Author Archive Hammer

Merkins, Heels to Heaven, and Pussy Willows

There were about 20ish men that posted in the drizzle.  Short disclaimer modified by Gumby (I know its Gummy) and we are off.

We ran over here and did a bunch of mermaids. O T W

We ran over there and did a bunch of mermaids, Heels to Heaven,  and Lunges. R I H

Loped over to the Hot Box did a bunch of squats. A G I

Ran back and forth and did some more mermaids, and heels to heaven. N E T

Ran hither and yonder and did some Mary. G R E

Then native American ran back to the launch point. E S

Big group today.  Spackler was in the mix, so I knew I would have a good name for the workout.  As usual he came through.  Not only did he provide the official name, and the entertainment through out, but he was moving today on the hither and yonders.  I am also pretty sure he lapped me on the Native American Runs.  Lorax and Snuka were leading the pack on the back and forths.  It was everything me Puddin could do to keep up.  So, speaking of Puddin, he was providing all the motivations everyone needed to finish the heels to heaven and get right out to the back and forths.    He gets props for the linger, it was touch and go as to whether or not we would have an official code brown.  Briiiiileaux and Icky Shuffle dominated on the lunges.  I think Icky was upset about the workout….probably something Spackler said.  You guys hug it out.   As usual Mermaid was doubling everyone on the Merkins, we need to officially change the name of Merkins to Mermaids….I have the mike, you guys have to listen to every word I say, from this day forth, at site of Anvil, Merkins shall be no more, Mermaids will officially be added to the lexicon for push ups …Done.  It was an honor to lead, thank you for the push.

FNG attended- he is a uuuuge 90210 fan, welcome Peach Pit.

If we need Q’s and you are on the list, expect to get the call….

I found a quick documentary on Dabo Sweeney as a middle schooler.  Looks like it was his first encounter with a wolf.   Check it out pretty cool….Go Tigers.





So what happened was :   Goonie finally decided to join us again.


For warm up we started with a short jog and 21s .   I was sure we would mess that up and it would lead to a pain station, but  I was as wrong as Notre Dame trying to win in Death Valley .

The crew then slow moseyed down to the track.  Knowing that this was a moderate work out and that Burpee’s are frowned upon we took a lap around the track stopping at each corner to not do Burpee’s.  First corner  Merkens,  second corner Spartan Burpee’s,third corner  slow squats, and fourth corner jump squats.  Geraldo and Simba lead the pack and concurred that we did not do Burpee’s.   After Goonie’s long lay out, he was all the way in the back.  Nobody was racing, but everybody noticed Goonie leading from the back.

Another slow mosey down to the ballfields where we began a Cindy.   5 pull-ups, 10 push-ups, 15 air squats all in one minute rinse repeat times 20.  By #13  Mall Cop and I are beginning to feel the quads and would have gotten the prescribed 20 in, but I got Q Jacked by Smash and Wolfman and moved to a different location.  To be clear, Mall Cop, Sardine, and Marvel, as well as myself, all could’ve easily done the prescribed 20, if not for the Q jacking.

Another slow mosey to the top of the stairs where we partnered up and  got a lifting rocks.  It’s time for some curls for the girls.  Partner one short lap down to the ballfields partner two. Curls, flap jack, rinse repeat x 3.   More of the same to follow -tricep extensions for partner one, partner 2 make fast lap down to the ballfields rinse repeat x 3


We ran 15 miles; did 500 push ups, squats, and pull-ups; 300 burpees, and 10k curls.  Not bad for a moderate work 0ut.

Great to see some old faces again Heartbreaker and Goonie glad to see you guys are back out looking for you to get back in the form.  Better to see some new faces Damn Gina, keep up the work, it pays off! Simba and Geraldo moving fast the entire work out.  Simba was doubled over  most of the last circuit.  Awesome job pushing yourself.   Geraldo always looks like he’s going slow, but  he’s always at front can’t figure it out….Insomniac Thunder Rd., Wolfman,  Little Mike all we’re getting a good workout in-I know because they were all quiet, almost no mumble chatter., until the end.   Little Mike finished our session with the short sermon about encouraging those around you and Simba prayed us out.  Great way to start the day and the week.  Thank you guys for coming out pushing me!!!


