Monthly Archive May 2018

Cinco de Mayo y Cincuenta cumpleaños

Nine men joined cul-de-sac on Cinco de Mayo to test my leadership skills for my 50th birthday.

The Thang

For warmup…

15 windmills

15 cherry pickers

15 hill-billies

After a light stroll to the other end of the parking lot, we lined up to loosen up some more:

carioca — down and back

high knees — down and back

but kicks — down and back

shoulder shredder line with a hand-slap merkin

Mossie down to the next parking lot, but called a slalom audible because of random cones set up for the PGA shuttle parking lot.  Took a slight turn to complete 15 wall climbs.

The PAX moved on to Ben Nevis hill where C-SAC laid down a challenge to place no worse than 5th.  I was easily beat to the top by Cheddar, Doc, Nard-Dog, and Mic Check.  I was lucky that MT did not challenge, as I was out of gas.

We rejoined the rest of the Pax half-way down the hill and moved to the guardrail for a 1:5 ladder of Jack Webb, 25 dips and 15 one-leg squats (each leg).  From their, we worked down the sidewalk with a merkin progression at each lamp-post.

On to the (dried up) fountain for some more dips and incline merkins.  We continued to the parking deck for mule kicks and rounds of Mary.

We ended on the south-west corner of the stone hedge for bear-crawls and step-ups.  Mic Check helped out with some additional exercises, and MT called for a slalom race through the trees.

Back to home.


During the Ball of Man, C-sac thanked our heavenly father and the founders for the good brought into our lives through F3.  Being a day of celebration, we raised a round of Tequilla shots/beer chasers for Cinco de Mayo and my luck to live 50 years.  I am grateful for the renewed physical strength, new friends and sense of purpose and community.

Thank you for the birthday wishes.


Sorry, I forgot them, the Tequilla had already gone to my head.


Sanka very much


Run lap around track

SSH x 20

IW x 20

10 Burpees


The Thang:

Partner up


P1 – runs to top of steps, 5 pull ups on playground

P2 – merkins at bottom to 100 combined


P1 – runs to top of steps, 5 jump squats

P2 – LBCs at bottom to 150 combined


P1 – runs to top, 5 Russian twists

P2 – decline merkins to 100 combined


P1 – runs to top of steps, 5 squats

P2 – flutters at bottom to 100 combined


P1 – runs to top, 5 lunges

P2 – incline merkins to 100 combined


Jog a lap around the track


Line up in endzone


Sprint to 10, 30, 50

R Karaoke to 10, 30, 50

Backwards jog to 10, 30, 50

L Karoke to 10, 30, 50

Sprint to 10, 30, 50


Mosey to Grandma


25 LBCs at bottom, run to top and back, repeat

25 flutters at bottom, run to top and back, repeat

25 dolly at bottom, run to top and back, repeat

25 rosalita at bottom, run to top and back, repeat


Indian Run to front lot








We covered a good bit of ground today – not sure of exact mileage, but a lot of elevation gains between stadium steps and Grandma. Great work by everyone!

Thanks for the opportunity to lead. Always an honor.

Pre-blast for “Operation Supply Line” #3rdF

My 2.0 “Bellyflop” is doing a National Honor Society project for school and he wanted to help our F3 brother “Donut Hole” who is getting ready to deploy with his Army unit. We will be collecting supply items to ship to him and his unit for the deployment.

We are hoping to do more than one shipment, the first while he is still in the states and the second once we have an address overseas.

I plan on shipping the first round the week of 5/14 to the base he is stationed at in the states.
So if you would like to donate you can get things to myself by Sunday 5/13.

Either meet up with me at an AO, message me on Slack/Twitter/Facebook to meet up, or I am on Q at #F3Outland on Saturday 5/12.

Alternately if you post to a workout with Glass Joe or Madison they can also take the items and pass them on to me. (Thanks guys!)

