Author Archive Fuse Box

What’s That Smell? Clydesdale’s?

Seven Pax made it out for a post fire works workout.  I pulled in on fearing the group might have left without me….nope everyone standing around talking about the loud Boom around 11:00 last night.  Rumor has it that Screech Owl pooled all their fireworks together in one giant fuse and lit them simultaneously (big word for me – impressed?).  I slept through it though its all over our Briarcrest Facebook Page.

I heard Damascus’ story about not planning on coming and not setting an alarm 3 times….apparently he thought it was a good story.  Much like he missed the jokes on Monday – I believe I missed his story.

In my haste to get there in time and get the shovel flag up, apparently I wasn’t very loud when I said “1 minute after, lets go”.  I’m at the stop sign and hear Dough boy behind me “did he say go?”.  Turn around to look over my shoulder and get a laugh at the pax wide eyed fast mosey trying to catch up.  There was some mumble chatter about Q fail or something or other….they were so far back I couldn’t hear them.

Warm Up

Mosey to Dream Chasers, and then another lap around that block.  I warned folks on Group Me that we would be dogging horse turds.  So far so good…none found…..though Horse’s would come into play latter in helping to name this workout.

  • 25 Side Straddle Hops
  • 15 Mountain Climbers
  • 15 Peter Parkers
  • 15 Parker Peters
  • 20 T Merkins (apparently its a formal F3 exercise now – look it up)
  • 12 Potato Pickers

The Thang

  • Beat the Q.  Hot lap around the block.  If all Pax beat me, I do 5 Burpees.  If I beat at least 1 Pax – All Pax do Burpees.  As a cruise past Dough Boy I hear him saying something about the week off killing him today.  Having taken a week and struggle earlier this week from it….I know where he’s coming from.  Amazing what a week off filled with bid dinners and booze will do to you.  Anyways….get back to Dream Chasers to watch the pax do 5 burpees (I beat 2 of them).
  • Two teams (3 and 4 person) do a round of exercises in a relay/progressive transition.  Inch worm relieves legs who then run to relieve chest…  2 Rounds.  It was during these exercises that this workout got its name.   Beckham told me as we were inch worming across the bridge together  “Man, I was about to puke back there.  It smelled like horse piss”.  Well Beckham, there was a 4th of July parade here yesterday….that probably was horse piss.
    • 10 Derkins and 10 Incline Merkins at Big Oak Tree.
    • Inch Worms over the bridge (no push up)
    • 20 foot release squats and 20 step ups at other oak tree
    • Run the loop.
  • Another beat the Q with 10 Burpees on the line.  Light Pole Suicides.  I had Dough Boy beat and felt given a clear straight away I think I could have caught RubbberMaid.  However, at the end my Beat the Q Arch Nemesis decided to rear his ugly head (Sorry Foundation, its an expression…Obvious by your and Deflated Bromance you don’t have an Ugly Head).  So I’m 15 yards from finish line…my weak attempt at a swim move is stifled by a jarring blow from Foundation who runs me into a metal bike rack.  Through my hard breath I look up to see Dough Boy crossing the finish line ahead of me.  While they cheated, I concede and tell the pax I will give them there 10 burpees at Providence Road.  As I Clydesdale moseyed (walked) towards providence catching my breath I heard a sweet voice call out “How about we split the Burpees and we all do 5”.  Was that an angel I just heard?  No, it was Damascus.  5 Burpees on your own.
  • Mosey to short wall past Mary O’Neill’s for more rotational team work.
    • 1 legged step ups
    • Elevated Carolina NC State Dry Docks
    • Run to sign and back (about 50 yards) was the timer.
  • Mosey to Church for Ab work
    • 40 LBC’s
    • 20 Heels Wolfpack’s to Heaven
    • 12 Side Crunches (each side)
    • Protractor with 6 different degrees called out holding 10 seconds each.  It was hear that we learned RubberMaid skipped school the day they taught angle degrees and protractors in school.
    • Pistol LBC’s

MOLE SKIN (gross)

  • Great group of guys out today (but is there every a bad group of guys) pushing hard after consuming many a beer yesterday.
  • Glad to see everyone who showed up had all their fingers intact.
  • Strong work from Foundation going above and beyond on the elevated Carolina Dry Docks.  Damascus may have gone to the higher step too though I was not in a position to see him.
  • Somehow I did what I vowed to never do again – Carolina Dry Docks and Heels to Heaven in the same workout….Man I really hate UNC.  In fact…since they were elevated Carolina Dry Docks, I’m going back through and change it to NC State Dry Docks…they are harder and you can’t cheat like their brethren Carolina Dry Dock.
  • It felt great to finish in front of Dough Boy for a change.  That guy has been beating my butt at workouts all spring and summer.  It did feel good to finish ahead of him.  Though I know it will be short lived and he will be right back to his usual self very soon.
  • Rubber Maid pushed hard today.  His glasses were fogged up so much at the end that they were dripping from the inside.  Good work today.
  • Southern Belle and Beckham beat me in both beat the Q races.  Somehow I bring two guys out and within weeks they are beating me.  Good strong work from you both and glad to see yall are posting often.
  • Damascus had his usual creepy Man Touch Monday comment when Beckham suggested he Q a jujitsu style class someday.
  • I’ve incorporated the beat the Q in the last couple times I’ve Q’ed.  Before I’ve threatened we would have to repeat the exercise; however, today I decided to incorporate small punishments that were open to both the Q and Pax.  I think that worked out much better and pushed everyone harder.  Always looking for that little bit extra motivation and Beat the Q definitely helps get that last little bit out of the gas tank.
  • No announcements – Frack would be happy.


