Monthly Archive April 2018

Not since breakfast

11 guys gathered in a church parking lot on a rainy Saturday morning. According to section 7, part b, subpart i of the RockZero manifesto, today was to be a light day. The men were disclaimed, and off we went. McGee complained immediately when we cut through the moist front yard and he got his shoes wet. We gathered near the intersection for a quick warmup (IW, MC, Monkey Humpers – Jet Fuel is terrible at Monkey Humpers) then started toward Davie Park.

We gathered near the gate of the dog park driveway. AYG to the second street light, then easy back to the first for 10 situps (more complaining from McGee about counting the light poles). AYG to the third, easy back to the second, situps. Repeat all the way to the end. My weinke was less detailed at this point – it said something like (“do stuff at the park”), so we improvised. We did plank walks with merkins on the parking spots, then 7s on a hill we found behind the building there. We explored a little more back there – some trails, a tennis court, picnic tables, sand volleyball – did some stuff, then AYG back to the gate. Ugh.

Recover with a little mary, then over to the playground. We discovered some fancy new playground equipment there, including a police line around a missing swing. There were lots of theories about what happened there, but we pressed on. Partner 1 does a hot lap around the lot while partner 2 does an exercise. Repeat for a few laps.

Then we headed back to the church via Indian Run, mixing in a little backwards/forwards running on the driveway. Time killers at the end included sets of 10 merkins, jumpups and dips on the picnic tables next to the building and the requisite “line up abreast and sprint to that other pole over there”. Done

I had low expectation for numbers this morning, but the guys came through. The rain mostly held off. If you don’t normally post on Saturdays, give it a try. The 7:00 start at RockZero is a nice change from the weekdays, and it’s a good group of guys. Today was a bonus since the rain meant everybody’s youth sports were cancelled, so we had a good crowd at Starbucks afterwards. Haze even stopped by again after his running club meeting.

Also, I’m having cake for breakfast.


“We STOP for Burpees” in WaxVegas!

Posted on behalf of Goodfella . . . Who after 2 years in F3 STILL claims he doesn’t have a login

This (delayed) Backblast comes after some “corporate” peer pressure from @Moneyball and @Bottlecap, which is ironic in and of itself! Since @Moneyball missed some major workout details in his Ghost-written BB in an effort to keep the “streak” alive for The Floater, I wanted to fill in the gaps. Here we go…

Thursday mornings have certainly gotten interesting lately in WaxVegas, with 2 great AO’s starting up recently. Pursuit is an awesome running workout in the/my great neighborhood of Millbridge, but The Floater sets up shop in beautiful downtown Waxhaw. YHC has been conflicted about which to attend since I enjoy both, but haven’t been able to make either lately due to some very overrated work travel.

After Bottle Cap pinch hit for us at Dromedary a few weeks ago, I told him I wanted to return the favor at The Floater. 4/5/18 would be the day for my first Floater Q. Needed to prepare for this, not to disappoint the Pax.

Warmup at Dreamchasers Brewery:

  • 20 SSH IC
  • 20 Mountain Climbers IC
  • 20 Plank Jacks IC
  • 15 Cherry Pickers (at the request of someone) IC
  • 20 Squats IC

The Thang:

Mosey across The Bridge and Behind Maxwell’s.

At each STOP sign = 3 Burpees. 7 total STOPS for Burpees (21  total).

Mosey back in front of Dreamchasers. Partner up at the Big Tree for “100’s” of each:

  • P1 Dips/P2 Run to STOP Sign & (1) Burpee
  • P1 Derkins/P2 Run to STOP Sign & (1) Burpee
  • P1 Knee-Ups/P2 Run to STOP Sign & (1) Burpee

All-in we did about (10) additional Burpees (up to 31 total now).

Mosey over to “KeithJongHill” since apparently every Floater workout ends up there

At each STOP sign = Burpees. 12 more Burpees completed. Total of 43 Burpees now.

Grab a Lifting Rock at the new construction site for more partner work.

