Ever Given



Ever Given

This backblast was ghost-written by Hoover for Runstopper.  Why?  Because Flipper is a Disney princess and won’t let it go …

 

and Gummy is no longer on contract as Runstopper’s ghost writer so YHC was tapped in the dugout and pinch hit this one.

 

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to read this Rock Zero backblast, now posted so the world (and Flipper) can get on with their lives and harass other site Q’s to post backblasts for their Qs who didn’t.  We run a highly regulated, respectable, and tight ship here.  Your shenanigans should be memorialized in a backblast.  Not posting a backblasts subjects your site Qs to being harassed and in YHC’s case this will continue until Dora Qs Rock Zero this Saturday.  Another backblast won’t be written and somewhere around Wednesday of next week, YHC will be harassed, again, to commence with the mental exercise of writing a Pulitzer-prize worthy backblast.  This is the new normal.  #2020 is over, #2021 is here.

Like the Ever Given, finally freed from the Suez canal, the unclogging of a toilet of the mind, for the benefit of global F3 commerce.  You’re welcome pax for this fine literary masterpiece.  Of course, blaming YHC for not posting a backblast is like blaming, Marwa Elselehdar Egypt’s first female captain, for grounding a ship she never captained.  Geraldo and YHC are just the site Qs.  Like typical management, we own nothing but the blame and shame when something goes off the rails.  Rule #1:  Manage the chaos and keep your fingers crossed that everyone makes it out alive.

Rule #2, for the love of god, someone please WRITE THE DAMN BACKBLAST!!

 

But I digress, back to the workout.  7 men showed up to see what color tights Runstopper was wearing.  It was as usual, the burning question on everyone’s mind.  What color tights?  Vegas odds had neon yellow but the man chose black.  It was a good decision considering it was paired with a hi-viz running jacket.  So hi-viz that pax couldn’t look directly at him in the sunlight without burning a retina.  Kind of like looking at the sun during a solar eclipse. 

 

 

 

It was a smart clothing option.  Just not for after 0700 when the sun is up.  Pretty sure people driving on Rt 51 slowed down trying to understand what that blinding light was hovering 18 inches off the sidewalk being followed by 7 men in F3 black.  That thing was so hi-viz that if it was paired with the usual neon tights pax faces would have melted off like Paul Freeman’s at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark.

 

 

Where was I?  Oh yeah, the Thang …

Mosey out onto the front lawn of Calvary for a warmup.  Surprised we haven’t been banned from the front yard, yet.  But then again, the geese are allowed to crap all over that church so I guess we’re slightly less annoying.  After the warmup, mosey down to Davies park.  Fireman Ed was not impressed with the running, BTW.  Once at the park, do some Mary in the frost covered grass.  Head over to the soccer area where families were gathering for that Saturday ritual of watching their kids not be the next Mia Hamm or David Beckham but still cheering them on.  Grab a rock.  Stay socially distanced and do some stuff with rocks across the parking lot.  Hit the playground for 3 sets of merkins, pull-ups, and step-ups (they’re not little hazes because we weren’t at the Calvary Hot Box).  Back to the rocks (which we left in the parking lot for cars to run over, because this is not Calvary church) for some more parking lot shenanigans.  Mosey to the side road that leads to the dog park.  Mosey up to the middle light and split into two groups.  Some type of suicide was called with pax doing an exercise and running to each light with both groups going in opposite directions.  Cover every light then back to the frosty grass for some more Mary.  Finally an indian run back to Calvary for sprints to the end.

The Skine of a Mole:

Solid group of pax on Saturday.  YHC almost has them all posted here.  Almost.  In order to keep the HR files up to date, please sound off in the comments with the one pax YHC missed.  He wasn’t a regular and YHC has a bad memory for these things.

#Cotters to Fireman Ed for posting for the first time in a long time.  The last time I saw Fireman Ed, he was getting berated by Brown at Skunkworks.  You know, back when management made you run with a kettlebell.

For all my hating on Flipper, he has a point about backblasts.  Post them, they don’t have to be funny or even entirely accurate.  But post what went down and who showed up.  Your fellow pax will appreciate it and you won’t get called out by the porpoise with a purpose.  I’ll repeat this for your benefit, we run a highly regulated, respectable, and tight ship here.  Your shenanigans should be memorialized in a backblast.

SYITG

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Hoover author

Commonly mistaken for sasquatch

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