A Flag Day Celebration

20 pax made it out to celebrate flag day.  Admittedly, it was my first time celebrating the holiday.  Apparently Xerox and Yeast started early posting a funneling picture on Group Me the night before.  We had two pax roll in late – since they were both nice guys (Posse and Shake N Bake) I decided to wait and gave everyone a quick history lesson as well as the reason for the special counts today: 50 Stars, 13 Stripes, 27th version of the flag.  After several attempts to get the flag in the rocky soil by Posse, I told him to lean it against the fence and lets go…then BAM!  Turn right into Dough Boy.  Happy to admit I kept my feet (no pancake block today Dough Boy!).  Regain my wits in time to see Xerox coming in on two wheels….the late night funnels almost did him in this morning.



Mosey to the brewery.  Butt Kickers and Punters when we got close.  Quick disclaimer.

  • 50 Side Straddle Hops (around 37 I lost the ability to properly count.  Abacus would have been so disappointed).
  • 13 Mountain Climbers
  • 10 Potato Pickers


  • Reverse Suicides with 13 T Merkins at the lights and 13 Aussi Burpee (no Merkin); or what I call a standard Burpee.  Transporter held strong with proper form Burpees…I didn’t have heart to tell him it was going to be a chest heavy workout.
  • Noah’s Arc: Two at a time inch worm merkins across the bridge (getting an incline, flat, and decline position as you go due to bridge angles).  Jump squats while you wait your turn to go and wait on the 6.  I played a bad joke on the pax telling them we were flap jacking to do it again….after lots of groaning, a few tears, and threats of mutiny;  I let them in on the joke.  Mosey to Mary O’Neils.
  • 5 Short Wall Exercises.  I quickly learned who listens and who doesn’t.  A pax (to remain nameless) asked on three occasions what the count was.  I understand needing help remembering on 1, maybe 2 exercises….but 3????  That guys poor wife must repeat her self constantly at home.  The other thing I chuckle at is when pax asks “Is that per leg or total”.  I can guarantee you if you ask that its going to be the tougher of the two…even if I didn’t mean for it to be.
    • 27 Step Ups
    • 50 Dips
    • 13 One Legged Step up (13 each leg)
    • 13 Carolina Dry Docks with feet on the wall (Posse asked me if it was 13 each arm just to piss me off.  Jokes on you Posse, I laughed instead!)
    • 13 One Legged Lunge (13 each leg)
  • Mosey back to the Church for some beat the Q suicides.  Deflated and Foundation (almost like they talked about it in bed last night) jointly defended and handicapped the Q to allow everyone to beat me.  I was able to bring out some old football spin moves (though ugly, uncoordinated, and slow), swim moves, and and an attempted rip on Deflated.  It was fairly easy getting by him, but unbeknownst to me, that was all part of his plan.  By the time I got to the far light pole, I was wore out from all the extra work.  A short walk to catch my breath and then an attempted sprint to try to beat the 6….then I see Foundation jogging at me with a huge smile on his face.  I conceded and said “lets just lock horns and I will push you”.  Apparently he heard, “lets hug it out and you attempt to pull me to the ground”.  After some awkward maneuvering and hearing things from the Pax that would make a mother blush, I decided that was enough of Beat the Q (or was it).
  • I had previously promised no hill work today.  A quick check of the watch showed we had 10 minutes and I didn’t think we had done quite enough running yet today.  Mosey to bottom of the hill.
  • Backwards lunge backwards up the hill 10 times (Don’t ask me total or each leg) and then do 3 Carolina dry docks facing down hill (harder that way).  Somewhere in all that Transporter heard run backwards up the hill.  Thanks to the pax that were paying attention that straightened him out.  Halfway up the hill I heard some groaning, no wait; that’s a Car call.  Everyone off the road.  Recalculating said something about a parade so I just started waiving at the car (natural reaction I guess).  I was disappointed the person didn’t roll down their window and throw us candy.  My guess is they had no idea what was going on with 20 men on the side of the road at day break waving as they went by.
  • 3 minutes left so I decided we needed one final beat the Q.  Jailbreak to the car.  I begged (some would call it a plead) not to let me beat anyone.  I gave the pax a 5 second head start then off I went.  Towards the bottom of the church I caught up with Dough Boy, then over Dough Boy’s shoulder I see that dreaded grin.  Its Foundation.  “No Hugs”, but it was too late.  Dough Boy came streaking by and Foundation gave me a break.  We jogged it in.
  • Asked Transporter to lead Heels to Heaven while I grabbed my phone.  I jumped in around 20 and messed up the count asking them to keep going to 30….being must older and wiser than I, Transporter said he was going to 27.  Oh yeah, Flat Day, 27th version of the flag.  Yeah, better plan than 30, go to 27.  Transporter “What number did I stop at?”  My bad guys.  Q fail on that one.  Finish up with 27 Heels to Heaven.  Time check 6:15.  Count ’em off.


  • Great work today guys.  One of the bigger groups for the floater.  I wish I could say it was because of my great marketing skills of putting Honey Boo Boo’s mom on Group me to invite everyone, or that everyone was excited about flag day.  In reality, the Journeyman’s Challenge along with 2 FNG’s boosted our numbers today.
  • Welcome Crockett & Tubbs (EH’ed by Mad Dog) and Cobra Kai (Longhorn’s 2.0).
  • Crocket & Tubbs is from Miami (very close to being called Einhorn) so we went with a Miami Vice reference.  Good work from the new guy.  Trust me I know how hard that first workout can be (or any workout for us Clydesdales for that matter).  Way to stay with it and make it through to the end.
  • Cobra Kai is big into martial arts and likes the new Karate Kid series.  Attempts to call him Fox Sports or Poke for Oklahoma State where quickly nixed by his dad.  Good work today young man.
  • Too many guys to call out individually, but good work by everyone on a fairly light run, but heavy exercise intense day.  Sometimes the workout seems great in the head, but getting it out and understandable to the Pax can be challenging.  Thanks for hanging with me.