Old School Rock Beat Down

What had happened was:

Alf called needed someone to step in. So I, being the perfect F3 Brother, stepped up even though I was hamstrung by an unbelievable set of unrelated insurmountable coincidences that made it impossible to attend work outs for about 2 months and gained some weight. I was sick through half of December, then it got real cold, not to mention there an incredible batch parties and dinners from Thanksgiving through New Years.  All in all,  I put on 25 lbs (as Run Stopper agreed it was awesome)…and as you can see there was really no way around any of the aforementioned circumstances.  When I showed up Saturday morning and it 20 degrees only the most committed (fastest) brothers showed up to work out.  Being slightly out of shape, slightly over weight, extremely competitive, and surrounded by the most dedicated, most athletic, most intense specimens F3 has produced in at least the last 5 years I needed away to even the playing field.  We decided as a group that anyone who beat the Q must do burpies until the Q caught up.  As a result, everyone was in an equal amount of pain.  With the rules clearly established, we began:

Warm up run to the front parking lot.

Pain Station 1 – Front Parking Lot

Partner up:

Ladder work

Partner #1

Sprint to the first island do 1 push up

Partner #2


Flapjack until all islands have been hit twice- ascending and descending

Pain Station 2 Soccer Field

4 corners x 2

First lap done together via native american run

corner 1 – 20 push ups

corner 2 – 20 Spartan burpies

corner 3 – 20 Jump Squats

Corner 4 – Dreamweaver….

Second lap – Race time.  We needed to find out who the best was.  Same as above, but only thing that counts is speed.  Rachel killed us and ended up getting about 20 Burpies while he waited on the back of the bus to show up.  That was awesome.  Hoover, who like myself, does not excel at the flight response, came in last and audibled at the end.  We were both pretty sure everyone else cheated. What is especially demoralizing is the fact that Hoover was wearing a weight vest, it wasn’t as heavy as my 25 extree, but it is a start, and he still beat me.  Great job everyone.

Pain Station 3

First Set x 2

Partner Up

First Partner tricep work out

Second Partner run to the light posts and trees in ascending and descending order

Flap Jack

Second Set x 3

First Partner Leg Work out

Second Partner Run to the Play Ground do 5-10ish pull ups sprint back

Flap Jack

Native American to the hill, Cleveland style (I think Gumby(I know its Gummy, but this has been our thing for the last few years) shouted that out).

Pain Station 4

Partner Up Boerewors wanted to keep the same partners, but was over ruled

Partner 1 up the hill and make the loop

Partner 2 active rest

Flap Jack x 3

Pain Station 5

We only got 5 mins left so we all had to go into Rachel (fast)  mode or cheat, all but Rachel cheated me included….

Run to the Front Yard

4 corners

1st corner – 20 push ups

back to center

2nd corner

Spartan Burpies

3rd Corner

jump squats

4th corner home base

All in all –  we did great as a team:

  1. Started a little early
  2. Marge quit early, he couldn’t take the pain, but that ok he’s from Clemson so he gets a pass
  3. We ran 13 miles
  4. Burned through 5400 calories
  5. Did 1100 push ups
  6. 500 pull ups
  7. 200 Burpies
  8. Maintained 35 mins of peak heart rate
  9. Maintained 24 mins  of Cardio
  10. Maintained 1 min of fat burt
  11. Finished a little late.

Maybe that just how it felt to me.

You guys all did incredible and have officially motivated me to get back in the game.  I got a solid read watching everyone from the back and Hoover, Run Stopper, and Boerewors, and Big League Chew, and I, and maybe Gummy are all gifted in the fight response (we don’t run that fast), we make up for in brute strength and awkwardness.  Rachel and Marge went fast the entire time.  As hard as I thought I was pushing them, they seamed like they breezed through the work out.  Again great work!!!!



Clemson Still Undefeated and ranked #3

No pre blast was sent out didn’t want to give up any game tape.  The rest of the crew showed and we were off to do the Harris Teeter Mile, finishing at Howard’s Rock Pile.

Everyone who finished ahead of the Q was supposed to do Burpies until I Got there.  3 beat me in, Kirk waited on me, but no burpies,  Swiper already is Q jacking the work out.

