Slow Smoked Q #hashtag

Slow Smoked Q #hashtag

Mosey to the picnic tables.

Quick COP: IW x15, SSH x 15, Squat x15

11s: Declines and Dips

Mosey to the football practice filed at the back.

Broken Arrow (fancy term for run 100 yards and do an exercise).

Quick story. Back in the day we all tried to outdo each other with self-indulgent Q creativity. I showed up at Governator with a bow and arrow. Fire arrow. Race to the arrow, 10 burpees, race back, 10 of some other exercise. Rinse and repeat. Quickly broke my son’s bow and arrow and resorted to just running 100 yards on the Carmel Middle football field #cleareyesfullheartcan’tlose #toolongforahastag #canyouhaveanapostropheinahashtag #arehashtagsstillcoolwhenyouaren’tevenontwitter? #canyouhaveaquestionmarkinahastag #chicoisawesomeandsmartandcoolandanaawesomeQandhasahotwifeandisgenerallybadass. Someone thought it was cute to call that Broken Arrow. Egypt thought it was cute to start calling me Catniss, which was better than what he had been calling me, which was Tolbert or Tub of Mayo #flattering. Of course I used to just call him jack ass, which is yet another story related to hand release merkins, which then became known as jack ass merkins, but only to about 10 people. OK, that story wasn’t so quick. At least I didn’t tell the whole jack ass merkins story. Or stories about my high school girlfriend, which sort of gets referenced later #southerndiscomfort

We ran 6x 100 yard “sprints” with the following exercises: Dolly x20, Flutter x20, oblique left x 20, oblique right x20, LBC x20, heels to heaven x20.

Absurdly long suicide. (First light and back, midfield and back, next light and back, end and back).

Gummy 10 count (IW x10).

This pause brought to you by the long North Carolina tradition of slow smoked Q.

Run to the other football practice field.

Run back and forth dropping for 5 wide arms every time Q yells “hit”

Hannibal seemed to think that was too few, until we had done 8 or 10 hits, after which he called for an audible. Nope.

Leave the friendly confines and head down Summerlin. Funny thing. Hills usually seem longer going up. This morning, running down Summerlin seemed to be about 9 miles. Perhaps d/t the knowledge we had to run back up.

There’s a bit of a half-pipe that crosses Summerlin at the bottom, so we ran that with 10x hand release merkins (aka jack ass merkins; see Egypt story, supra). Total of 50 jackass merkins.

Embrace the inevitable and run up Summerlin and back to parking lot for three minutes of Mary (aka Hannibal’s honeymoon, aka the Wake Forest Sigma Nu #anothershotatHannibal #anotherhashtag #seriouslywhydowedotheseinbackblasts). Freddy Mercury x10, Dolly x 15, Low slow squat x 15, Flutter x15, Jack ass merkins (again) x10

The Weather:

We shouldn’t be wringing out shirts in mid-October. Actually I don’t think that was real sweat. It was some fake news haze dropped from commie hybrid blimps piloted by Al Gore as part of the vast left wing conspiracy to convince us climate change is real #itis. Brought to you by the same people that think dinosaurs were real #theywere, or try to convince us of that so they can make billions selling fake fossils. #bigpaleo. Seriously, big paleo, look that one up. #christiansagainstdinosaurs … real thing. I’m gonna start a new movement called #christiansfordinosaurs because dinosaurs are awesome #likechico. If you take nothing else from this backblast take this: Chico … pro-dinosaur.

Mumble Chatter:

Pretty sure Hannibal was talking smack the whole time but I was smoked pretty early and lost my ability to comprehend pretty much anything. 20 minutes in any mumble chatter became about as comprehensible as the average Fishwrap backblast. If you don’t know Fish #gooddude, reading his backblasts are like watching an Italian “art film.” 10% of you feels inadequate for not understanding, while the other 90% is pretty sure even the filmmaker has no idea what the heck is going on. I was hanging on for dear life in my stupid fake sweat Al Gore conspiracy haze drenched long sleeve shirt, leading from behind and trying to keep a running list of the Larry Birds. For your reference, they were everyone listed above not named Chico.

Announcements/Prayers:

Southern Discomfort is soon. Not sure what it entails, but from the name I think you drink bad liquor and try to make out with a redneck girl in the back of a Volkswagen. F3 Golf is also very soon.

Prayers/thoughts for the Kocmond family. 16 y/o boy Nathan missing since Monday. Father is an Area 51 F3 brother.

Prayers also for my client Molly Offstein, a collegiate runner hit by a car, who recently showed her first signs of emerging 6 months post-accident. Long road ahead.

Thanks to Queen for the nod and One Eye for the takeout. It has always seemed to me that saying “thanks for the takeout” makes it sound like the person who prayed brought takeout to my house or something. Like I was sitting there watching the rather disappointing Indians/Yankees game last night and One Eye just randomly showed up with a couple of bags of Chinese food. Though that would have been awesome, and the wife and kids would have appreciated it #nomeatloaf, the prayer was great too.