  • Loafer Meal Sign Up:  For those unaware, Loafers appendix burst and he is the Chef of the family.
  • Q School coming up soon.  I honestly zoned out on the date but its on a Saturday coming up soon.  Its near a Panera Bread in Ballentyne?  Get with Posse if you are interested.
  • Shop Dawg and Transporter were mumble chattering about who was going to share their announcement then when I handed them the floor, Shop Dawg got cold feet.  I can only dream that it was something good like free left over beer from the Sand Box party.  I guess we will never know…..

Mumble Chatter Mayhem

I guess the old saying is true (is it really that old?) “You get what you ask for”.  On my last back blast I commented on how the mumble chatter was down that day.  Whether the guys today came out guns blazing intentionally to show me up from my last back blast or not is a mystery.  My guess is, I just gave them plenty of ammo to talk.


Warm Up: 

Mosey to lower bus parking lot.  Asked the pax to partner up and start comparing interest to come up with a team name.  I also asked them to be creative- for example, if you both like bourbon, don’t be team bourbon.  Go with something creative like team neat.  Apparently that was all Bottle Cap and Money Ball needed to start the talking.

20 Side Straddle Hops

12 Mountain Climbers

12 Peter Parkers

12 Parker Peters

20 T Merkins

12 Potato Pickers

The Thang

I asked 6 guys to grab rocks (confusion starts right about here) and asked the remaining pax to do burpees until they returned.

Station Work:

  • Curl Press
  • Bench Up and Over (Gave plenty of demonstration on this one – again.  I believe Pax are now intentionally doing it wrong to attempt to get me going.  I remained calm.)
  • Dips
  • In & Outs
  • Derkins
  • Run Bus Loop – also will be our timer

A quote from Bottle Cap a few months ago “I can’t wait to read the backblast so I can see what I was supposed to do”.  So here is what the plan was supposed to be.  After a Q audible and pax that don’t follow directions well, it turned into something else.   The change out of stations was supposed to happen progressively (like the waterfall drinking game if you will – or don’t will; I don’t care).  Starting with the runners you tag out the next group who then tags the next group and so on.  Initially I had though that you would yell your team name as you tagged a team.  However, upon review of the pax ability to follow directions (or some would say the Q’s ability to succinctly provide directions in an understandable fashion) I decided to nix the team names.  So, how could this tagging out go wrong you might ask yourself.  Seams easy enough right?  Well………upon starting the exercise, three pax took off running.  If you are following along…it should have only been 2 pax (1 team) that ran.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa…lets regroup and explain again.  Everyone got it? Ok, good lets get started.  Wait, Dirty Bird – who is your partner…..”

And off went Dough Boy halfway around the bus lot (good speed by the way).   As the first set of runners came in, people started switching before being tagged, others got way into the tagging part of the workout (Damascus and Bottle Cap).  Almost to the point that I worry they troll elementary school play grounds just looking for a good game of tag to jump into.  Towards the end Bottle Cap and Money ball just took off anytime the runners came back saying the heck with the progressive tagging part (which by the way cut down on our work at the end since they were the last run team.  Some may be mad that they lost that extra work…I, however, graciously thank you.)

After 2 rounds of station work we moseyed to the railings for supine ladders.  10, 9, 8…..   At 3, 2, and 1 we held for 5 seconds to get an extra burn in.

Partner Push back to the rocks. Shake N Bake was aggressive out of the gates and ran me up Dough boys (I think) leg.  Sorry Dough Boy.  A less compassionate person would say get off the tracks when the train’s coming through…but not me.

As we returned to the rocks I asked those without rocks I asked to grab one.  Those with rocks – burpees until the 6 is in.  I return to find my partner – Shake N Bake with no rock.  Then I find those with rocks standing around.  Since most here are transplants, maybe its my native southern twang they can’t understand?

Rock work:

  • 21’s that once again turned into 30’s, though the Q improperly explained and at 7 said we are going to 7 (should have said 10) instead of 7 which left everyone udderly confused.  Money Ball made sure to call me out on it.
  • Press Ladder with a hold.  Changing rocks every couple counts – though once again I was accused by Money Ball of changing to the right because the rocks were smaller (He really stepped up his mumble chatter game towards the end).
  • Low Slow Squat ladder (though Shake N Bake questioned the slow part).  Shake N Bake also tried to throw a 4 count in there on me.  I was close to obliging….but I was gassed so we kept going single count to finish it up.

Mosey to the front of the school, Burpees while we wait on the 6.  Bottle Cap was first there but acted like the 6 was already in so he didn’t have to do burpees.  1 minute left so a jail break back to the cars.


Mole Skin: 

Judging by the amount of sweat dripping and being rung out of gloves and shirts, it was a good workout.  Even despite the inability of the pax to follow directions of the Q to properly describe the exercise rotations.

Loafer brought out an FNG (Slap Stick) who worked hard today for his first time there.  He is trying to make the Liberty Hockey Team having just completed Lacrosse season at Arkansas.

Shake N Bake worked hard as usual.  He talks to himself and attempts to motivate by calling himself fat boy.  I love it.  I thought about joking with him during the workout, but figured I would leave it for the back blast (or maybe I was too gassed to talk).

