Author Archive Gerber

DiCCS were given (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)


– 0.25 Mile – Mosey
– 15 x SSH
– 15 x Merkin
– 15 x Imperial Walkers
– 10 Count – Calf Stretch Each Side
– 10 Count – Upward Dog
– 10 Count – Downward Dog

Unit Two
Do the following 4 times (i.e., 1 mile)
– 0.25 Mile – Mosey
– 10 x Burpees
– 20 x Jump Squats
– 30 x Air Presses

Do the following 4 times (i.e., 1 mile)
– 0.25 Mile – Mosey
– 10 x Merkins
– 20 x American Hammers (2 is 1)
– 30 x Flutters (2 is 1)

Do the following 4 times (i.e., 1 mile)
– 0.25 Mile – Mosey
– 10 x Big Boy Sit-ups
– 20 x Bear Crawl
– 30 Count x Plank

Do the following 4 times (i.e., 1 mile)
– 0.25 Mile – Mosey
– 10 x Dry docks
– 20 x Heels to Heaven
– 30 x Monkey Humpers

Extra Credit
– 0.25 Mile – Mosey
– 10 x Burpees
– 20 x American Hammers
– 30 x Flutters



Unit Two to start off was the worst!

The Greasy Pork Sammy

DiCCS were given (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)

Warm Up:

  • SSH x 25 IC
  • Merkins x 15
  • Mountain Climbers x 15 IC
  • Lunges x 25

The Thang:

  • Grab your cinderblock and let’s have some fun
  • Run 1/8 mile out and 1/8 back – 50 Curls with cinderblock
  • Run 1/4 mile out and 1/4 back – 50 Shoulder Presses with cinderblock
  • Run 1/2 mile out and 1/2 back – 50 yard bear crawl pushing the cinderblock
  • Run 1/8 mile out and 1/8 back – 50 Bobby Hurley’s
  • Run 1/4 mile out and 1/4 back – 50 Goblet Squats with cinderblock
  • Run 1/2 mile out and 1/2 back – 50 jump over your cinderblock burpees
  • Still have a few minutes!
  • Run 1/8 mile out and 1/8 back – 50 Curls with cinderblock
  • 5 burpees


Name-o-rama and Speed Bump took us out in prayer today.


This morning was tough.  The 50 burpees to end the second set was brutal.

Great work Nails pushing through.

Good job Speed Bump and Orkin running the 1/8 and 1/4 out and back and riding the mile loops on their bike.

Saw a flyby of Deadwood towards the end of the workout and saw Chastain and Brutus having some alone time on Brutus’s back porch while running by.

Table for Five… TO GO!

DiCCS – don’t sue your parents….

Tonight’s fine dining menu featured:

1/4 mile jog
SSH x 20
Imperial walkers x 20
Mtn climbers x 20
Plank/6 inch/plank hold x each 15sec
Calf stretch

Sprint 100 yards & 10 Bombjacks
Sprint 100 yards & 10 merkins
Complete 5 sets of each

Run 1/4 mile

Ab Time – between each exercise Bear Crawl 10 yards
20 x LBCs
20 x Gas Pumps
20 x Box Cutters
20 x Flutters
20 x Rosalitas
20 x Heels to Heaven
20 x Freddy Mercury’s
20 x Big Boys

1/4 mile run

Time to take a load off and find a seat, ledge or bench for a Derkin & Dip Web – 1 x Derkin & 4 x Dips
Add 1 & 4 reps to each round, finish at 10 & 40

After Dinner Cocktail
20 x Low Slow Squats and a 1/6 mile mosey
20 x Hip Dips (10 each side) and a 1/6 mile mosey
20 x American Hammers and a 1/6 mile mosey
10 x Burpees and a 1/6 mile mosey


All came hungry, all left tired, and with an Ice Pop and a Juice Box, success!

The 10ft Minimum Socially Distanced Pasta Party

DiCCS were given (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)

Warm Up
1/2 mile mosey
10 x SSH IC
10 x Imperial Walkers IC
10 x Plank Jacks IC
10 x Mountain Climbers IC
Calf Stretch
10 x Merkins
Upward dog hold 10 count
Downward dog hold 10 count

Pasta Party
10 x shoulder taps (2 taps is 1) & then 10 x Merkins
Flip over in reverse plank and hold for 10 count, stay in reverse plank and do:
10 x knee ups & then 10 x straight leg raises (10 each leg)
Rinse and repeat – 3 sets total

Burpee Mile – Start with 10 burpees, run 1/4 mile, 10 burpees then 1/4mi, etc until 1 mile and 50 burpees completed.