Plan B has blown out ACL and is was bringing in the 6 so we did some plank work while we waited.

Everyone went down the Hill, grabbed a lifting rock, and a partner and we begin

Partner 1 run to the Drop Box, Partner 2 start doing curls.  Flap jack and rinse and repeat until the group reaches 200 total curls

Same as above, but this time instead of curls push presses

Repeato with Triceps extensions, squats, American Hammer, High Low Push Merkins,, and finish with some Merry.

Run back to the cars. Swipper Q jacked again with some extra exercises , but we stopped him on the 3 and beat Louisville by 6

We all rushed the field, and One I finished us up with a prayer on the 50

Never think of pain or danger or enemies a moment longer than is necessary to fight them.  For the Atlas Shrugged fans.

Clemson has Boston College next up queue the video.


Hammer Time

Indian Run to the hill for some BRR 2017 training.  Clemson and South Carolina lead 2 lines of tigers down to the hill.  Nobody was racing, but Clemson won.

  1. Partner up – partner 1 air squats partner 2 run up the hill and back, rinse and repeat until we get to 200 air squats
  2. 2nd Cycle more of the same but the new target is 200 lunges.


Everyone had partner, but the Hammer…..Indian run back Dumpster Fire took the lead and took us to the Howard’s Rock Pile for some sun’s out gun’s out work.

  1. Partner up – Partner 1 curls partner 2 run the loop.  Rinse and Repeat until you get to 150 curls
  2. Cycle 2 – more of the same, but push presses
  3. Cycle 3 – repeato, but triceps extensions
  4. Cycle 4 – hold the plank until 4 total loops have been run.

Steinbrenner promptly pointed out that the guys finishing early were an impossibility, I think Thunder Road said that because it’s dark, nobody could see them modify….

Still didn’t have a partner noticed there was a group of 3 this time….Starting to see a trend….Adobe rolled in for the last cycle…he did created another group of 3….definitely on purpose…someone kept saying that we should punish the group for Adobe’s lateness, so we did.  We had 4 min. left down to the track.

Run 100 yards do 5 Burpies rinse and repeat for 400 yards.  Sprint up to the parking lot for some name o rama and announcements.  Beaker and Hearth breaker were sprinting the entire time and having a conversation at the same time… not only were they killing us, but they didn’t even realize they were getting it.  I think they were talking about Clemson smashing Louisville, couldn’t be sure.


  1. Ragnoruck is this weekend
  2. BRR training 2017 Fireman Ed and Torpedo are looking for another for their team.
  3. Southern Discomfort is making some stops between here and there
  4.   Shout out to F3 Ft Mill.  Ran into a 6 guys volunteering for a fund raiser for the Children’s Attn Home in Rockhill.  They also go down and volunteer weekly.
  5. Goonie is taking applications for Notre Dame head coach, he shows up angry every Monday.  Video is of Notre Dame showing up at Death Valley for the first time, they actually couldn’t make it through the noise and were getting pushed back into the locker room.
  6. Dumpster Fire was moving fast and working hard, great work!!! He was able to do some research for us on what happens if to Gamecocks get divorced.  Ask him he will say its a West Virginia thing, but deep down he knows its a Columbia, SC
  7. You can’t spell Burpie, with Beaker…..
  8.   We got 2.8 miles in.
  9. Pray for the city and our leaders.

Great work everyone.  Honored to lead today.


Talking Trash

7 men showed up in the gloom

We began with a run to warm up, and on the way saw Hoover and the Heavies, pumping some iron.

We ended up at the the front parking lot and began with some partner work.  It was here that i was matched with Dumpster Fire.  He immediately started talking trash about Clemson, so I liked him right away. 

Partner 1 – run suicide to the first island

Partner 2 – push …. merkins

Flapjack with ever increasing island suicides

Continue until 100 push….Merkins are completed by the pair.

Next same format as above, but instead of push…Merkns we are doing Mountain Climbers to 200

Last same format as above, but instead of Mountain Climbers Burpies to 50.

On to the next Pain Station. a focus on Legs,  at the Picnic Tables, and more partner work.

