Monthly Archive June 2018


Morning was sticky, no doubt, picked up Tuperware at 620 and headed to Sun Valley Middle for a bit of recon.  I know I q’d this site once was not sure if I have twice.  That said, there is a lot more to this site than the few times I have been there.  Tupperware and I did a 1.5 mile pre-run to get the lay of the land.  Ran around for a bit and came back to 11 men looking for a beat down.

Warm up- Quick disclaimer- Circle up, 50 SSH, 8 MC 13 MC, 10 Pistol LBC each side

The Thang: Mosey over to the busses.  4 merkins each bus all the way around finish with 13 burpees, 50 air squats.  Next set of busses. 8 air squats finish with 13 burpees 50 lbc’s.  Mosey to a bench area, 50 one leg squats, 13 derkins.  mosey to a partner event 26 pull ups 50 dips, 50 up and overs.  Finish that, mosey to the front of that school 2 burpees, 4 merkins, 8 American hammers, 13 burpees again, and 50 air squats with one lap around.  Finish with running the road along 8 poles, 8 merkins, 8 lbc rotation on each pole. Finish and head back for a quick 50 on legs,13 derkins and 50 dips again.


Moleskin: I think everyone got their monies worth, it took me a minute to realize that Crowbar and Tball brought BB (FNG) from the pool last night,  good for him for not quitting and pushing through on this muggy morning.  always good to see EE, he’s a man I always enjoy spending time together. Horse head as well but he put the warning prior to the workout that he may not make it, seems I may not be the only one that has to make a pit stop.  Great work by all, thanks Madisen for the invite.

Mountain Goats Tour Five Knolls

21 Goats arrived at South Charlotte Middle School with permission slips signed by their Mommies so they could go on a field trip off-campus.  Humidity was high but bearable… typical June Friday at the Goat!

Plan was simple… head to Rea Road and a tour of Five Knolls… a Devil’s Turn and Fast Twitch staple.

  1. Mosey to corner of Rea and 51.
  2. Leaders went on to Five Knolls, the 6 caught up and all arrived at Five Knolls
  3. Strange Brew led the Goats in some dynamic stretching
  4. Instructions:  Run to the end of Five Knolls, then return
  5. Rinse and Repeat until time, which is to regroup at Rea and 51 at 0600.
  6. Return to Launch choosing a) return straight down 51 or b) take scenic route through Cary Ridge, Coburn and Strawberry.
  7. DONE!

Excellent job!  Mileage 5-6.3 miles depending on pace and return choice!  That’s a good run!


One thing that drew me to run Five Knolls was that many Goats have never run that street.  Going out it has a great hill that is nothing short of Rashambo!  Coming back, you get a nice .75 mile grinder uphill.  And since the route is new for several, it meant you had to get past the mental to tackle the physical… aka BRR!

It was absolutely AWESOME to have Beaver, Stay Puff and Slice join us!  Beaver is returning from a broken leg/hip… STRONG!!  Stay Puff and Slice have been doing other things… but great to have both of you out!  I know all three will look to be regulars again!

Welcome to Dumpster Fire… he’s joined us a few times over Spring, but great to see you!

Great to have Madison and Gypsy join us!  I know you guys are putting in some serious miles, including Thursday F3 Sparta.  Please join us anytime you can!

The Mouth has made it 2 weeks in a row… BRR must be getting close!

Everyone put in some good miles this morning!  Insomniac gets the “Going The Extra Mile” award… because he did… and he was definitely bait and switched!  He’ll get over it!


  1. Great to see Dumpster Fire!  Thankful for his safe travels to Michigan, and continued prayers for his family.
  2. 4th of July 4-miler on Wednesday in Dilworth; Speed for Need

Thanks to Lois for taking us out in prayer.

Finishing the June merkin challenge

4 PAX rolled in right as the clock struck 7 on a warm June morning. Picasso and Cold Cuts needed 330 merkins to finish the June merkin challenge – 10,000 merkins in June which is 330 or so a day. Surprised they are able to post or even lift their arms. Disclaimer given and we took off around the school.