Captain Therkin – Big Boy Situps x 1 : American Hammer x 4. Increase by 1/4 each set up to 10/40 with 5 merkins between each set.

Run 1/2 mile

Shoulder Web – Mike Tyson x 1 : Donkey Kick x 4 (without wall). Increase 1/4 each set, up to 10/40.

– got to 4/16 then ran 2 sets of 100 yard sprints with mosey back

– picked back up at 5/20 and did 6/24 then ran 1 set of 100 yard sprint with mosey back

– picked back up at 7/28 then ran 1 set of 100 yard sprint with mosey back



Great workout, thought we were going to have a flyby by someone but they got about 50 yards from our Captain Therkins in the street and pulled a hard U-turn.

With the 18ft wide streets of the Crest social distancing was observed at all times.

Great work and ready for some TO GO dinner later!

Maybe I Should Learn How to Read

In honor of Rudy’s grandfather turning 90 tomorrow, he developed this simple Weinke.

No Warm-Up, we have things to do


Map out a 5K (3.1 miles) in your hood.  At mile marker 1, 2 and the finish line complete the following exercises.  If completing with others (with proper social distancing), circle back for 6 and complete the pain station as a group.  They are:

(3) Burpees

(25) Squats (the ground was too wet and it was still misting rain)

(30) Derkins

(90) Rocky Balboa’s (AKA curb kick or Riverdance. Start near a curb or other raised element, and with a barely rhythmic motion, alternately tap the toe from each foot on the curb.) 2 is 1 so 180 single toe touches

Keep running and after the 5k and complete the burpees, squats, and derkins at mile 4 but ditch the Rocky Balboa’s.


Since today’s workout was mostly running Nails and I started from our respective homes.  The entire North side of the Crest was covered by all . Speed Bump joined in on the exercises but did the mileage on his bike today.

I also did not realize the Rocky Balboa’s were ONLY supposed to be done at 3.1 miles, not at mile 1 or 2…. OOPS, those things sucked!

Great job everyone!

Anyone Out There?

DiCCS were given (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)

Mosey ½ mile

Warm Up:

  • SSH x 15 IC
  • Imperial Walkers x 15 IC
  • Calf Stretch
  • Merkins x 10
  • Mountain Climbers x 10 IC

The Thang:

  • Run .1 mile + 10 Merkins x 3
  • Run .1 mile + 10 Bobby Hurleys x 3
  • Run .1 mile + 5 Burpees x 3
  • Run .1 mile + 10 Dry Docks x 3
  • Run .1 mile + 10 Speed Skaters (2 is 1) x 3
  • Run .1 mile + 10 Merkins x 3

Ab Web

  • 1 Big Boy Situp
  • 1 Flutter IC
  • 4 Merkins
  • Increase by 1 on the situps and flutter but keep the Merkins at 4 until you get to 10 Big Boy Situps, 10 Flutters IC, and 4 Merkins

Still some time left

  • 10 Hip Dips on each side
  • Run .1 mile
  • 10 Hips Dips on each side
  • Run .1 mile
  • Hear a train in the distance, 1 minute left…. Burpees for a minute


Name O Rama

Great job taking us out Nails!


Great workout, thanks for the WOD suggestion Smithers.

Saw a flyby of Fuse Box during out workout today and some other guy I’ve never seen in our neighborhood, ever.

Keep perspective in mind this week gents.

Backside of the Crests

Since Monday is usually an Ignition or Flash day the easy fix for those who want to do Ignition is to add a 2 mile prerun on the front end of the virtual workout

2 Mile solo pre-run w/ a Zinfandel flyby at mile 1.  Nice to see someone else out there in the gloom.  With about a half mile to go Nails passes by on the bike headed to Virtual Flash.

Head back to to the new everyday COT (my driveway) to meet up with Speed Bump and Nails for the Cock-a-doodle-doo.


Warm up
Slow mosey .25 miles
Spread out (10′ or more is preferred in the Crests)  for 15 low slow squats , 15 imperial walkers, calf stretch, 10 Merkins, 10 Mountain Climbers

The Thang:
Find a .25 mile stretch triple nickel ( 3 exercises/ 5 times) running does not count

10-Jump Squats—5-burpees —10-bomb jacks
(At start of quarter mile 10 jump squats , halfway 5 burpees , at end 10 bomb jacks turn around rinse and repeat 4 more times).