This time i got Boerewors (pronounced buda force) and Dingo.  Hard to break into their group the wanted to talk Rugby.  Sport that involves cauliflowered ears i like.  

Partner 1 Squats

Partner 2 run to the 2nd island and back

Flapjack and continue until 200 Squats have been enjoyed.

Same format as before, but with 50 one legged squats per leg.

Gumby (pronounced Gummy) and Dumpster Fire pretty much dominated.

On to the next Pain Station and the Rock Pile also known as Suns out Gun’s out.   Out of the Gloom Dear Abby Rolled up.  He heard that Gumby might be trying to start some riots at the church and wanted to be the first to get the scoop.  

Grab a lifting rock and new partner I got paired with the Dingo again

Partner 1 Curls

Partner 2 Run to B3 and back

Flapjack and repeato until you have both reached 100

Next cycle push presses

Next cycle tricep extensions

On the last cycle, Boerewors reminded me that he was faster and tougher than me and as i began to pass him, I heard a hell no and he took off. Leader of this group were Gumby and Dear Abby.  The smoked the rest of us.

Last Pain Station and some Dream Weaver.  BRR training 2017

Indian Run to across the field, tag the fence and 25 push ups

Indian Run to the next corner, 25 Sparten Burpies

Indian Run behind the dug out 25 jump squats

Finish up with some Dream Weaver hill sprints.

Somewhere along the line Dear Abby bailed out.  I don’t think we were moving fast enough, and Gumby would couldn’t start a riot, he did skip out on some burpies though.

Indian Run back to the cars where Gumby stepped up and ran us through some Mary.

Great group! everyone pushed themselves really hard.  Not a lot of mumble chatter, so i think we had the appropriate amount of pain.  We got close to 4 miles in on campus that pretty awesome.  Video is of Spurrier while head football coach for the Game Chickens, showing everyone how not to do push ups, I hope…..


Dream Weaver

Today’s Title is courtesy of Blades

I’ve just closed my eyes again
Climbed aboard the dream weaver PAIN train
Hammer take away my worries of today
And leave Gumby behind
Ooh dream weaver
I believe you can help  Deep Dish through the hill sprints
Ooh dream weaver
I believe Jamboree can reach the Safe Light

We begin with a warm up jog to to a core work out  and suicide duo.

Partner up for:

  1. Partner 1 X’s & O’s Partner 2 suicide sprint to the island. Switch rinse and repeat until a total of 50 X’s and O’s are achieved
  2. Partner 1 LBC’s, Partner 2 suicide sprints.  Switch rinse and repeat until a total 100 LBCs are achieved
  3. Partner ! Flutters Partner 2 suicide sprints. Switch rinse and repeat until a total of 150 flutters are achieved
  4. Partner 1 Heels to Heaven Partner 2 Suicide . Switch rinse and repeat until a total 100 are achieved.

Gumby, Jamboree, and Blades were really pushing the pace on these.

Mosey to the soccer fields for exercises that aren’t Bur-pies

  1. Indian Run to the far side of the field.  20 pus…merkins
  2. Indian Run to the next corner. Spartan Burp…Hip thrusts x20
  3. Indian Run to the next Corner for squat jumps x20
  4. finish with 20 hill sprints for the weaving your way back to our starting corner.  This was for all the BRR guys.

The next round was a race, at which point Sledge took off and left the old guys in the dust, HATE.. Blades was with Sledge until the hill sprints at which time he started singing dream weaver, lost count and did 25 hill sprints instead of 20….and the title of our work out was born.

Mosey to the picnic table and partner up

Partner 1 one legged squats and Partner 2 sprint to the light post, switch and repeato until 50 squats have been achieved with each leg.

switch partners and Partner 1 one legged squats front style while Partner 2 sprints to the light.  Switch and repeato until each leg has received 25 squats.

Sledge decided to embarrass us by running to the furthest light post and still coming in first on the sprints.

Running out of time…so quick time to the rocks, for some Sun’s Out Guns Out.

Partner up for Partner 1 curls Partner 2 sprint to the light post.  Rinse and repeat until a total of 100 curls is achieved.

Boerewors and Safe Light hadn’t done enough sprints and were leaving everyone in the sprints on this one.

1 minute left for jail break to the cars.