SSH, IW, LSS, Mountain Climber, Peter Parker and Parker Peter
Mosey to trail

Run around the trail x 4 followed by Derkins, Incline Merkins, regular merkins, and CDD (apparently incline and derkins count).
Bear crawl up and lunge walk forward

Mosey to the back of the school and the picnic tables for leg work.
Jump ups, one legged squats, and donkey kicks
Rinse and repeat

Mosey to field and grab a rock
Line up for 7’s with the rock –
Set one – curls and merkins
Rock exercises
Set two – overhead press and jump squats (or merkins if you are so inclined)

Jack Webb with Rock (in reverse to get the merkin count up)
Return rock

Mosey to front playground for a circuit
Pull ups, dips, and merkins

Finish with Mary

Announcements –
Sandbox from Union County – doing great work in the community – check Slack channel
Great to see Abacus back from Yellowstone.
YHC didn’t realize the workout was mostly in the sun – sorry Cold Cuts and Picasso who had to walk home!

Always a pleasure to lead.

It’s getting warmer

It was time to close up the last installment of Ascent for June 2018. Most of the regulars were on vacation but as we were about to launch was greeted by an FNG, he arrived running. After the disclaimer was provided along with some guidance about F3, we were off.

Warm up
2 Lap around the track
15 Imperial Walker
10 Merkins
10 Low Slow Squats

The Thang

1. Run across street to church
Pick a rock
3 rounds-
15 Bicep Curls
15 Shoulder Presses
10 Tricep Extensions
Run to the Dumpster at end of parking lot and repeat after each round
2. Mosey back to the school parking lot with for the Starfish
Middle: 5 Jump Squats
Corner 1: 15 Carolina Dry Docks
Corner 2: 15 LBCs
Corner 3: 10 Lunges
Corner 4: 15 Wide-arm Merkins

3. Shoulder Work 2 (benches under the oak tree near bus lot)
Round 1
Dips x 15
Durkins x 15
Round 2
Step Ups x 10
Incline Merkins x 10

4. Run to Football field through the path over to Ascent Hill
Circle Up for some Mary at the bottom of Ascent Hill
Freddy Mercury
Baby LBCs

Next up, Run to top of Ascent Hill for Countdown to 1
3 Merkins at bottom, 3 Squats at top and continue up and down hill till the 1 count

5. Run back to launch but stop at playground. Pullups and Incline Merkins for 5 minutes.
6. Grab some wall for the People Chair for some Arm Raises and back stretches
Finish off with some Mary; Freddy Mercury, Flutter, LBCs and Protractor


Great effort by everyone. We had a good mix of upper body and cardio today. Since it was a small group, we were able to chat with the FNG.

Welcome to Sprockets..  Yes, he quickly broke into the Sprockets dance.


American 4 Miler

No charge for the Sauna

12 cool dudes didn’t stay cool for long at Kevlar this morning. Sweat puddles all over campus and YHC picked a bad day to forget a towel and seatcover. Cloth seats in the truck soaked up this mornings sweat like Puddin Pops “wicking” tees. After a re-introduction to many of the pax whom I have not seen in a while a dislaimer was given and away we went.

Run to lower lot near the hill and circle up for COP
Diamond Merkin x20IC
Merkin x15IC
Widarm x15IC

Run up hill to rock pile – grab a partner and a lifting rock

P1 runs accross the street around the island and back while P2 Performs Rock exercises (FLAPJACK)

R1 – 20 squats w rock/20 press/20 thrusters x3rounds

R2 20 dips/20 triceps extens/20 curls x3rounds

Put the rocks down and run to the field near the parking lot

Line up abreast –
Run the field – 10 merkins run 20 merkins run 30 merkins
Run 10 squat/20/30
Run 10 lbc 20/30

Put the above all together run 10 merk/10 squat/10lbc run 20 merk/20 squat/20lbc run 30 merk/30 squat/30lbc

head over to lot for Mary consisting of the following:

Left/right crunch x 10 each side
Plankarama till everything shakes

Moleskin: Admittedly, it had been a few months since I’ve been over to kevlar (been trying to get healthy from various ailments and been a little lazy). Definitely missed the AO and those that attend regularly, I’ll have to make it a point to be more regular in my own attendance. It was brutally hot in the pavilion, it was a welcome respite to be the runner during those rock exercises. The only breeze this morning was the one you could create by moving swiftly. Speaking of Swiftly, Purrell, Rhapsody and Orange Whip were crushing it on the field, running up front the whole time and chatting along. Looked like everyone was peacefully enjoying their own paincave this morning and there was not a dry spot during mary. Horsehead dazzled the crowd with some active recover Hulahooping when we made it back to the field, he is man of many many talents. Sounded like many were heading to the beach this weekend, hope everyone travels safely and has a great weekend. As always, it was a pleasure to lead this morning. Take care,


