I pulled into Latin this morning about 5:20. Even though it was advertised Fast Twitch would converge with Swift this morning, there were 10ish cars already in the lot, meaning the thoroughbreds were surprisingly out there somewhere. I walked down to the track to see if they were running intervals or some such nonsense. They weren’t, however, the sprinklers on the football field were running. This presented a problem as I had a lot planned for that field today a la a mock NFL Mini Camp. As I wept and pouted walking back to the launch area, I tweaked my plan and greeted the 17 hearty studs who came ready to run the grid iron. I gave a quick disclaimer, thanked Hops for bringing a second football and off we ran to the track:
15 SSH (amazing how many men have joined the refusnik party on that exercise)
Mosey to the middle of the track for instructions on a Leatherhead Indian Run. We formed two lines. The first guy hands the ball to the second guy while running, the second guy passes it on behind him and so on. Last guy in line can’t run to the front until he gets the football. Also, if you fumble, your whole team does 10 merkins. Just to provide a demonstration, Geraldo decided to immediately pull an Earnest Byner and fumbled at the start. 10 merkins for that team. In hindsight, I think I may have made too much of an example of ole Geraldo. Mea culpa, brother! One lap later we stopped for BALL
So, here is my explanation of BALL! See if this makes sense! Two teams. Two guys from each team run up and down the steps of either side of the Hawk’s stadium. Whilst they run, their teammates perform one of four exercises….Burpees, American Hammers, LBCs or Lt. Dans. The timer for each exercise is the runner. The acronym is BALL to make it easier to remember. I don’t know if my instructions were too quick, if 5:40 A.M. is an awful time to be told to do anything, or if the average GPA of the two teams was equivalent to Blutarsky’s from Animal House, but somehow this $#^! got twisted. We finally figured it out on round two, so all was not lost.
One more Leatherhead Indian Run before heading to the Lacrosse Field:
We lined up at the goal line on the MAC side of the field. One man throws (although Spackler kicked…..kind of) the ball down the field. We drop for 10 of stated exercise on the goal line, run to the position where the ball landed and do 15 of the same, then run back to the baseline for 20. Puddin’ Pop threw a mediocre Trent Dilfer level pass right to the goal in front of us (don’t be sad about the Dilfer comment PP…..he has a ring after all!). We did Heals to Heaven to honor Puddin’s throw. Next was Revlon, who threw a Peyton Manning bomb which also ended up being the longest chuck. We did HR Merkins to praise Revlon’s certain HOF effort! Next came Spackler, who opted for the kick and engaged a Phil Dawson (Arizona) limp biscuit which landed about 25 yards ahead of us. It was kind of resting recovery! Flutters were the exercise de jour. Lastly, Leprechaun threw a respectable Boomer Esiason (lefty) worthy toss. We celebrated that one with CDD’s.
We did tunnel of love, with the “crawler” having to hold the football while moving through the tunnel. Lots of resistance on that one. I think half the dudes stood around for 10 seconds waiting to see if I was serious. I get it….artificial turf does burn. Semi Gloss stated “Hopper, you’ve been in F3 too long”!
We ended with 10 gassers with ten counts in between.
Mosey back to the launch site where Hops led the pax in some last minute Mary!
That’s a wrap.
We covered 2.02 miles a la my Garmin. I wasn’t sure how many miles we would pick up given so many exercises, so I was glad to crest two. Not sure everyone else enjoyed this workout, but I enjoyed drafting it. Thanks for humoring me boys! I think some of us were suffering from O2 deprivation by the end as several guys were having difficulty remembering the Proper Name-F3 Name-Age mantra during Name-o-rama. Truly great crowd this morning boys and thanks for being there. Go Clemson, Gamecocks, Tar Heels, Deacons, Buckeyes, Illini, Bama, Wolfpack and any other collegiate football favorites represented this morning!
Prayers and thoughts go out to Strange Brew who is recovering at Novant Matthews from a viral condition.
Purple Haze…..thank you for the closing prayer!
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