Hip Dips – 10 on each side

Mosey .25 mile
Walking lunges – 20 then 3 burpees, 15 then 3 burpees, 10 then 3 burpees, and 5 then 3 burpees

Mosey .25 mile
Jack Webb 1 Merlin 4 air presses – 2 merkins 8 air press ect.. get to 6 merkins and 24 air-presses
Mosey .25 mile

Finish the Webb picking back up at 7 merkins and 28 air-presses get to 10 merkins and 40 air-presses

Mosey to COT and finish with ab work:
1 burpees, 4 big boys , 8 heels to heaven , 12 second elbow plank

2 burpees, 8 big boys , 12 heels to heaven , 16 second elbow plank

3 burpees, 12 big boys , 16 heels to heaven , 20 second elbow plank

.2 mile hard mosey to finish strong.



Cradle to grave


Tales From the Crest

A few guys from the Crest decided to meet up for an unofficial workout at the Briarcrest Clubhouse today.

Due to rain this morning an audible was made for an unofficial meet up at 1pm after lunch.

DiCCS were given (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)

Mosey from the clubhouse to the intersection of Laurel Hill and Radcliffe to begin a preview .45ish loop of the upcoming course.  Ran the Laurel Hill/Brynmar/Avalon/Radcliffe loop explaining the four corners of 8 exercises:

Warm Up:

  • SSH x 10 IC
  • Imperial Walkers x 10 IC
  • Calf Stretch

The Thang:

First Loop

  • Corner 1: 10 Burpees
  • Corner 2: 10 Wide Arm Merkins
  • Corner 3: 10 Knee Slaps
  • Corner 4: 10 Big Boys Situps

Second Loop

  • Corner 1: 10 Mike Tysons
  • Corner 2: 20 Single leg Speed Skaters
  • Corner 3: 20 Pistol LBCs (10 each leg)
  • Corner 4: 20 Low Slow Squats

Two Loops equals 1 round, goal was 4 rounds.


This one was a burner.  Not sure if it was the humidity, the daylight which made it seem awkward, the neighbors driving by with quizzical looks, Zinfandel spying on us from his bubble, or Brutus filming us from his front sidewalk.

Some got in all 4 rounds and for those that didn’t came close.  With a longer loop that included a decent sized uphill portion made this course a tough one.  Everyone got in between 3.75 and 4.5 miles, well done!

The PAX numbers were purposely small (5) and everyone did a great job of staying 10+ feet apart and using different parts of the street and corners of the intersections.

It was great to see everyone from afar and know that I would not have pushed myself nearly as hard if the other 4 guys weren’t out there so thanks.

Also, being in the house all day gets pretty batty so this was a much needed break and detour.

Good to see Minute Man out there this morning.  Hopefully we will see more of you see the workouts are temporally and unofficially in walking distance.


  • Social distancing is here fellas. Keep your distance, make good choices.
  • Look for the daily weinke to be posted on GroupMe


Keep it moving Monday

Mid 40’s, clear skies.  Couldn’t ask for a better start to March and 15 PAX apparently agreed.

DiCCS were given (Disclaimer, Cell phone, CPR, Safety)

Time to move as the goal was to keep moving today and log some miles.

Mosey down the front road to the side high school lot.

  • Side Straddle Hop x 20 IC
  • Merkins x 10 IC
  • Calf Stretch
  • Imperial Walkers x 20 IC

Mosey up to the light to cross Cuthbertson.  Random bus exiting at the same time.  Safe, orderly crossing of Cuthbertson Rd.