F3 dads MR Brady q 9 at Beatty softball fields
Speed for need on the 4th

Mid-week Break in

On a muggy morning in South Charlotte, Six Pax moseyed on down to the scout hut to stretch it out. Here’s what we did:

Devotion- God will provide- do not worry (Luke 12:22-31)

  • Corpse Pose- (Breathe in through nose out mouth)
  • Slowly get into Table Top
  • Cat Cow (5 times)
  • Side Bends (5 Breaths) L/R
  • Thread the Needle L/R

The main thing


  • Mountain
  • Sun salutation (X4, 2nd and 3rd OYO)
  • In Mountain, Move into AWKWARD (5 Breaths)
  • Back to Mountain and back to awkward
  • Mountain move to Chair (5 Breaths)
  • Move to Prayer Chair, and Chair Twist (Left)= 5 Breaths
  • Back to Mountain, Sun Salutation
  • To mountain and move to chair 5 breaths
  • Prayer Chair then chair twist (right)
  • Out of twist to mountain and Sun Salutation (X2 OYO)
  • Start Salutation, Once in downward dog Left right leg as high as possible and swing through to move into Warrior One.
  • Move to Warrior Two (5 breaths)
  • Move to Reverse Warrior (5 breaths)
  • Back to Warrior Two, move to starfish
  • Return to mountain, Repeat flow for other leg
  • Two Sun salutations
  • On your six
  • Butterfly- sitting tall, pushing your legs with your elbows in order to open up your hips (5 breaths)
  • Right leg in, reach for your left (switch)
  • Reach for both legs
  • Mountain- Sun Salutation (twice) go into a third time lift right leg up and go into…. Dead Pigeon (Right)
  • Hold for 45 seconds, and move into Down dog. Finish sun salutation, and move into another one until you lift left leg up and go into left side of Dead Pigeon Hold for 30 seconds, and move into finishing sun salutation (end in mountain)
  • Move into Child’s Pose
  • Finish in Corpse- review devotion


Gumby will be closed for the 4th- head to the 4 miler to support SFN instead:



Everything was going great. Lois and I showed up early, we got in the scout hut, I was able to deactivate the alarm (scariest part about being a Site-Q for Gumby) and we dropped our stuff to do our standard couple of miles before Gumby began. It wasn’t until I walked back outside and the door had closed behind me that I realized I hadn’t left the door unlocked, and had left the keys inside.

The lights were on, the alarm was disarmed… but there was going to be no way to get inside to stretch it out at 5:30. The stakes couldn’t have been higher.

Immediately, Lois and I jumped into action. Recognizing that breaking down the door was not the best way to maintain civil relations with church, we immediately circled the building, looking for a new way in. All doors were locked (And it is impressive how many doors a scout hut can have). It was about this time that I began contemplating how Gumby would work outside in the parking lot, on the hill when we began trying windows…. to discover one was unlocked and open!

Upon examination- those windows are a lot narrower and more precarious to climb in then you think. But thanks in major part to the flexibility that Gumby itself has allowed me to develop and maintain over the past two years I was able to shimmy in and unlock the door. Thus concludes the story  of how Gumby was saved one Wednesday morn.


Lighting for this session was just Antler lighting- and playlist was breezy summer classics. It was a good mix of regulars who showed up today- T-Claps to Arena, Beaver and Lois for pre-running.


Appreciate you guys! Always enjoy the opportunity to lead.

The Triple Play

14 Pax posted at CCHS for the best Friday workout in F3 expecting the usual – but YHC decided to forgo the pavers (this time).

The Thang:

Jog from parking lot to the entrance to the greenway

COP – 10 Mtn Climbers, 10 one legged merkins, 10 Peter Parkers, 10 one legged merkins all in cadence

First out

Partner up – Partner 1 does parking lot work while partner 2 heads over to pull up bars for pull ups (AYG) and squats.