The usual suspects turned out some extra mumble chatter today.  Damascus really stepped up his trash talk game today.  I was impressed.  Bottle Cap started strong, but Money Ball gave it hard the last third of the class (That’s what she said?)

Dirty Bird continues to post and put forth a strong effort.  He gets a break for following the rotation as explained, but lets be honest….neither you or Dough Boy understood it….Dough boy was just the unlucky one who ran first.

Chipolte had a good showing today.  I believe one of the few that understood what I was going for.  I though Shake N Bake were on that same wave level too until I saw him rockless.

Mad Dog intentionally flubbed the up and overs and looked over at me with a sheepish grin only a mother could love.  I said my “Woosah’s” (spelling?), took 2 deep breaths, and returned the smile.

Hopefully everyone enjoyed the workout despite my Q’ing inability.  Good group today.  Lots of great commentary.  Good work.



Sandbox Pool Party at Lawson Pool.  June 8th.  8:00-10:00.  Beer and Pizza provided.  $40 per family.  Sign up via sign up genus posted on slack and groupme.

The No Name Workout

In my haste to post a back blast before getting to my Saturday Honey Do’s, I failed to come up with a clever workout name.  After 5 minutes of day dreaming about neighborhood pool moms staring at the computer screen, I went with the very uncreative No Name Workout.

Six pax showed up to see what exactly my guarantee was.  At the end, I think most would agree it was epic, legendary, a beat down, only tough because it was humid.  (If you haven’t noticed by now, I read Foundations recent back blast and figured out how to do a strike through… may get excessive during this back blast).


Mosey around school buses and half way up the  parking lot. Warnings, Form Threats, Disclaimer Given.

25 SSH

10 Mountain Climbers

10 Peter Parkers

10 Parker Peters

15 Potato Pickers (Through the hole is not a thing, except in the bedroom)



Mosey back towards the school warning the pax along the way that I wanted to try something new and that it would probably suck.

Circle up in the grass for Ladder Merkin down mixed with Ladder Maktar Jai (Spelling?) going up.  With a tip of the cap to Recalculating I did mention it was a version of Catalina Wine Mixer.  So…..9 Merkins & 1 Maktar Jai, 8 Merkins & 2 Maktar Jai…..   Around the 4 Maktar Jai mark, I decided that yes, this exercise did suck as bad as I thought it would.  I gave the pax the audible if they chose to take it to continue on with only Merkins.  4 Pax joined me in that modify, but 2 stayed strong and completed the true ladder.  I expected it out of Dasher because, well he’s dasher;  but I was very impressed with Mad Dog pushing through.  Good work.

Partner up and grab 1 heavy rock per team:

  • Partner 1:  Low Slow Squat with Rock.  Partner 2:  Run Bus Loop.  1 Round
  • Partner 1: Curl.  Partner 2: Up and over on the benches 20 times total.  1 Round.  (After thorough form demonstration that only Doc McStuffins would be proud of, half the pax still did the up an over’s wrong).
  • Partner 1: Press.  Partner 2: 1 legged lunch with back foot on the bench – 10 each leg.  1 Round.

Everyone: 15 Derkins.

Mosey to Railings for Supine Ladder staring at 9 and going to 1.  At 3 I added a 5 second hold at the end of 3, 2, and 1.

Lunge walk across the bridge with a jailbreak up the hill to the short wall.

20 dips, inch worm merkins to the wall, 10 donkey kicks, inch worm push ups to short wall.  2 Rounds total.  I believe Dasher was the only one to complete the two rounds (Surprise, Surprise) before YHC called an audible.

Mosey to the brick pile.

Partner 1: Curls with Elbows rested on belly.  Partner 2: Run down hill, hold fence for 10 low slow jump squats and back up the hill.  2 Rounds.  I gave modification option of taking gravel stairs to stay off the grass.  Finch and Shop Dawg laughed in the face of that modification.  At this point, I was pretty gassed and knew we had plenty of cardio coming so I modified (seems that’s becoming a trend with this workout).

Circle up as a group for brick work.  No specific count, just go until it burns, then put bricks down and continue without bricks until it burns.

  • Tricep kick back
  • 4 count front raise/side raise
  • Reverse Fly

Mosey to trees behind baseball field.  Hills – up and around the tree (Clydesdale modification was just to top of hill).  Tree 1, 3, 5, & 7 were front hill runs while tree 2, 4, and 6 were backwards hill runs.  I gave an extra disclaimer about wet grass, being careful, and modify if you feel unsafe.  When I was done I look up to see Dasher already running back up the hill.  Even with the modification, Dasher was on tree 7 as some of the Clydesdales entered tree 5 with heavy breathing.  I audibled and had everyone stop where they were and meet back at Bricks.

Burn out triceps one last time with 20 tricep kickbacks.  Bricks up and mosey to the bridge.  On the way there I warned Shop Dawg and Southern Belle that they were going to hate me for what I had planned for the final 8 minutes.  Shop Dawg said bring it, so just like the crappy cheer leading movie from the 90’s – I brought it.

Partner Pushes from the bridge to the left side parking lot.  Flap Jacking whenever the pusher gets tired.  I gave my partner Mad Dog the good news that I in fact did remember to brush my teeth this morning since we were going to be in such close quarters.  Unfortunately for me, he failed to do the same.  Mad Dog and I mary’ed with heels to heaven waiting on the 6.  Based on the remaining 4 walking in, I assume that was a beat down of an exercise.

Partner Pull from bottom of parking lot to the cars (at least that was my intention) flap jacking when the puller gets tired.  At the top of the parking lot, most of the pax were spent so I audibled (once again).

