Baby, I’m a star(fish)

Baby, I’m a star(fish)

Six to seven hearty PAX Made a visit to one of Peak’s classic locales for a beatdown that can only be termed as “Old School Peak.” Why do we say 6 to 7? Read on …

YHC, Slim, Tweetsie, Smokey, Benny and Octane took off from the new launch point, which we will call the Back Alley and set out toward Peak’s classic launch point. Stopping off at the small shopping center with the compounding pharmacy to circle up …


  • SSH x20
  • IW x20
  • Windmill x20
  • Mountain Climber x20

After that, mosey behind to the FBC Matthews gym parking lot.

Time for a classic — the starfish …

The four corners:

  • Merkins x15
  • Wide-armed merkins x15
  • Diamond merkins x15
  • Carolina dry docks x15

Back at the middle, a twist: When you first come back, hold plank for a 5-count. After the next corner, 10-count. After the next corner, 15-count. After the final corner, 20-count.

We did that. Then it was round 2:

  • Lunges x15
  • Squats x15
  • Reverse lunges x15
  • Jump squats x15

Back at the middle, same routine, except hold a sumo squat for 5-count, the 10, blah blah etc.

After that, it’s time for a round of 7s. Starting off, it was 6 supine pull-ups at the bar, run down to the other end, 1 big-boy sit-up. Then 5 pull-ups, 2 sit-ups, you know the routine.

It was some time during the 7s that all of a sudden, Safelite appeared! It was pure magic.

Mosey over to FBC proper. Find some wall. Next up, two rounds of the people’s chair, with 50 arm-raises, civilian count.

Then some Mary — LBCs, flutter and Freddy Mercury.

Mosey back to launch, join up with Sparta for some box cutters, heels to heaven and protractor. Maybe some more stuff in there.


Counting, naming, Tweetsie with the takeout.


Benny is not doing some races, because there are no more races. He will share with you all of the races he is not doing.


First off, good to see Octane back for his second workout. You know, that second one is usually the hardest one. This is important because, well, hang on …

First off, Smokey pointed out that I was not in the middle during COP. I am a Q of the people. Let me stand with my comrades.

Okay, so, germane to Octane, as we approached the parking lot for the main thing, Benny, in discussion of races he is not doing, mentioned a race, maybe you’ve heard of it, called the “B. R. R.” So then Octane asks the magic question: What is that?

Needless to say, given the group’s composition, this was a mumblechatter gold mine. We noted that the lovely Blue Ridge Relay is a team relay race where you will see lots of lush scenery and enjoy only the finest luxe accommodations.

So yes, we lied. Well, lied is strong. We committed various sins of omission. Please see yourself to the nearest confessional booth.

During the starfish, Benny seemed to have problems with both the exercises called and the amount of repetitions for each one. He was vocal with these objections. He failed to realize that this was only adding to his agony, and the rest of us.

Safelite is a great BRR driver in that he has some sort of built in GPS, as there was really no other logical expectation for how he found us.

On the mosey back, Tweetsie and Smokey were having a theological discussion moving from the Acts of the Apostles to “Waterfalls” by TLC. Also, I showed off my great Biblical knowledge by quoting my favorite verse: “You shall not cast your visor on grass before referees.” It’s in there.

Strong showing all around, honestly. You know what you are going to get with these guys. Plus, getting back to the old favorites just felt good.

Sensei was missed. I don’t think he is missing us as he works on his tan.

Oh, and, stop me if you’ve heard this before — Slim knows people that you know as well. Turns out, he and Octane have some degree of professional cross-over. I still think it’s just because Slim knows everybody.

Finally, Benny claims he is going to show up to Skunk Works soon. He is required to alert both me and Tweetsie before this happens. If this happens, we will get the word out.

Oh, and finally finally, this week marked my four-year anniversary with F3. You guys got me through an extended period of joblessness, some bad football seasons, y’all picked me up on so so so many occasions and still continue to help me get better, in the many ways you can interpret that. You guys rock.

About the author

Lois author

You must be logged in to post a comment.