150 Total Reps of each as a team:

  • P1 Bicep Curls/P2 runs up KeithJongHill to Stop Sign and back
  • P1 Tricep Ext/P2 runs up KeithJongHill to Stop Sign and back
  • P1 Overhead Press/P2 runs up KeithJongHill to Stop Sign and back

Repeat exercises for 100 reps of each:

  • P1 Bicep Curls/P2 runs up KJ’s Hill to Stop Sign and back
  • P1 Tricep Ext/P2 runs up KJ’s Hill to Stop Sign and back
  • P1 Overhead Press/P2 runs up KJ’s Hill to Stop Sign and back

Some did 1/2 reps so completed early. Repeat the above for 50 of each. All-in we ran up that nasty hill 10-12 times each.

5-minute warning sounded on YHC’s watch so we moseyed back to the Church. We didn’t forget to STOP for more Burpees so we got in (9) more on the way to COT. Grand Total of (52) Burpees as part of the workout. Nice work!

Quick Mary with 1 minute remaining. H2H and LBC. Name-o-Rama.


The Pax worked hard at The Floater (but not as hard as Rockwell did trying to figure out where to park in Metropolitan Waxhaw!), and I think even @theRealFrack enjoyed it since he got to lift rocks. Not bad when we can get >50 Burpees in over the course of a workout. Thanks for allowing me to lead the Pax and I look forward to future Floater Q’s, and maybe even another Backblast.

Moneyball already wrote up the announcements so I won’t repeat them.

Until next time, fellas!

Yet another Tiger…..

12 PAX braved chilly temperatures Thursday morning for the latest edition of Area 51’s finest AO, aka Hydra.  Since a FNG was in the mix, YHC issued an emotional, thorough, and legally sound disclaimer.  Off into the gloom commenced the PAX for the downpainment…

Mosey to the OPES bus parking lot.  Time to get this party started…


  • IW x20 IC
  • Merkins x10 IC
  • LSS x10 IC
  • Shoulder Tap Merkins x10 IC
  • Low Slow Lunge x10 IC ea. side
  • Ascending Merkin x10 IC
  • STRETCH interlude (at this point Puddin’ Pop seriously questioned his decision to go sans gloves)
  • MC’s x10 IC
  • Peter Parkers x10 IC
  • Parker Peters x10 IC
  • Burpees x5 OYO

YHC’s cadence was spectacular.  PAX’s count was, well, lacking.  “The leads are weak.”  Hops noticed the rather quiet count and rescued the PAX from slipping into a Spring Break nap by turning up the volume.  Thank you, brother.

Let’s mosey.   Left on Rea.  Right on Windyrush.  Stop at Windyrush / Windyrush intersection for Mary.  Right on Windyrush (confused yet?).  Stop at Windyrush / Edenbridge intersection for Mary.  Right on Edenbridge.  Meet by the benches under the ol’ oak tree.

  • Derkins x10 IC
  • Step Ups x10 ea. leg OYO, or
  • Jump Ups x10 OYO
  • Dips x15 IC
  • Lunges x10 OYO ea. leg

Mosey to the basketball blacktop, where Hops lamented, “Should have done COP right here.”  It would not be Hydra if rough pavement was not utilized.  Puddin’ is probably still picking asphalt pebbles and glass shards from his hands.

Partner Up, go to opposite baselines.

  • Bear Crawl to half court, 10 HS Merkins, Bear Crawl back to the baselines
  • Ditto for Crab Walk
  • Ditto for Burpee Broad Jumps (suck factor was HIGH at this point)
  • Squat Hold, going progressively lower during the 1 min. countdown
  • Plank Hold, going to 6″ 3x during the 1 min. countdown

Hot lap on the Windyrush / Edenbridge loop back to Launch.