So what are we collecting?
These are some requested items:

  • Letters or notecards of support/prayer
  • Packages of trail Mix (Individual packages)
  • crackers (Individual packages)
  • Fruit snacks
  • Water enhancers like Mio/Propel etc.
  • Toothbrushes/toothpaste
  • Baby wipes (no babies involved, this is due to the desert heat they will deal with and hygiene)
  • If you would like to donate some money to help with shipping (or for us to get items that may not have been donated) that would be helpful also.

Anything helps and if nothing else say a prayer for the safety of our brother and his unit and comfort for their family during the deployment.



Hair Band

Back to School

7 men kicked off their Cinco de Mayo celebrations with a trip down memory lane and took it back to high school.  We were joined later by additional revelers, but more on that later. Here’s what went down.

The Thang

Left launch at CFA and moseyed over to the playground at Blakeney for COP.  There we circled up and numbered off 1’s and 2’s.

15 SSH and 15 IW’s in cadence

1’s hit the bars for 10 overhand pull ups while 2’s did 10 merkins

Back in circle for 12 Peter Parkers

2’s hit the bars for 10 overhand pull ups while 1’s did 10 merkins

12 Mtn Climbers

1’s 10 pull ups and 2’s 10 merkins

12 Parker Peters

2’s 10 pull ups and 1’s 10 merkins

All warmed up we moseyed down Ardrey Kell swinging behind the Amazing Lash Studio, not to make our lashes amazing but rather to make our upper bodies amazing.  Partnered up with 1 lifting rock between.  In total partners were to get 100 curls, 100 overhead presses and 100 tricep extensions.  P1 does lifting exercise while P2 runs to mailbox at end of parking lot, does 10 wide arm merkins and back.  Flapjack until all totals are hit.

This was knocked out no problem so we continued down Ardrey Kell stopping at a guard rail for some rail sit.  We grabbed some rail and did civilian count 55 presses in honor of May 5th.  Continued on until we got to Ardrey Kell High.

Since the trip was a little on the longer side we hit our six on the grass and did some called Mary by the various PAX: dying cockroach (Escobar’s favorite), box cutters, Freddy Mercury.  On our feet and over to the circle courtyard at AKH.  Partner back up for a total of 100 dips, 50 derkins and 50 incline merkins.  P1 does called exercise while P2 runs a lap around the courtyard and then flapjack until totals are hit.  After we finished this I remembered an exercise that I wanted to do after Mary so moved back to the grassy area for a round of bear crawl banjo.  The way this banjo is played is the PAX circle up in plank facing outwards.  First out of the gate does 3 merkins and then bear crawls around outside of circle.  Once the guy to your left starts bear crawling you do 3 merkins and bear crawl out trying to catch the guy(s) in front of you.  If you get passed then down for a merkin.  This continues around the circle until everyone has gone and back to their starting spot in plank.  Oh and while planking you have to do 1 merkin every time someone bear crawls in front of you.  The guys did a great job with this one.  It was sucky enough with 7 guys but is a real smoker when you have about 20+ PAX and a large circle.

Moseyed back to launch stopping at our guard rail for another rail sit with 55 overhead presses (this one I felt much more than the one heading to AKH). Continuing on down Ardrey Kell we stopped at a light for merkins while the six caught up.  Got to launch with a couple minutes to spare so hit our six for a final Mary of Rosalita x15 IC and frogstomp x15 IC.  COT and announcements.


Great work this morning by the group.  My goal was to go with a good final landing spot in AKH with some pain stations in between that would really focus on the upper body (think very, very mini Southern Discomfort).  I think that I heard that we got in 4 miles in which was more than I planned for or expected seeing as when I measured from Blakeney to AKH it was about 1.2 miles.  But with the running during exercises it came out to about 4.  Thanks to all for really busting it because we had to keep it moving in order to get it all in an hour.  Hopefully after posting you felt that you could enjoy Cinco de Mayo and all the food and drink guilt free.  Special thanks to Mighty Mite for the history lesson on Cinco de Mayo and that it is not actually the Mexican Independence Day.  Rather it celebrates a Mexican defeat of France in battle.  Either way its a good reason to celebrate in May.

