Monthly Archive September 2017

Back To The Basics

12 Goats gathered on a great early Fall morning to get Back to the Basics… having basked in the glory of a more than solid BRR showing, it was time to return to the building blocks for “the next…”

I’m not sure we ever disclaimed… so by reading this BB, you agree that you are agreeing that I’m not a professional, and you exercised at your own pace, and that you won’t sue me…. yada, yada, yada…

The plan was simple:

  1. Mosey to the track; 2 laps warm-up; dynamic stretching
  2. 5 min I-Pace; 4 min recovery;  Rinse and repeat
  3. 4 min I-Pace; 3 min recovery;  Rinse and repeat
  4. 3 min I-Pace; 2 min recovery
  5. 2 laps cool down…. DONE!!

5-5.5 miles completed depending on pace… EXCELLENT JOB!


The track was getting lonely… so we HAD to oblige our commitment to use said track!  It was like a long lost friend that we hadn’t seen in a lonnnnggggg time!  Perfect weather… and it was great to return to some more speed-focused intervals.  SIDE NOTE:  Experienced Mountain Goaters should be thinking of the following in terms of their weekly training:

  1. 50% of your weekly running should be Easy/Slow
  2. 30% of your weekly running should be Medium/Tempo
  3. 10-20% of your weekly running should be Hard/Interval

If you combine those different “types” of training, you will see results, and you will avoid injury.  What we do on Fridays for most of us counts for #3.  I will be honest that I definitely don’t do enough #1… but that is a personal problem…. #TWSS.

It was great having Bullwinkle join us!  Thanks for getting up early, and tackling something I’m assuming pretty new for you!  You are always welcome to join us!!

Also great to have Costanza… this is his second time out, but I missed the first one… so site-FNG to me!  Great to have you out!  I’m very proud of you also tackling this running-thing, including your soon-to-be 2nd 5k!!

Congrats to Benny on your 1-Year Anniversary!  You have become an exceptional PAX and leader in South Charlotte, especially at Peak 51 and Mountain Goat.  I know you go to lesser sites… :-), but I consider those 2 your home!!

I love having everyone there!  There are many different levels of runners, which is great!  Thanks as always to the regulars that are there every week… Retread, Sensei, Gullah, Lois, Tweetsie, Nomad, Adobe, Drano… this doesn’t happen without you guys being there week-in/week-out!


  1.  Isabella Santos Run this weekend… Ballantyne YMCA
  2. Susan G. Koeman… Speed for Need at both of these.
  3. F3 Golf Tournament

Thanks to Tweetsie for the prayer out!



Chesticle Friday

I was blindsided Monday by Orangewhip when he asked me to Q, which I agreed to.  All week long Faultline and Orangewhip were nervous on whether I was serious because they both reached out to me during the week to double check.  I was, so here we go.

Mosey to lower parking lot close to playground.




The Thang:

Partner up with the person next to you, unless you are Horsehead, and Catch Me if You Can out of parking lot, right down Covenant Church Lane, around church to Fullwood, left on Fullwood up to Avington Place.  Apparently the guys have a real hard time with directions, so I had to explain 5 times.  It might have been the marbles in my mouth.

Once at Avington, we ran counterclockwise around the neighborhood and performed 15 merkins at each intersection.  The neighborhood formed a perfect loop, except for the first 3 turns, so very easy to follow. Once we were done, take a right on Fullwood to new townhomes across the street from the church.  Similar concept as before, except 5 hand release merkins at each intersection as you complete loop.  Mosey back over to the parking lot where we warmed up.

Perform 20 dips on benches, run to the top of the parking lot to Covenant Church Lane, 20 monkey humpers and back down.  Repeat 2 more times.

Mosey back to the soccer field by the launch point for a time killer.  4 sprints across the field then back to the parking lot for some Mary.

