CerberU.S.A

CerberU.S.A

Fact of the day: July 6th is Sylvester Stalone, George W Bush, and Nancy Reagan’s birthday.

Not sure why we didn’t sign the Declaration 2 days later. Regardless, the PAX gathered to celebrate and this is what happened:

The Thang

• Disclaimer was given for those in attendance and Nemo was lightly accosted for taking too long to finish putting on his make up after being late by 30 seconds or so. Ironically, the FNG was not present for the disclaimer…which raises the question, if a disclaimer is given and there’s no FNG around to hear it, was a disclaimer given?
• Mosey past ye old Ale House, up the road to the mini-roundabout, and back to the pee pad turf.
  • 20 IC: IW’s, LSS
  • 10 OYO RDL’s (each leg)
  • Domino (PAX planks in a circle, then goes to R arm high. Q drops to do 5 merkins, stays in plank while the next PAX follows suit, then next PAX, etc. Looks like falling dominoes. During the explanation of a guy dressed to workout appeared from the general direction of Ted’s and asked to join. The more the merrier. R&R with L arm high.)
  • Febreeze (Found this gem in the Exercon. Kinda like Jack Webb, but somehow almost suckier. Ration 1:10 of WWII situps and air presses, the kicker being you hold a V position [6″ with your torso up as well] whilst pressing air. Plan was to climb then descend from 5:50, but Alf’s complaints were starting to wake up the guests at the Hilton, so audibled to nix the descent.)
• Mosey to tha deck, take the stairs to the top floor.
  • Chedder Shredder (if you don’t know about it, ask Nemo. He introduced it to YHC at Centurion many moons ago and YHC brings it out almost every time YHC has a Q. But be sure to give Nemo credit, he was slightly miffed until YHC alerted the PAX of his contribution. There was even a bit of mascara running down his face from tears of anger.)
• Mosey down deck, people’s chair to gather and give instructions
  • Rocky IV (Since there aren’t many good workouts associated with Bush or Mrs Nancy, we performed a little routine inspired by Stallone’s training montage in Rocky IV. Since we didn’t have a snow covered mountain, and doing sit-ups off a 10′ high ledge would, YHC is sure, nullify any kind of disclaimer given, the pax instead did the following to pay homage:
    • AYG up the slope (Mtn sprints)
    • 5 pullups at the top of the slope, mosey around to start of next slope
    • 5 hanging leg raises (in lieu of the ledge sit-ups)
    • R&R to the top, then people’s chair followed by 5 IC thigh taps on the wall.
    • Plan was to potentially R&R, but nah due to time and suckage.
• Mosey back down, doing leg raises and pullups along the way in same routine as Rocky IV. LBC’s to gather 6.
• Partner up and mosey back to launch parking lot via north entrance. Cue customary heckling (between PAX) of Gladiator, primarily focused on how F3’s membership rate is much better than theirs. However, they do have music.
  • Parking Ladder (P1 runs to stop sign by Chipotle and back while P2 does burpees at every parking space line in pattern of 1,2,3,4,etc. Flip flop and carry on my wayward son. Plan to go to 20, believe Larry Birds made it to 18 before YHC stopped us at 6:10. In hindsight, we should have just finished them. Cobains.
• Mosey through Micky-D’s/Panera lot and return to launch.
  • Touch your toes, R over L, L over R, bilateral quad stretches (stretching is good for you, even if it’s not Blakeovery, Gumby, or whatever the hell Pokey is supposed to be.)
  • Nose Wipers (merkin where you touch both hands with your nose prior to coming back up. 10 OYO)
  • 6″ till 6:15.
• El fin.

The Skine:

Our FNG actually ran into is 3-4 weeks ago while he was running around the Novel Providence apartments. McGee yelled some sort of invitation to join (which, if his pickup lines in college were of similar quality, I’m not sure how he got his wife to marry him), and he finally showed up this morning. Absolutely loved having him join us, named Snyder due to his (unfortunate) affinity for all professional DC teams after having lived there for a while. Welcome.

Solid effort by everyone today. Average age of attendance pulled south by 14yo Epsilon and Nemo, potentially giving Joust a run for its money as the youngest AO.

Some PAX endorses witnessing children and not just dogs urinating on the pee pad.

Also, YHC votes we get a cool flag like Gladiator.  #swag.

Announcements:

Useless to say at this point, but Epsilon has his VQ at Commitment.