Once we got back to launch we noticed that there was a group of F3 runners that had just finished up.  Ed note; I guess runners at Bagpipe are Swifters then these guys at Davinci are Drifters?  Anyway we folded in with them for COT and announcements.


  • Bring a FNG day at Cerberus May 11th.  5:30 at Waverly.
  • F3 dads starting up June 9th.  9:00 at the Bull Ring.
  • Savage Race May 19th

Thanks to Bucky and Fredo for the opportunity to lead.


The Evolution of Jack Web

15 PAX showed up at to Commitment on a warm Saturday Morning.  The unsuspecting motley crew of F3 members was ready for a great workout.  FuseBox brought a new FNG to the group.  Although many are suspect of the FuseBox padding his stats by bringing a lot of one and done’s to the point there have been requests for his name to be changed to Calipari, the king of one and done.  Welcome back Jenner.  Welcome Stacey Jarvis aka: Southern Belle.

Image result for MEme's of southern belles

Quote of the Day from Transporter: “You have taking this to a new level of suck”

Alt Quote of the Day from Finch: “What was in the Ibuprofen you took this morning?”

Down to Business:


  • Mosey  a lap around the parking lot and down to the bus parking lot.  Wait a few while Bread Bowl catches up
  • SSH x 25
  • Imperial Squacker X 20
  • Plank Jacks X 25
  • Mountain Climbers X 25

The Thang

  • Jack Web 1 Tricep Extention to 4 overhead presses
    • Grab a reasonable Rock
    • Jack Web 1 Tricep Extension to 4 overhead presses
    • Pray you chose the correct rock size
    • Only the the power of the Q enabled survival
    • Finish at 10 tricept extensions and 40 overhead presses
    • Carry your rock to the top parking lot
  • Jack Web Running to Curl
    • Run down to the second speed bump and select another rock
    • Run 1 length between the speed bumps to 4 curls
    • Pray you brought your running shoes
    • Finish with 10 laps between the speed bumps and 40 curls
    • Mosey to the practice football field
  • Jack Web Bear Crawl to Pushups
    • Bear Crawl 5 steps  and do 4 push up
    • Continue increase the bear crawl by 5 for each segment and increase push ups by 4 each time
    • Most were destroyed by the end of the field except for Goodfella, Transporter and a few others
    • Pretty sure we saw Bottlecap in the yoga position by the end
    • Mosey to the hand rails by the school
  • Jack Web Supine to Leg Lifts
    • 1 Supine to 4 legs lifts
    • Everyone was happy to run out of time at 6 supines and 24 leg lifts
    • Mosey to the back of the front of the school for the COT


The fun and endurance of the PAX is always a great experience.  The friendship, camaraderie, and willingness to push each other is impressive.  The entire PAX was gassed by the bear crawl to push ups which made it a quiet run back to the COT.  I appreciate everyone’s to put up to with amount of addition needed for the workout.


  • 3rd F Opportunity every Sunday at 5 Stones Church from 7:00 to 8:00 AM.  Currently studying the book of John.  No preparation necessary.  Just come, learn and discuss.
  • Family F3 workout at Cuthebertson Middle School May 12th at 9:00 AM.  The workout will be adjusted based on the age of the kids.
  • June 8th, Pool Party to raise funds for the Sandbox.  $40 per person including beer and pizza. Event from 8:00 PM to 10:00 PM
  • Stub Hub said thank you for the baby gifts.  His wife was very thankful for the gifts. Stub Hub destroyed the bunt cakes.
  • Welcome Stacey Jarvis to the group.

Not in Front of Mother!!