Round 1 – Broad jumps down parking lot and bear crawl back

Round 2 – Lunge walk and crab walk

Jog back to the school, partner 1 grabs a rock, and head into the parking deck

Second out

Team must complete 50 burpees, 100 merkins, and 150 squats.   Partner 1 starts the exercises while Partner 2 carries rock up to level 2, down to middle stairway and down back to start where the partners switch.   Teams finishing first got extra credit of dolly with the rock while partner ran sans rock.

Third out

Down to practice field for a quick ladder.   Run 10 yards and perform 1 burpee, back to start for 5 squats, run 20 yards and perform 2 burpees and back to start for 4 squats, continue all the way up to 5 burpees and 1 squat.

Mosey over to drive next to football field.  Lunge walk from 1st to 2nd speed bump and then bear crawl from 2nd to 3rd.   Back to parking lot for a few minutes of mary and some IW’s or burpees (Mermaid’s idea) to finish out the clock.

Naked Moleskin

That one hurt.   Carrying the rock and then going right into burpees sucked.   Abacus pulled a fast one on the old brother and only did 20 out of 50 burpees.   Purple Haze continues to criticize my form (#fakenews) but I think it is a distraction from the real travesty called him doing a bear crawl.   Also, Purple Haze is supposedly a CPA but I don’t think he can count to 150 as they finished way ahead of the pack.  Maybe it was his partner that lost track – yea right.

Welcome to FNG Overdraft – brother of Lorax (they sound almost exactly the same except Lorax’s lisp is more pronounced).

Runstopper actually made it on time but Drago took his place with a late arrival.  The tardiness got Runstopper motivated to push Drago the whole workout.

Our site Q’s were both absent even though the regional Nantan and former site Q attended – not going to look good on the year end review (no bonus maybe).

I am smoked so hope the rest of you felt like you got your money’s worth.    My watch says I should rest for 3.5 days and I may just listen to it for once.


Pray for Olive (Greg Latini) and family as there child is fighting a virus and they already lost one child a few years ago.  Also, continue to pray for Jennings Palmer.

American 4 miler and Speed for Need race on July 4.  Sign up soon.

As always, an honor and a privilege to lead this group.

Well That Was a Cluster

18 pax came out for what was advertised to be a little competition. Q Fail and a bad weinke had other ideas. Ever heard the expression “A Monkey Humping a Football”? That’s what today seemed like to me. In fact, the inclusion of Monkey Humpers in the weinke might have been the only thing that could have saved the day.

Monkey – meet football. Football, here’s your monkey.

Due to self-sabotage (lost watch and keys), YHC rolled in at 5:28.30. I  attempted (and failed)  to assign each of the pax a number 1-5 based upon my impression of their speed, attempted (and failed) to group them in competitive teams, received observation from Hollywood it might have been prudent for YHC to have arrived a few minutes earlier (thanks, Captain Obvious), and braced for the chaos ahead. Only 45 minutes until this is over!

Warm-up: Ever get tired of running a lap and getting in a circle? YHC does. Today, we did it differently (and failed). Ran down the long path and stopped for a few warm up exercises as we went.

Jog to First light give disclaimer, allow Pax to complain about the lack of a circle- SSH x 20

Jog to Second light- Merkins x 20 (while waiting on rock gathering volunteers)

Third light- Hamstring stretches (clap when needed or when pax simply couldn’t contain themselves)

Gather at Transporter’s office for 1st failed attempt at a race

The Thang:

Group in your assigned teams. No Damascus, no problem…right? Wrong, Two teams had 5 members while the other two had 4 members. First landmine planted.

Round 1: 1s run to second street sign up the hill, do 25 squats and return. 2s go, 3s go, etc…While runners are running, everybody else is in wall-sits doing jabs. Audibled out of that after YHC realized it would wind up being 5 minutes of wall-sits and 5,000,000 jabs (fail). Al Gore until team finishes..nope, too long there too (fail again) everybody plank and don’t complain! Everybody finishes, off to the bus hill we went.

Round 2: 1s run up the bus hill to the awning by the steps. Waiting pax do merkins. (Fail #2- that’s a lot of merkins while waiting). Audible to Mary Katherines.

Round 3: Long mosey back to rock pile. 4 teams grab rocks. Indian run back to Transporter’s office. (Fail #3 – should have put rocks in hands of 5s and not 1s). Dasher took off like he’d stolen something. Everybody else scurried to catch up. Looked as if YHC had the only functioning team on the Indian Run. At Transporter’s office, we planked until everybody arrived. Flip-flopped and put rocks in 5s hands. 1s did 5 burpees to give headstart, 2s did 3 burpees, and 3s waited 3 seconds. No matter- Indian Run disaster. Rocks put away.