20 X LBCs

10 x Cross Crunch each leg

10 x Toe Touches

20 x Flutters

10 x Can Opener each leg


I have not posted many times to Kevlar over the summer due to BRR training so it was nice to get back out there.  Funny though that OW asked me to Q, and then it doesn’t show.  Lame.  Tackling Dummy did not enjoy the running part very much and said he will never post at a workout led by someone who just did the BRR.  Trust me, I am not a runner, just being proactive for all the empty calories from the beers I plan to consume this weekend off.  Alf was really hard on himself that he couldn’t quite touch his toes on the toe touches even though he has short legs, but he made up for it by leading the pax on the runs up the hill.  My guess is Turkey Leg could touch his toes but not sure.  I had to resort to hand release merkins on the second loop as my form was called into question immediately by Alf.  It is hard to cheat on HRM, so I hope I passed his test.  Swiss Miss took off like he stole something at the beginning and kept it up the whole time.  Alf, TL, Squid and Fletch were pushing hard on the hill, and impressed by Cottontail and Younglove pushing hard all the way until the end.  Great work by the entire Pax.   Thanks for the take out Squid.


Isabelle Santos run tomorrow

F3 Golf 10/27

November 4: 5k run at Covenant Day


PREBLAST: The revenge of the Tabata at Ascent

With the Isabella Santos / Speed For Need race this Saturday, Ascent will remain open as a 7 am workout option! So all y’all over at the Rock Zero, c’mon up Rea road a bit and join us at Olde Providence Elementary

We will be featuring the Tabata timer (A form of HIIT) which will scale regardless of ability. So take advantage of this to tighten up that EH on that FNG you’ve been targeting, call up the PAX that have fallen off the radar, etc. They will survive, and it’s an easy refusnik if injuries prevent running. (All running will be optional in nature)

See you in the gloom

AMRAP – Yuge Crowd, Bigly Performance

Yet again at Impromptu a lot of new PAX (8) and old PAX (22 including a young-looking Recalculating in his newish “athletic fit” plaid shirt) took to the best AMRAP course this side of 12 Mile Creek.  The weather was a little cooler which hopefully contributed to some better performances as well.


To get the PAX fired up for the day, we had a Motivational Speaker take us through warm-ups.  Foley kicked us off with his VQ – Nice Job!  He apparently had been preparing for days by the looks of the small pad of paper he brought with him for cue cards.

Mosey to front of middle school.  Disclaimer given.  SSH x 25, Merkin x 20.  Mosey to the back of the high school for the action.


AMRAP challenge. Consists of about a 1/2 mile lap with 7 exercise stations along the route. 30 minutes to complete as many laps as possible. Stations included:

  • Merkins x 20
  • Dips x 20
  • Box Jumps x 20
  • WWII sit-ups x 20
  • Curl to Press x 20
  • Suppines x 20
  • Burpees x # of laps completed

After 30 mins, we gathered up the PAX and slogged back to COT


Great effort by all today . . . every PAX got at least 3 laps in.  Nice work.  8 PAX took to the course for the first time while 18 returning PAX either met or beat their previous best performance.  Great job by Goodfella leading the way and matching his course record.  Shout out to Rockwell for being the only PAX to make all 6 AMRAP workouts.  Here are the results:

PAX April May June July August Sept
Goodfella 3.5 5.2 5.2 5.4 5.4
Bottlecap 3.5 4.6 4.4 5.0
Dasher 4.5 4.6 5.1 4.5
Foundation 3.4 4.4 4.4 4.5 4.5
Hollywood 3.5 4.6 4.5 4.5 4.5
Crumbs (2.0) 4.4
Frack 4.3 4.4
Moneyball 3.1 3.3 3.3 4.4 4.4
Damascus 4.3 4.3
Recalculating 3.3 3.4 4.0 4.2
Rockwell 3.2 4.1 4.1 4.0 4.1 4.2
Crouton (2.0) 4.1
Toast 3.4 4.1
Foley 3.3 4.1 4.0 4.0
Hooch 3.3 4.0 4.0
Longhorn 3.3 4.0
Maple Syrup 3.5 4.0
Deflated 3.2 3.6
Segue 3.1 3.2 3.5
Shop Dawg 3.1 3.5 3.5
Big Tuna 3.4
Cobbler 3.4
Ole McDonald 3.4
Posse 2.5 3.3 3.2 3.4
Xerox 3.0 3.3 3.4 3.4
GTL 3.5 3.4
Blue Pill 3.0
Dirty Bird 2.1 3.0 3.0
Finch 3.0
Rocket Man 3.0
Baby Bell 2.3
Big Ten 4.0
Bookworm 3.2
Brexit 3.3 4.0
Chunky Soup 3.6
Das Boot 4.0
Delta 3.2 3.4
Doc McStuffins 3.4 4.6
Doughboy 3.4
Duck Dad 3.3 3.6
Gator Cub 3.0 3.4 3.5
Jingles 3.3 3.4 3.4
Kielbasa 3.6
Lamar 2.5
OutOfOrder 3.6
Popeye 3.1 3.1 3.2
Radar 1.5
Rooney 3.3
Shampoodle 3.1
Shriver 4
Striker 3.5
Swamp 3.4
The Abacus 4.5
The Hoff 3.2
Transporter 2.6
Yeast 2.5 2.6



  • Isabella Santos 5K:  Tomorrow (Sat 9/30) in Ballantyne Corp Park:  Show up and signup prior to race.  Over 60 F3 brothers and 2.0s are registered.  Join us at the “Speed for Need” tent at 7:45am to take picture and kickoff the race with the chariots REGISTER HERE
  • Susan G. Komen “Race for the Cure” (Next Sat 10/7 in uptown):  WE NEED YOU!  Union County PAX are taking the lead for this race for Speed for Need.  We will be pushing Cancer survivors in the chariots.  Come support “Heather’s Heroes” team (Ice9’s wife).   REGISTER/DONATE HERE


Keep it Between the Lines

Sixteen Pax were poised and ready to work at 5:30 sharp – maybe BW got a new alarm clock?  Warm up with a HB 5k around Carolina Courts and congrats to Hoffa who remained upright this time.


SSH (25);  Imperial Walkers (25);  LSS (20);  Merkins (20); Merkin-less Burpees

The Thang:

Line up in the parking lot for some work between the lines.

Round 1:  Shuffle right across the parking lot,  5 Burpees, shuffle left to starting point, 10 burpees, repeat but increase burpees to 15 and 20.

Round 2: Lunge walk from starting to end line, 5 Merkins, lunge walk back to start, 10 Merkins, repeat with increased Merkins to 15 and 20.

Round 3:  Same as above with Bear Crawl and Bomb Jacks.

Mosey to the island street.  Run to the front of the parked truck for 5 Monkey Humpers then to the stop sign for 20 Flutters, 20 CDDs, 20 Jump Lunges (Mary Katherines)

Run back to start with same Monkey Humper routine and repeat of Flutters, CDDs and Jump Lunges

Indian run around parking lot and then circle up for extended Mary (Rosa Lita with whip, LBCs, Dollys, Back Scratchers, and Protractor until time)


The line work turned out to be a gut check with the shuffle/burpees setting a strong early tone.  Mumblechatter was a bit light but steady throughout.  Not sure who was in the parked truck with the headlights on but they were treated to a front row seat to an impromptu  monkey humper show.  Sorry (not) for the blinding camera light during namerama.  I’ll be sure to turn that off next time cuz we definitely look better in the dark.  Great work by all to push through the grind.  Thanks for the opportunity to lead.


PREBLAST: AMRAP at Impromptu

Come on out to Cuthbertson Middle at 0530 on Friday to measure your progress in the best AMRAP course in Northeast Waxhaw.

What is AMRAP?  The challenge consists of about a 1/2 mile lap with 7 exercise stations along the route. 30 minutes to complete as many laps as possible.

Stations include:

  • Merkins x 20
  • Dips x 20
  • Box Jumps x 20
  • WWII sit-ups x 20
  • Curl to Press x 20
  • Supines x 20
  • Burpees x # of laps completed

BONUS:  Foley’s VQ on warmup . . . In a van down by the river!