Great work out everyone. .  Everyone is getting faster and pushing each other!!! Hopper back from IR I think for the first time congrats!!  Rock wall hopefully got completed for the F3 work date.   Have an awesome week!




So what had happened was…..I got motivated to start working out again.

Long Slow Loop to rocks aka the good call

Warm up aka had a bunch more but wanted to get to the Rocks

Jumping jack x 15 and Low slow Squats x15

Partner ROCKs aka I can’t feel my hands….

Partner 1 : Curls  Partner 2: sprint to the light

Rinse and Repeat x3

Pass the rock to the right….

P1: Push press P2: Sprint to the  light x3

RandR x 3

Pass the rock to the right…

P1: Tri Ext. P2: sprint to the light

RandR x3

Partner Hills aka It’s in the Bone…see the video

P1: Plank and P2:  backward hill sprint


P1:Praying position and P2 hill sprint

RandR x3

Partner Picnic Tables aka Dad are we there yet

P1:Incline and P2: to the light


P1: Decline P2:  to the light

RandR x3

P1: Dips and P2: to the light


The field #?  aka As many as needed to finish = 1

Indian Run to corner 20 squat jumps

IR to corner 20 push ups

IR to corner The Worm = Hill work

Finish with partner push ups x10 each

Finish aka the stretch

Downward dog


Stretch back

Stretch the hammies

Mileage 3.94 ceeeemmmmoooone!!!!!!

Great work out today! I take 2-3 months off and everybody is faster than me, RENT IS DUE…Hopefully if work out was performed correctly, you should have sore upper body, arms and legs.  Lungs should still be feeling good as well.   I had more backwards hill sprints planned, but the video pretty much sums up how my thighs felt so we moved on.

For all of you that may need motivation to keep working hard,  Rhapsody is your motivation.  Over Christmas he took on the Pleurisy and the Pleurisy lost.  He beat it with open chest surgery, to suck and scrap the goozal out of his chest and lungs.  Ask to see the scars…and 6 weeks later he back at it and leading the pack.

Stone Cold thank you for showing the 30 somethings that us older guys still got it.  Clarkage thank you for picking the biggest, muddiest and coldest rock to start the real work outs with.  Boerewors you have obviously been hitting it hard I can’t keep up.  E-trade, Orange Web, Rhapsody, and Clarkage were battling for first the whole time.

Everyone has gotten faster, I got to lead from the rear.   You all have gotten so fast, that the Indian Run on the last pain station was an audible (needed to keep the group together). and you guys followed me on the Worm, ( I needed to finish first on something).  Thank you for the opportunity lead and for giving me the motivation to start PAYING RENT AGAIN!!!!

Disclaimer if we are at The ROCK, and I am the “Q”

  1. We will be pushing ROCKs, cold hands and mumble chatter be damned!!!! GET SOME!!
  2. We will not be doing Mary at the end, we will stretch.  If enough push ups, planks, southern gentleman, partner push ups, etc..are done we will get plenty of core.
  3. The Stone Mountain Challenge will be given at the back blast.  There haven’t been any takers yet, but It consists of:
    • 6:45  am meet at the Calvary and 7 am on the road.
    • Caravan to Stone Mountain NC, not GA . 1 hour and 45 mins away
    • Run to the top of the dome 1 mile straight up.
    • 30 min boot camp
    • Run  to the top of the waterfall slow down hill
    • 200 steps straight down to the bottom of the waterfall
    • Run next to crystal clear creak in the Mountain Laurel and low lands to the Homestead.
    • 30 min pain station at the Homestead.
    • Jog back to the parking lot.
    • Back to the Charlotte
    • 5 miles and 2 hours incredible views and pain.
    • 1 hour and 45 mins back.
    • Great way to spend he morning.
  4. Any references to the work out being called “Hammer Time” or shout outs “Hammer don’t hurt ’em.”, are encouraged and will be rewarded with Gumby or Hopper doing the Typewriter or running man between sets
  5. At the end am only half conscious so if I get the names wrong…apologies.

In Your Guard,







So Sore….

The thang…

7 am 7 pax and 1 FNG showed up for with tickets on the pain train….

We started with a warm up jog to back parking lot, did some warm up exercises and a quick stretch.

