Author Archive Kirby

Impact Local 2021

What is Faith?

Faith is complete trust or confidence in someone or something.  In this case my faith was in the generosity of the fine men of F3 and the amazing women of FIA and it was rewarded in spades. When I was asked to put this race back on for the second time I was not sure how it would go but I was sure I would need help. Faith was rewarded again with a group of high impact men to help plan and execute the race. A board was assembled and the date was set the rest we left up to faith.

We had several marginally led planning sessions led by YHC. Luckily I was surrounded by a great team. Hoover, Franky, Cheese Curd, Soft Pretzel, Strawberry, Fuse Box and Bratwurst were instrumental in the success of the race. With out these intrepid men the event would not be anywhere near what it turned out to be. A massive thanks to them for giving up there time and energy to make the race amazing.

We were blessed to have amazing sponsors step up and help us as well. Olaf and his team at Charlotte Vitamin and Health were the main sponsor and donated not just money but amazing race fuel and recovery items for us. Kelly with Intuite Technologies and Focker with Stat Floor Cleaning sponsored as well. We also had a race team Up N Over get in on the action as well.

We had several donations to the event that deserve a special thanks. Soft Pretzel, Fraiser, and Strawberry donated the refreshments and food at the event. We also had some special beverages donated by Hoover for the adults as well.

Selfless volunteers stepped up as well to support the race. Strange Brew, Midriff, The Worm, Patent Pending Wild Turkey and so many others that helped to make things happen before during and after the race from set up, guiding and cheering racers to the clean up. We thank you!

The Results!

YOU helped raise over $6000 that is going to go a long way to helping others out. The majority of it will impact three charities that are right here in the area. There are so many great and wonderful charities out there but here are the ones we picked to to make an impact.

Mel’s Diner

Congregation for Kids


Christs Closet


PS. If you did not get your shirt please contact my self or Cheese Curd and we will make arrangements to get it to you.

Thank you again


Your Extremely Humble Correspondent,


Not good at mathematics

Yhc gave poor instructions and can’t do math. After much grumbling by the some of the pax I have enrolled myself back in 3rd grade to revist my multiplication tables.

The Thang:

Mosey to Target parking lot.

20 ssh Canadian

20 IWs

20 Hand Release merkins

Mosey to church parking lot.

Give directions and then have a audit performed on my instructions.  So we did a lot of merkins squats and bog boy sit ups. Clearly to many to count effectively. #shouldhavehadanacountant.

Mosey to elm. Do 2 jump squats at each little light on the right.

Let the FNG (Cherri Berry) decide hill or more merkins.  He wisely chose hill. Flag carrier run down then some sort of loose running up.


Great job everyone for putting up with my ridiculous Q. There was a lot of tired customers at the end though and we managed to get 2 miles in. Olaf as always had a strong showing. Ralph has really gotten after it and it shows. Rousey looked great after coming of injury. Trickle still loves his merkins. Big Tuna crushed the Muderhorn. Cold cuts did like 8000 squats. Fng Cherri Berry looked like an old pro. Picaso was all over the map but managed to find his way up the murderhorn.

I will take my Q tweak it and be back with it. Maybe MT and Strange Brew will be there too🤔

Uphill battle 10/43

Madam too so had to switch out his Q due to his travel plans or getting his nails done or something like that. YHC volunteered to fill his giant size 7 shoes and give the pax a worth beating.

Thee Thang

Mosey to the Y. First stop on the tour. This is where people pay money to work out.

15 ssh

15 Canadian ssh

15low very slow squats

15 hand release merkins

10 RDLs

Mosey to bagpipe Hill. 10 squats at the top cross the bridge and do 10 hand release merkins

Mosey to pond where the pirate ships dock. Dips 20 hold 10 hold 5 hold.

Mosey to gazebo do it again.

Mosey to bull ring 10 each leg lunges.

Flag carrier run I mean Indian run towards ESPN.  This is where the create fake sporting events.  10 hand release merkins.

Mosey to Ben Nevis hill. Go halfway up and do 10 big boy situps facing down hill and repeat facing uphill.  Ascend to top.

More dip work at the bottom guard rail. Run back to launch.  4 miles.

Moley skin

This was a group of men that pushed themselves hard today.  Mark Kay gave it his all and said he thought this was a nightmare.  Wildturkey pulled up to the launch with his Ruck #beast. I am pretty sure he was drinking 4Loco before he got out of his car. Spare parts destroyed the Ben Nevis hill nice work out there. Frankie has really gotten strong and was making short work of the hills. Nice job. Billy goat put down the miles with ease.

Thanks for letting me be a small part of your day.



July 4th kids work out. Look for info on slack.


The wind beneath my grundle 7/43

What can I say when there are those who beg for the parking deck because it is cold we go the opposite way.

The Thang:

Mosey about 1 mile to St. Matthew’s parking lot pick up heavy rocks. With one light one.

Warm up 15ish Canadian SSH eh?

