Chico Claims F3 Rigged Against Him as Fat, Slow Person

Chico Claims F3 Rigged Against Him as Fat, Slow Person

This Workout Was Huge, Big League

Went a bit old school with a themed Weinke. We did a lot of that sort of thing 3-4 years ago, as some of you may remember. Since I spend more time at the OPE baseball fields than I do anywhere else on the planet, I decided to climb the ladder of South Charlotte baseball levels. Ran from field to field (tee ball, rookie machine pitch, machine pitch, minors and majors) with the exercises getting tougher at each level. First we would “run” the base paths of each field in some painful manner (backwards run (x2), lunge walk, crab walk, bear crawl, burpee broad jump (crowd pleaser/Q killer), then would do some variant of merkins at the right field corner (x10), left field corner (x10) and home plate (x20) of each field. Again, getting more difficult as we progressed up the baseball ladder (CDDs, merkins, stagger left and right, wide arms, diamonds). 40 diamonds after burpee broad jumping the bases is no joke. Stopped for some core on the pavement (so as not to soil the fancy garments of delicate pax with infield dirt) in between fields (25 LBCs, 15 heels to heaven (x2), 15 dolly IC, 15 flutter IC). Threw in a Gummy 10 Count (random IW x10) and a Smoked Q (random SSH X10) somewhere along the way.

Had some time left so headed to football field for Broken Arrow, which is a sprint of the football field followed by an exercise. Usually 100 yard sprints, but increased to 120 today at someone’s (Spackler’s?) urging. 25 WWII sit-ups, 20 merkins, 15 heels to heaven, 15 jump squats, 10 stagger left, 10 stagger right, 15 more jump squats. Run home and finish with 15 more heels to heaven and 10 more diamonds.

All in all, 2.6 miles, 250 merkins of various varieties, a reasonable amount of core, some painful base running and however many burpees it takes to go around a baseball diamond.

My Microphone Wasn’t Working

Multiple refuseniks on the base paths today. I think perhaps there was a shoulder injury involved in one case, but I did hear some complaints about dirt. Seriously. I hope having one’s hands and feet touch dirt was not too much to ask. About 5 days a week my 9 year old is out there sliding and diving in said dirt. He seems relatively unoffended by the whole concept.

The Moderators Keep Attacking Me

Actually had complaints today about dirt, grass AND pavement. Unless we learn to do our workouts while levitating, there aren’t many other options. Perhaps next time I will cover the entire AO with fluffy animal hides or fine Persian rugs. If you have a fear of dirt, grass clippings or pavement I would suggest taking this whole boot camp thing inside. Oh wait, they have that. It’s called Crossfit. I hear it’s a great place to meet girls.

None of You are Hot Enough for Me to Harass

I’ll quit my bitching about all the bitching (though I think I forgot to mention that it started with complaints that I didn’t do a disclaimer). And I can’t really call out anybody specifically because it was too dark outside and because I was too busy trying to bear crawl and burpee broad jump the bases to see who was missing. Also, to be fair, as a general proposition, the Hydra pax crushed yet another difficult workout. Certainly moreso than I did. I was flying out front in the beginning … not so much in the end.

There is something called Southern Discomfort that is apparently happening (check website and twitter). Thanks once again to Puddin’ Pop and Good Hands for the keys. I can’t remember who took us out (Harley?), but thanks for that too.