From there we headed over to the rock pile, partnered up, and grabbed a rock.  it full on night time for the beginning of the work out.  not used to that on Sat.  We decided to stay on the on the pavement and avoid holes, so…..

  1. Partner 1 ran 100 yards to light post and back partner 2 did curls while waiting on partner 1 to get back.  x 3 sets When finished fast groups had an active rest holding the plank, when the 6 came in we finished with 15 mountain climbers in cadence.  We then passed our rock down  to the next group and….we were feeling out of balance and couldn’t finish strong until each group had tried each Rock for a cycle…
  2. Same light post to sprint 2 for partner 1, partner 2 did push presses x 3 sets.  Again as the groups finished everyone held the plank for the 6, and with the return of the 6 15 Peter Parkers in cadence…exercise.  Upon finishing pass your rock to the next group….
  3. With a pattern fully developed, we continued on but with triceps extensions and sprints x 3 sets.  Finished with 15 Parker Peters, exercise….pass the rock…
  4. Rock squats and sprints, finished with planks and push ups….and return the rocks to the rock pile.

Everyone lined up and did an Indian run to the soccer field for some Hammer Time.  Each Set includes

  1. 20 dips at the pavilion
  2. Run to the fence
  3. 20 push ups
  4. Run to the backstop
  5. 20 air squats
  6. Finish with 10 hill sprints

We all did the first set staying together and doing and indian run between pain stations.  After which it was a full on race.  Harley and Cable Guy battled back and forth for the lead, with Harley eventually pulling it out in end.  After 3 cycles it was 8 am and time Mosey back.


Harley finished us with a prayer that was so inspiring he officially was designated The Rock’s Chaplain, and has prayer duties from hear on out.

Dead Lift finally got his neighbor to come out and when it was found out he was a fellow Clemson Tiger, i promptly named him after one of my favorite places at Clemson Bowman Field.

Great work everyone, and so sore…….


Welcome Back Billy Goats

So, what had happened was…..

I’m not a professional so we got started right away…no warm up

Run to, I’m sorry, Mosey to baseball field, partner up, and Grab a rock.

  1.  Partner 1 run to the fence Partner 2 do curls Rinse and repeat x 3
  2. Partner 1 run to fence Partner 2 do push presses Rinse and repeat x 3
  3. Partner 1… triceps extensions  Rinse and repeat x 3

Mosey to parking lot form the line on the light for multi form suicides

  1. bear crawl to the opposing light pole and sprint back
  2. broad jump….
  3. karaoke right…
  4. karaoke left…
  5. run backwards….

Mosey to North Face

Partner up.

Partner 1 hold the plank, Partner 2 run the North Face Loop Rinse and Repeat x 3

Mosey to the front lawn

Partner up, partner 1 does exercises until partner 2 gets back.

  1. Station 1 push ups
  2. Station 2 jump Squats
  3. Station 3 sprawl

Just to be clear, when you put all those exercises together you don’t do a burpy, because those are frowned upon.  You are just getting a good work out.  We were going to do 2 more pain stations, but we needed and deserved to finish with my signature work out the PAIN TRAIN…..mosey to the soccer fields

PAIN TRAIN 2 loops if you beat Hopper you get a free coffee, surprise Hopper….

  1. pavilion 20 dips,
  2. run to fence 20 push ups
  3. run to backstop 20 air squats
  4. run to hill 5 hill sprints

Finished with some Mary led by ABBA

Great work out.  The Rock is getting faster, all the Billy Goats were in top form and dusted the regular guys, Good Work.  Not a lot of mumble chatter, so work out was deemed to be appropriate.  Fenway won the Pain Station Challenge.

Thinking about putting out a Stone Mountain Challenge.

  1.  1.5 hrs away 5 miles in the mountains, waterfalls, big views, and pain stations.


  1.  first mile almost straight up, at the top incredible views and 15-30 min pain station,


  1.   2 miles of slow decent followed by 300 steps down  to 200 foot water fall pain station 15-30 mins,


  1.  2 miles through thick forest, mountain Laurels, and crystal clear creek, to the Homestead for our last pain station 15-30 mins.  Mosey back to the cars.


Any interest?