A strong quorum of 22 pax rolled out either to fulfill New Years resolutions, or they were lured under false pretenses that they’d be supporting YHC in his VQ. Either way, the environment was festive, largely because Cheese Curd offered to do a Flashdance performance when asked about his legwarmers (don’t tease me, bro!) Speaking of Curd, he won the Eskimo award by dressing more appropriately for a snowmobile tour than a bootcamp workout, but whatever. The boyz looked chilly, so off we ran…

Arrived at the turf unscathed (though we could’ve used nightvision goggles to navigate the bleachers), and searched in the dark for Surprise #1. It was at this point, 2mins into the workout that Gummy yelled out “the wheels are coming off, Sprockets!” (Thanks for the vote of confidence.) Then I located it… a rusty old football gauntlet last used by the OP Elementary PeeWee league of ’72. We singled up, gained some speed, lowered our shoulders and plowed through it like Chris Farley through a coffee table (or it least some of us did… the ones with pelotas).

Circle up!

  • 50 SSHs in exponentially accelerating fashion
  • 20 IWs
  • 20 LSSs
  • The “Merkin Surprise”… an experimental pyramid of merkins and planking 1…7, 7…1 = 56
  • Flutter? (30)

Then I made more friends… 10 burpees OYO, followed by a pass through the rusty gauntlet and run back to plank

30 Rosalita

10 burpees OYO, followed by another pass through the widowmaker

Mosey down south across Rea to the corner of Windy Rush and something.

Plank it up for shoulder taps

Partner up… run the block. Upon encounter, Partner 1 does 15 big boy situps, Partner B planks on partner 1’s feet. Run back to start and flapjack.

Plank for hip touches (your OWN hips, Puddin’ Pop!)

Partner up… run the block. Upon encounter, Partner 1 does 15 derkins atop planking partner. Run back to start and flapjack.


Run to the church, grab a 20-rep rock, carry overhead to assigned line.

Lunge walk with rock across parking lot to the grass.

  • 20 curls IC
  • 20 rows IC
  • 10 thrusters OYO

Lunge walk with rock back across parking lot

  • 20 curls IC
  • 20 rows IC
  • 20 thrusters OYO
  • Deposit the rock

Run back to the Eastsiiiiide (motel) of the school and find some wall.

  • Chair with 30 air presses
  • BTTW …. Hold…. Hold…. 20 toe taps. Recover.

Return to start.


  1. Spackler and Semi-Gloss were not present to complain about the absurdity of the gauntlet, but thankfully plenty of other pax were. However, One Eye and Runstopper hit that mutha like a boss!
  2. Scratch n Win, per your request, I still owe you the name of my coke dealer.
  3. Hopper’s reckless abandonment of Grecian Formula is praiseworthy. Lookin’ good!
  4. Jet Fuel, thanks for canceling your 3rd trip of ’19 to Bahrain to be a part of the festivities.
  5. Queen continues to try out for the next Rocky movie with his dark training sweatsuit. Solid.
  6. Great to see guest appearances from Baywatch, Tilda, and others. You’re always welcome at Hydra.
  7. Lewinsky is on Q next week, and he verbally promised twice the enthusiasm of YHC
  8. Formal respect to Fry Daddy, but all pax get my respect for showing up this morning. It was a pleasure to suffer with you all.
  9. Flipper, thank you for the solid sendout.


  1. QSource:  6:30am Thursdays at Eggs Up Café… studying Language of Leadership. Multiple other locations on various days and times studying same material. Contact Flipper for details. Come one, come all.

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Sprockets author

3 Comments so far

GummyPosted on1:31 pm - Jan 11, 2019

Solid Q Sprockets – well worth my monthly membership (which I assume Baracus is still passing along to Treasurer Haze). I normally tone down the witty banter for such a new Q as yourself, but you’ve asserted your dominance quickly at Hydra, so I didn’t hold back. As we were running through the minefield that is the OP AO, Fry Daddy told me that a Metro guy broke his leg running through similar terrain last week. Awesome. Just when you thought that AO couldn’t get any more dangerous, they bring in piles of gravel, dig more ditches and block the road.

I’m glad to see you embrace the Mike-Myers-as-Sprocket origin story, even though I think your name was bestowed based on bike sprockets.

Cheese Curd and I are running the 9-miler at the CRC Trail Race at the USNWC next weekend. It’s a great race – sometimes called the “Hoodie Race” because they give out sweet hoodies instead of tshirts. It’s a great run. Register by tomorrow to be guaranteed a hoodie (https://crctrailrace.racesonline.com/). As a bonus, you can ride to the race with us.

HIPAAPosted on8:35 pm - Jan 11, 2019

Look, if an F3 workout was led by Richard Simmons, it would have looked a lot like this. Energy level was off the charts, my brother!

Lots of grumbling as we moseyed to the grass field which was covered in a frozen dew frosting of some sort. Very little grumbling as we headed towards the tackling gauntlet (mostly because (i) no one could see it coming, (ii) it was completely unexpected, (iii) everyone thought Sprockets was joking. No, no he wasn’t.

Tclaps to Runstopper for coming out even though he had clearly been lifting weights all week long.

Puddin Pop admitted he got a little too close to me during BOM. I actually didn’t notice. That’swhatshesaid.

Very, very solid third VQ. Looking forward to the next VQ.

HopperPosted on8:48 pm - Jan 11, 2019

In the words of Pantene, “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful”, Sprockets! Solid Q, bro!

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