Round 4: It was at this point, teams were done away with and personal accountability was chosen in its stead. To the lunch tables:

50 dips

40 merkins

30 LBCs

20 Step-ups

10…I forgot. Oh yeah, I remember, 10 burpees

Pistol LBCs while waiting on 6.

Most completed the set. We moseyed to front of school for some ring runs.

Ring Runs: Starting at flag pole, run clockwise around circle until you meet the flag pole. 10 Bonnie Blairs and return counterclockwise to beginning for 10 more. Once finished, run back clockwise ALL the way around the parking lot for 10 Bonnie Blairs. When you complete those, run counterclockwise ALL the way around the parking lot in the opposite direction until you reach flag pole for…you guessed it, 10 Bonnie Blairs.

A few completed this. Once all were gathered back at the starting point, YHC decided to request a “AYG” back to the starting place. Apparently most tanks were depleted. Freddy Mercury’s and then hold legs at 30 degrees until time expired. The End.


My apologies for the “Charlie Foxtrot” of a weinke this morning. It was definitely a disheveled mess. Like most bad ideas, it looked really good on paper! Hopefully the pax got a good workout in in spite of my best efforts. I believe one of the Crapple watches reported us covering 2.65 miles or so. In referencing the Q, Dasher said, “You had good intentions.” In Southern parlance, that’s akin to saying “Bless your heart.” At least we didn’t hand out participation trophies at the end!!!

No announcements. Thanks, Doughboy for taking us out.

Rising Meadow Intervals

20 Goats gathered for a cooler, but still humid June morning for a crowd favorite… :30-:30-1:00 intervals… on Rising Meadows.  Here was the program:

  1. Mosey to Rounding Run; Dynamic stretching
  2. Mosey to Rising Meadow
  3. I-Pace up Rising Meadow for :30, recover to start x2
  4. I-Pace up Rising Meadow for 1:00, recover to start
  5. Complete 5 rounds
  6. Mosey back to launch; stretching led by Nomad
  7. DONE!

Excellent job!  Only 4 miles, but a hard 4 miles!  Lots of deep breathing!!


Welcome back to a few Kotters back:  High Tide, The Mouth, Goonie, Beefeater… great to have you join us!  This is a good workout obviously to get ready for BRR… join us when you can!

Thanks to Strange Brew for carrying the water over to Rising Meadow…

Happy Birthday to Compliance!

Thanks to everyone who commits your Friday to make Mountain Goat AWESOME!  You guys keep getting stronger, and it shows!!

YHC is trying to get better with timely Back Blasts… not doing so great!  Thanks for the patience!

Notable absent: Kilowatt (yes, meant to shame you)


  1. 4th of July Speed for Need 4-miler

Scratch and Sniff

What a treat to sweat and laugh it out this morning with these fine, ridiculous group of men.  Welcome back kotter Tilda and his FNG neighbor, Skimmer.  Evidently he has a pool and will be hosting a #VLY pool party sometime soon.  Thank you in advance.  Welcome to the crew.

Run warmup lap around track and pick up the LIFO.  Head down to the valley near the greenway for the warmup.

50 x side straddle hops

25 squats

15 imperial walkers

10 windmills

20 mountain climbers

Run to greenway bridge

Bear crawl x 3 over bridge with planks in between mixed with a few J-Lo’s and Mac tars

Run 1/4 mile to pick up pee soaked rock from drainage

3 rounds of:

10 skull crushers

10 squats

10 overhead presses

10 burpess


6 inches

Run to bridge for more bear crawl

Sprint 1/4 mile up Burnt Mill strava segment

Mosey back to AO

Rosalitas, Dollys, low slow flutters

1 minute of silence



Several #VLY mainstays and we are keeping an average of 8 pax weekly.  Strong, tight group with even better cafeteria afterwards.  Becky took the leader board on the strava segment being his stomping grounds, not to mention he runs like the pro footballer Beckham.  Speaking of football…… What’s up with the German coach and all his scratch and sniff antics?

Keep it clean boys.

Grateful for each of you,