On a beautiful Saturday morning, Five PAX moseyed on down to Outland to start their Saturday right. Here’s what we got into:

Mosey on down to the track

Run a lap for warm up- meet in the Circle for COP

20 X SSH

20 X IW

20 X Mountain Climbers

Head to the Track for Slim Fast Stretches

Four Corners- Sprint Straight aways, and at the corners do the following exercises

  • 10 LBCS
  • 10 Bomb Jacks
  • 10 Squats
  • 10 Flutter (4 Count)

First run- Straght

Second Run- Backwards

Third Run- High Skips


Mosey to the Tennis Court

Dragon Walk- at each line ascending Merkin (Start at 1, end at 9)

Bear Crawl Back- each line descending Merkin (Start at 9, end at 1)

Forest to the Sea

Bear Crawl first Court

5 Burpees

Crab Walk the second court

Reverse back

Lunge Walk across court- stop in the middle 5 Squats

Reverse Lunge Walk- Stop in the middle for 5 Monkey Humpers



5 Squats

5 Monkey Humpers


Paint the Lines (Entire Court)

Mosey to the school- find a lunch table

20 Dips

15 Derkins

10 Step ups (Five each leg)

Find the wall

Sit on Said wall for the people’s chair

Add arm raisesX50

Repeato- starting with dips/Derkins/Step ups

People’s chair- arm raisesX75

Head back for Mary



American Hammer

Freddie Mercury

5X Monkey Humpers



A great workout with some great guys today. We got it started out right with Smokey rightly noticing the beautiful tan line that the Wells Fargo Championship provided me- with a later start time, I didn’t take into account that it would be lighter outside.

They guys showed up to play- all of them cranked through four corners relatively easily with a good amount of mumble chatter- but then came the tennis courts.

I had the privilege of working out with the guys from F3 Dallas Wednesday, and AlrightAlright brought a proper beatdown on a tennis court. Seeing as Outland had a tennis court (first time I’ve had one at my disposal)- I couldn’t miss the opportunity to bring a little bit of what I learned from there here. News Flash- it was just as rough the second time around as the first.

Smokey had some some “reservations” about the Monkey Humpers- something about not wanting the shame of having to do them in the light…. oh well! Even though there were several times he starting doing additional MH when not called for… methinks he doth protest too much!

As pulled into the front of the school for Mary- lo and behold some of the teachers for Saturday school were standing out front, Leading Smokey to plead- “Not in Front of Mother!!” hoping to avoid additional monkey humpers- so of course we audibled  add some monkey humpers.

Well done guys- it was quite a hard workout but yall were more than up to the Task.  Great to see Bonhoeffer again- as well as Christmas and Arsenal. I’ve seen each of them on occasion at either a Area 51 AO or on one of my few Union Co trips- they all brought their lunch pail today and were ready to grind. T Claps to Christmas  especially for showing up on a Saturday morning right after getting back from a work trip the night before. Oh and of course Smokey was out front most of the day as well.

Thanks guys for the opportunity to Q Outland- I always enjoy my forays into Union County, and this was no exception! Honored to be able to lead.


21 men gathered in anticipation of the Cinco de Mayo edition of #F3RockZero. We were later joined by 2 others from #F3Area51 (the workout) to make our total 23. Here’s a recap of what we did:

The Thang

Mosey from our launch spot down to the Calvary pitch for COP. Burpees x 5 OYO; IWs x 5 IC; Merkins x 5 IC; MCs x 5 IC; LSS x 5 IC; LBCs x 5 IC.

Walk over to the base of the grassy knoll and line up abreast for a triple nickel. Merkins x 5 at the top; Jump Squats x 5 at the bottom; 5 times through. Plank when done.

Mosey to the front parking lot. Line up abreast at the first island. Do 5 reps of called exercise at first island, third island, fifth island, seventh island then run to end. Turn and run back to first island to complete 5 reps of called exercise. We did this 5 times through.

  • Merkins
  • Jump Squats
  • LBCs
  • CDDs
  • Burpees

Mosey to hot box and find a bench. 5 sets of 5 reps of called exercises.

