough with the mushy stuff, let’s get down to it.

Brief disclaimer and we were off.


  • SSHs IC X 25
  • Imperial Walker IC X 20
  • Windmill IC X 14 (this one really threw the PAX off, and myself for that matter)

The Thang

Mosey over to the bus lot for a round of Starfish workouts. There was discussion as to how many points a Starfish has, some thought 4, some 6. One week at Peak we did a 4 corner starfish, which really had me scratching my head. After my pre-Q research it was confirmed that there were in fact 5 points on a Starfish. As a side note from my research, did you know they make Starfish Sushi? Disgusting…

Anyways, the 5 points of the Starfish were as follows:

  • 20 Derkins
  • 20 Merkins
  • 20 Diamond Merkins
  • 20 Wide Arm Merkins
  • 20 Carolina Dry Docks

Every time the PAX were in the middle there were 30 LBCs, that’s 180 for those counting at home (we started in the middle).

Plank for the six.

There was some confusion as to where the middle of the parking lot actually was, so Smokey lent us his hat with the Power T on it as a marker. I think this was also the first time I had ever seen Smokey workout without something on his dome.

Lap around the track to come back to the middle for another round of Starfish, but opted for legs this time.

  • 15 Peter Parkers
  • 15 Lunges per leg
  • 15 Sister Mary Catherines
  • 15 Bomb Jacks
  • 15 Jump Squats

15 Flutter Kicks per leg in the middle.

Editor’s note: Lois again … I did 20 flutters in the middle. What the what?

YHC was initially worried about time management and was unsure if we would be able to get a few other things in. The PAX blew through the above exercises and left us with plenty of time for the other things on the Weinke.

The great news was we had time for some Jack Webbs, the bad news was I don’t really like Jack Webbs. But in sticking to the plan we rolled with it. There was a little banter from Sensei encouraging the Q “to not modify as needed”, so we all pushed through.

  • 1 Merkin – 4 Air Presses
  • 2 Merkins – 8 AP
  • 3 Merkins – 12 AP
  • 4 Merkins – 16 AP
  • 5 Merkins – 20 AP
  • 4 Merkins – 16 AP
  • 3 Merkins – 12 AP
  • 2 Merkins – 8 AP
  • 1 Merkin – 4 Air Presses

Glad that’s down, but I am sure somewhere down the road I will be better for it. There was cause for concern from Madoff and Sardine that I would call that we just roll around in the wet grass, but that just isn’t how we do things at Peak, and plus I had just dried out from last week’s soaking.

After finishing YHC realized we still had some time and I had been dying to use the newly painted lines in the parking lot for the suicide work so we did, however without a good start and stop line, this turned into PAX confusion … blame it on the VQ.

2 All you Got sprints before moseying back to Launch for some Mary.

  • Rosalitas
  • American Hammers
  • Protractor


There wasn’t too much banter today, at least not much that I heard. Sensei did try to throw YHC off a time or two with counts, but YHC wasn’t too phased.

Sardine warned us about his upcoming Q and how he was going to rip our chests apart, too bad YHC will be on vacation then, but look forward to hearing about the massacre.

Thanks to Slim Fast on his brief but appreciated Q hijack during Jack Webbs.

Thank you all for the opportunity to lead and for continuing to put in the work and be out there every Thursday. It is certainly something that I look forward to doing each and every week!

Wet t-shirt day

13 beastly PAX decided to thumb their nose at #Cantore and show up to Matthews Elementary School to see whether or not the legend is true — that it doesn’t rain at Peak 51.

Time and time again, YHC has shown up to the parking lot, and at 5:29:59, the rain stops, and at 6:15:01, it starts back up. Of course, there is the problem of the rain going during a pre-run, or just in general stretching time before getting started, but, you can’t have it all.

There is a theory that Slim Fast has a special tribal dance that makes this happen … but anyway …

Disclaimer — it is a little drizzly, and we will be on wet surfaces, so be careful, but, in the end, you’re responsible for your own safety.

Mosey around the front of FBC Matthews to the parking lot behind.


  • Side-Straddle Hop x20 IC
  • Imperial Walker x20 IC
  • Windmill x20 IC
  • Low, Slow Squat x20 IC

Midway through COP, it was 5:33, and, the rain had just about stopped. I think the delay was because Slim did his rain dance shirtless.

Mosey to the bus lot behind MES.


Okay, we’re doing one of YHC’s favorite routines — The Beast. 6 reps of 6 exercises at 6 stations.

The stations:

  • Back right corner
  • In between the portable buildings
  • Basketball goal near Geraldo Tree
  • Other basketball goal
  • In between the big trees / track entry
  • The big ol’ oak tree in the back left corner

Once you’re finished, mosey back to the starting spot and regroup to get the next exercise.