PAX April May June July August Sept
Baby Bell 2.3
Big Ten 4.0
Bookworm 3.2
Bottlecap 3.5 4.6 4.4
Brexit 3.3 4.0
Chunky Soup 3.6
Damascus 4.3
Das Boot 4.0
Dasher 4.5 4.6 5.1
Deflated 3.2
Delta 3.2 3.4
Dirty Bird 2.1 3.0
Doc McStuffins 3.4 4.6
Doughboy 3.4
Duck Dad 3.3 3.6
Foley 3.3 4.1 4.0
Foundation 3.4 4.4 4.4 4.5
Frack 4.3
Gator Cub 3.0 3.4 3.5
Goodfella 3.5 5.2 5.2 5.4
GTL 3.5
Hollywood 3.5 4.6 4.5 4.5
Hooch 3.3 4.0
Jingles 3.3 3.4 3.4
Kielbasa 3.6
Lamar 2.5
Longhorn 3.3
Maple Syrup 3.5
Moneyball 3.1 3.3 3.3 4.4
OutOfOrder 3.6
Popeye 3.1 3.1 3.2
Posse 2.5 3.3 3.2
Radar 1.5
Recalculating 3.3 3.4 4.0
Rockwell 3.2 4.1 4.1 4.0 4.1
Rooney 3.3
Segue 3.1 3.2
Shampoodle 3.1
Shop Dawg 3.1 3.5
Shriver 4
Striker 3.5
Swamp 3.4
The Abacus 4.5
The Hoff 3.2
Toast 3.4
Transporter 2.6
Xerox 3.0 3.3 3.4
Yeast 2.5 2.6

Winer Diner the Gloom was Never Finer

Warm up

Squats X 20 IC
Squat straddle Hops X 20 IC
Sun salutations X 2

The thang

  • 100 Merlin March (.5 mile)
  • Plank series

Mosey Down Burnt Mill (1.1 mile)

  • Partner up (10 pull ups while partner holds Balls the wall) X 3

Mosey through woods to new greenway bridge

  • Bear crawl 150 ft across the bridge

Mosey Down the dark dirt ankle breaker path to the other bridge (1.4)

  • Bear crawl 150 ft across bridge

Mosey through park

  • the Farm lurker run and back to the flag (2.0 miles)




Welcome FNG “Winer” – “Winer DineHer 69Her” glad you made it out! See you next week!  Good work fellas.




SPEEDFORNEED!!!! SOB/Area 51/ Union County

Finally, F3 Nation’s South Charlotte Region (Area51 / SOB / Indian Land / Union County) inaugural SPEED FOR NEED race is just a few days away.  First of all, thank you so much for your support for the SFN initiative whether through your donations, encouragement, retweets, manpower, or ideas.  Saturday is our big day… over 60 signed up and a few more there in support! You will experience firsthand what we brothers have created together in SFN to celebrate our Track Commanders, bring joy their families, encourage our community, and share what F3 Nation is in all three of the F’s we proudly display on our chest.  It should be a great day!


Please review the schedule of events below so that the morning runs smoothly… the time will go fast (especially once Frasier starts pushing)! Make sure to be at the tent at 7:45am sharp for a group photo, and expect us to be let off early right before 8:00. Don’t forget to sign the poster board under the canopy with your F3 name (if your M or 2.0s want to sign, that’s great!).  SFN shirts will also be sold for $20 at the canopy if you would like to wear one (kids and adult sizes).  Our canopy will be at the end of sponsor row, closest to the starting line. Finally, if anyone gives us an inquisitive look, give them a business card with F3 on one side and SFN on the other #EH.


We’re really looking forward to the event, and be sure to encourage our riders and their families while you are there.