Mary to wait on the 6.  The local female running group was congregating in the OPES parking lot after their run, and marveling at the PAX’s fine form under YHC’s stellar Qship.  That had to be it.  Or, maybe they were laughing at us.  Debatable.  Nevertheless, Cheese Curd’s M was part of the running gaggle and thus leading the cat calls.  Gut in, chest out, shoulders back…

To the baby track we go…

  • Lap 1 – Karaoke on straightaways, High Knees on Curves
  • Burpees x5 OYO
  • Lap 2 – Defensive shuffle on straightaways, Butt Kickers on Curves
  • Burpees x5 OYO



Welcome to FNG Revlon (Todd Mitchum) who made sure the PAX knew he was a Clemson guy.  Naming rights to Scratch and Win, who knew A LOT about Mitchum deodarant and its rich history with deep TN roots.  Revlon bought Mitchum in an incredibly hostile corporate takeover (ok, I made up the hostile part) led by Mitt Romney (made that up, too).  Mascara and deodorant sticks were hurled across the boardroom table.  All is well now, thankfully.  Hope to see you again soon, Revlon, even though you have tipped the balance of power decidedly in Clemson’s favor for this AO.  SEC PAX unite to stem the tide of this orange wave.  Wait, did someone say “Tide”?  Ummm hmmmm……  YHC does not even have to say it.  Know it.  Live it.  Love it.

Always an honor to lead this workout.  Thanks to Puddin’ Pop for the strong takeout.


“Walk a Mile in Her Shoes” on April 28th at 10:00 a.m., NODA Brewing Company.  Check out my Twitter feed for more details.  If you cannot make it, then please consider donating to this great cause and organization (Safe Alliance) who serve women victimized by domestic violence.


Guest Q and Guest Backblast Writer

Growing up as a baseball player, YHC’s father always said, “Great play + bad throw = zero. Finish the play.”

Our QIC didn’t finish the play. I couldn’t let his great Q and the great work from the attending PAX turn into a zero! Time to finish the play with a backblast.

From memory-

Warm up lap to side of Dreamcatchers

SSH x 20?

Mtn Climbers x 20?

Some other standard warm-up exercise and we were off

The Thang:

Stop Signs and Burpees. We took a running lap through backside of Waxhaw. Those of us with intimate knowledge of the downtown area expected to meet one of our brave boys in blue as we were heading dangerously close to the sacred playground.

Not sure how many stop signs, but seemed like 8-10 with 3? burpees at each. We ran all through Waxhaw with this stop and burp cadence. Then headed to #keithjonghill for the real fun.

Goodfella found a large collection of boulders blessed by our resident Rock Rabbi, Frack himself. We partnered up grabbed a rock.

Round 1: Curls and Runs

Partner 1 did curls while Partner 2 scaled #keithjonghill to the stop sign and returned. I believe it was 150 curls per team

Round 2: Curl to Press

Partner 1 did curl to press while Partner 2 scaled #keithjonghill to stop sign and returned. 150 on this one as well (the Q probably knows)

Round 3: Triceps extension

Partner 1 did curl to press while Partner 2 scaled #keithjonghill to stop sign and returned. 150? Again, the Q most likely knows.

YHC most likely missed an entire segment of the workout in the above backblast, but #thefloater has a spotless backblast record (in spite of GF and Stubby’s best efforts) so we couldn’t let the streak end…not like this.


Great to have Goodfella come run the Floater for us. He did a great job, always comes up with a good workout, and really pushes us. We just need to have him be as motivated to write backblasts as he is to win AMRAPs and burpee challenges! 🙂


Moving Shake and Bake to our area on Saturday- see Posse for more details

F3 vendor tent at Lawson- show up and show out. Maybe we can all do burpees or merkins in the Millhouse parking lot to show them what we got

F3 Saturday Family workout- 9ish 2 workouts. One semi-serious and another one a bit more fun and lower impact. Details being ironed out

Open Door Bible Study @7am at 5 Stones Office Sunday Morning

Thanks, Mad Dog for taking us out. Sincerest apologies if I missed any of you. I believe the number was 10…

Ponch and Jon – CHIPS Style

13 Pax ignored spring break fever for a Co-Q/Double Trouble beat down at Impromptu.

MoneyBall had the first 1/2 and non upper body portion -which aligns with his recovery plan for the fatty shoulder issue.