Walked for 10 seconds to catch our breaths then did a jail break to the crosswalk to end the class.  Dasher jumped out to an early lead, but apparently he never read the tortoise and the hare book as a kid because in a surprising upset, Shop Dawg brought home the gold.  We may have to incorporate some horse racing odds next time because Shop Dawg could have earned some big money on that win.


A great group of guys came out today.  A smaller group than usual, but quality over quantity today (those that usually come please don’t get offended, that’s a joke).

Very little mumble chatter today to spice up the back blast.  Dasher tried his best to add some lively discussion.  I realized today that all the good talkers are gazels.  Bottle Cap, Money Ball, and Goodfella just to name a few.  I’m beginning to think its not a personality thing (introvert vs extrovert), or an intelligence thing (as obvious with Money Ball going to Tennessee – I’m kidding of course), but I think its a Clydesdale vs Gazel thing.  I think us Clydesdale’s are so winded, that we physically can’t speak or think of anything funny to say.  I will continue to observe this new theory from the back of the pack and try my best to step up my mumble chatter game.

The towel made its appearance again this week.  Actually, I got tired of Recalculating asking about when it was making its return so I decided to bring him out of winter retirement.  I’m beginning to wonder if they (Recalc and my towel) have some weird side relationship that I don’t know about.  Either way, I asked the wife to use bleach when cleaning the towels.

Good work from Southern Belle.  He’s coming along nicely and improving with each post.  Thanks to those that continue to push the new guys and encourage them to keep coming out.

Shop Dawg put in some good work today.  Please take this as a compliment when I say this, but I hope in 20 years I can still post to F3 and keep up as well as you do.  I was shocked as you came flying past me during the final jail break.  Loved that you beat Dasher.

Finch was getting very close to having his Clydesdale card pulled the last couple of workouts.  He was approaching back of the gazel pack territory.  Good work lately Finch.

I thought Southern Belle and I were going to be the first ones there this morning.  As I round the corner into the school I see Mad Dog planting the flag in the ground.  Dude worked his butt off today.  Pushed through the full set of Maktar Jai’s even after I gave a chance for modification.  He even posted while on vacation – impressive.  Glad to have you as a site Q on Saturdays.  You and Popeye make a good team.

In case no one knew, Dasher is fast.  I tried my best to handicap him today, but to no avail.  He also pushed through the full set of Maktar’s.  Good work.



Third F opportunities:

Sunday 7:00 5 Stones Office building.  Studying the book of John.

Monday evenings @ 7:30 Brooklyn Pizza.  New book starting this week.  Come to get a copy of the book and drink beer with Shop Dawg.

Sandbox Fundraiser Pool Party June 8th @ Lawson Pool.  $40 per family.  Pizza and Beer provided.


A Clydesdale Call Out

Sixteen pax showed up for a Saturday morning beat down.  Four pax who have been MIA were called out on GroupMe and sent a personal invitation to join.  One accepted that invitation, though I think he regretted it soon after.


Warm Up

Mosey to top of parking lot.  I soon heard what I though was flat foot behind me, quick over the shoulder check, affirmative.

30 SSH

20 Mountain Climbers

10 Peter Parker Push Ups

10 Potato Pickers

Mosey to benches at school and partner up.

Partner 1: Derkins.  Partner 2: Run a Lap.  Transition was going to be a joint squat with your partner holding hands all the way down, but to the ground, then pulling on each other to help back up.  I attempted to demonstrate with Transporter.  It was not going as smoothly as I had hoped and as soon as I heard “why don’t you just kiss him” from the peanut gallery, I decided to change it up.  10 Squats to transition exercises.  2 Rounds.

Partner 1: Bench hop over.  Partner 2: Heels to Heaven.  Transition: 5 Push ups.  Some pax had great form (Cyrus).  Others didn’t quit grasp the up and over (I will leave those nameless but it rhymes with eagle room.) 2 Rounds.

Partner 1: 1 legged lunge on bench.  Partner 2: Run the loop.  No Transition.  2 Rounds.

Mosey to Rocks and grab a heavy lifting rock.

30’s (Curls) 10 bottom half, 10 upper half, 10 full curl.  Made sure to call out those that use the swing of their body to do a curl.  Wasn’t planning on calling anyone out but Bottle Cap stepped up and called himself out.

Military Press Ladder with a hold.  10, 9 + 1 second hold, 8 +2…..

Shoulders were burning so decided to throw in a quick mosey to the speed bump and back before starting next exercise.

Squat Ladder with a hold.  I was getting gassed.  Thanks to Recalculating for stepping in for a quick count while I caught my breath.

Mosey to back of school for Supine Ladder.  I had a quick thought of adding the hold in there, but that it would be too much.

Jailbreak to the short wall.

20 step ups, bear crawl to wall, 10 Mike Tysons, lunge walk back to wall.  Repeat for 3 rounds.  Time check – make that 2 rounds.  Time check again – yeah, we better mosey.

Mosey to Brick pile, wait gate is locked.  Posse said something about moseying around football and baseball fields…um, no.  Mosey back bast tennis courts.

Grab two bricks for shoulder work.  4 count front raise, down, side raise, down.  I think we did 20 of them?  Bricks down and do it again with no bricks.  For those questioning the counting…I just did it until it burned.  No rhyme or reason other than burn factor.

Lean over for reverse fly to work back deltoids.  Again, I think count was around 12, drop bricks and do until it burned.

Stay leaned over for tricept kick back.  12 with bricks.  another 12-15 without bricks.

Mosey through woods to parking lot.

Partner up for partner push (2 rounds), followed by partner pull (1 round).  Some how my partner (Run Flat) was stolen from me.  All good, partnered with Popeye.