Time for the Burpee Mile.  Mosey down Waynewood to the intersection with Dobson

  • Run the Waynewood/Dobson loop but enter all 4 cul-de-sacs while running the loop
    • Squats x 5 when you enter
    • Merkin Shredders x 5 at the end of the cul-de-sac
    • Big Bois x 5 when you exit the cul-de-sac
    • Finish the 5th set sequentially when you complete the loop
    • The goal was to run hard between the cul-de-sacs and get that pace down
    • Complete the loop and run back for the six
    • Ends up being a 1.9 mile loop with the cul-de-sacs

Mosey to the pool parking lot on Dobson

  • Mike Tysons x 10
  • Run the ¼ mile to the other entrance on Cuthbertson
  • Bobby Hurleys x 10
  • Rinse and Repeat for a total of 3 sets
  • Pick up the six

Mosey back to the Waynewood and Dobson intersection

  • Run up Waynewood to the Cuthbertson entrance
  • Mountain climbers x 10 (2 is 1) at every other light pole
  • Pick up the six

Safely cross Cuthbertson (this time)

  • We had just enough time to take a longer route back to start
  • Since today is all about moving and getting in the miles, long mosey past the high school, bus lot, and up the path by Rudy’s shed.



I love Champion Forrest for Ignition.  Usually low traffic (although today seemed a bit higher than normal), is uphill both ways, and is easy to gauge distance due to it’s symmetrical layout.

Perfect day to log some miles which was great for Foundation and Smithers because they have been slacking in that department lately.  Great job both of you.  Not sure I would have posted at Ignition if I had run a half marathon 48 hours earlier.

Goodfella, Bottlecap, Glider, Legal Zoom, and Carb Load looking strong out there and in the front pushing all morning.

Mad Dog peaced out after the Waynewood/Dobson loop but since he made it all the way through Champion Forest, we’ll still give him credit for the post.

Dasher, Recalculating, Zinfandel, Deflated, and Rubbermaid were all killing it out there today as well.

Easy Button was hanging out mid pack but it’s cool.  We know how you roll show up when it’s time to race.

3/5ths of the Waxhaw Express team made it out to post today.  Hollywood has an excuse being at Great Wolf Lodge.  But Deadwood?  Texted me mid workout that he overslept.  At least that didn’t happen last Saturday as I would not have wanted to run the Rooster as a 4-man team.

Seriously, great job everyone.  No way this group could have collectively logged that many miles with those same exercises within an hour a year ago.  Just wouldn’t have happened.  As a region we are continually pushing ourselves and getting stronger.  Well done.

Thank you for the opportunity to lead today.


  • March is single Q month. This is a great opportunity to step up and Q your first workout or to Q if it’s been a while.  Talk to Bottlecap specifically about picking up a Thursday Night Clyent Dinner Q.

Rooster III – Leap Day Edition – Waxhaw Express Recap

What is a Rooster?  It’s basically a male chicken.

However, today no chickens were harmed because this was THE Rooster.  A 5 (or two man) Marathon relay.  The 5-man rules were simple.  Each team member runs 1 one-mile lap around the business park and does this five times for a total of 25 miles and all 5 team members run the last lap together.  The kicker is the person who has to run the fifth leg has to run two miles to finish the race, but more on that later.

The goal was to meet at the Waxhaw Lowes at 4:55am per Deadwood so of course Deadwood comes screeching in on two wheels at 4:59.55am.

Deadwood lead the two-car caravan and it wouldn’t be a Deadwood lead if there wasn’t at least one audible right?  Well when we pulled into the business park he pulled straight ahead into a parking lot that clearly wasn’t the correct one.  Audible 1, check.

We met up with Smithers and Foundation who decided to do the 2-man team and each run 13 miles – have fun with that, and set up in front of Comporium with everyone else.  Deadwood brought a tent and a propane heater for inside the tent, sounds like a great idea, right?  Eventually the propane heater made it outside the tent amid fears of hearing a giant “whoosh” and looking back and seeing a fleece blanket nylon fireball if that heater were to tip over.

6:00am or so and the race begins.

The Waxhaw Express Starting Lineup:

  1. Easy Button
  2. Deadwood
  3. Dasher
  4. Gerber
  5. Hollywood

Round 1

Easy Button started off strong but so did the other teams.  As we were running a total of 6 miles at threshold pace the key was to start strong but not gas out too early.  Deadwood, Dasher, YHC, and Hollywood all had a great first round and were situated in third by about a minute by the time the first round wrapped up.

Round 2

Round 2 definitely saw a little slowdown from the group but not by much (maybe 30 seconds for five miles).  Everyone still ran strong and we were in still in third place by about the same amount.

Round 3

Round 3 is crucial because this is when the lactic acid starts to build a little from the two hard runs and standing around in 35-degree weather for 24ish minutes between runs.  We finished this round about 15 seconds faster than our round 2 and noticed the gap was but shrinking a little bit.

