Andy crawled to freedom through 500 yards…

Andy crawled to freedom through 500 yards…

We’ll get to the title of the backblast later, but first let’s address a seeming oxymoron / paradox / bit of irony:

Cerberus Q for the morning – Kirk

Kirk, known for not venturing too far outside his ankle monitor limit at Hwy 51, was the Q at Cerberus, which is south of 485.  Sadly, YHC actually looked to see if it was south of Myrtle Beach, which remains my southernmost post in 6+ years of F3.

So yeah, it happened.  Go ahead and drop the Journeyman (yep, looked it up) Award in the mail.

After a remarkably brief seven mile drive in (maybe 10 minutes), YHC arrived at 0523 to find 4-5 others in the parking lot of Viva Chicken – Waverly.  Transporter was drinking coffee, which seemed an odd choice.  Bets were made as to the side effects.  McGee ran in – questioned YHC’s attendance, more cars arrived, fist bumps, stretches, etc.  Short disclaimer given, and launched at 0530.

Warm up mosey down some street to another street with under construction townhomes and a roundabout (realize this narrows it down) beside a retention pond (ah, yes…that one).  Obligatory COP of SSH, IWs, and Mtn Climbers.  Unnamed street is a bit of a hill, maybe 150 yards in length.  Run down, 5 burpees at the bottom, 5 more at the top – 5 times.  McGee and Laronda were the Larry Birds of the group, one of whom did actual burpees.  The other more cavalierly flung himself to the ground, but the jump at the top was sublime.  Reckon someone with catlike reflexes could slide a sheet of 24 lb paper under the soles of those shoes.  Anyway, as an opener, this always delivers a swift kick to the nuts.

Mary to regroup – something from McGee, toe tap LBCs from Laronda, and Freddy Mercury from YHC, including a “half-way-there” that garnered applause and adulations, or something.

Mosey past the apartments and HUB to the parking deck.  Bit of meandering to find the right overhang for pull-ups, but the group arrived safely on the 2nd floor of the deck for a little of the original “Magnificent 7s” thrown out at Casbah a few years back, which thanks to Starfish, has now made it all the way from Winston-Salem to F3Austin.

14 burpees
21 merkins
28 squats
35 LBCs

Normally run a lap, but in this case, take the stairs to the top (unfortunately way shorter than a lap).  Original call for 4 sets, audibled to 3.

Recovered back on level 1 with more Mary – flutters, Boone LBCs.

And then, on the mosey out of the deck….it happened.  Dude was “cleaning” out a row of port-a-johns on the backside of the parking deck, and…well, Red says it better:

“Andy crawled to freedom through five hundred yards of shit-smelling foulness I can’t even imagine- or maybe I just don’t want to. Five hundred yards… that’s the length of five football fields; just shy of half a mile.”

Fortunately, there was no crawling, and it was maybe 50-100 yards…but the sentiment remains the same.  Bad doesn’t begin to describe it.  Words are just insufficient.  We stopped in front of the HUB building just to breathe again.

But we had 10 minutes left – not enough time for the original plan, but enough time for a short modification of it.

(This AO is great.  Tons of stuff around, but also dense (more the hotel and apartments – lot of people)…unlike, say Uptown at 0530.  BUT, it seemingly lacks a short steep hill in close proximity to launch, unless you count 485 exit ramps, which seemed a little too dangerous at 0530, mostly dressed in black.  Someone needs to find a safe one.  Anyway, close parenthetical thought…)

Mosey back past Viva to the Panera end of the parking lot, which does at least slope upward toward Viva.  Mini version of Quadzilla:

Backwards run “up” to a solitary, sad, small tree.  5 jumping lunges each leg.  Run “down” for 5 squats.  Repeat 5 times.

Mosey back to Viva, and as McGee adroitly pointed out, we were 8 burpees shy of 100, so finished with 8 burpees OYO.  Fin.

COT – McGee took us out.


  • Pool party tonight at Lawson (?) pool – L off Hwy 16 onto Culbertson (Cuthbertson?), look for the shovel flag.  Bring $40.
  • F3 Dad’s going on tomorrow at multiple locations.  Find one – good way to kick off summer with the kids
  • F3 Sandbox looking for folks to help move a family (single mom, grandmother, and two kids) on Sunday.  Ping Transporter.
  • BRR training is officially “on” as both Ghost Runner at Vintner’s (Arbo) and Cuda Run at Brixx (Foxcroft) on Thursdays at 1930.


Gents – appreciate the hospitality this morning.  Enjoyed the trip south, which remarkably took about as long as winding through Foxcroft to Sharon for Casbah or running over to Charlotte Christian for Joust.  This is a really good AO with a lot of possibilities.  We covered significantly less ground than most Metro / DMZ workouts, but hopefully everone got their $$$s worth.  One of the interesting things with public Q sign-ups is that you may have an interloper volunteer to Q, so with that in mind, direct all complaints to Alf.  Oh, and apologies to the lone missing Pax from the Pax list.

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1 Comment so far

McGeePosted on7:18 pm - Jun 8, 2018

AYE. We’re going to invite you back out to Southland just so you can write excellent backblasts like this one. And, for the record, it was me doing the #realburps, not Slowranda.

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