“I expect no burpees and no running on the grass since I wore my nice sneakers!”

“I expect no burpees and no running on the grass since I wore my nice sneakers!”

The above words were quoted to me by Purple Haze as I was lacing up for my lead at 5:29.  Given Haze’s gubernatorial (that’s gubernatorial, not goober-natorial) status within A51, the pressure was already high and intense!  Via TwitterFace, I let the pax know we would be travelling this morning.  I then quickly disclaimed the 16 men who showed for the Anvil hump-day workout and off we went!

Warm -up:

Mosey to the front courtyard of Calvary.  15 IWs and 15 LSSs.  Runstopper tried to throw off my count, but he didn’t know I already had a cup of coffee and was sharper than I looked.

The Thang:

Jog to the front entrance of that swanky neighborhood across from Calvary.  We played Frogger by crossing Hwy 51 at a non-intersection, but it helps when there is no traffic at 5:33 A.M.  Stopped for Peter Parker on the way to the ominous Five Knolls hill.

Five Knolls:

At the bottom of the hill, I explained we would be running the “triple-triple”.  Five monkey humpers at the bottom of the hill and five jump squats at the top.  Run the hill three times.  I’m going to be honest, the hill seemed less steep when I drove it in my cozy car yesterday.  Couple of Mary exercises at the top of the hill to let the pax (mainly me) catch our breath.

We made our way back to Calvary a la a stop at one of the intersections for Parker Peter.  Hammer also veered off to complete an OSHA audit of one of the construction port-o-john’s.


I want to thank Gummy for politely and eloquently reminding me this exercise is called Grinders (scratch that, he degraded  me and made me feel small, but he was right that I could not remember the name of the exercise).  We  counted off in three’s in the front lot of Calvary and ran grinders while tackling the following exercises:

  • Regular/Garden Variety Merkins
  • Heels to Heaven
  • CDDs
  • Wide Arm Merkins

Two cop cruisers were sitting in the parking lot while we did the grinders.  I am surprised none of the pax were arrested as several of us were firing off air biscuits like we were the Hatfields.

Hot Box:

Three rounds of 10 step-ups, 10 dips, 10 derkins

Wall Time:

Alternating wall sitting with both arm raises and Frankenstein style while breaking to run AYG 50 yards or so to a street light and back.

Finish up with a Native American run and one last 50 yard AYG stretch back to our cars.

That’s a wrap!


We covered 3.25 miles this morning and A LOT of that was uphill!  We also got in a fair amount of upper body and core work in along the way.  Strong work men!  The mumblechatter this morning was abundant and awesome.  We had the primary instigators of Spackler, Gummy and Runstopper, but it was all welcomed and would be disappointing without it, frankly.  Interesting things we learned this morning: 1) Purple Haze owns more shoes than Melania Trump, 2) Spackler will be attending Orange Theory instead of F3 when he visits Nashville as he thinks his workout partners will be more qualified at OT, 3) In 2018, Hammer has yet to not visit a port-a-john while posting, 4) Runstopper’s Freshmen year roommate had awful hygiene problems and 5) Lorax does not need to use his arms to pick himself up from the ground after completing an exercise….he uses flatulence power instead.  Feel free to use any of these topics as good cocktail party ice breakers!

Lorax, thanks for the opportunity to Q this morning and Hops, thanks for the prayer and take-out!


  • Keep an eye and ear out for news on social media on how F3 will be helping Florence victims in the near term.
  • Keep Buckeye and his family in your prayers.  His family had a tree fall on their home during the storm.  Volunteer efforts to help him with clean up are in the works.
  • Lorax is accepting Q sign ups for Anvil for any dates after 10/15.
  • Dredd is speaking tonight at Myers Park CC from 6:00-8:00 regarding Leadership and Sacrifice.

About the author

Hopper author

5 Comments so far

GummyPosted on12:31 pm - Sep 19, 2018

I see Hopper was excited to have some “work” to do this morning as his sabbatical winds down – very quick on the backblast. Do you think he got all dressed up in his banker’s uniform before writing this? I think he did.

Solid Q, Hopper. Sorry for holding up the launch by 30 seconds – I tried to maximize time for my pregame routine which, for the first time in 5+ years of F3, was incomplete. I was keeping an eye out for portajohns myself, but the Code Brown never struck. I was next to Brushback on the way down 51 – once we passed the normal crossing point to Five Knolls, we thought we were in the clear. Alas, I was wrong. That hill is terrible. I had to apologize to Haze for hurting his feelings at Fast Twitch yesterday. He caught me at a bad time.

    HopperPosted on8:41 pm - Sep 19, 2018

    I also woke up my kids up from their day off of school and held a faux sales meeting before writing the blast. I just don’t want to get out of practice, you know?

    I am admittedly AMAZED you made it through the workout without an “incident”. I’ve lived in a van with you for 30 hours twice over and your “pregame routine” is more regular and expected than Trump tweeting in the morning!

HopsPosted on1:05 pm - Sep 19, 2018

I, too, did not complete my pregame prep this morning. Apparently, Hammer never does but being in the construction business – he has a keen eye for porta-jons. He availed himself of one at HN yesterday…or was it last week? Probably both as noted by Hopper.
Asked Slumdog whether he preferred Slumdog or Strategery. He answered “Slumdog”; thus, we should call him “Strategery” from henceforth.
Cocoa was getting after it. So was Spackler, when he felt like it…which was sporadically at best.
Most telling comment of the morning came from Cottonmouth when we got to the top of Five Knolls. He simply said, “Are you serious?!” Yes. Hopper was serious.
Kotters to Dory — great to have you back out with us. He was out front, no change there.
Link to RSVP for “A Discussion on Sacrifice” with Dredd and Navy Seal Chad Williams: https://www.paperlesspost.com/flyer/go/Zbv7KrKFDpL6l5ipWM8b

MermaidPosted on4:45 pm - Sep 19, 2018

Would have preferred to have missed the tweet about going off campus last night. Knew what was coming and have not missed Five Knolls, especially since I have stopped “running” in November and took a week off during the storm. Needless to say, that hurt. Glad to get out though. Great to have Dory join us. It’s only taken me two-ish years to make it happen. Maybe next week too. He’s still in solid shape. Hammer was crushing it on the hill this morning. Glad to see Coco back out and get a chance to talk with Slum Dog. Haze feels he has to introduce himself each time he sees me now. Working on getting into a regular routine. Solid Q Hopper

You must be logged in to post a comment.