Round 4:

The penultimate solo round or “movement round”.  This is where our running solid consistent rounds was paying dividends.  We traded places between 2nd and 3rd place twice this round and finished the round in second place.  The heat was on.

Round 5:

This was our drop the hammer round.  Easy Button had a strong first leg and shortened the gap between 1st and 2nd.  You could see the other teams starting to really glance in our direction.  Deadwood took over leg 2 and dropped the hammer.  He may have looked gassed coming in but we had a solid lead after Deadwood finished and there was no doubt he left it all on the road.  The other team had their fastest guy (who also had the fastest segment today of anyone) run leg 3 and he was able to retake the lead from Dasher.  However, Dasher laid down an amazing leg and we were in a solid second place when YHC ran his leg.  YHC was able to run down the first-place team at the ½ mile mark and I was either going to puke or die because I wasn’t going to look back and I wasn’t going to let either team catch me coming into Hollywood.  Hollywood’s fifth leg was a smoker which is BY FAR the toughest leg because he had to

  1. Kick Ass and hold our lead and,
  2. Save enough in the tank for the team leg he would immediately run into.

Hollywood came smoking around the curve with a solid lead and we knew it was ours to win or lose on the team leg.

Round 6 – Team Leg:

Here we were.  All those Ignition workouts.  The Swarm workouts.  The “we don’t wake up at 4:30am to be average” dark and cold mornings.  Hollywood looked pissed when he came in from Round 5 as if he had just been punked into running another lap and he had, big time.  But no time to talk, we had to move.

While we were waiting for him Dasher noted, “I promise to give my best” to which was answered, “we don’t want your best we want your everything”. We start off letting Hollywood lead our pack since he was coming off a lap with no rest and we settled into a tight huddle.  We were about 100 yards or so ahead of the team behind us and they seemed to make some initial gains but that’s how this day had been.  Hold your pace and be steady and run OUR run.  And that’s what we did.  We stayed together, we pushed each other, and we extended that lead to about 200 yards by the time we crossed the finish line in first place.


What an awesome morning of 1st and 2nd F!  I’ve done relay races before like the Palmetto and Blue Ridge and those are great and I highly recommend them but they are long, take you away for 2 days, and not local.  The Rooster is right in our backyard, takes up a morning, and is relatively short at 6 miles which is no longer than a long Swarm or Ignition workout.

The mile loop is great because everyone can hang out at the start/finish area to observe and cheer on.  The time between laps goes quickly and the 2nd F in between is great.  It was also great to chat with our brothers from Rock Hill and Gastonia who finished 2nd and 3rd.  Great group of guys and one of them were the 2018 champs so there was some well-intentioned ribbing and rivalries going on.

I can’t say how cool it was to see Easy Button putting in round after round of low 6-minute miles.  All I can say is the jig is up.  We’ll see you every Monday and Friday at Ignition and Swarm.

Deadwood ran the fastest I’ve seen him run.  I don’t know if it’s the new diet, losing a few lbs (always helps) or what but he was clutch when it counted and was ran negative splits on every lap.  Well done.

Dasher had the trickiest leg because he was going against the fastest guy out there today on the other team.  To hold his own and put us in a position to take the lead was crucial.  When you were laying on your back on the road after the finish I knew you had given everything and this is what it’s all about.  Hell yea.

Hollywood had the toughest leg because he had to put us in a better position going into every round, get the lead, hold the lead, and increase the lead, AND run two threshold miles back to back.  I’ll never forget the look on your face coming in for the final lap but you kicked it out there and set the final pace that allowed us to hold off an attack and then increase our lead on the final stretch.  Way to go.

We were given the F3 Rooster trophy with Waxhaw Express 20’ written on the side with the past two years champions.  So, needless to say we have to come strong next year with the trophy to defend our title.  The target is now officially on our backs.

If you haven’t see our pictures from today, don’t worry, the Rooster trophy will be making its “Stanley cup” rounds to all the workouts this week.

Final Note:  We talked to a lot of people today. Everyone had pretty much the same reaction when we mentioned we were from F3 Waxhaw and it was one of respect and admiration for what we have done as a region.  Keep up the great work everyone.  We are an example of how a region can grow in all three F’s and it’s not our little secret anymore.

Final Final Note:  On the way home we had Deadwood audible #2 with a right turn too early and then a U turn in someone’s circle driveway.