–          Fire Hazard, Buckeye, JRR Tolkien


  • RACE EVENT: Isabella Santos 5k/10k/fun run
  • DATE: Saturday September 30, 2017
    • Drivers meet: 7:15am (see list below)
    • ALL PAX meet: 7:30am at the SPEEDFORNEED tent
    • Pictures: 7;45am
    • Race starts: 8:00am
  • WHO’S INVITED: F3 Nation PAX, their M’s and 2.0s (spectate & support or register to run)
  • MEETING POINT: F3 Nation SPEEDFORNEEDtent (Ballantyne Corporate Park)
  • DRIVERS: meet at 7:15am to meet the riders and coordinate
    • Chair 1: Fire Hazard, Buckeye, Goonie
    • Chair 2: Frazier, Thin Mint, Scabby
    • Chair 3: Fredo, Lex Luthor, Strawberry
    • Chair 4: Ickey Shuffle, Heartbreaker, Flipper
  • RACE Q’s: Buckeye and Fire Hazard

Contact: Twitter @F3SPEEDFORNEED or @JRRTolkienF3 or email

SFN… HELP Kids, GROW F3 Nation ~ Buckeye, Fire Hazard, and JRR Tolkien

A Minute Takes So Long but Goes So Fast

A week or so ago, Bullwinkle asked me “last minute” (his words) if I could Q Union County’s toughest moderate workout.  I was honored that he asked and quickly obliged.  BTW, there’s nothing moderate about the effort and exercises the 9 PAX put in at #F3Conviction.  Here’s an example:

05:30 – leave main lot & mosey to bus lot at back of school.  A few high knees and some butt kickers mixed in to help get the hamstrings warmed up.


IW X 20 IC


Merkins X 5 IC

Wide Arm Merkins X 5 IC

Mtn Climbers X 20 IC

The Main Thang

  • Partner up & mosey to (extra wide) bus parking spaces.  Face partner.
  • Perform 5 merkins.  Plank walk left to next line & do 5 more.  Repeat 5 times
  • Bear crawl from line to line.  Perform 5 monkey humpers at each line. Total of 5 lines
  • Circle up around the speaker for EMOM (every minute on the minute).  Timer is set for 1 minute.  Perform called exercises & # of reps.  If time is still left on the clock, that’s the rest.

Round 1

  1. 10 Burpees
  2. 20 Knee Up Squats
  3. 20 Merkins
  4. 20 Side lunges (10 each side)
  5. 1 Min of Toy Soldier
  6. 1 Min of Jump the Line (side to side)
  7. Run a lap

1 Min of Rest

Round 2

  1. 10 Burpees
  2. 20 Mary Catherines
  3. 20 Diamond Merkins
  4. 1 Min of Toy Soldier
  5. 1 Min Alpine Skier
  6. Run a lap

1 Min of Rest

Round 3 (Lightning Round)

  1. 20 Merkins
  2. 20 Knee Up Squats
  3. 20 Diamond Merkins
  4. 30 Mary Catherines
  5. 1  Min of High Plank
  6. 1 Min of High Plank (Right Arm high – 30 sec; Left Arm high – 30 sec)

06:15 – Mosey back to main lot



Everyone, including YHC, was on time this AM, although Playoffs cut it close.  Apparently he thinks STOP signs are YEILD signs at 5:29 in the AM.  If he weren’t heading to the AO, you would have thought he was on a mad dash to look for Elvis with the way he rolled through the Stop sign at the intersection before the school entrance.  He was the low scorer in the FFL, and we thought we would get to see him pay his debt, but Nomad has gone MIA and hasn’t provided the punishment.  Speaking of MIA, it was nice to see Sling Blade in the gloom.  He seemed to re-aggravate an old back injury during EMOM.  Let’s keep him in our thoughts & prayers for a healthy & speedy return.  Since YHC’s weinke was EMOM, it only made sense to provide music.  I believe it was Arsenal who approved the playlist.  It was definitely helpful to have a loud ‘noise’ to distract us from Shake n’ Bake’s Toy Soldier form. #notaprofessional.  The workout started with a good bit of mumble chatter but it quickly died down as the minutes ticked away.  To quote eHarmony, “a minute has never gone by so fast and at the same time seem to take forever.”  I still want to know what Bullwinkle’s “deconstructed burpee” is. #notaprofessional.  You can’t tell Woody was on IR for months earlier this summer.  Dude crushes every workout.  I guess he’s making up for lost time.  Gypsy enjoyed the beatdown so much (or is so strong) that he asked for more #Mary at the end. #hesnotright.  Glad we didn’t have time to oblige – I was smoked and hope everyone else was too.



