Redemption: The Story of Bullwinkle J Moose And The Relentless Fartsack

Redemption: The Story of Bullwinkle J Moose And The Relentless Fartsack

YHC had promised the day before that he was going to do the following:

  1. Show up to his own Q
  2. Provide Glorious Pain
  3. Make Sure the Workout leaned more towards George Carlin’s football analogy than his baseball one

His audience however, was a hard sell to convince for all 3 and on number 3 it became apparent that the goal of this workout was to “be safe and go home”  And here we…go

YHC arrived, much to the surprise of all. Goal number 1 achieved  At 30 seconds past 7, YHC yelled out Mosey and the work out began.  Mosey up the side walk, Kareoke once at the top, though YHC’s words were not conveyed effectively, E-harmony seemed to chime in to finish the sentence (right).  Once the middle of the side walk was reached, backwards mosey down the hill.

Circle Up



SSH x 15 IC

Imperial Walkers x 15 IC

5 Burpees OYO

Mountain Climbers x 15 IC


The Thang

Gypsy Bell

Grab a bell and circle up.  Do 20 of called exercise and pass the bell to your right.  Continue to do 20 of said of exercise until your bell has made it around to you.  As there were 14 participants, we only had time for 1 round.  20 Curls it is.  Apparently there was a lot of moaning and groaning about having too many reps.  Also there was some questionable questioning about YHC’s form.  YHC therefore stopped the revolution halfway.

5 Burpees OYO for questioning Q’s form.  (Because only North Korean style authority will do when YHC is on Q)

Pain Stations

6 Stations-1 Timer

Some background.  YHC had politely asked Hairband to retrieve his body..I mean sand bags for this very purpose.  Too bad someone did not receive said message until 5am and found his garage too cluttered to retrieve said bags (or maybe they were in actual use after one too many short jokes)

Station 1- People’s Shoulder Presses Against The Wall AMRAP

Station 2- Mini Hair Burners AMRAP

Station 3- Tricep Extensions AMRAP

Station 4: KB Swings AMRAP

Station 5: Lawn Mowers AMRAP

Station 6: Clean and Press AMRAP

Timer- Farmer’s Carry to the end of the parking lot and back

Now, YHC assumed that since there were 14 PAX, this would all be done in some sort or order going from back to front.  However, YHC’s lack of words (maybe I should have also added in the disclaimer that I am not an English major) led to multiple people doing the same exercise on any given turn with Sticky Note and E-Harmony double up on the shoulder presses and no one doing the KB swings at any given point.  Also, the token state and duke fans (shall not be named) apparently stopped along the way during the first farmer’s carry to chit chat about life and took 5 minutes to return.,.But I digress

People’s Shoulder Presses Against The Wall x 50 Civilian Count.  (YHC again called out for not being able to complete said task, though YHC only accidentally dropped his KB.  YHC decided to spare the PAX any burpees at this point, because the next exercise was…)

7’S on the hill- Starting with 6 flutter presses at the bottom of the hill, and then 1 burpee at the top



The End


Big shout out to Madison.  For while, he did not show up to said workout, his fartsacking of his own Q (due to “technological alarm clock difficulties”) provided some cover for YHC and appears to have lowered the bar some of what is required to Q (apparently just showing up is good enough now)

Bernanke was blabbering on about how the repeated arm curls might “hurt someone”, though what would you expect when your own workouts include strolls in the park and Glass Joe Merkins, that when actually required to lift something heavy, it will hurt.  Imagine that!

Glass Joe continuing to show everyone that the lord has apparently cursed some long-legged persons with bad form all around.

Playoffs-Kotters! Welcome back to the gloom!

It was an absolute honor to lead you all this morning PAX.  It is absolutely a testament to F3 that you all show up day in and day out to embrace the gloom and the suck to the fullest.  Thank you for the opportunity as always.


Sign Up for CPR classes.  Deadline to signup is 02/11.  $35 registration fee  Class is on 02/17 starting at 9AM. See Madison for location  This is a really good deal as it would usually cost $100 to take this kind of course regularly and it is good to be trained in CPR especially when in the gloom

Madison will have his redemption Q at Thrive this Tuesday, make sure your alarm clocks are set to AM and not PM.

Conviction will close down this Wednesday for mid-week convergence with F3 Mint Hill at Pain Academy.  Lets show some support for our F3 Mint Hill brothers as they showed up en masse last month at Conviction.

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1 Comment so far

Hair BandPosted on4:53 pm - Feb 10, 2018

Nice BB!
For the record and to get the full story, you did not send the request for the bodyba… Um…sandbags until after 11pm so there’s that. Also I did kb swings on my first round because they are an awesome full body weight/cardio beatdown.

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