  • Lil Haze left leg
  • Lil Haze right leg
  • Dips
  • Decline Merkins

Plank when done. Mosey to the rock pile by Rea Road Field. Find a partner and one lifting rock. Partner A does 5 curls, 5 tricep presses, and 5 squat thrusters on repeat while Partner B runs to playground for 5 pullups and then runs back. Flapjack. Then repeat until each partner had gone 5 times.

Mosey back toward base for some time killing moves. Line up abreast along curb.

  • Lunge walk to first parking lot line, sprint to far curb then sprint back
  • Bear crawl……..
  • Backward bear crawl……..

Mosey back to launch point for Mary. LBCs x 5 IC, Flutter Kicks x 5 IC, Dollies x 5 IC, Straight Leg Lift x 5 IC, Toe Tap Crunch x 5 IC, Rosalita x 5 IC. Then Repeat.

5 burpees OYO. Done.


A lot of old school Twitter banter last night. Pro even found his old Shetland Pony pic. It was fun. Remember when Twitter was our thing. Instead now, we get 27 useless Slack notifications about someone looking for a good plumber.

Mumblechatter was high this morning but it always is when Gummy posts. Makes up for his blatant refuseniking. Thankfully Marge didn’t post in his Clemsux shirt or it would been the trifecta along with Gummy and Hammer. JetFuel only mentioned Saban once to them, which was PR.

Solid group of Respects out there this morning with OT, Marlin, Snowflake and Iron Horse. YHC only hopes to be able to move like that when I’m really old like them.

Rather than have a Man Date at #F3Area51, OT and Turkey Leg drove over to join us right after the Triple Nickel. Great to have them out to join us.

Spidey, Brew’s 2.0, put in a solid day’s work this morning. Really crushed exercises and runs in the front parking. And totally savage rolling up in a Canada track jacket on Cinco de Mayo.

Mexican Independence Day is September 16th.


  • May 26th – Memorial Day weekend convergence at #F3RockZero. Great workout where we read citations of a few soldiers who paid the ultimate sacrifice.
  • May 28th – Patriot 5K and workout in Metro.
  • Church on the Street – Sign up or show up to serve.

Thanks for allowing me to lead. Always an honor.

-Lil Haze

Siren Call of the Parking Deck


SSH, Imperial Walkers, Freddy Mercury, Mountain Cilmbers, Merkins, all moderately reasonable rep counts. Blah blah blah. Mosey to garage

Infinity Loop

Partner 1: runs garage in figure eight pattern (up the end, down the middle, up the other end, down the middle) 5 burpees every time you reach the top.

Partner 2: 10 inclined pullups, 15 merkins, 20 LBCs repeat sets until Partner 1 returns then switch

Each partner runs the loop three times.


Mary for the six and then Mosey to aquatics parking lot

Lunge walk up hill, jog back

Bear crawl up hill, jog back

Sprint up hill, jog back

Repeat, with the sprint taking us back to launch

A few minutes of mary and done.


YHC made waves with his analogue watch, apparently everyone thought this was cool and now a new trend has been started. Despite rumours, the sun does not have to be shinning to get the correct time…

YHC was a little over eager to move on from the garage, nearly left the six trapped in the loop, sorry!

Lorax and Mermaid out front for the loop along with Purple Haze and No Show in the Hunt

Hops was crushing it

The Wall got out, nice post!

Strong work by all!

Cerberus…So Fancy, You Already Know

20 PAX in attendance for a warm and sweat filled morning with the wonderful sounds of mumblechatter.  5:30 came, off we went. No FNG’s but a lazy disclaimer was still provided.  PAX coming in on two wheels, hurry up cause we got places to go and no time to waste.

Warm Up:

Mosey to the back around Whole Foods and the $$Bootcamp$$ folks for some warm up:  All IC: SSH x15, Imperial Squakers x12, Mountain climbers x15, Merkins x15, Plank Jacks x15.

Mosey to Parking Deck.

The Thang:

–Parking Deck–

Merkins x15, up ramp running backwards, then plank jacks x15. Take stairs down to start, begin sequence again up 2 ramps with plank jacks x15 at top of every ramp and merkins x15 to begin, back down, etc to top of deck.