T claps to the light pole and then jail break to the finish.

Ran (slowly walked) to get my phone and return to find the pax doing burpees.

Mole Skin

Great work today.  I had intended this to be a Clydesdale friendly workout (meaning less running, more lifting).  That being said, I was wore out by the end and breathing hard.

Thanks to Beltway for accepting the call out and showing up today.

Cyrus has been a great addition to the group.  Some young blood.  This was his 4th workout of the week.

It was good to see Transporter out at a WUC workout.  Always a positive attitude and pushes the rest of us to be our best.

Always enjoy seeing the 2.0’s come out.  Popeye’s boys are getting stronger.  Great to see their stamina improving with each post. (Now if they could just pass that on to their father – hey oh!).

On a related, but side note.  A big group at Coffateria today.  Ran into a recent FNG Wild Thing and his 3 girls.  Transporter went out of his way to introduce himself not only to Wild Thing, but also his girls.  Great to see the welcoming attitude and just general all around good spirit.  Hoping to get Wild Thing back out soon.

Also the power of F3 Networking was shown as we found out Cyrus is a welder currently in between jobs.  Several pax connected with him and potential opportunities/leads they might have.

Beat The Q

12 Pax came out to see if they could beat the Q and the Q was beaten quite easily.  In fact, the Q was beaten so bad, he had a lot more time left over at the end than he anticipated.  That made for some awkwardly thrown together exercises that were barked out between large gasps of breath.

Two FNG’s came out after months of EH’ing from yours truly.  The pamphlet created by Deflated was what pushed them over the edge to get out so a big thank you for the work that went into that.  It looks very professional, in fact – almost too professional for this rag tag bunch.  Welcome Wild Thing and Frozen.


Warm up

Mosey to Laundry Mat (I was told my opening pace was faster than they were use to out of me.  Apparently they were right because I was huffing and puffing pretty hard by the time we reached the laundry mat).

25 SSH

20 Opposite elbow mountain climbers

10 3-6-9’s

10 Potato Pickers


The Thang

Mosey to Animal Hospital.

10 Merkins at each station, 5 stations total for 50 total Merkins.  Finish with a final set of 20 T Merkins.  Key was to not let the Q beat any Pax.  If I did, we would redo the exercise.  Apparently Posse didn’t quite understand the meaning of Beat the Q.  I thought the whole time he was struggling like me, then he realized he had to beat me and he turned on another gear.  FNG’s were well ahead of me from the get go so no luck in catching one of them….looks like the Pax would be spared of repeating this exercise.

Rock Pile for a Heavy Lifting Rock

21’s (except they were 30’s). Curl bottom half for 10, top half for 10, full curl for 10.

Military Press Ladder with a hold – 10, 9 hold for 1, 8 hold for 2…..

Short Mosey to the hill for Triple Nickle (I think???)

10 Burpees at bottom of hill, run backwards to top, 10 Dry Docks.  Repeat for 3 rounds.  Another beat the Q exercise.  This time I did get close in beating Wild Thing (FNG), but the Pax started getting the hang of this working together to beat the Q game.  Foundation laid a couple of checks into the board to slow me down.  He must have been talking with Frozen (FNG) a former pro hockey player.

10 count by Posse then noticed that some of the Pax took their sweet time getting back to starting position from helping 6 in.  Money Ball for an additional 5 count.

Jailbreak to the Laundry Mat stop sign.  Another beat the Q game.  I was on the heels of a few of the guys the first 1/4 of the hill.  By the time I made it within reach of the stop sign I was gassed and most of the Pax had been there awhile.

Extremely slow mosey (in fact most would call it a walk) back towards the church.  Once I got my breath in check enough to talk I instructed 25 T claps as we walked.

Partner Up.  Partner 1 hold wooden fence for low slow jumping squat – 25 count.  Partner 2 In/Out Merkin  2 Rounds

Partner Leg throws – Left, Center, Right, Center was 1 round.  10 rounds total.  Damascus will be so disappointed to hear he missed a little man touch, even though it was only hands to shoes.  A sarcastic thank you to Mad Dog (my partner) for dripping sweat into my eye.  I admit I did an extra lean forward trying to aim mine, but I don’t think my aim is as good as his.  There is probably a really good joke here, but I will leave that up to the imagination in an attempt to keep this Back blast semi clean.

Quick watch check – 6 minutes left.  (I had counted on beating the pax at least one of the times we were racing)  What to do now with all this extra time……Mosey to Stop sign for suicides.  Beat the Q back in play.  Got close to Posse at the end, but he heard my footsteps and hit that extra gear again.

Watch Check 4 minutes.  Seriously!??  Lunge walk until I could catch my breath.

Watch Check 2 minutes.  Asked Posse to lead American Hammers while I grabbed my phone.  Deflated wrapped us up with Lolita’s.  Watch check 6:15.


Mole Skin

Thanks to all those that came out.  A big thank you to the 2 FNG’s that showed after months of me asking and pushing.  One told me he would come just so I would quit asking.  Hopefully he enjoyed enough to join us again.

Wild Thing named for his love of the Cleveland Indians and Major League being his favorite movie.

Frozen named because he was a former pro hockey player and his wife’s love of Disney.

I was told there were two Jingles sightings this week – yet the 1 day I show up he is nowhere to be found.  His shirt still rides in my car…..going on month 4 now.

Posse came in on two wheels.  Being the FNG whisperer, I pictured him in one of those old Folgers commercials – smells the FNG’s and hops out of bed tearing out of Lawson to make it to The Floater in time.  Posse, thanks as always for your leadership, kindness, and inviting spirit towards the new guys.