Warmup that Frack would be proud of – Run over to bus row – SSH/CP/MC and something else

The Thang – Start with lightpole squat (20 at each) on way down – way back (20) jump lunges (need the proper name) – (2 Q points from Posse)

Head to front of HS – 20 toe taps on bench and hot lap X2

Head to parking lot for Star – center to the four light poles with 20 bonnie blairs at each and 25 LBC’s at center each time

some mumble chatter as we had the handoff – “great planning” “so organized” were just some of the compliments going around

Parking slot progressive Merkin/Hurley.  Start at Parking Slot #50  move to next and perform merkin/back to #50 and 1 Hurley – continue to 60

Head over to Bench ampitheatre area – 20 Dips in Cadence (-2 Q points from Posse) and introduced the group to the Catalina Wine Mixer – 10.  Much debate over the # of steps this mixer entails – was it 5 or 6 or XXX(-2 Q points from Posse again)

Mosey to wall by HS Gym -20 Donkey Kicks (-2 QPoints from Posse) and 10 more CWM’ers

Mosey to front of Middle School – 20 more dips and 25 Peoples Chair Presses – led by Posse and you guessed it (-2 Q Points from Posse)

Mosey to cars for last set of CWM’ers – 10

Hope that everyone enjoyed the Catalina Wine Mixers – I heard rumblings about elbow pads – check with Yeast I heard he is not using his

When all was said and done this Duel Q workout came in at at robust 580 calorie count.

Based on the Posse Q scoring method this Q came in at a very respectable -10.  If you need a Q school instructor for the next batch of Virgin’s – just let me know – I’m available

COT/Pastor MadDog led us

Announcements: – Shake -N bake – move- follow Posse on GM,SLACK, Twitter for details.  Lou is working on family workout for saturdays.  Lawson Vendor fair April 21st? lets assist at the booth for good showing and recruitment.  Stub Hub has a critter on the way… advice would be to decline any advice from this crew.  And Ray is starting a new job which may infringe upon his Meme activity – offer him your support





3:10 to Yama

4 bros circled up on the blacktop next to Yama, a trendy Asian grub spot at the ole Waverly. Low numbers due to Spring Break, which was perfect for today’s weinke. YHC’s first post/Q in 90 days, disclaimer was a bit rough and unrehearsed, but it did happen.


Mosey over to the Whole Foods employee parking lot.

  • 20 SSH IC
  • 10 Merkins IC
  • 100 Walking Lunge Steps.
  • Mosey Over to the Parking Deck Steps.


Several trips up the stairs, all followed by a simple single step run down, some partners, some not. We stopped a few times to plank/merkin. Here’s what we got into:

All the below are up 6 flights of stairs-ish

  • Partner Wheelbarrows (1-step each arm)
  • Partner Carries
  • Triplet (run up the steps three times, 3 steps at a time the first round, then 2, then 1)
  • Lunge Walk (3 steps)
  • Alternate Lunge Walk and Stair Hop (2 steps at a time)

Pause for something different.

  • 5 Rounds
    • 5 Pull-Ups
    • 10 Merkins

Back to the stairs

  • Partner Wheelbarrows (2-steps each arm)
  • Triplet (run up the steps three times, 2 steps each time)
  • Stair Jump (2 steps at a time, all the way to top)
  • Stair Jump (3 steps at a time, all the way to top)
  • Stair Jump (4 steps at a time, all the way to top)
  • Lunge walk across the top of the deck (~ 100 steps)

Pause for something different.

  • 5 Rounds
    • 5 Pull-Ups
    • 10 Merkins


Mosey back the launch and square off. 20 count Mary called by each PAX:

  • LBC (Argo)
  • Sid the F’ing Kid (Wild Turkey)
  • Can Opener / Pistol Crunch (Poptart)
  • Russian Hammer / American Twist (Zekeface)

Mighty Moleskine

“Don’t call it a come back”, says Turkey. Fine, we won’t call it that. We will however call it a fun day at the Cerberus. Few PAX make for many weinke options and nowhere to hide (especially for the Q). A couple observations from the morning:

  • Good to workout with someone new (new to YHC). Zekeface was crushing it out there; hope the legs are ok for the run tomorrow.