Oct 7 – Anson Co. convergence.  UC PAX to help celebrate 3 yrs of Anson Co AO’s.  Clown car from Carolina Courts at 6AM on 10/7

Oct 7 – SpeedForNeed event at Susan Komen 5K.  Come support by being present &  representing F3.  Need people to be visible and available to answer spectators questions


The Secret

15 plunged into the depths of the sea of knowledge, and emerged with pearls of wisdom (and possibly some fresh calluses)



  • Side Shuffle Hop
  • Imperial Wanker
  • Lounge
  • Squatting bull

20 Swings + 10 Merkins, repeat X 5

Swing / Clean / Hi Pull / Snatch combo – continuous movement
Repeat x3, x6, x9, but not x12

RDL / Goblet Squat / F Lunge / B Lunge – continuous movement
Repeat x3, x5, x9 (sketchy), and most definitely not x12

Partner Up:

Teabag x 10, Overhead Press x 10, Teabag to Overhead press combo x 10

Clean x 10, Press X 10, Clean and Press combo X 10

Swing x 10, Goblet Squat x 10, Swing to Goblet Squat combo X 10

Snatch x 10, Reverse Lunge X 10,  Viking Salute x 10 (click link for video)

20 Swings + 10 Merkins, repeat until 6:15




Here’s a tip – don’t bet on billiards with anyone named after a state (Minnesota Jack, Arkansas Slim, the list goes on) or look for life-changing exercise instruction from someone who ate a pack of Nabs he found in his vehicle on the way to the workout.  That said, I noticed some guys really taking my swing instruction to heart this morning and I got a little teary eyed.  It could have just been catching a whiff of High Tides tank top (seriously, try some Tide), but I think it was a little bit more.  Header had out his preacher notebook and Bulldog was trying to figure out his Evernote password but couldn’t get Siri to understand the letter “R”.


Missing Turkey Leg this morning.  Probably posting Strava runs from the Shire again.  We await his return.  He still working on a autobiography novel about the incontinent jogger, “The Man with One Brown Sock”.  A screenplay starting Tom Hanks and Dabney Coleman is also in the works.


Voodoo was off searching for his true calling in life.  He was devastated last week upon learning that Elon Musk was not gas station cologne.  All of those quarters gone to waste.  He’s also trying to find out why his electric car only has a range of 3 miles.  Try the 600lbs of kettlebells in the passenger seat pal.


The general workout went a little like a Pandora station.  Keep skipping exercises until you have to listen to a commercial.  Hope you guys got your moneys worth.  It’s all optional, I suppose, but you’re not gonna look like this if you keep doing that.  #flex


Welcome Gaylord.  The Sorting Hat really flipped you a stinker with that name #notslytherin.  Glad you are still coming out.


Rumors of a Brown sighting.  Nowhere near a workout, mind you, but the man has been spotted.  Keep hope alive.


Ended the workout with a jewel from one of TRs series of “clean but weird” videos – the Viking Salute.  I received, in return, some various other salutes from the pax.  Smokey took a knee in protest and left his kneecap in the parking lot.


Finally, this morning marked the debut of my genius invention, the “Lockscreen Weinke“.   Save the weinke as a photo to the iPhone lockscreen and BAM – instant access during the workout.  Problem is, when you are playing the Alan Jackson Pandora Station, the controls cover up the text and it is rendered useless.  Oh well, back to the drawer.  It did serve to remind me though, that you need to be prepared for when life throws you a curveball.  Train to handle the unexpected.  Don’t get shaken up when something goes awry – it will happen.




All I can remember from this AM . . .


Probably some announcements too.  Contact Bulldog via his America Online email address for these.