As we were doing name-o-rama there was a whole half of the group I didn’t realize was there.  I guess that’s what happens when you lead from the back.  Good work from Shampoodle and Loafer to not even be in my sights when I was trying to catch Pax.

If you liked the workout, I will be at it again at Weddington on Saturday.



Mad Dog collecting money for a not so secret Stub Hub baby gift from the F3 group.  He will be collecting money Friday and Saturday.  Thanks go his M for doing the dirty work and actually buying the gift(s).  We all know if it were left up to us they would be getting a box of diapers and a 6 pack of beer – well maybe 5 pack of beer.



Win or Lose, it was a valiant effort

Twelve pax came out to make an attempt on a calories burn count record of 668 set by Money Ball previously at The Floater.  The workout was built up as a bar hoping tour of Waxhaw and we ended up hitting the three big ones – Brewery, Maxwell’s Tavern, and Mary O’Neill’s.  At the time of this posting, it is not known if the record was actually broken, though initial feedback was that we were well short at 599 calories burned.  Whether the record was broken or not, I think we all got a good workout in.  Once again, The Hill proved to be the ultimate obstacle to kick our butts.



Disclaimer given.  Q requested that during in any down time or explanation pax keep moving by performing SSH.  Mosey to the Brewery.  Got there and decided that wasn’t far enough so we circled the block.

Circle up for:
25 SSH – halfway through quickly dive out of the way as a truck came plowing through.  (Thanks to those who yelled car as I didn’t see him until after car was yelled).

20 Opposite Elbow Mountain Climbers

15 Peter Parker Pushups

SSH while Q attempted to explain first round.


The Thang

Round 1:

Groups of 3 performing a rotation of 3 exercises for 3 rounds (no, I don’t have a thing for the number 3).

Derkins, Run the Bridge, Sitting squat on bench along with an air press.

Mosey to Mary O’Neills


Round 2:

Groups of 3, 3 exercises, 2 rounds.

20 One legged step up, Dips, Inch Worm Push Ups.

Mosey to Hill


Round 3:

Groups of 3, 3 exercises, 3 rounds.

Burpees at bottom of the hill, Runner up the hill, LBC’s round 1 & 3 at top of hill.  Carolina Dry Docks Round 2 at top of hill.

As the group finished up, I led the remaining guys at to top of the hill down to the bottom of the hill for one final surprise – except the surprise was on me……..


Round 4:

The first ever Burpee train was performed.  Since we were so far from the tracks, we had no idea when the train had passed.  I judged based on sound of whistle when it passed.  The first ever Burpee train lasted approximately 90 seconds, though I’m pretty sure had we been able to see the train it would have been much longer.

Some time was lost during Burpee train so we had to finish Round 4 fast…..Partner Push up the hill back to the cars, switching as you got tired.  I asked to pax to meet me at the speed hump only to realize the speed hump was only a few yards away from where we were, so I kept going to the next street light (with very little excitement from the pax).  My partner, Bottle Cap, seemed awfully concerned about time remaining.  I think he was paid off my the other pax to keep distracting me while they walked up the hill instead of partner pushed.  At 6:14 as we were nearing the final stop sign I signaled the end and asked that we jog it back in.  Arrived back to the cars right at 6:15.



Thank you to all that showed up today, even after multiple warnings that it was going to be tough.  I was worried after the first two rounds that it wasn’t as tough as I had hoped it would be, but I got a little help from the hill at the end.

Bottle Cap worked hard today and was as worn out as I have seen him in awhile.  Of course, that might have been because he had to push one of the biggest guys there today (me) up the final hill.

Money ball came out even after his surgery to remove the alien from his body.  While doctor said no upper body lifting (like push ups) he stayed strong and put in extra squats and running.  That being said, I’m pretty sure that thing is going to be infected now.

Nice to see Xerox and Button becoming dependable regulars at The Floater.  Good work today guys.

Frack seemed to be in extra modify mode today doing a ton of ab work in place of derkins, merkins, and dry docks.  I guess it was a heavy chest week already.

Spitz made an appearance though he left Cherry Picker at home.

Hooch stayed through COT today.  Still hungover from St Paddy’s he wasn’t quick enough to make that Irish Exit today.

I concluded “The Week of Fuse Box” today.  Thanks to those that joined one or all of the three workouts.  Hopefully you felt you got some good work in.  Thanks to the three AO leaders that asked me to lead this week.  I’m not sure if yall all got together and decided you were going to work me to death this week for fun, or it just worked out that way.  Either way, I survived (and as of yesterday was 3 pounds lighter for it).  Its amazing how much harder you push yourself when you are Q’ing.  Now its time for me to get back to the back of the line with the rest of the Clydesdale’s.



Third F opportunity on Sundays with Bottle Cap leading Bible Study.  New location this week at the smaller 5 stones building.  Meet at 7:00? (I forgot the time so check with Bottle Cap to be sure).  Frack sounded like he was going to be a definite show and offered to buy breakfast for everyone afterwards.  He really is such a nice guy.

Wait, it’s run heavy workout – from Fuse Box?

23 Pax came out to see if a Clydesdale could actually run a Gazelle style workout.  Much to the amazement of the pax and the Q himself, we all finished without a single incident.  Though there was plenty of mumble chatter and grumbling as usual.  I heard the usual call out from Frack – something about Yoga.  That was the last time I heard from him and the rest of the pax as we were all huffing pretty hard after that.  I will be crawling back into my cave for some hibernation and recovery as well.

