Author Archive Paper Jam

The Weinke Stays in the Car

Late yesterday I received the call from Madison that he was out of town and needed a substitute Q for Gumby.  Arriving this morning. Swiss Miss seemed impressed with YHC’s quick turn around time getting the music and routine down. Little did he know that I keep a spare Gumby weinke in the car for just such emergencies.

Forgetting the disclaimer, these men were brave enough to go forward without one and since Fireman Ed was already in corpse pose (I think he was there since the night before) that looked like a good place to start


“Then the LORD said to Joshua, ‘See, I have delivered Jericho into your hands, along with its king and its fighting men. March around the city once with all the armed men. Do this for six days. Have seven priests carry trumpets of rams’ horns in front of the ark. On the seventh day, march around the city seven times, with the priests blowing the trumpets. When you hear them sound a long blast on the trumpets, have the whole army give a loud shout; then the wall of the city will collapse and the army will go up, everyone straight in.’” (Joshua 6:2-5)

Born in Egypt as a slave and then chosen as the assistant and successor to Moses, Joshua would’ve had a front row seat to all the miracles God performed during the Exodus. The Red Sea parting, manna falling from Heaven, water pouring from a rock — Joshua had seen his fair share of God doing the seemingly impossible. But just as time can prove God’s faithfulness, it can also put your faith to the test.

Joshua had witnessed Moses’ obedience over and over again, but as he faced the impenetrable walls of Jericho, this time the obedience was up to him. Joshua was instructed by God to lead his people around the city for seven days. This meant he had to lay his head down six nights in a row with the realization that the walls he had been walking around still stood tall and strong.

There aren’t many details recorded of what went through Joshua’s mind during those seven days, but what is recorded is his steadfast obedience. Surely he fought doubt, but with each day that passed, Joshua continued to lead his people around a wall that showed no evidence of falling.

Like Joshua, you have a choice to make when you don’t feel God. Will you keep walking even though it doesn’t seem to be working? Will you continue to believe God is moving even when the wall isn’t?

Your faith might be getting put to the test right now, but don’t focus on what hasn’t happened — focus on what has happened. If you’ve seen God do it before, He can do it again. Obedience is your responsibility; the outcome is God’s.


Warm up with butt kicks, toy solider, hip rotations, quad stretches, then onto the main event.

Concentrating on hip and IT band today, started out with a calf stretch and hamstring stretch using a chair as a prop. Then moving into a seated hip stretch. Then to a standing position: loosened up the shoulders, tricep and chest.

Moving to the ground: pigeon, low lunge, dead pigeon and inner thigh-groin stretch, finishing with chid’s pose.


Looking for PAX to help with Alexander Youth Network on Saturday August 19th or 26th. It is simple. Show up for about an hour and play a game with the kids (football, basketball, etc.). Reach out to Joker to sign up:

Wild Turkey is looking for one more person to join his RAGNAR team.

Thank you Arena for taking us out and Madison for allowing me to sub and lead these great men.

You’re not serious about that running stuff, are you?

On a steamy Saturday morning following an evening down pour, a white Range Rover pulled into the parking lot which signaled Escobar was up to the running challenge YHC posted on Slack.  Apparently Escobar does not troll Slack as much as the rest of us and he he questioned the Q’s commitment to a run heavy workout. That idea drew some chuckles from Mighty Mite, a look of disbelief from Arsenal, and despair from Twinkle Toes who has been missing out on all the fun lately.  After a quick disclaimer, 7 PAX were off.

I broke from F3 tradition and skipped the COP and opted for a Bratwurst style warmup for the ensuing running.  Just as we found a spot in between Bank of America and Best Buy to start some warm ups, here comes Fredo, a late arrival to the party, joining  us for: toy soldier, hop the fence, and some quad stretches to warm up the legs.

Once done with the warm up, we began our adventure up Rae Rd towards Stone Crest Shopping Center. We took a quick detour into a little grassy area for a delayed COP: SSH x 10, IW x 10, Merkins x 10.  Conveniently located next to the grassy area were some flimsy park benches which led to questioning by Bucky and Might Mite if they would hold. 2 Rounds of 15 dips, 15 derkins and 15 step ups (or squats).