15 low slow squats

20 Moroccan night clubs


Take the heavier rocks leave the rest and one of us overhead carries to next Speed bump while we alternate 10 merkins, lbc, or squats.  Share the load with the team. 2 laps.

Go to rock pile the long way while doing different exercises at each speed bump.

10 curls

10 skull crushers

10 rdls

10 Goblet squats

Gently put rocks back and moseyed back to launch. At each street on left we do 10 dollys.


At some point Taco stand informed us about how his sweaty balls got cold in the wind when he performed the al gore. This sparked one of the most elaborate conversations about “grundles” and the “sandbar” .  We had a lively rendition of Bette Middler’s The wind beneath my grundle sang by war eagle. Lets not forget the earlier conversations on the way to the rocks where informed of Mrs. Chead curds terrible accident which got turned up a notch when war eagle mentioned an MMA fighter lost a finger😟.  Lots of great mumble chatter and hard work put in today. Midriff killed it with Cheese Curd today even after doing a similar workout the day before

YHC had some other things planned and I intentionally leave them here vague because I will be doing them again.

As always an honor to lead these fine men.

Midriff will be lonely on south mountain.

CSAUP s every where sign up for one.

Prayers for premature.




Heals to heaven at church 6/43

YHC was concerned for the safety and well being of his flock of Pax this morning.  I am not sure flock is the correct term but you can correct me later.

The Thang:

Due to the shivering pax and the conern of frostbite at 48 degrees we moseyed for .5 miles to the church at the top of the hill.

Warm up SSH X 16 Canadian SSH X16

Moroccan night club X 20.

Hand release merkins X10

Low slow squats X 20

Teams of 3 hit the parking lines. Each team did 10 merkins at each line and while teammates did squats.

Finish and team who won got 10x heals to heaven and losers got 5 burpees.

Repeto with 10 heals to heaven and squats.

Flag carrier run back to school.

Found more parking spots and did more team stuff. Intentional vagueness on my part as YHC will be doing it again.

If you were there you would know😉.


Ye old moleskin.

This workout i stole from different guys and picked it together my on way. I hope that it helps and also makes you a little sore. Big Ben always hits the sprints hard and today no different.  That guy is really fast. Das boot was wondering what the heck i had planned and went along with me anyway.  One star started out looking OK but due to the ridiculous number of squats he is now gorgeous 😍.  Fredo looks like he did like 6000 merkins last month. What a freaking beast. Long haul is still looking for a challenge. This dude backwards ran to launch because his quads weren’t tired enough and Fredo joined him. Much respect for the respects.

Thanks for allowing me to lead.

CSAUPS sign up.

Prayers for premature 🙏



Red light district 5/43

Well whats to be said? 4 crazy men challenged each other in the rain to be stronger.

The day went as such:

Tagalong wore his jacket that he uses when he directs planes at the airport.  We were all a little jealous though.

Midriff looked like he ate some bad food the night before as the rain hit him in the face but he quickly felt better and pushed to the front of the pack.

Rousey came out like a gremlin who got wet after midnight.  He soaked up the rain and asked for more. Then he forgot how to count  but we helped him out.

Yhc was super excited to be out in the rain. This is where the stories come from. Frankly it sucked but I couldn’t ask for a better group to be out with in this weather.

On our way back from the parking deck by the new building we crossed Johnston.  With the cross walk lit we had our heads up and saw a truck in the right turn lane. It had a red and he didn’t care at all. He skidded to a halt a few feet away. That wasn’t the only pair of skid marks out there today. Please keep your head up and watch your road crossings.


History of the world part 1. 4/43

If you were there you know what we did. The most important part of the backblast is recognizing the hard work of the men who showed up.

I hoped to impart some knowledge that I gained from Midriff the other week and I think it took. F3 is not just “about leading” it is about being able to share the daily load we call life with each other. Our struggles. Our triumphs.  And every thing in between.  Every one of us has the ability to lift up and help someone else.  It is a privilege to do so.

Today teamwork and learning that we don’t just do it alone was the theme. All of the men worked hard and all of our pain stations had that theme built into them.

How fast did we run that last mosey? Who won the challenges?

Periscope crushed it today and showed how much of an impact he has become in F3.

Brexit as always pre runs the work outs and kills it. Except today he slept in and killed the workout.
Atlas showed us how to play Mario cart while running. Hard to keep up with him on pre runs.

Cooter2 and war eagle were thankful that we didn’t run the hills. Me too. Also the War Eagle will never unsee Cooters well Cooter. Where his pants were 🤷‍♂️ mystery.

Bounty Hunter and his new boy band haircut made him faster. He had plenty of old man noises today but powered through. We are taking up a collection to buy him a working zipper.

Soft Pretzel had the skills to pay the bills with his perfect form. And he did the exercises well too. 😉

Posee made me tear up at his last workout at the arsenal. I tried my best to return the favor. He is a competitive nut driving the teams to victory.