  • Round 1: Carolina Dry Dock
  • Round 2: Mountain Climbers (1 rep = left, right)
  • Round 3: Squats
  • Round 4: Merkins
  • Round 5: Lunges (1 rep = left, right)
  • Round 6: Bomb Jacks

Well, after the bomb jacks, we needed a little rest, so let’s go over to the wall — and — weird, the rain kind of picked up again. Thankfully, we are under cover.

Anyway, PEOPLE’S CHAIR! Have a seat!

Air presses x50 civilian count

Recover. Shake it out. Back in the chair.

Air presses x100 civilian count

Rain … mostly stopped. Still a little misty.

Out to the curb, find a spot.

  • Dips x25
  • Derkins x25

Nomad said that 20 reps would have been better. So, round 2 …

  • Dips x20
  • Derkins x20

Round 3: Same thing, 15 reps. Round 4: Same thing, 10 reps.

Alright, line up on the curb and admire the freshly painted lines in the bus lot. Glad that CMS found the money to paint the lot but not repave it. Sigh. Anyway.

Short suicides. Mid-line and back, other side of the lot and back.

On the second one, well, let’s have a quick aside for a Bible lesson, shall we?

“… all the springs of the great deep burst forth, and the floodgates of the heavens were opened.”
-Genesis 6:11(B), NIV

Lesson over. Rain or no rain, we still have 5 minutes left. Well, let’s mosey back to launch.

As we round the corner, there were our friends from Sparta, hanging out at the art center. Under the cover. And only wet from running. Ahem.

Well, since we still have time, and we’re now all waterlogged, so, what does it matter if we’re on wet pavement.


  • LBCs x25 IC
  • Flutter x20 IC

It’s about 6:13. Mr. “It never rains at Peak” tried to pull a Q-jack and call time. Nope.

  • Rosalita x?? IC En Espanol. YHC only speaks American and a little bit of the Frenchie.

Okay, 6:14:30? Close enough.


  • Fast countin’
  • Fast namin’
  • Fast prayin’



It was raining. Hard. You can find stuff on Twitter and Slack.


The life of a Site Q … sometimes you have a potential Q vanish and you have to fill in. No matter, the wisest of us have favorites at the ready. The Beast is one of my go-tos.

I was reflecting on this on the ride home, especially as it relates to Slim Fast’s no rain hex.

I was first introduced to it during a downpour at a workout in Murrell’s Inlet last summer … led by our very own Mermaid, oddly enough.

I led The Beast at Base Camp once, but, it rained the night before, and I had to move it out to Strawberry because the track was flooded.

Now, today, I led it … and it was another morning of rain.

I think I see a pattern.

Now, Slim Fast claims the rain came because of lack of belief on the part of the PAX. But, my counterargument is — Slim is the only one who went the whole workout shirtless, so, was he preparing to get rained on?

Sardine I think was actually pumped up about a rainy workout. I think it gave him some extra energy to push through. For him and some of the crew, this was the first time that weather played into a workout, outside of “miserably hot and humid.”

Major #kotters to Booyah for his triumphant return. The best part was that he was able to pick up right where he left off with #mumblechatter. And speaking of #mumblechatter, among the high-level topics discussed:

  • The different meanings of “squat,” depending on the time of morning.
  • Does Sensei really read the newspaper, or does he just look at the pictures?
  • Sensitivity training.
  • Doing exercises to “own the libs.”
  • Does Texas have any rules?
  • A couple of lines from “Stripes” from Nomad and me, which is pretty normal at this point.
  • Do we think Benny wound up posting at Meathead?

Coming up next week: Bernie (who was powering through the dips/derkins this morning like a boss) is stepping up next week for his VQ. Compliance will follow suit next week, and Sardine a couple of weeks after that. I’m very excited for the newer guys to be taking the next step here in the wild world of F3.

Even though I was a substiQ this morning, it’s somewhat providential, as this past Sunday marked 2 years since I hobbled into Mountain Goat for my first-ever workout. Also filed under “providential” is that Booyah returned today, as he kept me company during that first-ever workout, and, well, whether he knows it or not, assuaged my biggest fear about showing up (well, aside from being radically out of shape), and that fear was that the “no man left behind” mantra was just clever marketing. Turns out, it is real, and, turns out, I stuck with this F3 business. I also discovered that there is a second part to that mantra — yes, there is “no man left behind,” but also, “we don’t leave you where we found you.” And a lot of the guys around today have been a part of it. I can’t thank y’all enough, and know that it’s an honor to lead the best dang workout in Area 51.

Alright, enough sentiment. Time to go dry off.

I go by the name of Lois Lane

Actually, that subject line is true, at least as it pertains to the world of F3. Anyway, 7 descended upon the venerable Scout Hut at Matthews United Methodist Church for this week’s edition of Gumby.

It’s been a while since YHC Q’d at Gumby, so, out came the special Gumby t-shirt and a special playlist — the shortest in the history of Gumby in terms of number of songs: 5.

More on that later. Let’s actually get down to it.