From there instead of going back out to Rae, we took a quick detour towards my hood for our run.  The rule: at every street corner stop and perform 25 toe tap crunches and another set of Mary waiting on the six.  There were stops at Alexander Martin Ave., Eudora Ln, Alma Blount Blvd., Darcy Hopkins Drive, Treat Woods Dr., Beaver Brook Way, Bay Tree Way, Totterridge Rd, Parkchester, before stopping in my driveway to do a set of merkins.

YHC ignored requests for food, water, and use of the bathroom and we went over to Parks Farm Lane via the cut through to arrive at the neighborhood park for field of plank.  Line up on the near side of the field, five lunge walks towards the far side of the field and perform the called plank. Regular plank, elbow plank ,Makhtar N’Diaye, right arm high, left arm high and that was enough.

Mosey to the parking lot for some squats and to watch Mighty Mite attempt to dunk a basketball, miss a jump shot and layup (he looked like a true NC State player) and back to running.  Stops on Parks Farm Lane and Fieldgate Drive for some more mary were in order before we went back to Rae Rd. to head back towards Blakeney.

We paused at Bellegarde Drive, Southbrook Drive and Alexander Martin Dr. for more core work before we crossed over to run towards the playground at the shopping center.

Upon arriving at the playground the promise of pull ups and stretching was fulfilled. First, 10 pull ups and 15 dips.  Then loosen up the hamstrings, hip flexors, IT band and calves  with some broga moves (come to Gumby on Wednsday for the extended version) and back to the AO and the appearance of Paper Clip running out of the Chick-Fil-A to give his daddy a big hug.


Since I am not a runner I cannot tell you exactly how many miles we covered, my guess was about 3. But we did close to 400 ab exercises, so I know we should be feeling that tomorrow. It was fun to take the daVinci faithful of a tour thru my hood. We did not have any announcements, so YHC led the takeout and we were done. I am always grateful to have the opportunity to lead a great group of men.

Bring Your Running Shoes

On a relatively cool July morning, 14 PAX (including a FNG) joined YHC to see if he actually had running shoes. After the approved Area 51 disclaimer, a short mosey, and then a lap around the track and it was time for:


SSH x 15, 5 Merkins OYO,  IW x 15, 5 Diamond Merkins OYO, LSS x 15, 5 Merkins OYO, Flutter x20, 5 Diamond Merkins OYO, LBC x 20


Mosey to the main playground and partner up, size doesn’t matter, speed may: Each partner perform 7 pull ups, run around school in opposite directions and when you meet do 10 hand slap merkins, return to the playground. Two rounds,perform mary waiting on 6.

While at the playground grab some bench space or a playground bar for derkins x 15, Dips x 15, split leg squats x 10 each leg all on Q count.

Mosey to other side of the school by stumps. Partner up, each perform 15 dips, run around the school in opposite directions and when you meet up, 5 burpees.  Two rounds, perform mary waiting on 6.

At the stumps, step ups 10 each leg OYO, split leg squats x 10 each leg on Q count, 15 x derkins OYO.

Mosey to the playground and combine the two, with 1 round each of pull ups/hand slap merkins and dips and burpees. Finish at the playground perform mary waiting on the 6.

While at the playground, 10 pull ups and run around the far traffic island in the parking lot. 2 rounds.

Then back to launch point for mary led by Lobsta Roll, Madison and Drive By.



BRR in September.

Anvil and DMZ converging Wednsday at Calvary. Hops is speaking after the workout. You don’t want to miss it even if you attend another site, take the short drive over to Calvary it will be worth it.