  • Pop Tart complained about his knees. Some things never change (and shouldn’t)

  • Wild Turkey will still be calling Sid the Kid every mary oppo he gets, and will be demonstrating each time. Some things never change (and shouldn’t). Wild Turkey has the Q next week. Be there.

Argo out.

Exicon Execution

This backblast brought to you by my feet, cause I can’t lift my arms to type. Seriously though, shoulder, chest and arms smoker. Glad I can still deliver.

Disclaimed, mosey out lot and turn left. Toolbag about fell out. I guess he’s not an ambi-turner. Run out to Walsh and turn into back parking lot behind football field.

COP. BLIMPS. 5 Burpees, 10 Lunges (each side), 15 Imperial Walkers, 20 Merkins (shades of things to come), 25 Plank jacks, 30 Squats. BAM!!

Mosey around football field and to far stairwell of parking deck.

The thang. Contra Burpee ladder up stairs. 1 Burpee on level 1. 2 Burpees w/2 Merkins while down on level 2. 3/3 on level 3. Run to next stairwell. Do the same down 3, 2, 1. Run to next stairwell. Ladder up. Plank on the six.

For those counting at home that’s 68 Merkins thus far.

Blackjack AFAP. A little known or used exercise routine. Start on one side of parking deck (short way) do 1 Merkin, run to other side, 20 LBC. Adds to 21 = Blackjack. Get it? Good now really get it. 2/19, 3/18… This was a crowd pleaser and the only sounds heard were the groans of Merkins upon Merkins upon Merkins. People’s chair to recover for the six.

278 Merkins

Mosey to CCHS front door.

Bear crawl 1,2,3. Partner up. P1 does bear crawl up ramp. P2 starts chipping away at the 1,2,3. 100 Merkins, 200 Squats, 300 LBC. Flapjack. Repeato till 0600 hours. Many apologies for the 200/300 LBC/Squat screwup.

320ish Merkins

Mosey to launch

Six Minutes of Mary. 10x IC Dolly, Flutter, High Flutter, Heels2Heaven, LBC, American Hammer

Moleskinny: Been a few weeks since I have been out to Centurion. That’s my bad. A few pax came in on 2 wheels. Few new faces out there as well. As mentioned above Toolbag was completely taken aback when we turned left on little ave. Who knew he was that easily startled. A bit of an unorthodox COP. Done in a row across or abreast as some would say. Gotta be loud for the ends. Utah thought I was calling “ouch” not “out” for plankjacks. Glad your concerned for me friend but you might want to turn up the hearing aide. We took the long way to the stairwell noticing the stadium sign was nursing a broken letter R. Get on that Chelms. Contra burpees are a very contrarian exercise as noted by Ickey. 😘 blackjack routine is just downright disheartening. Checkpoint is still the king of Merkins. Things got tough around round 15. There was laboring going on during this one. Heard some serious grunts. You’re welcome. Cheddar and toolbag raced to the end. Chunder was a new face and lamented the bear crawl 1,2,3. He even asked about shortening it. Stone face was received and we plodded on. Truly blessed to be able to share time with all these HIMs.

Announcements: Check in with speed for need Scabby or Jrr Tolkien as they need some track commanders for upcoming races.

Prayers for the palmers as jennings and big sis prepare for a bone marrow transplant.

The stand at Panera. Studying Mark. If you don’t have a regular 3rd F. Get one.

Tour Of The AO, Plus Really Bad Instructions

My slack notification goes off on Wednesday night, its my beardless bro Tuck saying he forgot to correctly operate a calendar and get Qs scheduled more than 2 days in advance.  I said no problem, I had an evil plan I was already concocting which I would try out on the unwitting PAX of TheBrave because its the best damn AO south of 485 as everyone knows.