Plank work while we wait, various 6 inches, arm high work, topped off with 6 inch plank jacks IC x15


Mosey south to the artificial grass area. Grab some half wall.  Completed Derkins IC x20, Dips IC x20, then 20 jump/step ups. Then over to the street in between the overpriced and fancy boutique stores.

–Fancy Street–

8 light poles from start to end, jump squats to next light pole, 10 mountain climbers, run to next, 10 lbcs, all the way to end.   Mary until 6, Heels to heaven IC x20. Back to parking deck

–Partner Stair Work–

Partner up, as a team complete 200 donkey kicks, 100 mike Tysons, P1 runs up to top of staircase and back down while P2 does exercise.   Alf led the mary, LBC’s and Flutters IC x20. Back to fancy street.

–Fancy Street, part 2–

Bear crawl to light pole, then run to next, complete sequence to end.   Mary?

Just a couple of minutes left at this point.  Over to lot, suicides at each line and back to end.  Bratwurst led some American Hammers IC x30 to end the workout.



So it turns out YHC really sucks at giving out directions.   When my weinke was drawn up and memorized, I was good, no questions needed to be asked.   Yet today, the questions and many confused faces started rather early.    Look, just run up the dang ramp and figure it out  I’ll work on this for next time.       However, once we got going, it was all work.  Transporter was promised a lighter running day so the goal was to keep it shorter in distance than YHC usually does, at the same time keeping that heart rate up.  Plan achieved.   The PAX pushed themselves and never slowed down, I’m sure they were feeling it because I know I was.

Thanks for the invite.   It is always a welcome change to meet and work out with the PAX from other regions.   Great guys as expected.


FNG day at Cerberus next week, May 11 at 5:30. Bring a FNG or else…

June 8th-  Pool Party  8-10 PM Lawson Pool Waxhaw- Cost $40 to raise funds for Sandbox (promise no additional Shake downs)

Thanks Header for the prayer.

Derby Days

15 thoroughbreds stretched their legs at #F3Kevlar

The Thang

Mosey over to lower school lot for COP

  • 10 burpees OYO
  • 20 SSH IC
  • 8 burpees OYO
  • 10 TTT IC
  • 6 burpees OYO
  • 20 MC IC
  • 4 burpees OYO
  • 10 merkins IC
  • 2 burpees OYO

Mosey to John Street and down 51 to Reid Hall

Down the hill for 7evens:  burpees at top, monkey humpers at bottom

Mosey back to church and over Fullwood to Eden Hall

Partner up, loop around Eden Hall in different directions, meet for 10 hand-slap merkins, continue back to start, 10 burpees

Mosey back out to Marion and back to school

Circle up for classic round of Jack Webb 10/40  merkins/arm raises

Total Mileage: 3.6




  • Just coming off IR from post-marathon recovery, needed to stretch the legs a bit today
  • Put the pre-tweet warning out about “Derby Special”, yet still heard complaints (and not just from Pot Tart).  Not sure what folks were expecting when a racing horse emoji is included in the pre-tweet.    Maybe folks thought it meant I was taking bets after COT?
  • Anyway, went well getting to see most of the surrounding area in Matthews.  Maybe next time we’ll make it downtown.
  • Great to see all the young bucks out there (and the veterans – F3_Cage #respect).  Been a while since I’ve been to Kevlar with all the ^&%#%@!#@@@!! marathon training the past few months.  Great to be back.
  • Fault Line and Orange Whip – Appreciate the opportunity to take the Q
  • Derby Pick:  My Boy Jack to Show



  • Volunteer Opportunity at Christ Covenant Church tomorrow (Saturday) 9am-1pm – help with landscaping for butterfly garden, particularly moving mulch and other materials.    See Paper Jam for details
  • Beer Mile, Friday March 11, evening, at a local track.  See slack channel and Pop Tart for details.