Union County 2nd F 7:30pm on Thursday at Hickory Tavern in Wesley Chapel. Here is the address: 6400 Monroe-Weddington Rd, Wesley Chapel, NC 28104


Welcome to FNG Litter Box who did a great job at his first work.  He has lost 40 lbs recently (awesome!) and his brother-in-law, Orange Whip, was lobbying hard for a kindler, gentler, name but none of the PAX would have it.  Pop Tart seemed confused at the beginning of the work out when YHC had his gloves, prompting a question about running shoes. I think he had the answers by the end of the workout.  Thank you Madison for the take out and as always appreciate the opportunity to lead.

6 for 5 and a Few New Guys

With our fearless leader playing with hills at Horsey, it left Bunker at the reigns of Blakeovery to lead 6 PAX on a 5 mile adventure.  At a little before launch time, Bunker provided the route and at 5:15 we were off.

The Thang:

Blakeney Shopping Center up Ardrey Kell, past the high school, making a right at Marvin Rd (State Employees Credit Union), then a quick right to West Providence to Community House Rd.  Make a right on Community House towards Ardrey Kell than back to the starting point.

We ended the morning with a good 15 minutes of stretching led by Paper Jam and Strange Brew.


It was good to see some new faces at Blakeovery. Madison and Strange Brew drove across town to see what all the hype was about and Stump Hugger set an early alarm that included a barking Pit Bull mix puppy and joined the fun.

Bunker, Wingman and Madison we in front with Paper Jam not far behind.  Strange Brew, fresh off his bout with malaria, and Stump Hugger put in a solid effort.  At one point Bunker went back to check on the 6 and then easily passed Paper Jam to join the others in front. I thought Rachel was the only one who lapped me, now I can add Bunker to that list.

We can include flexibility on Wingman’s proficiency list, next time he will lead the stretching.  Looks like all that YMCA hot yoga is paying off.

Thanks Bunker for letting me test out the new F3 site by writing the back blast. -Paper Jam

Left Turn To The Big House

For those who did not realize, it is Monday. For me this morning was a bit more challenging because I had to go in the opposite direction of my normal routine for the short drive to Pineville. 9 other PAX joined me, a few fresh off the Savage race, so after the disclaimer we were off.

COP: A great tradition started by the Site Qs asks the Q to designate one of the PAX to lead COP other than yourself, either by letting each PAX do 1 called exercise, OR 1 person lead the cadence counts of an exercise you call. The objective is to build and encourage peer leadership by coaching them through a small portion of the workout.

Pulp Fiction (SSH), Gump (Burpees in cadence), Private Benjamin (windmill), Skywalker (10 burpees OYO), Tool Bag (IW)


Shelter Circuit. Starting at Shelter 3, run to the other 2 shelters to perform called exercises at each location and then return.  Round 1: Dips, Derkins, Split Leg Squat  x 5. Round 2: Dips, Derkins, Jump Ups or Step Ups x 10. Round 3: Dips, Incline Merkins, Jump Squats x 15.  In between rounds, perform mary waiting on six.

Around the corner and over the bridge from Shelter 3 is a batting cage and right next to that is a small hill, nicely designed for 7s: 3 Rounds: Merkins and squats; diamond merkins and floor slap squats; all burpees.

Enough of the cardio, mosey to the rock pile, grab a lifting rock for:Curls x 20, Shoulder Press x 20, Triceps Extension x 20. One round of Triple Lindy x 20.

Mosey back to the AO and we are done.


Skywalker made his debut this morning in Pineville, for me, this was my 3rd time posting to The Big House. Dumpster Fire (a site Q) boasted that it is the safest AO in the region, which prompted a discussion of lost keys by Skywalker and Tool Bag.  Perhaps that is because of the 24 hr surveillance camera in the parking lot where we launch.  Maybe next time we can do some monkey humpers and rosalita for our video audience.



5/20-Run Ballantyne 5k and for those not participating or want to double down, Fredo has his VQ at DaVinci

Speed For Need was launched last week by Tolkien, in the fund raising stages, here is the info:

 Skywalker took out and thank you for allowing me to lead.

It is only 5:29 am…I am Right on Time

Warming up with a pre-run before your Q could be a bit tricky especially when you arrive to the AO at 5:29 to see the relieved look on the face of one of the Site Qs. So the mats went down, music turned up but the lights stayed on and we were a go.