We welcomed some new faces – FNG Fat Man; and some old faces – Turtle.  Both Posse and Bottle Cap represented the ACC well last night with convincing wins and showed up to brag about them.



Lap to the front of middle school.  Picked up two pax coming in on two wheels.

30 SSH

15  3-6-9’s

25 T Merkins

10 Potato Pickers



Mosey to hill at front entrance of high school and partner up.

Partner 1: run up hill backwards with 2 burpees at the top.  Partner 2: Merkins at bottom of hill.  3 rounds.

Mosey to front of middle school.

Partner 1: 1 legged step up, 15 each leg.  Partner 2: Heels to Heaven.  2 Rounds.

Partner 1: 1 legged derkin into a 1 legged lunge.  Partner 2: run a lap.  2 Rounds.

Mosey to Transporters Shed

Partner Push to the 2nd light, jog back to start and flap jack.

Inchworm push ups to first light then 5 Carolina Dry docks at each light pole to the end.

Merry at the start for abs: American Hammer, Heels to Heaven, WWII Sit Up’s



Another great group of guys today.  Thanks to Foundation for asking me to lead even after I asked “are you sure, I’m already teaching Friday and Thursday?”.

I set out to prove some folks wrong today – most notably myself.  I wanted to see if I could not only complete a Gazelle style workout, but lead one.  My apologies to my fellow Clydesdales, I will return back to regular form following up the rear again soon.

Bottle Cap EH’ed a new FNG out.  Welcome to Fat Man who gets his name both because his last name is Marvel, and his business competes with FatMan plumbing.

Welcome back out to Turtle.  We didn’t get a chance to meet, but it sounds like you have lots of dirt on some of these guys (or maybe its the other way around?) so hopefully you will be back out to share some of that wisdom.

Posse made it out even though he was sick.  It was apparent that he was under the weather from the start, though originally I just thought he was up late celebrating the Clemson blow out of Auburn (ACC! ACC!).  I myself was celebrating as well – an early exit for UNC.

Speaking of UNC – I somehow managed to lead a workout with both Carolina Dry Docks and Heels to Heaven in the same workout.  My Wolfpack brethren would be so ashamed.  I will do better next time.

Frack started out the partner push strong so I had to lock down and make him work.  He stopped at the first light and then realized he was only half way.  The final push was pretty weak.  I may have actually wore down the infamous Frack.  I will pause for his rebuttal that will most likely be filled with insults challenging my manhood and will leave me speechless and shocked.

A Welcome Spring Clydesdale Picnic

14 Pax came out to welcome in spring at a Clydesdale Picnic.  There was music, there was picnic tables, there was a lot of mumble chatter, and some groaning.  The groaning might have had something to do with our 4 respects that joined – or maybe the workout was a little more difficult as I had to work out my frustration from the Wolfpack losing yesterday.


Warm up

Lap around the parking lot then circled up.

25 Side Straddle Hops

20 In/Outs

20 T-Merkins

10 Potato Pickers



Mosey to third light to pick up a rock and circle up

21’s – except I decided to 30’s, and then decided to do a few more at the end.  10 bottom half curls, put rock down & rotate.  10 upper half curls (squeeze at the top), put rock down and rotate.  10 full curls, hold on number 10, then do 5 more just because.  Rocks down and rotate.

Military Press ladder with a hold – 1 press then hold for 9, 2 presses then hold for 8……

Squat ladder with a hold – 1 squat then hold for 9……  Lots of mumble chatter about not making eye contact with the person across from you and #2 innuendos.

Lunge holding rock over head for 1 light then mosey back to parking lot for station work.



Partner Push – timer


Picnic table runs

Curl/Press with a rock


Squat/Upright row with a rock

(3-6-9) I think this one actually ended up getting thrown out or skipped by most pax



Stations lasted approximately 30 minutes.  Grab rocks and do presses while we wait for the 6, then mosey back to third light to put rocks up.

Mad Dog led merry (marry? mary?) of heels to heaven while waiting on the 6.  I normally don’t approve of any workout that mentions the cheaters (Heels to heaven, Carolina Dry Docks), but I made an exception today.

Final round of chest exercises with another round of T Merkins and some regular Merkins mixed in with 6 inches.  By this point the groaning and complaining was loud, and it was 6:14.  Decidied to give them a break and mosey back to start to circle up.


Mole Skin

Another great workout with an even better group.  Thanks to Recalculating for offering me a chance to Q.  This is my first Q outside of Weddington HS.  I (think I) proved once again that you don’t have to run three miles to get your heart rate up and a good workout.  I know me and my partner loafer were huffing and puffing pretty good there – especially during partner pushes.

As usual, I mixed in some new exercises that increased the mumble chatter to near deafening levels.  Money Ball was there so that explains the record amount of mumble chatter. For those that have not done T Merkins before – the Army now uses them instead of regular push ups.  I figure if its good enough for the Army, its good enough for us.  Hopefully you enjoyed them.  I like them better because it forces good form, doesn’t allow you to cheat (I won’t call anyone out but we have several alligator arm merkins from the group), and adds some shoulder and back work in at the same time.  If your curious, there are a few articles out there on why the army switched to T push ups.  Here is one to start:

After back to back bear crawl heavy workouts, I delivered on my promise for no bear crawls – I think that is why Dough Boy decided to fart sack (that guy loves a good bear crawl).

Shout out to Hollywood who once again showed everyone up today by adding superman’s to the T Merkins.  I will apologize in advance to the other pax as I have a suspicion we may be seeing those at his next Q.

1 down, 2 more to go.  I will be Q’ing again Monday and Thursday next week (I will pause for the collective groan from the group).  I look forward to seeing everyone out there in the gloom next week!