Dude, Where’s My Car?

Dude, Where’s My Car?

Man oh man, what freaking morning for my 16th Q. Planned out the weinke the night before like usual. Good solid idea on my iPhone knowing we would have packed house, I mean it’s Monday…..

Wife taps me on the shoulder at 5:18am and says, “aren’t you leading the workout this morning?” HOLY SHEET! Grab my pile of clothes, hop in the minivan and pulling out of the driveway at 5:20am. GPS says arrival at 5:34 and so I channeled my inner soccer mom with the driving skills of Dominic Toretto. All those years of watching the Fast and the Furious franchise would pay off in spades…

I arrived at 5:27 and what is happening? 4 people there? Lot seemed pretty full but everyone it seems was after Rubbermaid’s beatdown at Ignition. I mean I know it was cold but come on…

More brothers pulled up. DCCS reviewed. We gone!

THE THANG

Mosey to back of middle school and circle up:

1. 20 x SSHs IC

2. 20 x Squats CC

3. 20 x Imperial Walkers IC

4. 20 x Inclined Merkins CC

5. 20 x Carolina Drydocks CC

6. 20 x Jump Lunges CC

7. 20 x Derkins IC

Mosey to Basketball Courts, split into groups, plank bear crawl merkin ladder. 2 Merkins each until each person goes one time.

Mosey to the Shed:

• 25 x Bobby Hurley’s CC

• 25 x monkey humpers CC

• 25 x Squats CC

• Wall Sits:

Mosey to Circle:

1. 30 second side plank

2. 30 second side plank

3. 30 second elbow plank

4. 30 x LBCs IC

5. Lap Down to Circle & Back

6. 30 second side plank

7. 30 second side plank

8. 30 seconds of Makhtar N’Diaye

9. 20 x Pistol Right Leg LBCs IC

10. 20 x Pistol Left Leg LBCs IC

Mosey to the wooden benches. Team up and split:

• 150 x dips

• 100 x inclined merkins

• 150 x In & Outs

Mosey to portico and complete 20 x inclined shoulder taps or 40 x planked shoulder taps OYO. Head downstairs. Calf raises at each step and another 20 x inclined shoulder taps. Audible called due to time

Mosey past lunch tables to a nook. Was planning to do Jack Webb’s aka Icey Mikes. 1 x Mike Tyson and 4 x Speed skaters, to 10 & 40, but ran out of time. Moseyed back to cars….wait what’s going on?

60 seconds left and got a few more LBCs in while some questioned just what happened to all the cars. The end!

MOLESKIN

I’ve been planning this event in my head for probably about 6 months. We all just so kindly leave our keys on the seat, on a tire, etc. Rockwell reached out to me about Qing in the coming weeks and luckily April Fool’s Day was open and it was the perfect move to get the PAX away from the main lot.

I enlisted two trustworthy men with the high honor of missing a workout with the hope of passing on a good laugh to everyone. What we didn’t know is how long would it take to move all the cars and could they even find all the keys?

23 men posted this morning across Ignition and Flash, which is the lowest numbers I feel like in awhile. I know it’s cold but let’s lose that winter weight together brothers!

Back to WUC new valet service, it takes two men approx 19 minutes and they covered 2.3mi to move 19 of the 23 cars in the lot this morning. To those other 4 guys, where do you hid your keys? I don’t hear any “jingling” during the workout so I think we now all assume you guys are masters of the art of keistering. Google it or don’t.

I hope everyone got a good laugh about it this AM! All in good fun and to those that were upset/pissed/not entertained, I’m proud to share that Bottlecap has been antagonizing me for the last few hours. I wanted to believe he was paying it back to me but screenshots of a text thread and it seemed pretty real. The Cuthbertson Middle Principal had shared that the superintendent was in town and was none to pleased with all the cars in front of the school. Would I be the newest dumbass Damascus that would ruin a site for generations to come?

Luckily we may never know if it’s real or not, just so Bottlecap can hold this over my head. What we do know now is that the superintendent is an F3er and his name is Patches. Last name is O’Houlihan so a reference to the movie Dodgeball is amazing!

Major shoutout to my two brothers Dancing Bear and Deadwood for helping out with this practical joke. I brought up the idea over beers on Friday and they were immediately on board. We had some reservations about who might not giggle about it but since we are an equal opportunity organization everyone would be dealt the same deck. Except those that are “Trojan horsing” their keys. I have so many questions.

Beer on me if still none too pleased. Happy Monday and Happy April Fool’s Day boys!

Thanks to MB for taking us out

ANNOUNCEMENTS

• Posse has F3 stickers in his car, hope he finds it!
• Site Qs please see Mad Dog, he has reflective fanny packs waistbands as we continue to be safer in 2019!
• Doughboy has Watchtower tomorrow!