Devotional: Titus 2:13, looking for that blessed hope.

Warm-up: Knee up, butt kick, hop the fence, toy solider and LSS

The Thang:

Shoulder stretch across body, Traditional Triceps stretch



Stand up-legs as wide as you can-fold forward

Seated-legs apart fold forward

Low Warrior I

Half Lord of Fishes


One-Legged Pigeon

Dead Pigeon

Calf stretch

We did 2-3 rounds of each stretch holding for 15-30 seconds. To round i t out I included some table top, cat/cow and one downward dog.


Swiss Miss will send out the Gumby Q schedule through December.  If a day does not work, switch with someone.

As always, thank you for allowing me to lead.

This IS Tar Heel Country

When fellow Tar Heel alum  Pop Tart reminded me yesterday afternoon that I was on Q this morning, what better sign than to honor our National Championship Men’s Basketball team. So 12 PAX ignored spring break and joined me in the celebration.

COP: SSH, IW, Merkins, Heels to Heaven, LSS all x 20 (the number 20 represents the amount of appearances for UNC in the Final Four)

The Thang:

At the main playground, partner up.  One PAX performs the called exercise, the other does a lap around the far traffic island. First Round: As a team, complete 41 pull-ups (in 1941 Carolina makes its first appearance in the NCAA tournament). Second Round:hand release wide arm merkins, each PAX does 46 (in 1946 UNC appears for the first time in the championship round),  Round 3: 48 floor slap squats for each PAX (Tar Heels have been to the NCAA tournament 48 times). Round 4: 57 dips each (In 1957, UNC defeated Wilt Chamberlain and the Kansas Jayhawks for their first national championship)

Mosey to a hill for a round of 6s (as 6 represents the number of national championships won by Carolina). Hand release burpees on top, diamond merkins on the bottom.

Mosey to the cinder block pile and partner up.  One partner does the called exercise the other runs to the first set of lights.  One round, should press 146 as a team. (146 is the combined score of last weeks 75-71 win over Gonzaga).

Mosey to the rock pile, pick up a lifting rock for 168 curls. (the total number of games UNC has played in the NCAA tournament-they have a record of 123-45.) Since we were running out of time and the PAX were about to stone Squid, I cut short the number of reps and we moved on to the sidewalk by the large field.

Partner up. One partner remains and performs the makhtar ndiaye as the other partner runs across the field to the parking lot to perform the same exercise. When one partner reaches the parking lot and begins makhtar ndiaye  the other partner runs to meet him and the round ends.

In the parking lot, 4 corners of ab escalators, 2 rounds 10-20-30-40x, LBCs and flutter.

Finish with plank-o-rama: regular plank, elbow plank, right are high, left arm high.


Something about a Savage race and a convergence at Anvil (Calvary church) on Wednesday led by McGee.


It was great to see the joyous look on the faces of the PAX when I announced the theme of the workout at the COP. Prohibition was especially giddy about honoring the Tar Heels and Lobsta Roll, in spite of his yankee upbringing, quickly rattled off the names of the starting 5 UNC players from the 1957 Championship team.

Joker was babbling most of the work out, but it is my guess he was suffering from hypothermia as he showed up only in a long sleeve t-shirt and shorts. A number of the PAX went to their cars and pulled out toboggans, sweat pants and sweat shirts, but Joker refused the offer and wanted to tough it out. We were all proud of him.

Thank you Squid for the takeout and as always humbled and honored to lead the men of The Matrix.


Baby Its Cold Outside-But Warm In Here

On a warm February morning, Swiss Miss assigned QIC a day to lead the Gumby faithful during the madness of March. Looking at the weather report and noticing sub freezing temperatures a week before Spring, I was again reminded how much I enjoy the heating unit in the Boy Scout hut. I fearlessly braved the cold, windy morning by running 10 yards from my car to the building, with yoga mat in toe, to get limber with the 7 other PAX who joined me.