Thanks for the opportunity to lead

Dad jokes continued STUD 3/43

Shop Till U Drop STUD

Well I am not going to make a long one on this backblast.  I was pleased to see a truck pull up and join us at the last minute.  I was afraid my 2.0 and neighbor Franky were it. Luckily Tinsel and Sonic got in the mix quick. Then the most amazing thing happened Flipper joined us on his unicycle.  Who knew he could also juggle while he road that thing?

Well we ran 3.16 miles and explored some new territory.  Glad to have met Tinsel and Sonic today from the fort. We all wished Udder was here but we understand he had to sleep in.  What a wonderful group to lead. Thank you all for being there.

Best dad joke today. Well it wasn’t my 2.0s inappropriate booby trap joke. But I liked flippers :

Why was the robot tired after his trip? Because he had a hard drive.

Dad jokes 2/43

When it is 32 degrees you have to bring the heat.

The thang:

Mosey to a parking lot near the Y.


SSH X 20



Mosey to lochness.

Realize that cul-de-sac has sold all the tables.

2 laps station 1 10 step ups each leg. Station 2 20 dips 10 LBCs.  Station 3 10 derkins 10 hand release merkins 20 dying cockroachs.

Break into 2 teams.  Team 1 60 thrusters at rock pile. Team 2 10 jump squats run to second station 20 hand release merkins repeto going up by 2 squats and down by 2 merkins switch when team 1 is back.

Second round 50 curls and other team does plank jacks and squats.

Mosey to the Y for a flag carrier or scout run. Front of line runner sprints out 10 second returns to end of line.

5 minutes of 10 count merry except for Jazz Hands improvised 15 count box cutters.


I told my 2.0 Sabertooth that I was proud of him this morning on the way home.  He told me he was proud of me because I did a great job leading. After I let mey ego and pride inflate I told him it was easy to do because of the great men in the group.  You truly make F3 fun and special.  Thank you.

Jazz Hands getting back out in the gloom recently has been great to see. Brexit  has been increasing his speed and his dad jokes. Cul-de-sac wanted to run further in the Flag carrier run cause he is a beast. Lex has like 68 more days of his 75 day fitness challenge i will be the first one to buy him a beer. Spare parts really put in the work today great job. Cheese curd was just knocking out the reps. Frehleys gave me some mumble chatter a little early and got quite until we were almost back to launch and damn near killed several pax with his shit talk. Tagalong’s beard made him sprint faster up the hills due some aerodynamic I couldn’t understand.  I didn’t realize Airwolf had a sprained wrist from a failed attempt to teach his kid to rollerblade. His wife dared him to go down the steep driveway.  Spoiler alert he didn’t succeed.  He still knocked out the reps. Atlas did a 2 mile pre run before workout. He finished with over 5 miles and still killed the reps . Wild turkey killed it today. Thanks for reminding us it is better together.  And war eagle gets the best dad joke award for What do you call a teacher who doesn’t fart in public? A private tooter.


Blood drive sign up.

Be on the look out for info on roof above packets.

Prayers for Rafi Cheese curds neice.

Thank you all. Remember good loves you and so do I. YHC kirby

Signature Laughs 1/43

Birthday Q! Well the planet made another rotation around the sun with me on it.  And with the temperature below freezing I get to break out my signature workout. If you haven’t been to one I only do it when it is subfreezing.

The Thang:

I gave some sort of vague disclaimer and took off.

Mosey to to 131 main.


22 ssh

21 Low slow squats

21 Hand Release merkins

10 each leg RDLs

Mosey to nail bar on Audrey Kell.

Stop and do 22 Rosilitas

Mosey to Audrey Kell high school.

Line up and Bear crawl to end on parking spot then sprint 2 parking lines. Repeat x3.

Now this is the part of the workout the signature comes in. 2 groups separate to give them time in algore position to come up with the best joke.  Meet in the middle in plank deliver your joke. Each team grades it and the Q delives Burpees based on the score.

Flag carrier back to launch. This is 10 second sprint out and end up in the back of the pack.

Come in plus 2 minutes.

Mole skin

Everyone put out a 100% today. They had too or they wouldn’t stay warm. This was a lot of fun for me and I hope for them. Frehleys always gives the younger guys someone to chase. For almost 57 he is an American bad ass!  Teddy shared with me that he normally runs up the hill to Audrey Kell and hates it. This gave me such joy. I have watched trickle in his journey of fitness really explode into a runner. After taking a fall on saturdy he still managed to get out and push hard. I am no stranger to taking a fall as well.  Midriff in his wisdom dresses scantily clad and complains that his legs are cold. Cold legs must mean you can sprint faster though.

A true pleasure to lead these fine men today and glad to have spent my birthday morning with them. This is Q number 1 of 43 this year. I made a commitment to myself and my health that I would Q 43 workouts 1 for every year I have been alive.  Looking forward to the next one. Ask the guys about the jokes. The last time I pulled this Q out Doc Mcstuffins owned the joke fest. I hope to see him out again soon.