The Thang:

Mosey up to the stoplight by N. Community and Ballantyne Commons then head west on ye olde commons up the hill to Ballantyne Forest Drive, circle up in the first parking deck for COP:

IW: 0 in cadence cause this is a real workout 🙂

Merkins: 10 IC

Mountain Climbers: 15 IC
Slow Merkins: 10 IC
Peter Parker: 10 IC

6 Inch Plank: Hold for 10ish


Mosey along to the 2nd parking structure and assume peoples chair.  Conduct various versions of the chair and other calisthenics including donkey kick merkins while Pax conducted a running lap around the bottom of the structure (including Thin Mint’s general wandering… something about a bruised breast.)

Mosey over to the 3rd parking deck and run upstairs, around the top and gather on the wall in chair for air presses.  Mario found it necessary to advise there were more stairs available at the next garage down, very well…

Mosey to the final garage and run the stairs to the top.  Proceed to run down the ramps with 5 burpees at every other turn all the way to the bottom.  Back up the stairs and mosey back to the launch for….


Sandbag “tug – o – war”

We divided the group into two teams approximately related to speed so we didn’t have all the “fast guys” on one team.  5 coupons were procured and cones placed on the parking lot.  The plan was to run a lap around BOTH medians (Mario can’t listen to instructions and broke the game out of the gate… well broke it more anyways) keeping the teams together.  Upon returning to the start ONE member of the team can move any coupon 4 times towards their end of the “game board.”  Each move requires a bag-over burpee and then progress to the next cone with a “win” coming when all 5 bags reach one end or the other.  While one player moves bags, the rest of his team conducts merkins (or other moves deemed necessary)  Clearly YHC did not do a good job conveying the concept because the whole thing devolved into chaos within 30 seconds of starting… But burpees happened, laps were run, bags got moved and there was plenty of good natured ribbing (although I think Madam might still be pissed…)  After about 1.5 miles worth of laps we called the silliness off for Jack Webb to 7/28 and scene.


Ye Olde Moleskin:  Today was a stretch to be sure, an idea which sounded great on paper, but was too complex for a 5:15 start time it seems.  YHC enjoyed the fun, and the mumble chatter it caused however I believe the PAX went home underworked… I’ll make up for it next time.

Paper Jam posted TheBrave for the first time because Commish promised to meet him there, which Commish did about 45 minutes into the workout… Something about a plumbing issue.  Great to see you today PJ and come again, however I warn you that “carrying heavy things” occurs often in addition to all the running.

Bunker and Frasier were very vocal about how the Crossfitters must be making fun of our free workout as we ran about the parking lot.  Its cool bro’s, you too can pay 150 a month to cause irreversible damage to your knees and back if you want!

Mario never change my friend

Thanks for letting me lead my friends, see you in the gloom again soon.


Rockin the Road Trip Radio

A last minute sub Q for Blazing Saddles meant a hodge podge of exercises and tunes today for the men of Kevlar.


SSH x 10

IW x 10

Merkins x 10

Honeymooners til it hurt

Mosey to parking lot and partner up

Partner 1 runs a hot lap while partner 2 does called exercise and flip.

  1. Wide arm merkins
  2. Lunges
  3. Carolina dry dogs
  4. Jump quats

Mosey to soccer field still partnered up.

Partner 1 runs lap while partner exercises and flip:

  1. Tractor tire flip
  2. Louganis with weight plate
  3. Tri extensions with KB
  4. Suicides
  5. Dry docks on tire
  6. Push ups on exercise balls
  7. Squat press with KB

Indian Run around track with half group sprinting and others jogging – flip.

Suicides combos

Jack Webb with diamond merkins and ab exercises



Been a while since I had ventured out to Kevlar due to a dodgy back but good crew today. “Saddle Bags” had not realized he was on Q but I had heard he went under the knife yesterday so checked in last night and considering he cant lift anything for 2 weeks I took on the Q.

Random music today from  the Road Trip Radio Spotify playlist. Only pax I heard singing along was Busch and Nightcourt and plenty of dodgy tunes to grunt and groan to! Lots of cardio today cos I needed it so hopefully the lads got something out of it too.

Have a great Masters weekend fellas #goTiger!


YHC, Cooter will be the Q at Ascent this Saturday. The weatherman is calling for rain but that don’t matter. Either by rain or by sweat its going to be a soaken good time.