After the proper disclaimer and warning about the partner work to come, we began with our morning devotional: Ready for a Breakthrough:

The Thang:

It is always a good thing to make sure that we are warm before stretching, so I lined up the PAX against the wall for butt kicks, leg raises and “over the fence” walks back and forth in the room and then LSS.

This was followed by neck rolls, shoulder rolls, cross body shoulder stretch, traditional triceps stretch and hands on the wall shoulder stretch.

It was time for some mat work: Easy pose, bring fingertips to ceiling, then round forward with palms on the floor, left and right twist and ending with butterfly and starfish.

Time to stretch the groin some more: stand up, legs apart, fold over, hands on the ground. Then sit down, legs wide apart, fold forward, grab your feet/ankles.

This was followed by Low Warrior I, Half Lord of Fishes (version A), Cobra, One-Legged Pigeon and Dying Pigeon (or hip rotator stretch).  We finished up with some knee to chest and low back stretches.

There were several rounds of each exercise holding each stretch for about 15-30 seconds.


When Swiss Miss EH’d me to Q  Gumby, I knew it was a bit different than the other F3 workouts because you have to figure out the exercises and provide verbal cues throughout the execution of the called move. That last part was the most challenging for me, but fortunately the PAX could see what I was doing (yes there are lights at Gumby-no gloom) when my verbal cues were lacking at times.

I decided to take a different path at Gumby this morning and depart from a strict “broga” format to demonstrate that it is easy to put together a flexibility workout by stringing together exercises for similar body parts. I could tell that Madison and Arena were disappointed that time ran out before we could get to the partner work-but there is always next time.

Thank you Swiss Miss for taking us out-and as always, I am humbled that I was asked to lead.


Crossing the Border

10 PAX ignored the freezing temperature to get swole at my guest Q in the Valley of the Sun.  Since Madison, Scalper and Champagne ran me into the ground this week, I was concerned about becoming a runner and developing soccer arms, so it was time to focus on arms and abs.

After a quick disclaimer it was a short mosey to the baseball diamond (spring training has begun) for the:

COP: SSH x 15, IW x 15, arm circles x 15, toe tap crunch x 15 and 5 merkins OYO in between each of the exercises.

The Thang:

Mosey across the street to the Goddard School parking lot and grab a lifting rock: 3 rounds of 20 reps: curls, shoulder press and triceps extension, triple lindy between rounds.

Mosey back to the middle school and find the tennis courts for ab escalators. At each corner perform the given exercise: flutter (10), heels to heaven (20), toe tap crunch (30), LBC (40)

Mosey to the benches near the yellow buses. Round 1: Dips (25), incline merkins (20), Round 2: Dips (25), incline merkins (20), diamond merkins (10). Round 3: flutter (20), heals to heaven (15), TTC (15).

Mosey to the playground in between the elementary schools for pull ups and decline merkins. Three rounds: 5 pull ups, 10 decline merkins. Then circle up for some abs:protractor (chosen by Smokey) then back scratchers (chosen by Double E).

Mosey to the practice football field for Field of Plank. Jog to a line, perform the called plank. Elbow plank, regular plank, elbow plank, right arm high, left arm high, elbow plank, reverse plank and finish with 10 reps of Makhtar N’Diaye (some trivia: his middle name is Vincent).

Return to the launch site with some time left for 3 Rounds of supline pull ups and merkins 10 of each and finish up with LBCs. (Forgot to mention: on the way back found a small hill for 10 more incline merkins)


When Madison reached out to me for a guest Q slot he told me that this was a fun AO.  He was not kidding, I felt like I only scratched the surface of all the fun that a Q could have at this site. This location rivals Hugh McRea Park in Wilmington as one of the best sites that I have visited.

I appreciate Madison and Double E taking me for a “tour” of the grounds right before we launched, I had performed a drive through and looked on google maps, but there is nothing like running around the site to make sure what you had planned would work.