*hit play*


No specific Bible verse this week, but, YHC took an excerpt from a John MacArthur study guide on a study of the life of Solomon (1 Kings, Proverbs and Ecclesiastes) for this week’s devo. In short — much like a pro athlete has to devote himself or herself to constant practice, so must we have the devotion to seek wisdom.

Asking for wisdom, as Solomon did, is the start, but, we must be anchored in the source of wisdom — the Word of God — and actively remain there.


Corpse pose — stretch out, arms up, move feet and hands.

Knees up, windshield wipers.

Knees up, bridge. Try and bind your hands underneath your hips.

Move to Table Top


Bird dog — left arm out, right leg back, flapjack

Odell Beckham, moving legs out to fire hydrant, then rotating knees in a circle clockwise, then counterclockwise. Flapjack.

Child’s pose — arms out, to the right, back to center, to the left, back to center.

Sit up, sit back on the balls of your feet for a plantar stretch.

1 Sun Salutation — Stretch up, forward fold, halfway lift, forward fold, plank, Chattanooga, up dog, down dog, halfway lift, forward fold, stretch ip.

Grab a strap/rope

On your back, wrap the strap around your right foot and bring leg straight up, holding it (replicating the partner stretch from Brew’s Q last week). Hold for approximately 1 minute.


Leg back up, then out to the side. Hold for approximately 1 minute.

Relax. Flapjack.

On your feet, 1 Sun Salutation OYO

Move into Chair. Arms up, then out. Lean forward with right arm extended in front and left leg behind in Dancer. Back to chair, arms out, then up.

1 SS OYO, then repeato with dancer on the other side.


Move into Tree. Right foot up, then left foot up.


Kick back right foot into Warrior 1, then Warrior 2, then Peaceful Warrior, back to Warrior 2.

Turn and face the wall, into Star, lower down to the mat, stretch in the middle, then right, the left.

Back into Star, then Warrior 2, Warrior 1, then a SS OYO.

Repeato/Flapjack, this time with Star, go down, do a pair of triangle stretches, leaving the left hand on the mat and rotating up with the right hand, then flapjacking.

While we’re down here, let’s get in one of YHC’s favorite stretches, the Ninja. Rotate the right foot up, then sit back on the left foot. Flapjack, the come up into star, and finish out the Warrior set.


Grab the strap, back on your back. Round two of strapped leg stretching, this time holding for 45 seconds and only doing the leg straight back. Pay attention to how the stretch (and your capability to do it) changes after being active.

Flip over into Down Dog, right leg back, swing through for Pigeon. Suffer a bit, unwind, back to Down Dog, then flapjack/repeato.

Down dog. Corpse. Revisit devo.

*music ends*

15 seconds of silence, then, the timer goes off. That’s a wrap.



F3 Dads, Saturdays at 9AM at Col. Francis Beatty park, on the softball fields.


As usual, I had my overly complicated setup going — I had my iPad running the music, and a timer, since the Scout Hut clock is behind the Q in the typical Gumby setup. I read the devo from my phone.

I was also running the music through my M’s nice DOSS Box speaker — this did not go unnoticed by Arena, who openly pined for the days where I would bring in my keychain speaker (which famously has no low end) which usually hangs in my bathroom. And given what Arena called said speaker, “hang” is incredibly appropriate here.

So, here are the five songs:

  • Pink Floyd – “Comfortably Numb”
  • The Allman Brothers Band – “Jessica”
  • Lynyrd Skynyrd – “Free Bird”
  • Derek and the Dominos – “Layla”
  • Sugarhill Gang – “Rapper’s Delight”

As you can tell, the songs were selected for length and/or the existence of a famous coda. The playlist clocked in at just under 45 minutes.

Given the move from classic rock to old-school hip-hop, the overall length of “Rapper’s Delight” I think was noticed more than the others. But, I knew when I started the endeavor that I wanted it in there. If I’m in a mood, and prompted, I can pull off the entire 14-minute rap with no cheats. It’s on my special skills resume.

There were also a few laughs because my voice is still in recovery after a concert in Greensboro on Sunday night. Well, lots of in-car conversation driving to and from Greensboro with friends, then a lot of off-key accompaniment at the show. Given that Gumby does require the most guidance of any F3 workout, I knew it would be rough. It gave me a few flashbacks to middle school, for sure.

As far as the workout itself goes — I tried to liven things up with the shout-out to Strange Brew’s mobility stuff from last week. Hope it was well received.

T-claps to Arena and Grave Dancer for pre-running. I would have joined in, except, well, I was feeling lazy and just didn’t want to do it. #BRRReady(?)

As always, it’s fun to Q Gumby– praise be to Swiss Miss and Tweetsie (currently sipping Mimosas at The Cove on some sort of “work retreat”) for the opportunity to lead and for their continued leadership of such a great (and essential) site.

Alright, signing off, as my hands are now comfortably numb after all of that typing.