I discovered some interesting things in Union County (1) Madison likes to wear running tights but no shorts, (2) Woody wears a scarf to an F3 workout, (3) Shake & Bake doesn’t follow me on Twitter or he wouldn’t have showed up with a Boston Red Sox license plate (10 burpees for that), (4) Bullwinkle likes to make an entrance, showing up late and triggering a UC tradition of a  5 burpees penalty for everyone (I am an SOB so I respectfully declined), (5) Manziel is a proud Browns fan (maybe he should go see Fraizer for that issue).

For those involved in the pull-up merkin challenge, the final numbers are 135 merkins and 45 pull ups.

One of the blessings of Qing outside of your area is meeting other great F3 PAX and realizing we are all part of one big community.

Thank you Smokey for taking us out and I am always  humbled and honored to serve the men of F3.

Are we really running?

8 dedicated PAX braved sub freezing temperature to answer the question, does Paper Jam really run?  After a proper disclaimer was provided and over 3 miles later, they had their answer:


Mosey through the apartment complex next to Chic-Fil-A, stopping at each speed bump we came across to perform 5 merkins. Running back along Rea Road we ended up at at the fountain in Blakeney Park to warm up the upper body: regular arm circles x 10, reverse arm circles X 10, dips x 15 and incline merkins x 15.

Then run over to the parking lot area near OrthoCarolina for IW x 15, LSS x 15 and crunches x 15.

The Thang:

Divide into teams of 3s and mosey to the traffic circle in the neighborhood behind Elevation Church. The idea: as a team of 3, run down to the end of the street, perform an exercise and run back to the traffic circle. 3 rounds on each street a different exercise on each street. But after running back and forth a few times, figured out what looked good on google maps and on paper did not work well. So an audible was called and after a few runs, we regrouped at the traffic circle and we were off.

Run to the First Citizens parking lot for some mary. LBCs and heels to heaven.

From there it was running up Blakeney Heath, stop once to perform some merkins, second stop at the first neighborhood entrance for some Wojo squats then to our favorite rock pile as I don’t want soccer arms with all this running.

Grab a lifting rock, then in cadence: 20x curls, 20x shoulder presses and 20x triceps extensions. Then I introduced the SOB crowd to the Triple Lindy 15x. put the rock down.

Run up to the playground for some grinders. Back into your team of 3s. Pull-ups, LBCs and running back and forth. 5 rounds.

Then a round of plank-o-rama: regular, 6-inches, right and left hand high, elbow plank.  A different PAX gives each plank a 10 count.

Leave the play ground, run back to the rock pile: Triple Lindy 15x in cadence, then 15x curls, 15x shoulder press and 15x triceps extensions OYO.

Run back to the parking lot near 131 Main for some mary. Flutter kicks, rosalita, LBCs, crunches and can openers.

Run back to the launch point, stopping at some random corners for squats.

Back at the launch, 3 burpees each in honor of Ruth Samuelson, beloved mom of McGee.


In April, Richard Sheltra 5 k, this event honors the 19 year old firefighter, of the Pineville Volunteer Fire Department, who died in the line of duty recently. All proceeds will benefit the “Richard Sheltra Memorial Fund” which is designed to purchase New Turnout Gear and Educational Expenses for first responders. F3 needs a presence at this event. Reach out to Dumpster Fire

Looking for PAX who attend The Maul or Rebel Yell to start a 3rd F at the Chic-Fil-A after the workout.

SOB Land board encouraging feedback on outreach opportunities for our region, see board members Soft Pretzel, Argonaut, Thin Mint, Frehleys, Wild Turkey or General.

Charlotte Rescue Mission, which is a men’s shelter for those recovering from addiction, Saturday at 9am F3 leads a very modified workout for the residence of that shelter. Reach out to Tootsie for more details and to get involved. This is an older 2.0 friendly service opportunity (10 yrs or older).

Church on the Street, serving food to homeless men and women in Charlotte. Excellent service opportunity, well run and organized. 2.0 and M friendly (kids should be 10 yrs or older). Sign up  through F3 app or newsletter.

Finally, the video is a shout out to my friend McGee who quotes this song at every workout we attend together-we are all thinking about you, standing by you and here to support you in any way we can during this time.